25 Maxims On Relationships

[Warped Mindless]

The following are some general maxims on the topic of relationships. Free free to add more and/or discuss any of the ones I post.

Maxims:

1: Over the long term she should be investing into the relationship more than you.

2: She should never completely feel like she "has" you.

3: Don't stop flirting with other women just because you agree to a relationship. Let her low-key see that other women still admire you.

4: Use dread game to your advantage any time you feel like shes starting to pull away or invest less.

5: Do not fail to domestication attempts. This is where they slowly try to change you or your behavior. "You should wear your hair differently." "I don't want you going out with the boys on Friday's anymore." You get the point.

6: Have a goal bigger than her and make it your first priority.

7: Never stop increasing your SMV.

8: Meet silence and disinterest with more silence and disinterest. See #4.

9: Use Intermittent Reinforcement to shape her behavior.

10: Soft Nexting is a powerful tool. Google it.

11: She will never stop shit testing you. If she does then she is no longer interested and checking out of the relationship.

12: Dominance (within reason) is sexy, being a jealous bitch isn't.

13: Your GF/wife is NOT your therapist. Vent to your buddies or to an actual therapist.

14: For long term GFs look into Tantric sex.

15: Submissive, introverted, few male friends, non-dramatic, aims to please in bed.... a few big things to look for in a potential GF.

16: Put yourself and your missions first. You never get your lost time back.

17: Being needy and insecure will drive women away extremely fast. Don't be looking for constant reinsurance that she likes you and that everything is good.

18: Be unaffected by her emotional storms. You are a rock!

19: Always be willing to walk away!

20: If she breaks up with you, treat it like its no big deal (its isn't) and don't be a bitch. In almost all cases they will come back to you for sex (if it was good sex) in 6 months to a year.

21: Women thrive on attention. Weaponize your attention and affection and use it to serve you.

22: Relationships are NOT an equal partnership. Someone has to be the boss and that someone is you. That doesn't mean you need to be an over domineering asshole though.

23: Do not expect logic from women. Emotion is both their map and compass.

24: If she stops seeking sex from you she is soon to seek it from someone else (or already is).

25: She should always be chasing your attention and validation. Give her less than she wants else she will tire of it and you.

 

[Alpha13SC]

26. Set expectations early if you're going for a ltr, for things you like/you don't like(ex starting to smoke/get fat/etc) and stick to them, because they'll be always in your mind. This this also cover some hidden problems and that should 1st the focus, acting if the problem doesn't go.

27. Be careful to her self esteem if you know you can be an asshole sometimes, especially to things related to her body.

28. First chasing moment after a fight will set a precedent and she ll expect that. Being strong and open to communicate should be the solution.

29. You'll be compared to other boyfriends(exes or other girls). Know what value you're bringing in relationship and stick to it.

30. Minimize, better eliminate porn and masturbation. Otherwise sex can be affected so her mood.

 

[DonGately]

Virtually every girl has tried to come back to me in < 6 months, even some girls I've dumped somewhat harshly. Just had a girl come back after 8 months or so. If you're good in bed, this should happen regularly and you both might be better off as FWBs anyway.

26 and 27 are very important.

 

[Chase]

Awesome list of maxims! Super solid stuff here, @Warped Mindless.

I’ll toss in a bit more, on communication, devotion, and a few other bits:

31. Bring her “on your team” and involve her in missions to a degree for greater devotion.

32. Don’t give her anything mission critical though; during hard times, it becomes leverage (or she’ll quit).

33. Women seek out chinks in your armor when stirring up drama. If they find a chink, patch the chink.

34. Every girl has a goal (orgasms, polyamory, career achievement, commitment, marriage, children, a house, etc.) whether she’s revealed it to you or not. She’s most satisfied with the relationship when she’s moving toward the goal, or when you make her forget about the goal with good feelings. She’s least satisfied when she remembers the goal and feels like she can’t get there with you.

35. Women’s goals will change over time as their lives change. She won’t always want what she wants now.

36. There’s no point where a woman is “fully satisfied” and the drama/testing has ended for good. Even if you help her attain her goal completely, there’ll be another goal to follow it, a few weeks or months down the road.

37. Thus, the secret is to give her a little bit of what she wants when you can, but never more than you can afford to give.

38. The way a woman behaves when a relationship is mostly good is how she will continue to behave throughout ‘regular times’ over the course of the relationship. Temporarily pristine behavior when she’s gotten something she really wanted doesn’t last, nor does temporarily tempestuous behavior when she’s particularly unhappy. People always return to their baselines, given enough time (so long as the relationship remains satisfactory, in any event).

39. Good sex that doesn’t fully satisfy a woman leaves her hornier than either middling sex or earth-shattering, totally satisfying sex. Useful if you want more frequent sex.

40. That said, you should still rock her world sometimes, just so she knows she can get that with you (also: it’s more satisfying for you, too).

41. Makeup sex is a double-edged sword: it cements passion and devotion in the relationship, but it also conditions her to cause more drama when she feels a lack of passion and devotion.

42. A woman’s ability to understand who you are and your goals in life will always be muddled by her desire to get what she wants from you (or anger/annoyance at not getting it).

43. A woman isn’t really looking for whether your persons and thoughts are aligned. She’s looking for whether she can achieve her goals through you or not. She’ll cling to you when she can and set fire to the relationship when she fears she can’t.

44. Understandings achieved with women frequently aren’t linked in their minds to ‘the plan’ at all. Much/most of the time she isn’t agreeing with your thought process or plans; instead, she agrees because you seem dominant, confident, and self-assured. As soon as she has cause to doubt that, ‘the plan’ is in at risk.

45. So don’t get too worried about aligning your thoughts with a woman’s thoughts. If something needs to get done, tell her it needs to get done. You can explain why, but the main focus needs to be that it NEEDS to get done. If she drags her feet, stay there with her until she does it.

46. Your and a woman’s goals will never be fully aligned. However, you can choose women who are more or less likely to set aside their goals and assist you with yours, or you can choose women with less drive/passion whose goals are not as important to them.

47. There is a dissonance between relationships and children. An ideal romantic partner for most men is one who is submissive and supportive. An ideal reproductive partner for most men, on the other hand, is one who produces driven, focused, self-sufficient children (assuming a man desires offspring with good grades, good art or careers, well-chosen romantic partners, and who aren’t pushed around by others). You will usually have to sacrifice one of these to enjoy the other.

48. No matter how good things can seem with a girl, that can always go south, and often fast.

49. No matter how much drama a girl kicks up with you, she will usually recover, often sooner than you think.

50. The happiest man is one who would love to be free from any relationship and enjoy his bachelorhood if it came to that. He is able to enjoy his woman for who she is without neediness, and when things get bumpy, he doesn’t break. Never give yourself so over to a woman you can’t live without her; she may ask you to, but you will only have the fullest devotion from her if you don’t.

 

[Warped Mindless]

Great list @Chase thanks for writing it up!

 

[topcat]

Just came back to this thread and was reminded of what a gem it is!

Can we get this stickied for posterity’s sake?

Would hate to see it buried and lost..

 

[Chase]

@topcat,

Can we get this stickied for posterity’s sake?

Done!

 

[topcat]

@topcat,



Done!

thanks!