Calls & Texts 4 Observations/Questions from applaying Chase's BIYC (Ball in Your Court) Text

[Witcher]

Hello everyone,

It's been a few weeks since I started to implement the Ball In Your Court or BIYC text from Chase. I would like to share some observation and some interrogation I got about it :

1.Most girls continue to message me and send me memes and comments on stories after I sent them the BIYC text.

This is especially true with girls I already developed a form of texting banter back and forth or are in my extended social circle, even more for girls you have on Instagram.

In such a case, what would be the best option, not answering? Answering but lightly? Or continue the banter but not ask her out ?

2. When the girl gets back to you, are we expecting her to just tell us that she is now availabile or is it also her responsibility to choose the place/activity of the date?

As a longtime GC reader, I do not consider it good to let the girl choose the place/activity of the date but this example of BIYC texts confused me a little bit :

“Haha, all right. Well, I know you’re super busy and I’m not good at doing the whole chase-you-down thing. So you’re in charge of planning the next meet, whenever your schedule permits – just let me know a little ahead of time.”

“Hey, no worries. I think that’s 3 meets I’ve planned you’ve had to take a rain check on, so planning for the next attempt is on you! You’re the busy one, so I’m leaving that ball in your court. Just let me know when and where once your schedule allows.”

If someone can clarify this?

3. When she get back to you ? Jump direct or make her work a little bit ?

In one article Chase advises to follow with setting up the meeting: "When a Ball In Court Text succeeds (and she messages you to meet up), you'll respond next with Text 5: Proposal Text."

In another article, What to Do When She Gets Back in Touch, Chase advises making her work a little bit before compiling with her .

What would be the difference between these two approaches?

4. In his most recent texting article Chase recommends that if we don't hear from the girls after 4+ weeks we could re-engage her with his resurrection text :

"What do you text a girl who falls into the other 50% who don't text you back?
You send her the resurrection text we talked about just above this section "

Does this go against the whole point of the BIYC text? Also, it contradicts other BIYC Articles where it is stated that we should not re-engage her.

Thanks !

 

[gameboy]

I fail to see the context here. Why are you sending these texts in the first place?

Why to several girls at once? And why are they continuing to send you texts and memes afterwards? Are these are girls from social circle, from work, or girlfriends?

 

[Chase]

@Witcher,

With the girls who keep messaging you memes/banter, give them little reactions but don't otherwise engage or ask questions. e.g.:

HER: [MEME]​

​

YOU: That's a good one!​

​

three days later​

​

HER: Just saw a guy with your exact same hairstyle. Looks like you're not so unique anymore.​

​

YOU: Haha. Time to call my fashion lawyer.​

​

two days later​

​

HER: [MEME]​

​

YOU: Crazy stuff!​

So you're giving her enough feedback to keep her chasing, but not enough that she ever fears like she cleared the awkwardness that came from not agreeing to meet up with you. What you want to happen is for her to eventually feel like a.) she's so invested but b.) the awkwardness from her not meeting up with you still is not dispelled, so c.) she just wants to dispel it. Either by asking you out or by playing dumb and asking why you're not as responsive to her anymore (at which point you just tell her "Oh well I thought you were busy, I didn't want to hassle you. I was just waiting for your schedule to clear up some. I figured you would let me know").

Re: her vs. your responsibilities in the reconnect text --

The only thing you're looking for here is something from her to the effect of "Heeey! I'm more available now!"

That's all the majority of girls will do, and that is enough.

Some will try to pick a time or place, but most won't.

If they do, you can evaluate whether the time/place is on your terms or not, and if it isn't, just propose something else.

Re: going for it right away when she reconnects vs. making her work --

That depends on a.) how flakey she was in the past and b.) how eager vs. blasé she is in her reconnect message. If:

• She repeatedly set up dates with you in the past and THEN later on cancelled/flaked, AND/OR
• She is pretty bored/blasé/low investment in her reconnection text ("Hey, FYI, I'm freer now, if you wanna get something scheduled")

... then you need to make her work a little bit before you actually agree to the meet.

However, if:

• She just simply wasn't available before, not agreeing to dates then repeatedly cancelling them (which is worse), AND
• She seems pretty eager in her reconnection message ("Hey! Whew! Finally finished all that craziness up. All right! I've finally got time to hang out again. Want to plan something out?")

... then in that case you should be on that like a fat kid on a chocolate donut.

Re: using resurrection texts on girls who don't respond to your BIHC text --

Well, I should've stipulated separate conditions for that case in that article.

But anyway, with a girl who just "standard ghosts" you, you can resurrection text her the normal 3-6 weeks later.

On the other hand, if you tell her the ball is in her court, some of those girls may not get back to you until 6-8 weeks later. Depends what's going on in their lives. If you resurrection text them to early, you risk jumping the gun, plus looking overeager, plus going back on what you said.

For these girls you basically want to let enough time go by that the girl forgets why she was so flakey with you, and so that you reach the point where she's likely also forgotten she was even supposed to get back in touch with you (and can presume that you, too, forgot you were waiting for her to do that). You want it to seem like she randomly popped into you head after all this time has passed, you sort of don't remember where you left off with her, and you figured you'd reach out to apologize for being flakey and try to reconnect.

So my suggestion here is your put her on ice for at least 3 months after a BIHC text to her before using a resurrection text.

Just to give her the full amount of time to get back in touch herself, plus to have enough time pass that you'd both likely have forgotten why you stopped texting in the first place and that she was the one who was supposed to get back in touch with you.

Hope that helps!

Also, for anyone just tuning in, one other relevant link:

Tactics Tuesdays: Who Should Use a BIHC Text?

The ball-in-her-court text can be very effective at getting flaky girls onto dates. It’s also easy to misuse, however… and even sabotage your attractiveness with. Recently on the forum we had a relatively new member claiming the ball-in-her-court text “doesn’t work” for him, and that women can...

www.girlschase.com

Chase

 

[Witcher]

Hey @Chase

After a while using the BIYC text I observed some very interesting stuff with most chicks :

1. Most of them do come back !
2. They always reach back to me after one month to six week, it was rare to have them come back sooner or later !

The most interesting and confusing part :

They come back to you YES, but don't ask you-out as mentioned. Rather they do one of these two things :

1. Open the conversation with you by either sending you a MEME/Reel on social platforms, react to story, then proceed to ask how you're doing
2. Just message you casually asking "Hi you how you are doing" or "How have you been"

Now some questions :

1. Can this be another way for the girl to tell you "HEY ! I got it I got the lesson, can you now ask me out, I'am available, I just want to save face !"
2. 2-Or is it just the girl coming back for free attention AGAIN?

In this context should we :

1. Just ask the girl out and forget about it ?
2. Continue wiht the same reccomaned appraoch for when she keep messaging you after BIYC ?

Of course any other ways or comments are welcome

 

[gameboy]

"Hi how are you" is basically girl speak for "Please ask me out."

She probably doesn't even remember that you asked her to plan the next date. Even though it's right there in the last text you sent. So just ask her out.

 

[Barbian]

Hey @Chase

After a while using the BIYC text I observed some very interesting stuff with most chicks :

1. Most of them do come back !
2. They always reach back to me after one month to six week, it was rare to have them come back sooner or later !

The most interesting and confusing part :

They come back to you YES, but don't ask you-out as mentioned. Rather they do one of these two things :

1. Open the conversation with you by either sending you a MEME/Reel on social platforms, react to story, then proceed to ask how you're doing
2. Just message you casually asking "Hi you how you are doing" or "How have you been"

Now some questions :

1. Can this be another way for the girl to tell you "HEY ! I got it I got the lesson, can you now ask me out, I'am available, I just want to save face !"
2. 2-Or is it just the girl coming back for free attention AGAIN?

In this context should we :

1. Just ask the girl out and forget about it ?
2. Continue wiht the same reccomaned appraoch for when she keep messaging you after BIYC ?

Of course any other ways or comments are welcome

Pump for a reply