40yrs old challenge in online dating in Asia

[Wierdwolf]

I have utilised The Social Man, Magnetic Lifestyle, David Tian's Invincible, Playing Fire's online texting course and also Chase's One Date...

It will be along story but i put it short so i hope any of you gurus can advise me..

I am able to text my way out from Coffee Meets Bagel, Hinge and also Bumble. Met 50 women in a year after I left a 4 years relationship due to family reasons.

Its Asia and in Singapore, i tried to use Nick Sparks fearless approach, Christian Hudson's Active Value, screening and qualifying by David Tian, building rapport taught by Bobby Rio, SAC by Chase, it seems just leading to no where...

Is screen and qualifying so important that it works? I feel so unnatural when I am bantering because I am making jokes to build emotions and bring the connection using Topical, Personal and Interpersonal from The Social Man... while I am able to actively listen, echo out, like her, partnering in crime for anything, asked for compliance, relegate to arousal and connection. I AM EXHAUSTED by then...

When i begin touch as a reward or being excited, either accidental or to escalate from outer to inner, the woman i see on the 1st date will distant away.

Out of 50 dates, 3 dates were on and 7 were becuz either i did not follow text for 2nd date, it makes me feel the woman is put off that I am closing proximity with her in the first date so I have no validation that I had a great date and I should text her. Is it of culture in Asia or age with experiences in life with age 35 and above that the other 40 women defences are so high ?

I really seek help on this...

 

[Wierdwolf]

Just in case, I forget to add on, these are ladies who stated in the Online App profile they are looking for Long Term, typicial Asian Chinese Singaporean lady... We are not young and cost of living in SG is pretty high, work is also challenging, stressful and unpredictable these days.... So I want to see you gurus view n this, I will not avoid my shortcomings but I need some perspective

 

[Chase]

@Wierdwolf,

Are you autistic? If so, I would aim to simplify my process and make it more repeatable and routines-based. It's probably going to be tough for you having to navigate your way through natural game / natural conversations, which will vary with every girl. You might want to explore building a routine stack -- Mystery Method uses these, Swinggcat uses them (Real World Seduction), Captain Jack used them. Then instead of having to pull information out of women and respond to that organically, you will be more focused on saying the same things every time, and only having to respond to women's responses to what you say (which will tend to fall into the same patterns again and again).

If you're just introverted and socially inexperienced, then I suggest you go and get more real world experience socializing with all kinds of people. Go to parties, join activity groups, sign up for classes, go to bars, go to nightclubs. At first it will feel intimidating and overwhelming, but as you spend more time talking to people you'll figure out more and more of the rules naturally.

Once you have those basic social skills in place, it is going to be much, MUCH easier to talk to women on dates:

Social Skills 101: Basic Social Skills Are 100% Crucial

It doesn’t matter how slick you look or how many great tips you’ve absorbed. Good basic social skills must come first if you wish for social success. This is the first installment in a reboot of our old series on social skills. Social skills are the single most crucial skill set for anyone to...

www.girlschase.com

Chase

 

[Wierdwolf]

@Wierdwolf,

Are you autistic? If so, I would aim to simplify my process and make it more repeatable and routines-based. It's probably going to be tough for you having to navigate your way through natural game / natural conversations, which will vary with every girl. You might want to explore building a routine stack -- Mystery Method uses these, Swinggcat uses them (Real World Seduction), Captain Jack used them. Then instead of having to pull information out of women and respond to that organically, you will be more focused on saying the same things every time, and only having to respond to women's responses to what you say (which will tend to fall into the same patterns again and again).

If you're just introverted and socially inexperienced, then I suggest you go and get more real world experience socializing with all kinds of people. Go to parties, join activity groups, sign up for classes, go to bars, go to nightclubs. At first it will feel intimidating and overwhelming, but as you spend more time talking to people you'll figure out more and more of the rules naturally.

Once you have those basic social skills in place, it is going to be much, MUCH easier to talk to women on dates:

Social Skills 101: Basic Social Skills Are 100% Crucial

It doesn’t matter how slick you look or how many great tips you’ve absorbed. Good basic social skills must come first if you wish for social success. This is the first installment in a reboot of our old series on social skills. Social skills are the single most crucial skill set for anyone to...

www.girlschase.com

Chase

In Western countries, it seems more open and unbounded, but I am referring to female archetypes which Asian women look for long term are a tougher nut to crack.

One example, the physical touch and proximity remains the biggest challenge, because, I use the SAC to discover that similarity is the only way left I can induce investment, I have no green lights from a conservative woman that I can escalate, if I do it, she backs off and the whole ladder collapses... if I hold back, its platonic n will be slow track n you mentioned time intervention will be ur biggest adversary...

But i will take ur advice to go out instead of online dating

 

[Chase]

@Wierdwolf,

In Western countries, it seems more open and unbounded, but I am referring to female archetypes which Asian women look for long term are a tougher nut to crack.

I know what you're getting at.

I would say just for yourself, framing women as "conservative" can be counterproductive.

There are women who are more and less comfortable with the moves you are making.

Your goal is to get them more comfortable.

Get them comfortable enough and how conservative they are or not does not much matter.

One example, the physical touch and proximity remains the biggest challenge, because, I use the SAC to discover that similarity is the only way left I can induce investment, I have no green lights from a conservative woman that I can escalate, if I do it, she backs off and the whole ladder collapses... if I hold back, its platonic n will be slow track n you mentioned time intervention will be ur biggest adversary...

Asian women from Asia generally give much fewer indications they are receptive than women from anywhere else on the planet.

You have to be ready to just LEAD, LEAD, LEAD.

You have to be able to persist a little:

YOU: Come, sit here.​

​

HER: Oh, no, no, no ​

​

YOU: Yes, yes! Come! Sit! [pat seat next to you]​

​

HER: [comes over and sits]​

If you wait around for Asian girls to signal you, you will be waiting until you turn into an old man!

You have to take the lead.

Also: all the normal investment/compliance tech works with Asian girls, same as with any type of girl:

• "I love that dress. Turn around, let me see the back!"
• "That's a really nice bracelet. May I see?" [take her hand, examine]
• "Move over here so you don't get run over."
• "Let's take a seat over here."
• "Tell me about what you do for fun."
• "How's that drink? Let me have a sip; I'm curious!"

Etc.

If you get resistance to it, try adjusting your voice tone and delivery. Makes a huge difference. I have examples on the compliance command tone (voice) in this article that might be useful.

Chase

 

[Skills]

I have utilised The Social Man, Magnetic Lifestyle, David Tian's Invincible, Playing Fire's online texting course and also Chase's One Date...

It will be along story but i put it short so i hope any of you gurus can advise me..

I am able to text my way out from Coffee Meets Bagel, Hinge and also Bumble. Met 50 women in a year after I left a 4 years relationship due to family reasons.

Its Asia and in Singapore, i tried to use Nick Sparks fearless approach, Christian Hudson's Active Value, screening and qualifying by David Tian, building rapport taught by Bobby Rio, SAC by Chase, it seems just leading to no where...

Is screen and qualifying so important that it works? I feel so unnatural when I am bantering because I am making jokes to build emotions and bring the connection using Topical, Personal and Interpersonal from The Social Man... while I am able to actively listen, echo out, like her, partnering in crime for anything, asked for compliance, relegate to arousal and connection. I AM EXHAUSTED by then...

When i begin touch as a reward or being excited, either accidental or to escalate from outer to inner, the woman i see on the 1st date will distant away.

Out of 50 dates, 3 dates were on and 7 were becuz either i did not follow text for 2nd date, it makes me feel the woman is put off that I am closing proximity with her in the first date so I have no validation that I had a great date and I should text her. Is it of culture in Asia or age with experiences in life with age 35 and above that the other 40 women defences are so high ?

I really seek help on this...

Field test my stuff, see if it can help you (or get coaching)...

Basic online structure 101

@Atlas IV asked for a basic structure here ....... I am not going to go into pics, apps, etc.... I will go more over the "structure".... Guys that i seen good at online, we all share kind of identical structure, i know because we were all in underground groups together.... Everyone, knows who...

www.skilledseducer.com

Date Plans - The complete guide on How to date - Dating dynamics 101

Why listen to me on this, well i was never good at dating, i would either do ons or long texting (second gen/grandmaster) setting up sexual encounters or i would replicate what happened in the club a second time by doing a club date (since I am the highest value guy in the dance floor made...

www.skilledseducer.com

 

[Wierdwolf]

Field test my stuff, see if it can help you (or get coaching)...

Basic online structure 101

@Atlas IV asked for a basic structure here ....... I am not going to go into pics, apps, etc.... I will go more over the "structure".... Guys that i seen good at online, we all share kind of identical structure, i know because we were all in underground groups together.... Everyone, knows who...

www.skilledseducer.com

Date Plans - The complete guide on How to date - Dating dynamics 101

Why listen to me on this, well i was never good at dating, i would either do ons or long texting (second gen/grandmaster) setting up sexual encounters or i would replicate what happened in the club a second time by doing a club date (since I am the highest value guy in the dance floor made...

www.skilledseducer.com

Thanks Skills and sorry for the slow response,

I have read through you guide on how to date dating dynamics

Does this applies to Asian context ?

 

[Skills]

Thanks Skills and sorry for the slow response,

I have read through you guide on how to date dating dynamics

Does this applies to Asian context ?

Field test and then you let me know... That is what field testing is for...

 

[Wierdwolf]

Field test and then you let me know... That is what field testing is for...

Ok thanks Skills, i will comply haha

Let me field test in the Asian context, but u need to know I am dealing with a women who are looking for Long Term and in the late 30s and early 40s...

So I am abit unsure if one date can really work if their defences are high, but I will give a shot.

We keep a close watch on this thread. I will create 2 online dating app dates this week..

My strategies when meet, eye contact smile and slow pace talking, add some humour with AFC talk, i will throw Screen & Qualifying with SAC, build rapport by active listening and pause buffer, then this is where I start hawking for IOIs, once its there i will make some incidental touch and I will go for holding hands and physically escalate outer to inner, slow and smooth talking... if she leans over close and touches me, i will lead with your 3 bounce method which is the gameplan.

But i have a mom at home so I am left with a budget hotel or my car...

Once again thanks for showing me the ropes !

 

[Skills]

Ok thanks Skills, i will comply haha

Let me field test in the Asian context, but u need to know I am dealing with a women who are looking for Long Term and in the late 30s and early 40s...

So I am abit unsure if one date can really work if their defences are high, but I will give a shot.

We keep a close watch on this thread. I will create 2 online dating app dates this week..

My strategies when meet, eye contact smile and slow pace talking, add some humour with AFC talk, i will throw Screen & Qualifying with SAC, build rapport by active listening and pause buffer, then this is where I start hawking for IOIs, once its there i will make some incidental touch and I will go for holding hands and physically escalate outer to inner, slow and smooth talking... if she leans over close and touches me, i will lead with your 3 bounce method which is the gameplan.

But i have a mom at home so I am left with a budget hotel or my car...

Once again thanks for showing me the ropes !

Women are women i date from 19-55...