52 attractive traits

[readjusting]

Week 1
Background:
I examined my history, and I didn't get better than one year ago.
Some dates here and there, but I got nothing to show.
So I have a new program. Each week, I will install one attractive trait, that fundamentally change who I am.

After a year, I'll have a new me with 52 attractive traits, and that will make me irresistible to girls.

This week: Be pro-social, and screen out anti-social people

 

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Week 2
Observation:
- It attracts pro-social people (similarity)
- Most pro-social people have a pro-social test.
- It's polarizing. For example, I went on a bus, chatting with the bus driver (pro-social). I noticed that 2 girls on the vacant seat. One girl gave green light, looking at me (this behavior was attractive to her). The other girl gave red light, looking outside the window (this behavior was unattractive to her). I sat next to the green light girl and chatted with her.
Maybe I can go for the aloof girl when I'm level 100, but right now I'm level 3, so right now just be pro-social and attract pro-social people.

This week: Be curious about people

 

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Week 3
New hobby: reading romance novel.
Because I need to know what successful guys look like.

 

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Week 4
Bus.
She looked at me around 3 times. I was pretty sure.
So I changed my seat. Next to her.
Open direct.
Build similarity and conversation.
She asked, “What do you do?”
“It’s a secret,” I said.
She looked attractive. Except with 2 tattoos, and wounds, and a bag of junk.
She might be crazy. I took a mental note to be careful.
I still build rapport as normal.
She pushed the button. She’d get off the next stop.
Propose a coffee date. Grab the number.

This week: Self-improvement oriented
Learn a new skill. I want to put 100 hours in within a month.

 

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Week 5
Full train. Only one empty seat. With a girl.
I captured the seat. The girl smiled. I opened indirect.

She studied Master degree, was a party planner. Independent type. That is the type I prefer.
I chatted a bit, building similarity.
I sensed an escalation window. Maybe a coffee date? BUT the train would be going on for another 40 minutes. Meaning I had to sustain the conversation.
In retrospect, the solution is to escalate on the conversation. Alek’s “explicit content” and sex talk routine. Fractionation. Use it, next time.

Then I disengaged. She reengaged by commenting on the laptop I was working on. Learn that tech.

I suggested a date, she was engaged though. With the middle school sweetheart.

Basically, the order was this:
Small talk > Meaningful talk
I felt like I was in the meaningful talk stage for too long.
Before the invite, there should be an escalate on conversation.

This week: Promotion ladder
My primary mistake is to evaluate with "would I like to hook up with this girl?" first. So I'd fix it by "would you like to have conversation with this girl?"
Same with guys. Conversation first. Friend later.

 

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Week 6
Cold approach
Train.
This girl looked at me. Positive way to get attention.
Okay, I’ll have a conversation with her.

Chatting a bit. Cold read. Now it was time to use Explicit Content!
Her: What do you work?
Me: You look too innocent for it though
Her (laugh): I’m innocent
I didn’t disclose my work (to build intrigue)

40 minutes train. So I was fractionating between chatting with her and working, sex talk and normal talk.

At one point I invited her to my apartment:
Me: Let’s watch a movie at my place
Her: What kind of movie?
Me: Action
Her: Okay

I got her schedule. Exchanging numbers.
Still 15 minutes left until the train arrive.
I took out work, because nothing was left.
Was it? Since women wanted attention, I did need to sustain attention. So occasionally I reengaged the conversation.

Mistake when I got off train. The hopeful look was too obvious. Communicate discretion is key.

Social circle
I did laundry, girl next door came in to took her laundry.
I opened, asking for her name,
She said: “I lived upstairs”
I said, “I lived right next door”
She said, “I heard music from you guys all the time”
That was my neighbor, not me, but I took credit for it. Implied social proof.
Then I touched her a bit, and directing her out.

Basically I want to do flirting game here, with flirting without actually pushing.

This week: Master jealousy
Basically, using jealousy game, and control my own jealousy.
Why I absolutely need to master it:
- It’s a bit hard to pull off, but it works well (medium risk high rewards)
- Not mastering it will lead me into high risk low reward situations (like charging in when a girl with her boyfriend)
- I saw it in every single romance novel
- I saw the natural in my workplace use it
- I'm weak against it

 

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Week 7
Bus.
A girl looking around, then looking down.
She wanted attention.
Approaching, failing.
That was fine.

I was back to my seat, back to work.
Another girl came in next to me. She approached so that was good.
I opened indirectly.
A 20 minutes conversation. Great reaction, she was laughing a lot. So basically if I wanted preselection game then going for girls like this.

Conversation was decent. Deep diving, chase framing, intrigue, banter, were all there.
I noticed I was pretty good at building similarity.
So then for pickup, I only need compliance and arousal.
For arousal, I touched the girl a lot. Calibrating was okay, I started touching after the first banter.

Still having awkward break in conversation, not as much but it was still there.

Mid conversation, I invited her for an adventure. Her objection was that it was dangerous at night.
Meaning the “stranger fear” was there.

On bus I had 50 minutes maximum. With very good rapport I can probably get a girl on instant date.

The only thing that will get me laid right now is preselection game.

This week: Same as last week
I have to pull off a preselection game

 

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Week 8
viewtopic.php?f=5&t=18806

Things are good. Just don’t throw the game.

Also I should start getting investment from girls. Usually I will have to match her investment as well.
That is good. It means we have 2 people interesting in each other (high investment - high investment), rather than being apathetic in each other (low investment- low investment)

This week: Getting investment from people and invest in people.

 

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Week 9
So I only have one 5-minutes interaction at the gym.

What was happening?
- Monday: 2 approaches
- Tuesday: 1 approach
- Wednesday: 0 approach (promised a customer I'd deliver the project that night)
- Thursday: 1 approach
- Friday: 5 approaches
- Saturday: 0 approach
- Sunday: 1 approach

Okay, so the Saturday was problematic. I was going to admit a habit of mine.
I thought I was trash.
The thing is, that statement is true. But it is not useful. Even if it's true it is not helpful.
So from now on I'd be a fixer. Basically a fixer/not a fixer, instead of trash/good.

A couple of benefits:
- Positive mental attitude
- Negative influence tactics does not work on me
- It attracts fixers.
- It allows passive learning. For example, I could sit near couples on the train or bus, and passively learn from them.
Let just says under the premise of fixing my life, learning from competent people will help. A lot.
- Take things less personally.

This week I'll work on that attitude. A couple of ideas:
- Change my desktop screenshot to "I am a fixer"
- Staring at myself in the mirror in the morning and says "I am a fixer"
- I will delete the word "trash" in my head and in my speech. The word "trash" could be easily replaced with a solution or a potential solution.

 

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Week 10
Train.
I kind of picked a seat next to a girl.
She glanced at me. I waited a few seconds, pretending my laptop was not working (denial plausibility), then tapped the girl.
She opened but it wasn’t strong, so a yellow light. I went indirectly.
She had a long response. I had that early advantage, meaning I should push for the close.

This I assumed a tourist identity, because that was the most effective on bus/train.
(Think identity as a small window to my personality. My personality is an amalgam of different things. Each identity is like a small window to peer in it).
In contrast, the office guy identity was terrible on bus/train. Girls (on bus) didn’t like it. On the other hand, runner girls liked it. 3 runner girls, all expressed an initial interest.
Demographic matters.

Doing too much will not cause problem. Showing too much will.
There is a lot of value just by putting myself out there. Even if I watch mindless entertainment on my phone, I still got approach invitations. Tested.
From the perspective of fixing my life, success or failure does not matter. Predicting a success is not possible. Putting myself in an environment where success can happen matters.

I focused my attention on her and did the right eye contact thing.
Touching a lot, at the first close she said not touching her, so I backed off.
Then she was going out but it was a wrong station, I took her seat and locked in.
Then I started deliver the material.
Doing the second close, she said she was too old for me.
Meanwhile a blonde standing nearby was watching us. The preselection was working.
I overcame the objection, said it was kind of sexy. She laughed, we chatted a bit more, then she left.
This girl was chasing during our conversation, so I did try my damn best to close.

The blonde looked at me, I returned eye contact.
Then she stared at me, I didn’t return eye contact, my bad.
I thought, “Come on, blonde. I returned your eye contact, I leave the seat next to me empty. It is so obvious”
I took out the laptop and started working. The blonde turned away.

So this I lacked attainability. However, even more important than attainability was value.

Without the preselection, I lacked value. So I absolutely need preselection as a catalyst.
Every time before I go for a hot girl.

This week: Eye contact

 

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Week 11:
Going on bus. Girl looked at me. She wanted attention
I didn’t put her on the pedestal. I used indirect qualification game with less attractive girls. My theory was that this kind of game will work with attractive girls too.

So I waited a bit, opened with indirect comment “lots of kids today” and she was hooked.

This girl had the “restless legs”, so it would be easy for me to read when she was impatient.

She was an art student. I found out that I had nothing in common.
One day I’ll have time to do art. Or dancing.
She asked what I did in free time, and I used the trademark “You are too innocent for that” line.

A kid was standing, I told him to sit down next to me. Pro social game.
The girl opposites of me looked at me. I smiled at her. She smiled at me. Preselection game.
And I was back to work. I didn’t chase when gaming less attractive girl. It should be the same with more attractive girl.

Then I was back to work. She reengaged, and surprisingly she builds similarity with me.
I asked what she did in free time. Getting a list.
She had restless leg again, must be impatient.
I said, “pretty normal” and pointing at the door.
She actually got off at that stop. I got that right by 100% luck.

She took out a paper, write her number down, and give it to me.

I texted her, she responded to the icebreaker text.

She said she got off at 3:30, I set up at 5. At the end she flaked, saying she didn't want to wait for me.

Two days later, I texted her and set up a date in the weekend. She said okay.
One day later, she texted me with just a "hey." Basically if I responded to this I was chasing, so the best move was calling out. I called out that you don't send a "hey" text to busy people. She backed off, I asked if she was still down, she said she couldn't make it.

I threw the ball into her court.
This week: Presence