7 years of Relationships

[DonGately]

Being a numbers guy, I decide to throw some data in a spreadsheet and look at it for my own amusement, but figured sharing it might be helpful to some.

Over a 7-year period I have picked up 34 younger women that resulted in sexual from day/night/online game, mostly the latter two. So, not included is anyone from social circle, or pre-existing girls/ex-gf/friends to be clear. My preference is to have btw 1-3 girls I am seeing at any time. If I have 3 girls on tap I stop prospecting, just don't have the time.

Each girl was 15-25 years younger than me, normally 20+. I most often used Gentleman Rake/Daddy Dom/Older Man game for obvious reasons but not 100% of the time.

Far majority of the girls would be described as beautiful, fit, white college girls but I do not discriminate based on race: there were AA, asian, hispanic, mideast, and 1 Native American girl in there. All of them were intelligent or I don't bother, and that's pretty easy to parse online, in a bar while drinking it can take a bit but you can always tell if you look for it. And 2 of them were strippers - a 19yr old AA chick and a 24yr white brunette with a 10 body.

Out of 34 successful pickups, 14 ended up being ONS either due to me not wanting to see them again or them ghosting. Some of these girls I did not contact again either due to them displaying stalkerish behavior, or getting too emotional with me right away. Better to cut that off immediately, even if the sex was great.

10 girls I saw post-sex, but for less than 3 months. Probably 50-50 why it didn't last longer, could have been geographically inconvenient, sex getting stale, bad personality or whatever reason they had - some clearly found someone 'serious.' Sometimes it'd go great for a month and then things would....get weird? The craziness would start to leak out.

That leaves 10 that became actual 'relationships' in my mind. 5 lasted 3-6 months and 5 lasted over 6 months. 2 of them were regular sexual partners for over 2-3 years. 1 was off and on for many years before ending up as a true friend, this is the longest one.

I will write more but I want to think further on how and what to say about them.


edit: remembered two more girls, a ONS and a 2NS.

 

[KJ Francis]

this is sweet!! it reminds me of those waterfall graphs you see people make for their budgets lol

you just reminded me I actually spent a good 1-1.5 years adjusting my calendar event end date times. so I could technically export it to a spreadsheet and calculate date conversion to lay, the number of hours spent with every girl, retention lengths, etc. I probably won't get around to it.

I wonder what seducer sample size we would need to do a good regression analysis on number of orgasms to months retained haha, just kidding

 

[KJ Francis]

Don you have inspired me! I exported and cleaned the data.

Over two years - went out with 65 women and laid 27.

42% date to lay conversion. I may start another thread with more analysis. Thank you for the reminder.

 

[Chase]

Great set of stats, @DonGately!

 

[topcat]

Sweet.

Between 2015 and now i fucked 159 girls. 45 of those became fb’s (meaning i fucked them more than twice). 3 became MLTR’s (meaning i took a particular liking to them and displayed greater emotional and time investment with them over a > 6 month period). Total count is 164 but 5 of those were before i discovered GC and seduction so not really counting them..

Not sure on date to lay ratio but it has increased severely over the past 3 years. This year i fucked 17/18 dates. The 1 I didn’t fuck gave me resistance so I let her go.

Majority of these are online. 5 daygame. Of the 5 pre seduction 4 were via social circle, 1 introduced in a foursome, and 1 night gamer in there.

152/164 laid on the first date.

 

[KJ Francis]

Sweet.

Between 2015 and now i fucked 159 girls. 45 of those became fb’s (meaning i fucked them more than twice). 3 became MLTR’s (meaning i took a particular liking to them and displayed greater emotional and time investment with them over a > 6 month period). Total count is 164 but 5 of those were before i discovered GC and seduction so not really counting them..

Not sure on date to lay ratio but it has increased severely over the past 3 years. This year i fucked 17/18 dates. The 1 I didn’t fuck gave me resistance so I let her go.

Majority of these are online. 5 daygame. The of the 5 pre seduction 4 were via social circle, 1 introduced in a foursome, and 1 night gamer in there.

152/169 laid on the first date.

that's unreal. I split 2023/2024... went from 30% to 60%

met way more in 2023. one girl took a lot of hours up in 2024

gonna be so distracted tomorrow with this lol

 

[Swati]

I started the "game" journey in March 2021, from 2021-2024 I got 68 lays, mostly from night games 52%, others were day game and online, maybe 2 social circle...?

Around 8% were 2/2.5 dates I closed. I NEVER was able to get a lay if I didn't close on the 2nd date, it's usually because I had a window to close but fumbled it.

15 I retained because I wanted to, there were a lot more that I didn't want to see again

I lost beautiful girls because my retention and LTR weren't good or just numb to the fact that "new" pussy was more attractive to me than

around 65% were all under 25

 

[Higher]

@DonGately, @topcat, @Swati very inspiring numbers!

Would love to hear more about y'all's process if u didnt share details already - just went again thru this post by DWW and always find it super informative.

Eg. @DonGately what do u mean with "Gentleman Rake/Daddy Dom/Older Man"? How does this type of game look like, especially in relation to daygame?

 

[KJ Francis]

ok more numbers... I've got 44 lifetime lays. 27 became fwb, which is 61% retention.

37 of 44 were first date lay, which is 84%

Last two years was 27 lays. 17 became fwb, which is 63% retention
but removing girls while traveling, it is 17/22, which is 77% retention

22/27 were first date lay, which is 81%

9/27 retained to date, which is 33%
edit: 9/22 non-traveling, which is 41% currently retained

 

[POB]

Stopped counting around 2017-1018, but it was close to 200 lays by that time.
Started this journey late, at 32, so got to those numbers around the 6-7 year mark.
80% from online and 20% from night/social.
Basically 2 new chicks per month on average (one time it was 2 per week...crazy days).
(side note: Those numbers are heavily skewed by years 2 and 3 where I was on a mission to fuck as many chicks as humanly possible.
Quality dropped of course during those fuckaton years.)

Right around year four I had a fixed rotation of 3-4 chicks that I was constantly replacing as they dropped my ass.
Also had a five year MLTR that met when she was 21-22yo, and some light MLTRs that I kept around for a while.
One of them almost proposed to me because she was really in love...still very fond of our time together, she was def wife material.

Right now I have no idea what my lay count is looking like, because I slowed down a lot and don't care about building a rotation anymore.
Still getting decent action from online, social and night though, especially after my split last year.

P.S. also got lucky because I caught the last bit of the tinder frenzy, where basically everything you said to a match that was not moronic or retarded led to a lay if you had decent pictures.

 

[DonGately]

The 5 girls I saw for over 3 months but less than 6 ended for different reasons, although I'd say that the most common was that they were in my rotation and just slowly slid out of it. Like, even 3 girls for me takes a ton of energy with a high-powered job, seeing my male friends, doing my hobbies, any travel, etc. Generally, I saw these girls only during the week, so a late Wed night with drinks, dinner, lots of sex could completely wear me out the entire next day.

I will also say this was probably a mistake on my part. With a little extra effort, I could have kept banging them once in a while - and one Euro stacked blonde submissive I definitely did - but others I regretted not putting in the effort. You just get lazy sometimes. Then a few months later you'd like to see them again but it's too late. And none of these girls I saw for 3+ months were difficult, bitchy, or anything of the sort nor did they ever ask for a 'real' relationship. They knew I wasn't going to be that guy for them.

One woman, who was 25 and worked as an EMT strangely ghosted me. She was very kinky and loved impact play, we had amazing sex every time. I spanked her with wooden paddles, plastic ones with the holes in the middle, whipped her ass, think she was the first girl I used a cane on. I also tied her up in hogties, armbinders, leg spreaders, etc. The last time I saw her I triple penetrated her and gave her 'the best orgasm of my life!'

Literally never heard from her again. I had two thoughts about this:
1) she was falling for me, perhaps, and knew I wouldn't reciprocate.
or
2) while we did lots of spanking, I wasn't doing it *hard* enough. It sounds funny because it sure seemed like I was doing it with the proper amount of force, but there are girls out there who want to be paddled black and blue, can't sit down easily for a few days without wincing types.
I actually think 2] was the answer here after much thought. For girls who like it really rough*, there is no substitute. Just like guys who love getting head won't be with a girl who won't do it.

Another one was a former fashion model of E.E. heritage, killer smile, who had moved on to an office job [modeling is a very young woman's game ], she was 24 iirc, had gotten really good implants to boot. She was very submissive, kinda gothy, and kinky, and was a total no-drama girl. I'd meet her at her apt in the suburbs after work, we'd drink and order pizza, and she'd do whatever I wanted but would fall asleep immediately after orgasm, every time. Slightly hilarious, that. The sex was the 'you tell me what to do and in what position' type, otherwise she'd be passive. We still msg on IG from time to time but I haven't slept with her in a long time now. Pretty certain she'd be down though.

In fact, most of the girls I decided to stop seeing after some months/years wanted to stay in touch with me. As these online friendships take virtually no time it's fine with me for the most part. One has even gotten married twice since I dropped her, which is why I did so. I'm not in the game to collect hearts.


*I had two girls I picked up in diff cities ask me to hit them in the face, not slap, during foreplay. I refused. Both were really pretty and about half my size. One of them kept trying to convince me 'it's fine!' and 'I work from home, nobody will see if I have a black eye.' Not for me, no thank you. I left.

 

[KJ Francis]

Thanks for sharing, @DonGately

I've always found you to be one of the most interesting posters here. It is a fascinating and rare look inside this type of life. Can I ask what you personally get out of impact play from the male perspective, and if/why that is something you need in order to maintain that as one of your relationships?

I don't like getting insights from random unknowns on reddit or whatever. The stories I've heard through my own life are mainly via girls about guys who are unhappy with their lives and have a lot of anger to let out. The girls they're with are normally pretty drug addled, and everyone involved was pretty unsuccessful professionally. Lots of frustration involved in their personalities.

And it seems that's not the case for you. So I would be very interested in reading more if you choose to delve deeper into the topic of your relationships and what you've gotten out of the experiences.

 

[DonGately]

A note on submission - these girls I mention are submissive in private, not necessarily in public. If you're out with a lawyer who has to be 'on' all day professionally and you meet for happy hour, she's probably going to still be her hard-driving, type A personality. I'm not asking them to duck their head and walk 5 feet behind me in public, as amusing as that might be to try.

Frankly, I like a girl who can dish it out in a humorous fashion as well as take it. I certainly call girls on their BS 95% of the time. If she thinks I'm talking nonsense she should tell me so I can re-assess both my opinion of her as well as of what I was saying.

Just an extended way of saying I'm not attracted to doormats, quite the opposite. My experience is that fiercely intelligent girls are absolutely wild in bed and very curious to try new things. And rarely do they get to meet a guy who's their match in both areas.

 

[KJ Francis]

 

[DonGately]

Thanks for sharing, @DonGately

I've always found you to be one of the most interesting posters here. It is a fascinating and rare look inside this type of life. Can I ask what you personally get out of impact play from the male perspective, and if/why that is something you need in order to maintain that as one of your relationships?

I'd say I always knew deep inside I was kinky and attracted to D/s relationships, but it took me until I was about mid-late 30s to be honest with myself, and with my partners, that's who I was and what I wanted, all the time in bed. Not surprisingly my success rate with pick-up and gaining sexual access to hot, younger women also improved greatly around that time. Esp college girls.

Congruence is quite powerful -- I look like a successful, older businessman who wears expensive suits so it's natural for me to attract those younger women looking for a guy like me they can submit to behind closed doors, who they correctly assume is better in bed than a frat boy.

The truth is simply that 90% of our desire for impact play starts with them suggesting it. They like being spanked. It turns them on, sometimes massively so. Some enjoy being slapped. I'm not saying I don't enjoy it, of course I enjoy having a sorority girl bent over my knees naked, or skirt down, while I spank her. And it's obviously a lead-up to sex, I'm not one of those guys in the kink world that just does these kinds of scenes but without sex. I think the unspoken, subconscious part of it is that now they feel they must do what they're told/submit or ....be punished. It gets them wet. They get endorphins from pain as well as pleasure. Both at the same time can be quite powerful.

The 10k foot view is that they want to be told they are 'bad' somehow, they want to be spanked, they want to get on their knees for you, they want to be told what to do, they want to submit. They can deny it's what they were asking for while they were begging for it all along. And I'm sure it feels taboo for many of them, as I'm not in their social circles their 'misbehavior' will never be told to anyone. They may truly feel this way or it could just be a role they are inhabiting for me.

As shown in your trailer above, that applies regardless of age, but it feels more natural [to them] for a 21yr old to act that way with a 40+ year old. I wouldn't say I 'need' it but I do enjoy it. And it's the natural lead-in to kinkier behaviors. Some girls aren't into impact play [or nothing more than a light spanking,] but are into bondage, hot wax, role-play, collars, toys, gags, choking or watersports.

 

[DonGately]

The last group of 5 were the ones I had the longest relationships with: 6 months to 3+ years. 3 had a definite start and finish to them, 2 continued as a FWB that dwindled over time. Only one of them is still local and we still see each other for drinks/dinners although not sexually.

2 redheads, 2 brunettes, one blonde. 2 were fashion models when we met, both 21. 2 were 19 and the oldest one was 25/26 when we met. Both fashion models were extremely intelligent, in fact the taller one might have been the smartest on this entire list, she went to an engineering school. One of 19yr olds was getting her engineering degree from a diff school, we had a 3 year relationship until she graduated. The other 19yr old went to a top 5 liberal arts college. They were a mix of tall, [the models] medium and petite. All were very fit, one was a track athlete as well.

It may not surprise you that these girls were most of the very hottest girls I spent time with. I don't know if that's why I spent so much time with them but it doesn't hurt. But there's certainly much more to it.
[The hottest girl on my list was a ONS half-asian who turned out to be a total flake. She turned me on so much while we were having sex I was doing the 'I can't believe I'm having sex with her!' thing in my head lol. I also had 2 dates with 2 10s and failed to close both, sigh.]

I generally follow a 2-date pattern unless I'm getting green lights, as I did from the nordic blonde girl. However, the 3 best looking of the 5 all took 3+ dates to close, fwiw. One girl even told me on date 2 she would sleep with me, but not until a couple more dates, lol. She also said she was incredibly amazing in bed and she was right. I suspect some of this is due to their youth [specifically afraid of being pump and dumped by a high value man], most women I slept with 24-29 were 1-2 dates no problem.

Aside from being very attractive, what else about these girls worked for me? I've already mentioned the intelligence. All of them were kinky, most of them very much so. All of them were submissive. My first sexual encounter with one of them we ended up at her place and she said, 'Please spank me and I'll do whatever you want!'

Another one, 21, had kinkier limits than I did. Both of the 19yr olds were down for anything, very curious to learn and try new things - hogtie, anal, electro-stim. They all loved bondage. They all enjoyed impact play. Some of them were very much into getting x-rated photos taken of them, but some didn't want any taken. A couple of them were down for 3somes. They all liked using toys and owned their own as well. I'd say at least 3 of them were monogamous the whole time we were together, not that that was a requirement for me. 4/5 really, truly enjoyed giving head.

None of them seemed to have any 'daddy' issues even if they liked to call me that in private, never in public of course. In fact, I'd say most of them had excellent relationships with their fathers from what could be observed/heard from the outside. [Some of the girls mentioned above def not the case.]
None of them expected nor asked me to give them money for any reason -- sometimes I did so they could get their nails/waxing done but I offered those. They got to enjoy my lifestyle by just showing up and being smart, sexy, well-dressed, and pleasant to be with. None of them seemed to have the least amount of interest in guys their own age, comments were also made about college guys mostly being terrible in bed.

Chloe, 19 when we met, fell in love with me. [All names changed etc] Not right away of course. But we had the most traditional dating life, relative to the others. She was the only one that was invited to my house. [The rest were at hotels or their place, I got a lot of hotel discounts and free rooms over the years]. We took vacations together, saw the opera, the orchestra.
She was funny, whip-smart, and had an amazing laugh. Chloe was, without a doubt, the sexiest girl I have ever spent time with - she had amazing curves and flat stomach and elite bedroom eyes. Not only that, she was the most talented in the bedroom. One time I even asked her about it and she said her prior college bf and her would have sex 3x a day for 1.5 years. 'Practice, practice, practice,' she giggled. I was lucky enough to be the next guy she dated. She was also the only one I'd regularly see 2x a week, a weeknight and a weekend day/night normally. Btw school and sorority duties, and other activities that was the most we could have met anyway at the time.

I had the biggest crush on Chloe. It was probably the sex, it wasn't love. She always wanted sex 3x a day or night from me also, which certainly cut back on my drinking. And honestly, dating these girls made me get in better shape as I was sliding towards that 'office executive' shape. Lucky for me I'm 6' tall and can get in good shape pretty quickly on the treadmill, basketball plus heavy lifting. I'm certainly not ripped but I look good naked, at least according to them. Not only was she kinky, submissive, incredibly skilled, a fit athlete but she could come in less than 5 minutes, on average, once inside her.

Since no one is perfect, she was also the most difficult to handle, much of that coming from simply being so young and brilliantly educated. I don't mean she was bitchy a lot - def not the case or I wouldn't have bothered after a few weeks - but a good example of sometimes young women don't even know what they want out of life. She was generally very sweet, not just to me but to the people around her. Chloe was also the only one who might start stroking my cock under the table at a Michelin-starred restaurant, with her foot. She could also be possessive of me, if we met other pretty girls I knew out on the town, whether friends, ex-gfs or coworkers, she make sure to fuck my brains out before bed, no matter how late we got back, begging me to come inside her or sometimes on her face [used birth control obvs].

So what went wrong, you may ask. Simple, the main issue with dating college or grad school girls you want to keep around [all 5 of these were when we met] is that they eventually graduate. She was planning to move a couple hundred miles away and I don't do long-distance. I had to break it off. She was really hurt by it but there was no other way. She cut off all contact, for a while, I didn't think I'd ever hear from her again but she ended up staying in town longer than expected [I think the job fell through] and we became good friends. We'd still go out on the town with her as great social proof, I'd often ask her to drink with me while waiting for an online date to show up [double-book dates!]. We remained in contact for years after she left and I met her in her city when I went there for a March Madness game but we no longer talk.


Ps I am writing mainly for my own benefit, of course I want others to learn whatever they can and avoid self-limiting beliefs I see so often in middle-aged guys with lots to offer. I've been thinking about writing a thinly fictionalized memoir of these years and trying to decide if its worth the time and effort to do so. Ironicially, one of the girls I've mentioned itt has published an actual memoir of her years in fashion industry and it is quite good. Short working lifespan for models, that's for sure.

 

[DonGately]

You can become a winner only if you are willing to walk over the edge. ~ Damon Runyon