Not practicing for a while deteriorated my game. I had a little AA again and couldn't maintain the right vibe. But it got better!
8/7 University Campus
I'm looking pretty sexy with my white button down and seashell necklace. But it's hard to approach.
Girl 1: sitting down. I approach after some time. We make some conversation about where she's from and where I am from. I try to be a little flirty when they ask where I'm from (nobody has ever heard of the country) and say "Can you guess?" We talk some more but I am a bit clumsy and she's isn't going for it. At the end she says, "Thanks for coming up to me, that took courage" so I guess that I was radiating nervousness. Damn.
To improve on: just approach, don't think twice
Girl 2: cute blonde sitting down with a fit body. I approach and am much better but still a little excited and clunky. So that the conversation stalls occasionally. However, she likes me enough that it doesn't get too awkward. She says that she is waiting for a friend and I say" While you're waiting, come take a walk with me" She resists but I persist. I take her hand and try to pull her up but she again resists. I am defeated but I don't want to walk away. I can't sit down either because then she would have more power. So I just stand there while her friend pulls up and we part.
To improve on: be more commanding
Girl 3: Inside building. girl sitting down studying with headphones in. I approach but she is obviously uncomfortable and terminates with "Well, I have to study" I'VE NOTICED SOMETHING!!! When people want to get rid of you in a polite but passive assertive way they will use the transition word "well" in front of their statement.
8/8 University Campus
Feeling better today but still combating some AA. In my same sexy getup from yesterday.
Girl 1: she walks past me, stylish Asian. I decide to walk back and fight my weaker habits. I think she might have known that i was following her because my boots are loud. Another reason to just approach quicker. We walk and talk and I always try to walk close to her and be in her personal space. She is still not very responsive and even asks me "What?" I need to speak up. I do get the number but she didn't seem that excited about giving it. However, I did do good in staying silent and letting her form her own conclusion when I asked and not pressing her. Something I learned from NarrowJ.
To improve on: just approach the first time when you see her, more commanding, less friendly, speak up
Girl 2: walking towards me, I wave her over. she is flattered. She tries to end the conversation by saying that she has to get to class but I just walk with her. We talk and we get on well but early into the conversation she says "This is kinda freaking me out" I say "Why?" instead of ignoring it because I'm intrigued as to what I'm doing wrong. But, of course, she doesn't fully understand why and just says "you just keep looking at me" I say "It's eye contact. How I was brought up" (totally not true but trying to not get her to feel superior to me by implying that I was raised right and she wasn't. Too much of a neg? Anyway, didn't really affect anything.) I take this question as a signal to start deep diving because she is not fully comfortable around me. We do and before we part I try to get number. she responds with email. I say no. Learned my lesson from the other girl but it's not as strong this time and she get my number with I'm sure what will be an unfulfilled promise to call me.
To improve on: persist with number (she's traveling for a month so that's why the date was out), deep dive sooner
Girl 3: first black girl in months (not attracted to them usually). I say that she has great style. She says that I do too. Very good feedback concerning my fashion! I sit down next to her (sitting down is always a tough transition for me, usually feels a little awkward). The way she is sitting is strange because she is next to but not turned to me. I keep talking expecting her to turn and she does a little. I expect if we had more time, she would have turned more. But the conversation has no tension and we part when her mom appears.
To improve on: come off sexier
Girl 4: tall girl. I approach and she that she is not that attractive in the middle of it and say that she has cute hair. But she is being quite flirty with me (nice change, these clothes must be doing something) I am not acting very sexy but still get number and agree to meet up later. This might be a good friend candidate.
To improve on: sexier
Girl 5: little thing walking towards me. I see that she is a little meek so I disarm myself. FATAL MOVE. In doing so, I became a boring nice guy, not interesting and insincere with my questions.
To improve on: don't disarm yourself of edge, sexiness, and dominance
Girl 6: I'm sitting down cause my tight pants and boots tire me out to walk in. A cute girl walks up. I try to practice getting her to come to me but screw it up royally. She must be slightly experienced because she tells me to have a good day. I realize that this failed because I wasn't dominant enough. AND THEN IT HITS ME WITH THIS GIRL AND THE OTHERS BEFORE: sexiness = dominance. Put more power and control in a situation and you will be sexier and more attractive. I also realized that I had been in a supplicatory mindset all day in trying to grant satisfaction to others when I should have been thinking will this person be worth my time and effort? On this realization and my anger at my despondency (I get into bad funks sometimes when I fail with girls) I rise with the thought that my girlfriend might be out there somewhere so I should get my ass up and get her.
To improve on: sexiness? Not quite. Dominance. Control. POWER.
Girl 7: cute short blonde. She instantly responds and when I shake her hand, neither her nor I let go until she starts to walk again. Her rack is great and I need to resist the urge to just dive my face in. Norweigean girls. We get along swimmingly and she agrees to an exact time and place to meet up. Still a little clunky with my convo but hey, that's allright. My one mistake is after we agree to the date, she tries to say goodbye but I'll be damned if SHE ends this conversation. So it gets a little clunky as I try to continue on the excuse to help her find her car. It was right there in front of us. We hug goodbye and I remember still extending my arms for a split second first before hugging. Just be a man, do what you want, and hug the girl who obviously likes you!
To improve on: smoother conversation, hug instantly, learn to end conversation
Summary: Dominance and power is paramount. Act commandingly, slightly demandingly, but compassionately. THAT IS HOW TO BE SEXY BUT WARM, MANLY BUT COMPASSIONATE. I FIGURED IT OUT!!!
8/7 University Campus
I'm looking pretty sexy with my white button down and seashell necklace. But it's hard to approach.
Girl 1: sitting down. I approach after some time. We make some conversation about where she's from and where I am from. I try to be a little flirty when they ask where I'm from (nobody has ever heard of the country) and say "Can you guess?" We talk some more but I am a bit clumsy and she's isn't going for it. At the end she says, "Thanks for coming up to me, that took courage" so I guess that I was radiating nervousness. Damn.
To improve on: just approach, don't think twice
Girl 2: cute blonde sitting down with a fit body. I approach and am much better but still a little excited and clunky. So that the conversation stalls occasionally. However, she likes me enough that it doesn't get too awkward. She says that she is waiting for a friend and I say" While you're waiting, come take a walk with me" She resists but I persist. I take her hand and try to pull her up but she again resists. I am defeated but I don't want to walk away. I can't sit down either because then she would have more power. So I just stand there while her friend pulls up and we part.
To improve on: be more commanding
Girl 3: Inside building. girl sitting down studying with headphones in. I approach but she is obviously uncomfortable and terminates with "Well, I have to study" I'VE NOTICED SOMETHING!!! When people want to get rid of you in a polite but passive assertive way they will use the transition word "well" in front of their statement.
8/8 University Campus
Feeling better today but still combating some AA. In my same sexy getup from yesterday.
Girl 1: she walks past me, stylish Asian. I decide to walk back and fight my weaker habits. I think she might have known that i was following her because my boots are loud. Another reason to just approach quicker. We walk and talk and I always try to walk close to her and be in her personal space. She is still not very responsive and even asks me "What?" I need to speak up. I do get the number but she didn't seem that excited about giving it. However, I did do good in staying silent and letting her form her own conclusion when I asked and not pressing her. Something I learned from NarrowJ.
To improve on: just approach the first time when you see her, more commanding, less friendly, speak up
Girl 2: walking towards me, I wave her over. she is flattered. She tries to end the conversation by saying that she has to get to class but I just walk with her. We talk and we get on well but early into the conversation she says "This is kinda freaking me out" I say "Why?" instead of ignoring it because I'm intrigued as to what I'm doing wrong. But, of course, she doesn't fully understand why and just says "you just keep looking at me" I say "It's eye contact. How I was brought up" (totally not true but trying to not get her to feel superior to me by implying that I was raised right and she wasn't. Too much of a neg? Anyway, didn't really affect anything.) I take this question as a signal to start deep diving because she is not fully comfortable around me. We do and before we part I try to get number. she responds with email. I say no. Learned my lesson from the other girl but it's not as strong this time and she get my number with I'm sure what will be an unfulfilled promise to call me.
To improve on: persist with number (she's traveling for a month so that's why the date was out), deep dive sooner
Girl 3: first black girl in months (not attracted to them usually). I say that she has great style. She says that I do too. Very good feedback concerning my fashion! I sit down next to her (sitting down is always a tough transition for me, usually feels a little awkward). The way she is sitting is strange because she is next to but not turned to me. I keep talking expecting her to turn and she does a little. I expect if we had more time, she would have turned more. But the conversation has no tension and we part when her mom appears.
To improve on: come off sexier
Girl 4: tall girl. I approach and she that she is not that attractive in the middle of it and say that she has cute hair. But she is being quite flirty with me (nice change, these clothes must be doing something) I am not acting very sexy but still get number and agree to meet up later. This might be a good friend candidate.
To improve on: sexier
Girl 5: little thing walking towards me. I see that she is a little meek so I disarm myself. FATAL MOVE. In doing so, I became a boring nice guy, not interesting and insincere with my questions.
To improve on: don't disarm yourself of edge, sexiness, and dominance
Girl 6: I'm sitting down cause my tight pants and boots tire me out to walk in. A cute girl walks up. I try to practice getting her to come to me but screw it up royally. She must be slightly experienced because she tells me to have a good day. I realize that this failed because I wasn't dominant enough. AND THEN IT HITS ME WITH THIS GIRL AND THE OTHERS BEFORE: sexiness = dominance. Put more power and control in a situation and you will be sexier and more attractive. I also realized that I had been in a supplicatory mindset all day in trying to grant satisfaction to others when I should have been thinking will this person be worth my time and effort? On this realization and my anger at my despondency (I get into bad funks sometimes when I fail with girls) I rise with the thought that my girlfriend might be out there somewhere so I should get my ass up and get her.
To improve on: sexiness? Not quite. Dominance. Control. POWER.
Girl 7: cute short blonde. She instantly responds and when I shake her hand, neither her nor I let go until she starts to walk again. Her rack is great and I need to resist the urge to just dive my face in. Norweigean girls. We get along swimmingly and she agrees to an exact time and place to meet up. Still a little clunky with my convo but hey, that's allright. My one mistake is after we agree to the date, she tries to say goodbye but I'll be damned if SHE ends this conversation. So it gets a little clunky as I try to continue on the excuse to help her find her car. It was right there in front of us. We hug goodbye and I remember still extending my arms for a split second first before hugging. Just be a man, do what you want, and hug the girl who obviously likes you!
To improve on: smoother conversation, hug instantly, learn to end conversation
Summary: Dominance and power is paramount. Act commandingly, slightly demandingly, but compassionately. THAT IS HOW TO BE SEXY BUT WARM, MANLY BUT COMPASSIONATE. I FIGURED IT OUT!!!
Have never used the quizzical look/pause to a strong counter-offer before, only the hmmmm I don't know types.