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- Oct 12, 2018
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Ancient Lay: this post has been rated a "Ancient Lay post" by forum members
Hey fellas, I'm bored and want to write a FR for something that happened a few years back. It was an interesting experience.
There was a chick who grew a crush on me in 5th grade, and stayed obsessed with me for so long, almost a decade.
I'll call her Yuffie.
About a year after high school ended, Yuffie finally started making moves to talk with me. She added me on Snapchat and we started chatting.
At first, I empathized with her oneitis and my goal was to "free" her
.
I literally was talking to her about sprezzatura and stuff lol, and how she could change herself socially and she was like "oh crap, I never thought about it like that!"
I was just nudging her in the direction of meeting other guys and that I wasn't shit lmao.
But... she was still madly in love.
At some point I said screw it, I might be down to get with this girl (she is physically quite attractive, just was horribly insecure and ultra nervous around me specifically).
At the time I didn't have much chance at getting with other girls due to my situation, so I thought I can get some great experience with sex with her.
We met up. She looked cute. We had a refreshing conversation but at the end I was just like... nah. I didn't feel it.
Met up with her a second time though, this time I pulled her in for a smooch.
I was her first kiss!
Ah crap.
She kinda lost her mind a bit and was like "oh my god. DUDE! I've been obsessed with you for like 10 years!"
And I said "I know..."
Yuffie laid out the whole story to me, told me everything and I just sat and listened. I made it clear once again, I just wasn't a relationship guy. Then we watched a bit of anime.
Some more stuff happened. I was kind of a dick, was a little too cold. But eventually we both communicated clearly that it was casual and I said if two people desire each other they shouldn't feel judged getting together, and she agreed and said she wanted "intimacy" I think.
And we ended up sleeping with each other.
I guided her through everything and in general was a pretty cool and swell guy (but I wasn't that cool of a guy-- I was kinda going through a rough patch in life and didn't have that much space for empathy for her. I could've treated her better and more gently).
Anyway.
There are some unique and interesting things about this experience with Yuffie.
First--
I don't think I should've had that casual relationship with er.
She was SO insecure and had so much blame. Her personality was really lame. I think her insecurity and bad attitude rubbed off on me a bit (though we did have some nice conversations).
I was kind of an ass in how I ended things with Yuffie (she had no friends, a lame family, bad attitudes-- I should've been way more gentle, less cold)... and in my life, a couple years later, *I* then got this crazy limerence for someone (I have NEVER fallen for a woman that quickly) and she could not get out of my fucking mind, even though I didn't want a relationship with her and there were other girls in my life and I kept letting all the emotions go.
I really believe whatever strange spiritual chemical makeup Yuffie had that made her obsessed with me rubbed off on me, and I paid the price by getting obsessed with another girl (who was similar to Yuffie-- very artistic, weird, hippie spiritual, except THIS girl was WAY more confident and social and sexier. Though, I would say she's less good looking than Yuffie, funnily).
Karma, karma, karma.
So yes.
I recommend having relationships only with kickass and confident and awesome women, even if it's just casual.
Second--
This one is fascinating.
When Yuffie told me everything about why she loved me so much, and what she saw in me, and how she believed I was... she was spot in in a lot of ways!
The traits she described in me were how I saw myself-- things that I was proud of. She described some of the core philosophies I had, my values, how she believed I saw the world... and I was like "wtf! You're correct about almost all of this..."
I had literally talked to this girl like 3 times in those ~9 years before we actually got together! And somehow she knew who I was...
I didn't even have social media where she could've stalked me. She wasn't friends with ANY of my friends, and didn't know anyone like me at all really. It was all just her observing me in school. Fucking crazy.
But there was one key thing missing in her perception of me:
She saw none of the flaws.
...
Yuppppp.
I hope she's doing good, whatever point she's at in life.
Sometimes one does have to wonder about how our hearts and minds latch onto people (but I still believe romance/sex has a real practical aspect-- maintaining abundance and upgrading yourself and such).
There are so many stories out there of people's experiences. Life is fascinating.
There was a chick who grew a crush on me in 5th grade, and stayed obsessed with me for so long, almost a decade.
I'll call her Yuffie.
About a year after high school ended, Yuffie finally started making moves to talk with me. She added me on Snapchat and we started chatting.
At first, I empathized with her oneitis and my goal was to "free" her
.I literally was talking to her about sprezzatura and stuff lol, and how she could change herself socially and she was like "oh crap, I never thought about it like that!"
I was just nudging her in the direction of meeting other guys and that I wasn't shit lmao.
But... she was still madly in love.
At some point I said screw it, I might be down to get with this girl (she is physically quite attractive, just was horribly insecure and ultra nervous around me specifically).
At the time I didn't have much chance at getting with other girls due to my situation, so I thought I can get some great experience with sex with her.
We met up. She looked cute. We had a refreshing conversation but at the end I was just like... nah. I didn't feel it.
Met up with her a second time though, this time I pulled her in for a smooch.
I was her first kiss!
Ah crap.
She kinda lost her mind a bit and was like "oh my god. DUDE! I've been obsessed with you for like 10 years!"
And I said "I know..."
Yuffie laid out the whole story to me, told me everything and I just sat and listened. I made it clear once again, I just wasn't a relationship guy. Then we watched a bit of anime.
Some more stuff happened. I was kind of a dick, was a little too cold. But eventually we both communicated clearly that it was casual and I said if two people desire each other they shouldn't feel judged getting together, and she agreed and said she wanted "intimacy" I think.
And we ended up sleeping with each other.
I guided her through everything and in general was a pretty cool and swell guy (but I wasn't that cool of a guy-- I was kinda going through a rough patch in life and didn't have that much space for empathy for her. I could've treated her better and more gently).
Anyway.
There are some unique and interesting things about this experience with Yuffie.
First--
I don't think I should've had that casual relationship with er.
She was SO insecure and had so much blame. Her personality was really lame. I think her insecurity and bad attitude rubbed off on me a bit (though we did have some nice conversations).
I was kind of an ass in how I ended things with Yuffie (she had no friends, a lame family, bad attitudes-- I should've been way more gentle, less cold)... and in my life, a couple years later, *I* then got this crazy limerence for someone (I have NEVER fallen for a woman that quickly) and she could not get out of my fucking mind, even though I didn't want a relationship with her and there were other girls in my life and I kept letting all the emotions go.
I really believe whatever strange spiritual chemical makeup Yuffie had that made her obsessed with me rubbed off on me, and I paid the price by getting obsessed with another girl (who was similar to Yuffie-- very artistic, weird, hippie spiritual, except THIS girl was WAY more confident and social and sexier. Though, I would say she's less good looking than Yuffie, funnily).
Karma, karma, karma.
So yes.
I recommend having relationships only with kickass and confident and awesome women, even if it's just casual.
Second--
This one is fascinating.
When Yuffie told me everything about why she loved me so much, and what she saw in me, and how she believed I was... she was spot in in a lot of ways!
The traits she described in me were how I saw myself-- things that I was proud of. She described some of the core philosophies I had, my values, how she believed I saw the world... and I was like "wtf! You're correct about almost all of this..."
I had literally talked to this girl like 3 times in those ~9 years before we actually got together! And somehow she knew who I was...
I didn't even have social media where she could've stalked me. She wasn't friends with ANY of my friends, and didn't know anyone like me at all really. It was all just her observing me in school. Fucking crazy.
But there was one key thing missing in her perception of me:
She saw none of the flaws.
...
Yuppppp.
I hope she's doing good, whatever point she's at in life.
Sometimes one does have to wonder about how our hearts and minds latch onto people (but I still believe romance/sex has a real practical aspect-- maintaining abundance and upgrading yourself and such).
There are so many stories out there of people's experiences. Life is fascinating.
)
ANCIENT