A good response to a friend

[celestialuna]

So I have a friend I met at church twice that I want to just meet one on one to grab a drink and get to know each other but she says she can't. This is how the texts went:
Me: ah okay, do you want to grab a drink sometime.
Her: I'm busy at the moment with wedding stuff - I guess the not so great side of busyness lol. I was procrastinating for awhile but ya I need to pick up the pace since I have 2 months left =\
She is single and not marrying anyone. What'd be a good response to this?

 

[Altimeter]

It's such a hay wired situation.. She might be a virgin looking for someone to marry if she's a regular church goer. It just sounds too complicated already, can't you ask another girl out? Say your neighbour?

Either way, this doesn't sound like a message from a girl who is dying to meet you but can't due to circumstances so..

A simple "nice to have met someone who's also interested in ..." should suffice . 'Cause some guy at a club has a much greater shot at her than you do right now


So drop her off your list and look for others, she might even be a lesbian who know's ? Even movie stars get rejected

 

[celestialuna]

I'm not looking to date her. I just want to know what I should say to ask her to hang out after her response.

 

[Tyme2k]

Never ask. That was your fist mistake. You need to lead. Asking do you want to go out sometime is a surefire way to get a no.

Ask yourself this, what value are you offering for her to come out? To me it seems as of yet you offered nothing, will you buy her a drink? Are you going to show her a new place? your favorite place? What?

If you are only trying to take from her she will never want to meetup with you. Try inviting her to something cool, "Hey a few friends and I are going to XXX thursday come join." "There's a great new place by XXX join me for a drink, let's say tuesday or Thursday evening?" Offer something.

 

[celestialuna]

so are there ways to combat this mistake after she is currently busy due to circumstances.

 

[Tyme2k]

so are there ways to combat this mistake after she is currently busy due to circumstances.

I'm not sure what you mean.

Yes?

 

[celestialuna]

What ways are there to combat this mistake the next time or for this situation.

 

[Tyme2k]

I noticed this is your first topic.

How much exactly do you know about pickup?
How many girls are you actively talking to?
How many dates do you have this week?
How many times have you had sex?
How many women are in your life?

I attempted to address your problem and one thing I can tell your is there and will never be a one all answer for everything. There is no "Magic Pill" perse. I will quote what I said earlier for you.

Never ask. That was your fist mistake. You need to lead. Asking do you want to go out sometime is a surefire way to get a no.

Ask yourself this, what value are you offering for her to come out? To me it seems as of yet you offered nothing, will you buy her a drink? Are you going to show her a new place? your favorite place? What?

If you are only trying to take from her she will never want to meetup with you. Try inviting her to something cool, "Hey a few friends and I are going to XXX thursday come join." "There's a great new place by XXX join me for a drink, let's say tuesday or Thursday evening?" Offer something.

It is very important to not ask. It is also important to offer value, I feel you are sucking value away from her, similar as you are with your question. I feel my suggestions could potentially help you resurrect, BUT my honest opinion is that you leave this girl alone and GET MORE GIRLS. You will see this girl more at church and burning this set down could harm your reputation. If I'm wrong, by all means burn it down. Otherwise go talk to more women, read Chase's articles and get your fundamentals handled.

Start here
Abundance for newbies Read this to understand abundance a little better.

 

[celestialuna]

Thanks for your suggestions. I'll read Chase's info about hooking about with girls. I don't know much about pickup but I've read about Amante chase's topics on his main page. I've never dated or had sex but I have female friends. What do you mean by burning this set down could harm your reputation?

 

[Altimeter]

First of all, you DON'T have a reputation because you haven't done anything to start with

Second, You have been rejected. Don't be a wimp and be all indirect about asking women out. Your best way of asking is directly, with confidence that you like her, talk to her get to know her a little and suggest a meet up.

You on the other hand haven't done any of these, sounds like you made some small talk and asked her out. SHE doesn't want to meet you, that's why she's making excuses. If she really did want to met you, she would even if there was a hurricane.

READ Chase's book, I can recommend you 1 or 2 books too if you pm me but Chase should cover most of your questions.

don't burden her with this meet up. She has no obligation to meet up with friends or with people she knows. She will meet up with guys that have charisma, charm and confidence. NOT just bad boys.

If you want a girlfriend or someone to have sex with, Casualy meet a lot of girls and ask out a lot of them, like you ask what time it is. Eventually one of them will accept and be with you.

Until you do these things, don't come here and ask retarded questions.

 

[celestialuna]

I'm asking cause I want to know. I'm not planning on asking her for a date. Absolutely there is no such thing as retarded questions.

 

[Tyme2k]

I think Altimeter was just expressing general frustration with your lack of understanding. It's perfectly fine as we have all been in a similar spot before.

I was speaking reputation as in what it may be like in the church, if you go around hounding girls in the church you will seem creepy. You must work on fundamentals and women will beg to hang with you.