Thanks
@Glow , this is really what I was looking for!!
Youre welcome
@uriel. happy to help.
Do you have any more suggestions for #1 and #8... when reading them, they felt like something that I am really missing.
#1 is about considering what your ask is from her or suggest for the next thing forward. Asking her to go to your place bluntly w no context or moment preceding it is a high risk, less efficient way for most guys as you prob know. On the opposite end more light nexts framed in positive manners or by hyping it the right way as a momentum in the flow your in w her will make the investment small and the benefits great. think about the feelings in her that pop up and the weight of each. Eg. saying
youre curious about the subject xxx you guys talked about, and youre actually headed to a cafe w a great athpmosphere, sweet italian people and an undeniable coffee, you have ten minutes, i would love for you join me just for a brief talk is very easy for her to say yes to as it does many things - its a wellframed easy next with many good feel things for her and very reduced investment.
#8 is larger and there can be many sides to this. For me this is where guys go into advanced levels and real seduction vs. pu. Its about starting to understand women, reading them, eliciting their worlds out actively and adapting the techs and doings to her state at the moment and her personality.
the doings include:
- Understanding her lifescapes, imagery of her life and what she would like - guys, situations, environments people etc.
- Understanding her state, is she on the back heel, is she flirty fun, vibing, is she sexually activated, is she paranoid etc. Each demands
- understand her emotional wants in the moment and harmonicall mirroring her for harmony. this demands a sensitivity and connection to her, activation of emotional capacity and intuition.
These things literally reforms the idea of compliance for me fyi cause girls will start mutually escalating a lot more when you can hit these buttons.
Sexually its the same, what sorta seed is she putting out, how can you escalate accordingly, not the usual bs escalate kiss her focus or touch only permission approach generation one idiocy that people still seem to follow. But how do you progressively touch her sensual feels and energy, how do you edge it and tempt her building arousal to a level where she craves you and the being with you is loaded. Sex talk eg with this sorta aim gives you a different level of impact on her as its sorta like orgasm control, just on how you impact her with escalatory elements across a flow. Sorta arousing her from the inside out more. using what we call sexual bubbles and the likes.
knowing more about her sexual maturity, preferences and fantasies can help you adapt here. Sensing her can help you adapt. And this way small movements can do huge things.
At the end of the day especially sex should never be about compliance. if so then one is not using good principles of seduction.
I was also surprised about #3.
Do you mean that compliance done right is more like an ask than a command?
I mention it because what I do is always ask and suggest yet I feel I am missing chances by not giving verbal orders... at the same time, orders feel so socially unsavvy.
If you tell me that asks are way better than orders, then I will look for other ways to make my compliance better. Perhaps I was worrying about the wrong thing the whole time.
its the energy behind your ask or command.
is it weak, uncertain
is it in peace in yourself, relaxed but expressive not putting any pressure on her
or is it forced onto her, a demand
Again theres no golden rule as it depends. But i find that respectfulness triggers less bs especially if she has any backheeling w you or scepticism. when its a request coming from your want undemanding i find it to work best - or its my choice as i want to go emphatically into it and give her my feeling and wish. but never demanding. i could do it as a challenge more. or put weight in it with my energy while still being non agressive . theres just a tipping point i hope you can sorta sense where i prefer to stay in myself here if shes being normal and not bitchy w me.
Its about articulating your ask. You can also start articulating the feels behind it which is like magic w. girls. But thats a larger topic.
By doing so she senses shes very safe w me and that im clear and sincere on expressing my wants or asking for things.
i like at base to ask with a sorta firmness, and polite appreciation - polite vampire style where i know what i want, not afraid to ask for it but doing so in a way that shows a receptiveness and stays on my side fully.
Hope that gives a lil.
The big picture is to start understanding them a lot more vs just doing techs blindly like many do. Using skills like
elicitation becomes key here. Seeing her becomes key. sensing her. and knowing girls much more in reality, not some odd notions from evolutionary theory or whatever a lot of traditional PU builds on.
