Advice for a newbie

[PilotPUA]

Hey guys! I'm pretty new here, but so far I'm really enjoying pick up and even just the community itself. I wanted to say hi and ask for some advice.

Lately I've been practicing some day game in a nearby park or whenever I'm out in the city.

My biggest issue is keeping the approach from ending too quickly. Whenever I approach a group of girls or if I have to obviously go to her (like one that's walking or sitting off on her own), I get some approach anxiety and have trouble finding a way to not start out the interaction chasing her. Once I do approach, I have trouble getting from "some stranger who said something" to "some cool guy I want to chat with" and my interactions end quickly.

My questions are:

• Any advice for not immediately chasing her during the approach?
• What about overcoming anxiety consistently? (I know, approach more often... Figured I'd get some other thoughts, though)
• How do y'all get enough momentum to seem like friends and keep the interaction going?

I know these are really basic questions, but I appreciate any thoughts. Thanks in advance and I'm really excited to get better at all this!

 

[POB]

A basic technique I use when I want to talk to someone I don't know yet is to think of that person as an old friend I haven't seen in a long time.
It's just a basic reframe of my own thoughts (changing from "damn, will this person like me?" to "damn, we have a lot o catch up to do!")

Also get your train of thought aligned more in terms of a natural flow than an obligation to click.
If the vibe is there, cool!
If not, keep pushing till you get a solid yes or no.
(it's gonna desensitize you to rejection, because at the end of the day it's not a big deal).
More often than not rejection is something that has nothing to do with you...so why care?

If you get a blank mind in the middle of it, just say: "Look, I really don't know what to say right now....but I love the way you smile!" or something along those lines...look at her in the eyes, smile yourself and let her giggle a bit...women love to exude their feminine energy when they get attention from men. "See, we should see where that vibe leads...what you up to now?" and set up logistics for an insta date.

Also remember: groups are harder than solo!

Edit: Shit, I forgot....it's also good to talk to other people before engaging with girls! Like if you are at the park, talk to the street vendors, the elderly, the children and so on. This is gonna get the ball rolling before the main approaches! (plus it gets you conversational topics with chicks, like: "See that ice cream vendor over there? Can you believe he has 3 kids already?".

 

[PilotPUA]

A basic technique I use when I want to talk to someone I don't know yet is to think of that person as an old friend I haven't seen in a long time.
It's just a basic reframe of my own thoughts (changing from "damn, will this person like me?" to "damn, we have a lot o catch up to do!")

Also get your train of thought aligned more in terms of a natural flow than an obligation to click.
If the vibe is there, cool!
If not, keep pushing till you get a solid yes or no.
(it's gonna desensitize you to rejection, because at the end of the day it's not a big deal).
More often than not rejection is something that has nothing to do with you...so why care?

If you get a blank mind in the middle of it, just say: "Look, I really don't know what to say right now....but I love the way you smile!" or something along those lines...look at her in the eyes, smile yourself and let her giggle a bit...women love to exude their feminine energy when they get attention from men. "See, we should see where that vibe leads...what you up to now?" and set up logistics for an insta date.

Also remember: groups are harder than solo!

Edit: Shit, I forgot....it's also good to talk to other people before engaging with girls! Like if you are at the park, talk to the street vendors, the elderly, the children and so on. This is gonna get the ball rolling before the main approaches! (plus it gets you conversational topics with chicks, like: "See that ice cream vendor over there? Can you believe he has 3 kids already?".

Thanks for the reply! I like your tips on not worrying as much or feeling an obligation to click… I’ll definitely try to get better at that.

Thanks!

 

[Lobo]

@PilotPUA
If you're relatively new to this, I recommend giving @Lofty 's post here a look and more specifically the links in them as they will give you a roadmap and a new perspective towards seduction as well as who you might become.

Also, I did a fair amount of park approaches in a big city this summer and was able to reach the hook point consistently towards the end. I say these things help reach the hook point:

Social frame is big(lofty's post has a link on this. Understanding what this means is crucial)
Fundamentals (looks as well as voice tonality, voice pace, presence) all of these impact the social frame you communicate.

Does your approach seem intentional or more like accidental... or by fate? (this influences social frame). An engineered approach communicates low value and needy because you seem like a pick up artist(and society does not value that)
A spontaeneous, fateful approach is often times romantisized in movies and books, the same circumstances the woman you approach are entranced by.
You make the approach seem accidental by not b-lining towards the girl, but instead being near and letting her notice you in your own interesting world, and with your tonality(more I just noticed you than I saw your ass a couple blocks down and finally caught up)
Also with me, I noticed my hook rate double when I stopped opening with a naked hey, and instead used a small attention grab like "you know" or "hey there, i just noticed something..."

And immersive techniques shown in lofty's post.

Keep at it, results are right past the hill.

 

[PilotPUA]

@PilotPUA
If you're relatively new to this, I recommend giving @Lofty 's post here a look and more specifically the links in them as they will give you a roadmap and a new perspective towards seduction as well as who you might become.

Also, I did a fair amount of park approaches in a big city this summer and was able to reach the hook point consistently towards the end. I say these things help reach the hook point:

Social frame is big(lofty's post has a link on this. Understanding what this means is crucial)
Fundamentals (looks as well as voice tonality, voice pace, presence) all of these impact the social frame you communicate.

Does your approach seem intentional or more like accidental... or by fate? (this influences social frame). An engineered approach communicates low value and needy because you seem like a pick up artist(and society does not value that)
A spontaeneous, fateful approach is often times romantisized in movies and books, the same circumstances the woman you approach are entranced by.
You make the approach seem accidental by not b-lining towards the girl, but instead being near and letting her notice you in your own interesting world, and with your tonality(more I just noticed you than I saw your ass a couple blocks down and finally caught up)
Also with me, I noticed my hook rate double when I stopped opening with a naked hey, and instead used a small attention grab like "you know" or "hey there, i just noticed something..."

And immersive techniques shown in lofty's post.

Keep at it, results are right past the hill.

Thanks for the advice, I’ll take a look at that post you referenced! I read the recent article about going near a girl without appearing to do it intentionally and making it seem like an accident, but it isn’t quite working out for me so far. I’m sure I’ll figure it out with a bit more practice, though!