After learning pickup, does not straying in an LTR ever become easy?

[episodic]

Hey guys, before getting into my current LTR I became moderately successful in pickup.

I was just about starting to feel like a real playboy when I met my girlfriend and decided to stop seeing
the multiple women I was dating and focus just on her. She was by far the best girl I had ever met, combining
chemistry with low risk for cheating.

But I still meet people through general talking to people and through friends, and when I feel a vibe and can
sense the possibility of something happening, I feel the strongest urge in the world to move things forward like
I would in a normal seduction, yet obviously I don't and shouldn't.

My question is does this ever go away? If I broke up with my girlfriend, became VERY good as opposed to kind of
good with girls, would the urge to stray just not be there anymore since I'd have experienced so much abundance?

For context, I'm an LTR guy in general. The whole reason I got into seduction was to get into a great LTR.
Also I never felt it very much in previous relationships, but I never had as many options in previous relationships as
I do now, so it's not really a fair comparison.

 

[Marcellus]

In my limited relationship experience I would say no, not really. You're a man and will be attracted to different women, just because you're in a relationship doesn't change that fact. I guess it's just really about self control.
What I hate though is when you get in a relationship and millions of girls start showing interest in you... like goddamn bitches where we're yall when I was single

 

[Chase]

@episodic,

Nah, it doesn’t go away.

It cools off though if you are really doing monogamy.

Even just doing FWB you will note your desire to take other girls cools off a bit.

I will say that with a long-term chick the big factors seem to be whether she is following “the mandate”* and whether she manages to keep you interested or not.

(*“the mandate” being “a woman who desires to retain her man keeps his balls empty and his belly full”)

Every retired player I know in a monogamous LTR who also does a lot of cheating is either dealing with a woman who has stopped putting out / barely puts out or who has started to bore him.

If you go for the quiet, submissive, supportive types (i.e., sweet-but-boring) or you get a chick whose sex drive doesn’t match yours or starts withholding sex, you are likely to find yourself picking up other chicks again.

It’s different for guys who never learned to attract women and don’t feel like they have options.

Those dudes have a different struggle… trapped in celibacy in their sexless relationships, or trapped in boredom in their boring ones, without feeling like there is any way out.

No matter what, you are going to struggle:

• Don’t learn game and get a girl who won’t put out — sexless relationship
  
  
• Don’t learn game and get a girl who is boring — boredom
  
  
• Learn game and get a girl who won’t put out or is boring — cheating/relationship instability
  
  
• Get an exciting girl who is horny all the time — you will get annoying drama (the flip side of an energetic personality) and may even be sexed out by her if she is draining your balls dry all the time

Choose your struggle wisely…!

Chase

 

[gameboy]

What I hate though is when you get in a relationship and millions of girls start showing interest in you... like goddamn bitches where we're yall when I was single

This is soooo true... lol!

 

[Skills]

Hey guys, before getting into my current LTR I became moderately successful in pickup.

I was just about starting to feel like a real playboy when I met my girlfriend and decided to stop seeing
the multiple women I was dating and focus just on her. She was by far the best girl I had ever met, combining
chemistry with low risk for cheating.

But I still meet people through general talking to people and through friends, and when I feel a vibe and can
sense the possibility of something happening, I feel the strongest urge in the world to move things forward like
I would in a normal seduction, yet obviously I don't and shouldn't.

My question is does this ever go away? If I broke up with my girlfriend, became VERY good as opposed to kind of
good with girls, would the urge to stray just not be there anymore since I'd have experienced so much abundance?

For context, I'm an LTR guy in general. The whole reason I got into seduction was to get into a great LTR.
Also I never felt it very much in previous relationships, but I never had as many options in previous relationships as
I do now, so it's not really a fair comparison.

This is normal, and you will go through cycles, i had a post that i cant find on my blog...

When you are single you wish to have a gf...
When you have a gf you wish you were single and back and forth...

But finally you are one of the few that actually did it right...

You got a lot of girls picked from abundance then dump the girls...that is the right way to go into ltr...

Cycles go single, bang a lot of girls, relationship, break up rinse wash repeat

 

[West_Indian_Archie]

But I still meet people through general talking to people and through friends, and when I feel a vibe and can
sense the possibility of something happening, I feel the strongest urge in the world to move things forward like
I would in a normal seduction, yet obviously I don't and shouldn't.

My question is does this ever go away?

You are no longer blind.

Prior to doing pick up systematically, you probably missed all of the signs of sexual interest.

The more you do this, the more interactions you have, the more interactions you keep having - the more you see that people, women, especially of a certain age - like to flirt, like to play with danger - and because you know how quickly a spark can turn into a raging fire - you'll always see possibility.

Chicks might not even be flirting with you, but get them to talk about something passionately, with full emotion - just your ability to bring out some passion in them - will often turn on their carnal selves. (IMO).

If I broke up with my girlfriend, became VERY good as opposed to kind of
good with girls, would the urge to stray just not be there anymore since I'd have experienced so much abundance?

That's a sex drive thing, not a relationship status thing, not a quality of your woman type thing. A lot of folks think of it as maturity, but I think it's testosterone plain and simple.

But staying sharp, staying viable - is a good thing. In order to keep his LTR in the right "state" for lack of a better term - a man must remain a sexual option to all the women around him to keep his woman with him. A lot of a woman's value (esp when she's relatively young) is contextual/social.

And this only applies if you think keeping a woman with you is a good thing - you may get to the point where you're gonna wonder if keeping females is more trouble than its worth.

WIA

 

[isildur1]

i enjoy my LTR i am in now because the woman respects me , treats me well , is kind hearted and well mannered - if i cheat it on her i don't believe its too my benefit as it would take a lot to find someone as good as her .

But i do miss the rush of daygame, the fascination behind relationship and sexual dynamics is one that i will forever be passionate about its a big part of who i am but I've filled that time with other hobbies and interests to maintain my SMV and keep my direction in life going strong. I still spend a good portion of free time blogging about dating as a way to stay attached to the good times - but i would never cheat because it just mentally fucks up the girl and could traumatise her . I've seen some women get mentally destroyed by their partners cheating and never recover similarly women who's parents have affairs tend to be all over the place. Cheating has ramifications and those ramifications can be dangerous.

LTRS can be great - it depends how you spend your time in them - if you use them as an excuse to be lazy and complacent as i have in my past then they can be damaging - and i know in LTRs men statistically have lower testosterone levels but i guess its up to you as a man to be proactive and keep the value coming in your life.

 

[Teparus]

Hmm...
I would say that it eventually did become easy, yes. My now-wife wanted exclusivity about 4 or 5 months in, and I remained monogamous for around 5 years. For the first year, it was -hard-. Mostly for the reason you mentioned -- it's just so automatic to try to move things forward and act on those signals. That being said, it did get easier, and it wasn't hard to not stray, exactly...but I was cognizant of opportunities to do so, from time to time.

Ultimately, if you can keep how you feel about her closer to your conscious mind than your attraction to other women, it makes it a lot easier. And simply ignoring (as in redirecting your attention away from) attractive women helped, too.