Hey guys, long time no post here! Once again thanks for the amazing content! I'd really like some insight into something that has been bothering me for months.
Some background: Before I met my girlfriend, I was hooking up and maintaining a pretty active rotation of girls. Sexually speaking, it was an awesome time, as each girl had very different tastes/interests. My favorite part about getting intimate with a girl is exploring them.
Around that time, I met an amazing woman. She has all the qualities I appreciate in a woman, and she's the woman that I want to have kids with and build a life together.
However, when it comes to sex, we have a bit of different views. Of all the girls that I dated at the time, she was the only one that I couldn't bed in the first night. Coming from Russia, she has very different views of sex than I do (coming from South America lol), and that was something that I appreciated when I decided to get monogamous with her.
We have amazing sex, when we do, but I'd like to open her mind and get her to explore more. Her sexual vocabulary is a little limited, she never watched porn, and she never thought much about sex, not the same way that I do. When I talk about more kinky things she just laughs and finds a bit repulsive - those things are just outside of her realm.
For the past few months she's been working very hard on finishing her studies, which left very little room for sex. Our frequency dropped to very few times a month, which makes it very hard for me as I have a very high sex drive. At times, I thought that we just had incompatible sex drives - but when we traveled recently we had great sex every day. It's just that the life here in the USA does everything to kill true sexuality, instead turning everything into commodities.
The second point is that recently we got in a weird dynamic, as I'm always making dirty jokes or innuendos, but she never takes them sexually anymore. It's more like "oh yeah you are so sexual haha you are just so dirty". But I also want her to get dirty thoughts too. I want her to fantasize when I tell her sexual stories in her ears (she just giggles, whereas other girls in the past would start getting wet). And I just want her to act more slutty when we are together. But I want this to come from her, not from me. Basically, I want to help her bring her deep sexuality to the surface.
I guess to make my main question clear: Is it a problem if I'm always the only one saying dirty jokes or proposing novel things in bed? Is it even recommended to be alluding to sex all the time? My intention was to keep the sexual frame alive, but it might be having the opposite effect...
I love this woman, I appreciate all her qualities, we are amazing together, and she's damn hot, a russian top model with a great personality, cultural values and who will be a great mother. I don't want to replace her. Rather I want to take our relationship to the next level.
Any insights would greatly be appreciated!
Thanks!
Some background: Before I met my girlfriend, I was hooking up and maintaining a pretty active rotation of girls. Sexually speaking, it was an awesome time, as each girl had very different tastes/interests. My favorite part about getting intimate with a girl is exploring them.
Around that time, I met an amazing woman. She has all the qualities I appreciate in a woman, and she's the woman that I want to have kids with and build a life together.
However, when it comes to sex, we have a bit of different views. Of all the girls that I dated at the time, she was the only one that I couldn't bed in the first night. Coming from Russia, she has very different views of sex than I do (coming from South America lol), and that was something that I appreciated when I decided to get monogamous with her.
We have amazing sex, when we do, but I'd like to open her mind and get her to explore more. Her sexual vocabulary is a little limited, she never watched porn, and she never thought much about sex, not the same way that I do. When I talk about more kinky things she just laughs and finds a bit repulsive - those things are just outside of her realm.
For the past few months she's been working very hard on finishing her studies, which left very little room for sex. Our frequency dropped to very few times a month, which makes it very hard for me as I have a very high sex drive. At times, I thought that we just had incompatible sex drives - but when we traveled recently we had great sex every day. It's just that the life here in the USA does everything to kill true sexuality, instead turning everything into commodities.
The second point is that recently we got in a weird dynamic, as I'm always making dirty jokes or innuendos, but she never takes them sexually anymore. It's more like "oh yeah you are so sexual haha you are just so dirty". But I also want her to get dirty thoughts too. I want her to fantasize when I tell her sexual stories in her ears (she just giggles, whereas other girls in the past would start getting wet). And I just want her to act more slutty when we are together. But I want this to come from her, not from me. Basically, I want to help her bring her deep sexuality to the surface.
I guess to make my main question clear: Is it a problem if I'm always the only one saying dirty jokes or proposing novel things in bed? Is it even recommended to be alluding to sex all the time? My intention was to keep the sexual frame alive, but it might be having the opposite effect...
I love this woman, I appreciate all her qualities, we are amazing together, and she's damn hot, a russian top model with a great personality, cultural values and who will be a great mother. I don't want to replace her. Rather I want to take our relationship to the next level.
Any insights would greatly be appreciated!
Thanks!
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