- Joined
- Aug 24, 2024
- Messages
- 29
Goal
I am working on adding sexual intent and making conversation less boring.- STRONG eye contact
- Tease girls within 30 seconds
- Look for opportunities to get off boring conversation by shifting to a emotional topic
I am also working on meditating to improve my presence and focus. I notice I forget my goals a lot in the field, and I believe meditation will allow me to remember better.
Outing
I went to a local art and wine festival today. I did a short meditation to relax before going out.Approach 1
I see a girl walk dressed in a jacket with her hood and sunglasses on while perpendicular to me. This is usually not a good sign, but I notice her look in my direction a little bit longer than is usual, so I guess it is an approach invitation. I chat with her for a bit, and she asks me a couple of questions, but she is clearly distracted looking for the booth she's supposed to work at. She spends a lot of time looking at her phone and texting. There's eventually a break where she starts texting while I look away and off in the distance, acting bored; I figure I will see if she re-engages. She then says she is heading off and departs.Takeaway: It might have been an approach invitation but she was clearly a bit stressed and distracted. Maybe I could have tried closing quickly, otherwise didn't know how to handle this.
Approach 2
I saw a cute girl in a pretty dress walk by. I have to jog a bit to catch up to her, and I get slightly in front of her before opening. She responds positively but moves on quickly.Me: "Excuse me, hi. I just saw you pass by over there, and I thought you looked absolutely enchanting in this dress."
Her: "Thank you."
Me: <Introduces myself>
Her: <Introduces herself>
Me: "What are you up to today?"
Her: "I'm one of the vendors, I have to go back to my booth."
Me: "Oh, what do you guys do? Dresses?" <I point to her dress>
Her: "Oh no, we sell soaps."
Me: "Oh okay, is the dress just to make people come look?" <Teasing her>
Her: <Laughs> "Sure, yeah."
Me: <I smile and hold eye contact>
Her: "I gotta get going now."
Me: "Okay, well have a great day."
Her: "Thank you."
Me: <Introduces myself>
Her: <Introduces herself>
Me: "What are you up to today?"
Her: "I'm one of the vendors, I have to go back to my booth."
Me: "Oh, what do you guys do? Dresses?" <I point to her dress>
Her: "Oh no, we sell soaps."
Me: "Oh okay, is the dress just to make people come look?" <Teasing her>
Her: <Laughs> "Sure, yeah."
Me: <I smile and hold eye contact>
Her: "I gotta get going now."
Me: "Okay, well have a great day."
Takeaways: I was able to tease within 30 seconds and hold good eye contact. This tease was good but I could've delivered it a bit more flirtatiously to make it more of a chase frame.
Approach 3
I see a girl in a cute denim dress walk by down a busy street. She seems cute, but I have to maneuver a bit around people to find a good spot to approach her when there's not too many potential interruptions from people walking through. I get slightly in front of her, and she seems confused at first but responds very positively when I deliver the compliment. She has sunglasses on but seems cute and shows some signs of interest.Me: "Hi, I just saw you back over there, and I just wanted to say I thought your outfit was so trendy."
Her: "Oh, thank you so much!"
Me: "I just thought the blue, and the way the brown matched your hair, it was really well done."
Her: "Thank you so much."
<We introduce ourselves>
Me: "Um, how are you doing today?"
Her: "I'm good, how are you?"
Me: "Good. Hold on, I think we're in the way a bit." <I hold strong eye contact while indicating we should move over"
Her: "Oh, sorry" <She moves over with me>
Me: "So hi, how are you doing today? What are you up to?" <I seemed to have forgotten I just asked this>
Her: "Oh, I'm just walking around, exploring."
Me: "Shopping for anything in particular?"
Her: "Um, I just bought flowers, so"
Me: "Oh, for me?" <Teasing her a little, plus chase frame>
Her: <Laughs>
Me: "Or for you?"
Her: "They're for me"
Me: "Okay, are you a flower person?"
Her: "I am a flower person, yes"
Me: "Oh, so do you like nature?"
Her: "Yeah, I do like nature"
Me: "Oh wow, yeah I love that. I love people who can appreciate both urban aspects and natural aspects of beauty. I think that's uh...yeah, do you do anything artistic?" <A bit clumsy but I am trying to screen her>
Her: "Uh, not really, I just really enjoy looking at artistic things I guess"
Me: "But you like fashion?"
Her: "I guess so, yeah! I do like fashion."
Me: "So yeah, you are artistic then."
Her: "Uh, I guess so, sure."
Me: "That's lovely."
Her: "Thank you. I also like your shirt as well."
Me: "Oh thank you. This is...you know, I have no idea what these patterns are."
Her: "Oh it's uh, it's like a hawaiian print."
Me: "People tell me it looks like dinosaurs?"
Her: "Uh no, I think it looks like a <she mentions a hawaiian plant>"
Me: "Oh, are you a big traveller?"
Her: "I am a big traveller, yeah."
Me: "Oh wow. Do you explore a lot of places?"
Her: "Yeah, I just came back from Hawaii actually."
Me: "Oh lovely. I love Hawaii. Hawaii is...I went in the summer a few years ago. This is before global warming was like really, really heavy...but the water was so beautiful, it was just like so warm, and going inside was like going into a pool. Yeah, it was a great time."
Her: <She give mmn-hmms as I tell the story>
Me: "One problem was, I went surfing. Did you go surfing there?"
Her: "No, I've only done it twice in my life, I'm very bad but its fun."
Me: "Okay, when you go surfing, you must drink water. I made this mistake. I got really dehydrated out at sea, and I got so weak I couldn't really swim back. So the instructor I was with, he tied me to his foot, and swam back to shore with me." <I'm not sure what the point of telling this story was>
Her: "Oh no, well at least you had someone with you."
Me: "Yeah yeah, it was a learning experience, but it was also fun."
Her: "Yeah, well I'm glad you survived."
Me: "So do you have any big plans for the rest of the day?"
Her: "Well, I have to go to work after."
Me: "You have to work on a Sunday?"
Her: "Yeah, I work at a hospital, so..."
Me: "Oh wow, so are you like a medical doctor...?"
Her: "I'm a pharmacist. I work in the hospital so, I have to leave around 1pm. Just strolling then need to go to work after." <This is pretty soon>
Me: "You must've worked really hard to get there." <Trying to shift to emotional topic instead of facts>
Her: "Uh, yeah I guess I did work pretty hard."
Me: "I hear medical school is like, so tough."
Her: "Oh yeah, it's pharmacy school instead. It's still four years, still a doctorate, but different things that you go through. What do you do?"
Me: "Well I turn ideas into reality. Kinda. I do a little bit of, uh, engineering, so I like to sum it up that way." <I am workshopping more intriguing answers to "What do you do?", this one felt like kind of a dud, maybe it was my delivery>
Her: "That is a good summary."
Me: "How did you get into medicine? Did you just decide one day that 'I'm going to sell drugs!' ?" <Teasing + making conversation about her>
Her: "Well, I actually don't touch any of the drugs. Actually it's more like consulting." <She explains a little what she does>
Me: "Okay, so if I want to have a good time, I need to come to you, right?" <I was trying to tease, saying she can suggest me the right drugs, but my phrasing came out a bit weirdly>
Her: "I hope you never come to the hospital, because then that would be a bad thing." <She laughs>
Me: "Aw man, what if I wanted recreational drugs?"
Her: "Oh that's definitely not me. Only uh, for therapy. Nothing recreational for me." <She laughs>
Me: "Okay, gotcha. Well hey, I don't want to keep you too long" <I hold eye contact, touch her elbow>
Her: "It was nice meeting you"
Me: "It was nice meeting you. But I think you're cool, we should grab like a coffee sometime."
Her: "Oh, I'm sorry, I have a boyfriend, so..."
Me: "No worries"
Her: "But, um, thanks for the compliment! It was uh...you made my day!"
Me: "No, yeah, you really are trendy today."
Her: "Thank you so much! It was nice meeting you."
Me: "Hope you have a great day."
Her: "Thank you."
Her: "Oh, thank you so much!"
Me: "I just thought the blue, and the way the brown matched your hair, it was really well done."
Her: "Thank you so much."
<We introduce ourselves>
Me: "Um, how are you doing today?"
Her: "I'm good, how are you?"
Me: "Good. Hold on, I think we're in the way a bit." <I hold strong eye contact while indicating we should move over"
Her: "Oh, sorry" <She moves over with me>
Me: "So hi, how are you doing today? What are you up to?" <I seemed to have forgotten I just asked this>
Her: "Oh, I'm just walking around, exploring."
Me: "Shopping for anything in particular?"
Her: "Um, I just bought flowers, so"
Me: "Oh, for me?" <Teasing her a little, plus chase frame>
Her: <Laughs>
Me: "Or for you?"
Her: "They're for me"
Me: "Okay, are you a flower person?"
Her: "I am a flower person, yes"
Me: "Oh, so do you like nature?"
Her: "Yeah, I do like nature"
Me: "Oh wow, yeah I love that. I love people who can appreciate both urban aspects and natural aspects of beauty. I think that's uh...yeah, do you do anything artistic?" <A bit clumsy but I am trying to screen her>
Her: "Uh, not really, I just really enjoy looking at artistic things I guess"
Me: "But you like fashion?"
Her: "I guess so, yeah! I do like fashion."
Me: "So yeah, you are artistic then."
Her: "Uh, I guess so, sure."
Me: "That's lovely."
Her: "Thank you. I also like your shirt as well."
Me: "Oh thank you. This is...you know, I have no idea what these patterns are."
Her: "Oh it's uh, it's like a hawaiian print."
Me: "People tell me it looks like dinosaurs?"
Her: "Uh no, I think it looks like a <she mentions a hawaiian plant>"
Me: "Oh, are you a big traveller?"
Her: "I am a big traveller, yeah."
Me: "Oh wow. Do you explore a lot of places?"
Her: "Yeah, I just came back from Hawaii actually."
Me: "Oh lovely. I love Hawaii. Hawaii is...I went in the summer a few years ago. This is before global warming was like really, really heavy...but the water was so beautiful, it was just like so warm, and going inside was like going into a pool. Yeah, it was a great time."
Her: <She give mmn-hmms as I tell the story>
Me: "One problem was, I went surfing. Did you go surfing there?"
Her: "No, I've only done it twice in my life, I'm very bad but its fun."
Me: "Okay, when you go surfing, you must drink water. I made this mistake. I got really dehydrated out at sea, and I got so weak I couldn't really swim back. So the instructor I was with, he tied me to his foot, and swam back to shore with me." <I'm not sure what the point of telling this story was>
Her: "Oh no, well at least you had someone with you."
Me: "Yeah yeah, it was a learning experience, but it was also fun."
Her: "Yeah, well I'm glad you survived."
Me: "So do you have any big plans for the rest of the day?"
Her: "Well, I have to go to work after."
Me: "You have to work on a Sunday?"
Her: "Yeah, I work at a hospital, so..."
Me: "Oh wow, so are you like a medical doctor...?"
Her: "I'm a pharmacist. I work in the hospital so, I have to leave around 1pm. Just strolling then need to go to work after." <This is pretty soon>
Me: "You must've worked really hard to get there." <Trying to shift to emotional topic instead of facts>
Her: "Uh, yeah I guess I did work pretty hard."
Me: "I hear medical school is like, so tough."
Her: "Oh yeah, it's pharmacy school instead. It's still four years, still a doctorate, but different things that you go through. What do you do?"
Me: "Well I turn ideas into reality. Kinda. I do a little bit of, uh, engineering, so I like to sum it up that way." <I am workshopping more intriguing answers to "What do you do?", this one felt like kind of a dud, maybe it was my delivery>
Her: "That is a good summary."
Me: "How did you get into medicine? Did you just decide one day that 'I'm going to sell drugs!' ?" <Teasing + making conversation about her>
Her: "Well, I actually don't touch any of the drugs. Actually it's more like consulting." <She explains a little what she does>
Me: "Okay, so if I want to have a good time, I need to come to you, right?" <I was trying to tease, saying she can suggest me the right drugs, but my phrasing came out a bit weirdly>
Her: "I hope you never come to the hospital, because then that would be a bad thing." <She laughs>
Me: "Aw man, what if I wanted recreational drugs?"
Her: "Oh that's definitely not me. Only uh, for therapy. Nothing recreational for me." <She laughs>
Me: "Okay, gotcha. Well hey, I don't want to keep you too long" <I hold eye contact, touch her elbow>
Her: "It was nice meeting you"
Me: "It was nice meeting you. But I think you're cool, we should grab like a coffee sometime."
Her: "Oh, I'm sorry, I have a boyfriend, so..."
Me: "No worries"
Her: "But, um, thanks for the compliment! It was uh...you made my day!"
Me: "No, yeah, you really are trendy today."
Her: "Thank you so much! It was nice meeting you."
Me: "Hope you have a great day."
Her: "Thank you."
Takeaways: I met my goals, holding strong eye contact, teasing early, and shifting conversation to more emotional topics. I think my wording and phrasing is a bit clumsy and could be improved. I also didn't really add a "point" to my story to give it any useful purpose in the seduction. I could have said something like, "It's fun to explore and try something new, just don't forget to take care of yourself too!" I also did some screening early, but forgot to do it more later. I could have asked for more compliance since I didn't ask any after the first move. Also need to keep working on my answer to "What do you do?"
Approach 4
I am taking a rest under some shade when I see two different attractive women walking in my direction. They are not together and I need to quickly choose one to approach. I choose the closer one, who is wearing a pretty blouse and dress that reminds me of a yee-old English outfit. She responds with a bit of a monotone, but seems slightly pleased. I chat and tease her a little, and she mentions she is meeting a friend, who she is dating. I transition out after that and bid her a farewell.Takeaways: I didn't ask for any compliance and we didn't have a lot of conversation. I stumbled a bit to describe my thoughts when trying to compliment her when I should express it clearly and simply. I only complimented her outfit so she might not have realized I was interested in her immediately. I don't remember how I held eye contact, so maybe I didn't express enough sexual intent that way. I could have also closed proximity more.
Approach 5
As a pretty girl in a dress walks towards me I thought I saw her looking at me. When she gets close, I hold my hand up and say "I love your outfit." She says thank you but continues walking.Takeaways: I didn't make it energetic enough to stop her in the frontal open. I could have moved slightly in her path, hold both hands up, and then been more energetic with an opener like "Wow, I love your outfit. You look beautiful today."
Approach 6
While walking through the stalls I spot the back of a seemingly cute girl. She has sunglasses on so I can't see her that well, but I decide to follow her and try anyways. It's hard to maneuver around all the people in the way, and I end up needing to follow until she enters an open space I can actually approach her in. I try a pre-open by giving her a very light tap with my finger as I move next to her. She seems taken aback at first, then responds very positively when I compliment her. When we introduce ourselves, she very slightly squeezes my hand and proactively takes off her sunglasses, which seem like strong signs of interest. She ends up seeming like a hot lead by the end.Me: "Excuse me, hi. I just saw you back over there, and I wanted to say I thought you looked absolute enchanting in this dress."
Her: "Thank you very much"
Me: <I introduce myself>
Her: <She introduces herself. Very slightly squeezes my hand.> "Oh wait, you can't even see me right now." <She takes off her sunglasses>
<I notice signs of interest so I test her compliance>
Me: "Let's move a few steps over here, I'm baking in the sun right now." <I hold eye contact when asking then we move over a few steps>
Her: <She moves with me>
Me: "So how are you doing today?" <I ask while walking>
Her: "Good, I'm actually new to this area."
Me: "Oh, where were you from before?"
Her: "Uh, I was in New York."
Me: "New York? So you moved over here...you got tired of all the rain and wanted to see some sunshine?" <Trying to tease her. I thought about instead chase framing that she came here to find a man, but had the instinct not to, because it might be true>
Her: "Um, actually I don't know. I mean, I'm waiting on that, yeah."
Me: "Okay"
Her: "But yeah, um. Yeah. Thanks for approaching me!" <Laughs>
<I probably should have acknowledged this better and teased more, like, "Well of course, when you dress this beautifully how am I supposed to resist?" to chase frame>
Me: "Yeah, What did you move here for? For work?"
Her: "Yeah. <She explains a little bit of her situation>. Are you in tech?"
Me: "I do a little bit of tech related stuff."
Her: "Tell me about, um, yourself."
Me: "Uh, I do engineering." <I don't want to talk to much about myself.>
Her: "You do engineering, okay, I assumed."
Me: "What about you?"
Her: "I'm in law."
Me: "Law...I would not have taken you for a lawyer."
Her: "Really? Uh, what do you think, uh, tell me more..."
Me: "You don't look like the kind of person to cross-examine me in front of a court." <Slightly teasing tone>
Her: "Oh is that, well, I mean, it's hidden, hidden potential."
Me: "Yeah yeah, I think that's really cool. It takes a lot of conviction to be able to deliver that kind of presentation." <Trying to qualify her here>
Her: <Laughs> "We'll see, we'll see! So I've been in this career, well-I'll say when I'm like 'wow!' when I see the tech compensation, maybe I made the wrong career choice"
Me: "Okay, you can't say that as a lawyer." <Teasing her for saying she doesn't make enough money as a lawyer>
Her: <Laughs> "Public interest law, it's not as high."
Me: "Well what got you into being a lawyer? Did you just decide one day, 'I'm going to prosecute criminals!' ?" <Trying to shift to a more emotional topic>
Her: <Laughs> "Well actually, I did have, I was going to catch the train in 15 minutes...but I mean, like..."
Me: "I'm not like, keeping you here..." <Said with a smile to increase comfort, but maybe I shouldn't do this, it might seem insecure with my delivery>
Her: "Oh no, I mean, like...like, I'd be down to chat more. So..."
Me: "Okay, well tell you what. I don't want to make you late for your train. Let's just grab a coffee some other time."
Her: "Sure, sure! I'll give you my number and, like, no pressure, up to you..."
<We exchange phone numbers>
<I don't have the rest of the conversation, but it's mainly some small talk and banter. I mention my brain is a little slow, and she jokes if it's from the heat or from approaching 10 other girls already. Was nonchalant but I could have teased with something like, "Oh no, I've already approached 99 girls, but you're number 100 and that's a lucky number. Just don't think that means it'll be easy to seduce me.">
Her: "Thank you very much"
Me: <I introduce myself>
Her: <She introduces herself. Very slightly squeezes my hand.> "Oh wait, you can't even see me right now." <She takes off her sunglasses>
<I notice signs of interest so I test her compliance>
Me: "Let's move a few steps over here, I'm baking in the sun right now." <I hold eye contact when asking then we move over a few steps>
Her: <She moves with me>
Me: "So how are you doing today?" <I ask while walking>
Her: "Good, I'm actually new to this area."
Me: "Oh, where were you from before?"
Her: "Uh, I was in New York."
Me: "New York? So you moved over here...you got tired of all the rain and wanted to see some sunshine?" <Trying to tease her. I thought about instead chase framing that she came here to find a man, but had the instinct not to, because it might be true>
Her: "Um, actually I don't know. I mean, I'm waiting on that, yeah."
Me: "Okay"
Her: "But yeah, um. Yeah. Thanks for approaching me!" <Laughs>
<I probably should have acknowledged this better and teased more, like, "Well of course, when you dress this beautifully how am I supposed to resist?" to chase frame>
Me: "Yeah, What did you move here for? For work?"
Her: "Yeah. <She explains a little bit of her situation>. Are you in tech?"
Me: "I do a little bit of tech related stuff."
Her: "Tell me about, um, yourself."
Me: "Uh, I do engineering." <I don't want to talk to much about myself.>
Her: "You do engineering, okay, I assumed."
Me: "What about you?"
Her: "I'm in law."
Me: "Law...I would not have taken you for a lawyer."
Her: "Really? Uh, what do you think, uh, tell me more..."
Me: "You don't look like the kind of person to cross-examine me in front of a court." <Slightly teasing tone>
Her: "Oh is that, well, I mean, it's hidden, hidden potential."
Me: "Yeah yeah, I think that's really cool. It takes a lot of conviction to be able to deliver that kind of presentation." <Trying to qualify her here>
Her: <Laughs> "We'll see, we'll see! So I've been in this career, well-I'll say when I'm like 'wow!' when I see the tech compensation, maybe I made the wrong career choice"
Me: "Okay, you can't say that as a lawyer." <Teasing her for saying she doesn't make enough money as a lawyer>
Her: <Laughs> "Public interest law, it's not as high."
Me: "Well what got you into being a lawyer? Did you just decide one day, 'I'm going to prosecute criminals!' ?" <Trying to shift to a more emotional topic>
Her: <Laughs> "Well actually, I did have, I was going to catch the train in 15 minutes...but I mean, like..."
Me: "I'm not like, keeping you here..." <Said with a smile to increase comfort, but maybe I shouldn't do this, it might seem insecure with my delivery>
Her: "Oh no, I mean, like...like, I'd be down to chat more. So..."
Me: "Okay, well tell you what. I don't want to make you late for your train. Let's just grab a coffee some other time."
Her: "Sure, sure! I'll give you my number and, like, no pressure, up to you..."
<We exchange phone numbers>
<I don't have the rest of the conversation, but it's mainly some small talk and banter. I mention my brain is a little slow, and she jokes if it's from the heat or from approaching 10 other girls already. Was nonchalant but I could have teased with something like, "Oh no, I've already approached 99 girls, but you're number 100 and that's a lucky number. Just don't think that means it'll be easy to seduce me.">
Takeaways: This girl seems like she was hoping a man would approach her, so she was immediately warm. I could've done a better job with some of my teasing and been more flirty. I could also cut out the nice stuff like "You don't have to..." or "I'm not keeping you..." and focus on being nonverbally accepting to help build up my sexual edge. I could have used a better answer for "What do you do?". I could have also tried more compliance requests after moving her. And I didn't screen her very much. I did achieve most of my goals however.
Approach 7-13
Since this is already a long field report, I summarize the remaining approaches as they weren't eventful. I was very tired after #6 and wanted to go home, but felt like I could do +1 more. Every time I got a rejection I thought the same thing, "Okay, just +1 more, we'll leave after the next one." The meditation benefits had declined by this point and I was not thinking about goals or tactics other than "just go approach".The results declined drammatically, I got into a couple conversations but the girls ended up ejecting on their own, or after some talking there is a distraction and they smile and continue walking on away from me, maybe with a goodbye. Or I would get rejected immediately.
Takeaways: I was not very present for these approaches and did not focus on my goals. This might have led to a decline in the quality of my approach and my vibe which contributed to rejections or disinterest. It may be good to push myself to grow my stamina, but from a goal tackling perspective it was very inefficient and I might have been better off stopping at 6 and conserving my energy for more studying instead.
Outcome
I approached 13 girls today (only romantic approaches, not counting social approaches or warm ups), +1 more than my high score of 12 in one day.I could work on asking more compliance after moving a girl. I could ask "Tell me about yourself?" or examine a piece of jewelry she has on.
I should also add more screens to my conversations. For starting screens, I want to screen girls for their fashion sense, creativity, artistic interest, health & fitness, discipline, curiosity, and ambitions.
I need to keep working on my answer to "What do you do?"
My teases are phrased a bit clumsily sometimes, I should make them more concise and put extra effort into making my delivery obviously teasing.
I sometimes don't sound very interested when in conversation (worse when I am tired), I should focus on my verbal delivery of interest when asking a question.
I should also be more energetic and give better delivery when doing a frontal open.
I need to consider the balance between expending my energy and pushing myself when it comes to quantity of approaches versus quality of approaches. In the gym, bad reps with high volume when working out are called "junk volume" because they do nothing for you when you would've been better off really focusing on a lower volume of good quality reps. Are social skills the same? Food for thought.
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