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FR  Approach at the mall

Lex

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
May 12, 2014
Messages
79
i didn't did approach for 2 days because i had t my final exam but they are finish so i can concentrate in daygame so today i went with my wing to do some approach we did 10 approach each i wont write about all of them but ill talk about the best interaction i had. So we are walking and i see a gorgeous girl with a fat ass =) (that my type) it goes like that ( ill use a fake name) srry for the writing mistake english isnt the language im the most comfortable with

Me: i just saw you going out from the ardene and i tought you were cute and i had to come talk to you my name is Lex( we shake hand )
Her: ( she blushed and smile ) thx you my name is jasmine
Me:so tell me what are you doing today?
her : i want to buy a hat but i dont know where is the Lids
Me : i know where it is come with me ( she follow me ( is it compliance?)
As we are walking
me : how old are you ?
her : im 19
Me: oh you looked more mature ( i think it was a mistake to say that )
her: ahah dont know
me : i say that as a compliment with a smile/ are you a student ?
her : yes actually i study in architecture in ottawa( we are in a mall in montreal )
me : i hate math im really bad at it. the few math i have in my nursing cause me so much trouble ahah ( that probably the biggest mistake i ever made )
her : aha i love math and im good aha
me: what nationality are you ?
her : im kinda a melting pot of differents race i have french italian and blablabla in my family ( srry dont remember everyone she said )
me : well it does a beautiful mix ( is say that with a smile )
her: aha ( with kinda a awkward smile )
Me : what you like to do for fun ?
her : i dont know i like to do snowboard during winther ahha
Me: arent you cold ? ( she was wearing a tank top but is was raining as fu** outside )
her : ahaha i just got out from my workout
Me : thats good you look fit
her: ahaha
we arrived few meters from Lids a didnt feel taking her phone number cuz she lived far away
Me: Just turn left and youll arrived
her:Thx you its as nice meeting you

What are your tought about this interaction ? what should ive done better ? what was good ? what was wrong ?I do you put sexual tension during daygame ? how do you make a girl ask you questions ?

is there any black guy who approach mostly non-black girl during daygame ? i would like to know how this go for them to compare with me

one thing that i realize about this interaction is that i could have deep dive a little but by asking her question about architecture like why did you choose this ?

Lex
 

Mr.Rob

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jun 16, 2013
Messages
1,897
Re: Approach at the mall

Sup Lex! I don't have much time but here I go!

So first off you're new to this stuff and your taking action so don't beat yourself up for making a few minor mistakes (shit even the best make minor mistakes). It's all about how you handle the mistakes which makes the difference.

Based on the vibe that I'm imagining from this interaction it seems as if you're approval seeking and forcing rapport (a common mistake if you're new), though I could be wrong as all I can see is the dialogue you've written.

Lex said:
Me: oh you looked more mature ( i think it was a mistake to say that )
This is a good example of how you're coming from a frame of approval seeking and forcing rapport. Not because of what you said but because of what you thought after you said it.

Here's the deal, and something I've just recently started internalizing, you can say whatever the fuck you want.
It does not matter as long you keep things moving. I'm training myself out of "nice guy" land and pushing my asshole comfort zone and have been literally saying whatever comes to my mind.

So for instance today I went out and met two girls on the beach and I found out the girl was Jewish. The conversation got a little stale/awkward so I asked her if she was a golddigger (if you don't know what that is, it's a girl who only dates men because they are rich not because they are in love... it has a negative connotation in the states) which is a really rude thing to ask a girl. Obviously I was joking but it was a rude comment to make and guess what? She thought it was funny (she also could have gotten offended and got up and left)!

What this does for me is it shows her I'm not seeking her approval or forcing rapport and therefore shows her that I'm a superior (at least slightly) and not a subordinate.

Women want superiors they get turned off by subordinates.

Wish I had more to pick this apart but you might want to think about this as something to focus on... though like I said I could be wrong since this is the only report I've seen from you and for all I know you could be a pimpin ass mother fucker.

But this is what jumped out at me.

Cheers,

-Rob
 

Lex

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
May 12, 2014
Messages
79
Frame of approval and forcing rapport

Mr Rob thx you very much for the answer

its actually make a lot of the sense cuz lets be honest (im a beginner) if i just met a girl i want to appear like a cool/normal but by doing i keep the interaction safe i dont say anything rude or crazy because i dont want look crazy in front her but by doing this i mark myself as a NICE GUY...and i think that if i say whatever i want ill make myself more polarizing but there is a few thing that id like to know

1- what are the limit? for example saying to a girl flat out that she has a beautiful ass isnt it to much?can you give me few example to know where to start and where not to go?

2-what do you mean by forcing rapport ? do i ask her to many questions without relating to her ?

and I have read your journal Mr Rob and it is pretty good stuff you seem like a very structurated men with a game plan i like that keep going

Lex
 

Smurf

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Apr 7, 2013
Messages
714
Hey Lex! Cool to see another beginner here!

Most if not all of what Rob said is spot on. What I see missing is: breaking the touch barrier, sexual framing, and deep diving.

Try and notice something about the girl that you can touch and ask about, but try something on her arm or wrist so she won't creepy guy label you. A sexual frame would help so that she knows your intentions. There's plenty opportunity for a deep dive here. Like when you ask her about architecture, "why architecture/what made you get into that". Questions like that so you can get to know her. So your analysis of the interaction is good, keep doing that.

Few more things: try and ask for an insta date. You never know. Also, why not get her number? Even if she lives far away you can ask her to come down to you. If a girl likes you, you'd be suprised how much she will go out of her way to comply.

Good start and keep it up!
Jake.
 

Lex

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
May 12, 2014
Messages
79
Jake.D thx you for the advices i think your right i should really try the touch them more i limit myself to the tap i gave them when i approach them

but i would you use sexual framing during the day ? cuz its seem like sexual framing is better when you are in deep dive

Lex
 

Smith

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Sep 14, 2013
Messages
1,016
Hey lex

This report reminds me of myself when I first started out. But don't worry you'll get better =)

Rob wrote:
Here's the deal, and something I've just recently started internalizing, you can say whatever the fuck you want.
It does not matter as long you keep things moving. I'm training myself out of "nice guy" land and pushing my asshole comfort zone and have been literally saying whatever comes to my mind.

I've been doing the same thing as well, and you should too. Just say the first thing that comes out of your mind even with your opener. The point is to go ALL the way to the asshole zone to see it for yourself what's acceptable and what's not, then dial it back a little afterward.

Also something I've been practicing is using a 1-2 seconds pause whenever she finishes her sentence while maintaining sexy eye contact. This will gives her the pressure to also invest in the conversation, not just you keep asking questions and trying to relate.

Smith
 

Lex

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
May 12, 2014
Messages
79
thx you Smith for the advice

Ive try the pause and it is golden when you keep eye contact with a girl for 1-2 second idk if its me or im crazy but i feel a certain sexual tension im gonna go try it again today at the mall to see what are my result with but it is really something im gonna incorporate into my day game

The community is this forum is so amazing if i knew that i would have join month ago =)

Lex
 

Mr.Rob

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jun 16, 2013
Messages
1,897
Re: Frame of approval and forcing rapport

Lex said:
Mr Rob thx you very much for the answer

its actually make a lot of the sense cuz lets be honest (im a beginner) if i just met a girl i want to appear like a cool/normal but by doing i keep the interaction safe i dont say anything rude or crazy because i dont want look crazy in front her but by doing this i mark myself as a NICE GUY...and i think that if i say whatever i want ill make myself more polarizing but there is a few thing that id like to know

1- what are the limit? for example saying to a girl flat out that she has a beautiful ass isnt it to much?can you give me few example to know where to start and where not to go?

2-what do you mean by forcing rapport ? do i ask her to many questions without relating to her ?

and I have read your journal Mr Rob and it is pretty good stuff you seem like a very structurated men with a game plan i like that keep going

Lex

Hey Lex I can give you what I've found in my very limited experience.

1. What are the limits? - Put it this way they're way further out than what you think they are. If you think you might be stepping out of bounds your not, so do it anyway!
Telling a girl she has an amazing ass is fine, in fact I've started many conversations complimenting a girls ass and tits and had things go very smooth (along with a couple bad rejections but that's just how the game goes).

Check this video out https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uRK8eiS_f_g at 1:20-1:40, 3:08-3:44, and 7:00- to the end. Note how in each of these examples the guy opening/interacting with the girl just says whatever is on his mind and is having fun. Note how in the last example he calls the girl a slut to her face (obviously joking) and tries to makeout with her and doesn't give a shit about what she "might think". Though she's still in to him and even says they should meet at a different time in somewhere different.

Don't think that the only reason these guys are getting away with talking to women like this is because it's night game. I do daygame and have been pushing my comfort zone and have found you can talk like this to women at any time of the day. So don't be scared to push your comfort zone.

In fact my homework for you is to do just that. Say some stuff to girls that you feel might get you rejected (I guess for you opening a girl by telling her she has a nice ass) and see what happens. Your goal is to say such ridiculous shit that you do get rejected. In fact I challenge you to say such ridiculous shit that you do get rejected.

2. Forcing rapport is when you work hard to build a connection that simply isn't there. The only reason people do it is because they feel like they need that particular person to like them/go along with them and in reality it pushes people away. An example would be when a girl is disinterested and is giving you short answers and isn't investing in the conversation, and you keep asking questions and making statements in hopes that the conversation will go somewhere.

Now like I said I'm not an expert but just telling you what I personally do. When I meet girls that are clearly not really all that into me, instead of plowing away trying to make something stick I just say "nice meeting you" and walk away. Now when you first start out you're probably going to get a lot of interactions that are like this and you might actually learn something from staying in a conversation that isn't going anywhere I'll leave that up to you.

I felt a little distraught writing about forcing rapport so I hope that made sense. It's like I know when I'm doing it but I don't know exactly how to describe it. Hopefully you get the picture.

Anyway it sounds like you have your Approach anxiety handled so good job there, so go out and say some raunchy shit to girls and talk to them like whores and see what happens. It'll be good for you since it'll teach you not to give a fuck what women think of you and get you to stop seeking their approval (which "real" men don't do... don't worry I've been there too buddy).

Talk at ya down the road.

-Rob
 
the right date makes getting her back home a piece of cake

Lex

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
May 12, 2014
Messages
79
Mr Rob thx you again for the answer and the video got me pump ahah !!!!

Im gonna try to say the most absurb thing to see what happen ill make an other field reports about it cuz i think the more you push your boundaries the more your comfort zone will expand

an other question that pop into my head is do you have any example about banter ? cuz i think make hit the hook point faster?

thx you again
Lex
 
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