- Joined
- Dec 21, 2012
- Messages
- 340
[taken from my journal. Would love some feedback]
I just came back from this monthly nightlife event that happens in my city and I tried a few things out with my approaches. Previously whenever I did the good ol' "i saw you from over there...thought you were [compliment]" in this scene, It never really hooked any girl. They'd just say thank you in a bored tone as if they were hearing the same thing word for word all night. I figured I need to bring value instead of taking value.
This time I saw two girls walking in the plaza while I was talking to my friend who was at his booth selling his artwork.
The taller one, a thin blonde smoking a cigarette and the shorter one a brunette both dressed in forever 21/urban outfitter-esque type clothing accentuating the curves and natural beautiful bodies they were genetically given.
I walked right up to them, arms widespread and took them under my "wings" to have a three-way hug. All coming from a place of confidence and non-neediness. I actually looked past them instead of looking at them so they wouldn't read any neediness on my face and I guess that did the trick. They went along with me hugging them and started laughing as I say: "You both are so adorable!" they thank me and immediately have their eyes locked on me widened. Hooked!
brunette girl had the words "California" printed on her shirt so instead of firing a bunch of questions interview style I just assumed she was from California and said: Ah, so we have a California native here?
her: haha nooo.
me: have you ever been?
her: yes!
me: okay, well next time you go...I need you to stuff me in your suitcase and take me with you. Can you do that for me?
her: haha okay!
me: by the way what's your name?
her: (name)
then I turn my head to the blonde and ask her name.
The rest doesn't even need to be said because I fell right back into my old ways and started asking interview questions. -_-
I bored them right when that happened and the energy I initially created started disappearing.
I'm thinking that I should have been more playful with the whole "California" thing and get a ball bouncing back and forth between us of flirting. I try to take into account the advice of guys here on the forums of not being TOO entertainer-like and appearing like a clown...but let me just say there is a fine line you have to walk on for that.
If i'm not playful enough I'm boring (and my fundamentals are not up to a point where it doesn't matter yet)
If i'm too playful, nobody will take me seriously.
I think the trick is to be playful at the beginning, establishing rapport, bullshitting, and flirting and then move the girl...then deep dive while talking slowly and sexily in your bedroom voice. Get her talking about herself where you're not doing most of the talking. While she talks keep your eyes locked on hers
, never moving them around the room or scanning. Even occasionally look down at her lips...establishing sexual tension.
I need to practice this and have this consistently going perfectly and smoothly and then move on to leading to either a number close or instant date or if i'm feeling bold going to a private place, go for the makeout and lead to SDL. (which is all easy as pie but ultimately depends on me not pussying out when its time to close the deal)
What would really help is for me to know when a girl is open to me meeting her so I'm not wasting my time with these girls who don't invest in conversation (usually over the fact that they they have a bf, husband, or feel dedicated to some guy they're seeing)
Anyway, I ended up moving the girls by commanding them to follow me to an art gallery that was serving punch. I was leading the way to the gallery, we walked in, walked up one flight of stairs. They awed at the artwork on the walls. I commanded them to keep walking because we were almost to the top. As we were going to the second flight of stairs they complained that it was "too much walking" and turned around to go back down the stairs. (the punch bowl was at the top and I wanted to get drinks and sit on the sofas there and talk)
I reached out and tried to pull blonde girl saying: "no, its just right here...up these stairs" but she pulled away and they left. (maybe I came off a bit needy with that)
My guess is that they were just looking out for themselves given that things were starting to seem suspicious. There just happened to be NO other people going into this gallery so it looked like I was bringing them back to my "lair" to "lock them" in my "rape dungeon" and have my way with them and they'd never be seen again. LOL. They're so paranoid...but I get it...I didn't build enough comfort.
Other than that, I tried out my bed-room voice on another girl. Also getting used to the fact that girls DO NOT care that I touch their ass as long as I'm not doing it too early, being a creep, and they're enjoying my presence. I seem to be getting back into the swing of things.
P.S. my voice keeps cracking and going back to sounding high-pitched sometimes. I don't get why this still happens and I'm 21. Is there anything I can do about this because this is embarrassing? :/ women often think I'm younger than I actually am saying I must be 17 or 18 or something. Not cool.
I just came back from this monthly nightlife event that happens in my city and I tried a few things out with my approaches. Previously whenever I did the good ol' "i saw you from over there...thought you were [compliment]" in this scene, It never really hooked any girl. They'd just say thank you in a bored tone as if they were hearing the same thing word for word all night. I figured I need to bring value instead of taking value.
This time I saw two girls walking in the plaza while I was talking to my friend who was at his booth selling his artwork.
The taller one, a thin blonde smoking a cigarette and the shorter one a brunette both dressed in forever 21/urban outfitter-esque type clothing accentuating the curves and natural beautiful bodies they were genetically given.
I walked right up to them, arms widespread and took them under my "wings" to have a three-way hug. All coming from a place of confidence and non-neediness. I actually looked past them instead of looking at them so they wouldn't read any neediness on my face and I guess that did the trick. They went along with me hugging them and started laughing as I say: "You both are so adorable!" they thank me and immediately have their eyes locked on me widened. Hooked!
brunette girl had the words "California" printed on her shirt so instead of firing a bunch of questions interview style I just assumed she was from California and said: Ah, so we have a California native here?
her: haha nooo.
me: have you ever been?
her: yes!
me: okay, well next time you go...I need you to stuff me in your suitcase and take me with you. Can you do that for me?
her: haha okay!
me: by the way what's your name?
her: (name)
then I turn my head to the blonde and ask her name.
The rest doesn't even need to be said because I fell right back into my old ways and started asking interview questions. -_-
I bored them right when that happened and the energy I initially created started disappearing.
I'm thinking that I should have been more playful with the whole "California" thing and get a ball bouncing back and forth between us of flirting. I try to take into account the advice of guys here on the forums of not being TOO entertainer-like and appearing like a clown...but let me just say there is a fine line you have to walk on for that.
If i'm not playful enough I'm boring (and my fundamentals are not up to a point where it doesn't matter yet)
If i'm too playful, nobody will take me seriously.
I think the trick is to be playful at the beginning, establishing rapport, bullshitting, and flirting and then move the girl...then deep dive while talking slowly and sexily in your bedroom voice. Get her talking about herself where you're not doing most of the talking. While she talks keep your eyes locked on hers
, never moving them around the room or scanning. Even occasionally look down at her lips...establishing sexual tension.
I need to practice this and have this consistently going perfectly and smoothly and then move on to leading to either a number close or instant date or if i'm feeling bold going to a private place, go for the makeout and lead to SDL. (which is all easy as pie but ultimately depends on me not pussying out when its time to close the deal)
What would really help is for me to know when a girl is open to me meeting her so I'm not wasting my time with these girls who don't invest in conversation (usually over the fact that they they have a bf, husband, or feel dedicated to some guy they're seeing)
Anyway, I ended up moving the girls by commanding them to follow me to an art gallery that was serving punch. I was leading the way to the gallery, we walked in, walked up one flight of stairs. They awed at the artwork on the walls. I commanded them to keep walking because we were almost to the top. As we were going to the second flight of stairs they complained that it was "too much walking" and turned around to go back down the stairs. (the punch bowl was at the top and I wanted to get drinks and sit on the sofas there and talk)
I reached out and tried to pull blonde girl saying: "no, its just right here...up these stairs" but she pulled away and they left. (maybe I came off a bit needy with that)
My guess is that they were just looking out for themselves given that things were starting to seem suspicious. There just happened to be NO other people going into this gallery so it looked like I was bringing them back to my "lair" to "lock them" in my "rape dungeon" and have my way with them and they'd never be seen again. LOL. They're so paranoid...but I get it...I didn't build enough comfort.
Other than that, I tried out my bed-room voice on another girl. Also getting used to the fact that girls DO NOT care that I touch their ass as long as I'm not doing it too early, being a creep, and they're enjoying my presence. I seem to be getting back into the swing of things.
P.S. my voice keeps cracking and going back to sounding high-pitched sometimes. I don't get why this still happens and I'm 21. Is there anything I can do about this because this is embarrassing? :/ women often think I'm younger than I actually am saying I must be 17 or 18 or something. Not cool.
