Lately I have been at a loss on how to approach women wearing earphones/ on their phones, usually with women on their phones, I tell excuse me and open them and with women on earbuds I wave to them and then open them, with these approached my anxiety has been skyrocketing more so than approaching other women, I guess this is because if I get blown off, more people would get to know and be kinda embarrassing, how do most of you guys approach women like this?
Approaching women who are wearing earbuds
- Thread starter dark hawk
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I've approached a lot of women like this... it's really not a big deal at all. Some have totally blown me off but most of them will stop, pull their ear buds out, and find out what I want to say to them.
What I do is just full stop them, make sure they're paying attention and then do whatever opener you were going to do.
Sometimes, I'll just say, "hey... hey... hey" look them straight in the eyes and nod my head up... and then I wait for them to say "what?" or pull their earbuds out... either one is usually an acknowledgement that they aren't listening to their earbuds anymore.
It's actually a really good pattern interrupt for them because they're fully out of the world they were just in and now are totally paying attention to what you have to say, so a lot of times it can be better if they're wearing ear buds.
What I do is just full stop them, make sure they're paying attention and then do whatever opener you were going to do.
Sometimes, I'll just say, "hey... hey... hey" look them straight in the eyes and nod my head up... and then I wait for them to say "what?" or pull their earbuds out... either one is usually an acknowledgement that they aren't listening to their earbuds anymore.
It's actually a really good pattern interrupt for them because they're fully out of the world they were just in and now are totally paying attention to what you have to say, so a lot of times it can be better if they're wearing ear buds.
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Skills suggested over on my journal to get her attention first and then pretend you're taking off some imaginary earphones. And she will follow suit. I've tried that and it works nicely.
Sometimes they will only remove one earphone. So something to be aware of is, their hearing is still going to be muffled. Especially if it's a busy street with lots going on. Have you ever tried daygaming with a muffled ear or with earphones on? You might notice it's a little harder to feel immersed in the interaction. So be sure to enunciate extra clearly and maybe even speak a little louder than you usually would.
Sometimes they will only remove one earphone. So something to be aware of is, their hearing is still going to be muffled. Especially if it's a busy street with lots going on. Have you ever tried daygaming with a muffled ear or with earphones on? You might notice it's a little harder to feel immersed in the interaction. So be sure to enunciate extra clearly and maybe even speak a little louder than you usually would.
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- Aug 1, 2013
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Thanks! I've wondered about that myself. I take the train to and from work everyday and wear earbuds and mask the whole time.
I'm still waiting for things to pick in that regard (50-60 people per car vs. 5-10 per car now on the train), lol.
I'm still waiting for things to pick in that regard (50-60 people per car vs. 5-10 per car now on the train), lol.