FR Attempted "end of the night" pickups for the first time

[Scofield]

So tonight I went to a popular club. I've been there once before and hated it but decided to give it another try, thinking it might be better/less busy on a friday night. It wasn't any better, it's a very popular club but it's one of those that are great for dancing but terrible for pickup. 60% dance floor, 15% vip booths, 15% bar and 10% bathrooms....no where to sit and it's loud all throughout. I talk to a bunch of girls but strike out with all of them.

So this places closes at 1:30 but there are places on the block that don't close til 2 when the security starts moving people out of the streets (it's a popular block with lots of bars/clubs).

Girl 1: So I walk down the strip and I see a girl, a guy and another girl sitting on an outside couch outside of a club. I can't get into the roped off area, but I perch myself against the couch. The 2nd girl is talking to the guy and they're smoking, the other girl is just my type, white, black hair, pretty and big boobs. When I lean against the couch I manage to catch her eye, she smiles at me and I open her by asking why she isn't inside. I then ask if she's having a good night and introduce myself before beginning to get into more serious convo and deep diving. She seems decently into me and we talk a lot. Eventually I really have to pee, and there's a pizza place next door. She mentions that she hasn't eaten all night so I tell her that I need to go to the pizza place and ask her if she wants to join me. She asks her friends and they say they are down....and then she changes her mind and squeezes her boobs and says "these boobs don't have any money". I decide against offering to pay for her for the same reason I try not to buy girls drinks. I tell her I just have to use the restroom and I'll come right back. But then I ask for her number in case we get separated and she says it SUPER fast before I even get my phone out lol. I take my phone out and she says "just use the bathroom and come right back, i'll be right here!" i have my phone out at this point and i just leave it in front of her. She is hesitant and says "i never normally give my number out!" and I just give her a sexy smile and leave my phone in front of her and she relents, grabs my phone and enters her number. I then go to the bathroom and go back, deciding that I could offer to split a meal with her and pay for it instead of just offering to pay for her meal. So I head back outside and there's another guy there with her. They're chatting, but it seems like he knows her but they aren't together ie just friends. Either way I didn't care and positioned myself again, they have a break in the convo and I put my hand gently on her back and she turns back to me. I say "you know, I'm actually kinda hungry, want to split something at that pizza place, i'll pay" and she says "i can't go without my friends! but i'll ask them" so then she asks her friends and her female friend declines. I say "you don't need them!" and her friend says "she needs me...and i'm not in the mood sorrry!" So I change the subject and keep talking to the girl. The guy she's sitting with starts feeling awkward and gets up to leave and the other girl says "hey don't leave!" and then he comes back and they decide to dance. The girl ends her convo with me and gets up to go back inside to dance with her friends without saying so much as a goodbye. Shortly after as I was headed back to my car I saw her leaving the club and stopped by to shake her hand and say it was nice to meet her and she agrees, I was going to talk to her a bit more but her friend pulls her away to take a photo and I leave.

Girl 2: So after girl 1 left me, I saw 3 good looking girls sitting on a slab of concrete with 1 guy standing up. I decide to go for it, and sit next to the only girl who has an open spot next to her. I start talking to her, asking her how her night is, she is very friendly and we talk for a while. The security guards then come by and ask us to move over to the benches. The girls get up, the girl I've been talking to turns to me and I put my hand on her back and say "I'll join you, if you don't mind" and she agrees. We sit on the bench and talk for a couple more minutes before the guy that's with them comes over and she introduces him to me as her "boyfriend". I really didn't get the vibe that they were together but I go with it and talk to both of them. Eventually I start talking to just the girl again and the guy says "hey, mind if I talk to my girlfriend for a bit?" and I see no option but to relent so I say my goodbye and she gets up and moves to the other side of the bench with him.

Girl 3: So I start heading back to my car. I see a very pretty girl in front of me, she has trouble crossing the street so as I approach behind her I say "you gotta be careful crossing those streets!" and she turns her head back and says "haha thanks...". I ask her if she has a good night and she says "what?" and then I see her outfit and realize that she's probably a bartender and ask "oh, you work at one of those places don't you?" and she kinda ignores me so I say "which one of those places do you work at?" and she says "yeah....I work at [inaudible] and then she starts heading in another direction, towards a parking garage (I parked on the street) and I tell her to have a good night and she says likewise. I think this one was just a bit of the case that she was worried that I might be dangerous, she just worked a long shift and was tired, and she hadn't been drinking at all.

Anyways, I see the value in this, I wish it had gone a little better though.

 

[Tyme2k]

Re: FR: Attempted "end of the night" pickups for the first

Don't base having a good night on results. Respect the process and keep approaching. I would say you had a great night, you approached mixed sets and did not react to shit tests. You keep pimping like this and you will pull.

 

[ChalupaBatman]

Re: FR: Attempted "end of the night" pickups for the first

Nice man! You may have not had the results you wanted but what you did takes a ton of courage. I hope to be able to approach like this one day. Did you go out alone?

 

[Scofield]

Re: FR: Attempted "end of the night" pickups for the first

Thank you, the girl who's number I did get hasn't replied to my 2 texts at all though....doubt she'll reply at all.

Nice man! You may have not had the results you wanted but what you did takes a ton of courage. I hope to be able to approach like this one day. Did you go out alone?

Yes, I go out alone about 95% of the time now. Occasionally I can get a friend to join me, but they really do not like clubs. I still invite em, but I'm more surprised when they do go than when they don't.

 

[Chase]

Re: FR: Attempted "end of the night" pickups for the first

Scofield-

Great work taking your first stab at a little nighttime street game. There are some mistakes in here I'll point out that are mostly because you're new and in an uncomfortable situation, but they'll work out naturally as you get more used to approaching like this and get your initial conversation bolted down tighter.

I then ask if she's having a good night and introduce myself before beginning to get into more serious convo and deep diving. She seems decently into me and we talk a lot. Eventually I really have to pee, and there's a pizza place next door.

This seems good, up to a point, but I get the feeling it went on too long. With street game, you need to be moving fast... there's a point in every interaction that passes where it feels like a guy is just "hanging around" and doesn't really know what to do, and in street game that point passes pretty early on. I get the sense here (and with the next interaction) that you passed that point and kept hanging around, and that's why the receptions changed from warm to cool.

She mentions that she hasn't eaten all night so I tell her that I need to go to the pizza place and ask her if she wants to join me. She asks her friends and they say they are down....and then she changes her mind and squeezes her boobs and says "these boobs don't have any money".

That isn't something a girl will say to a guy she likes / is very attracted to / is feeling like is a little out of her league, which means she's under the impression that you're hanging around because you want her. Good you moved to bounce her, but this needed to happen earlier for it to work properly.

But then I ask for her number in case we get separated and she says it SUPER fast before I even get my phone out lol.

She's trying not to give it to you. At this point, the interaction is ending on a bad note, and that'll be what she remembers most if you do trade numbers with her somehow anyway - it's lost. You can bow out graciously here, and say, "Well, that's too fast for me. I think I'll take that as my cue to head off, then."

Girl 2: So after girl 1 left me, I saw 3 good looking girls sitting on a slab of concrete with 1 guy standing up. I decide to go for it, and sit next to the only girl who has an open spot next to her. I start talking to her, asking her how her night is, she is very friendly and we talk for a while. The security guards then come by and ask us to move over to the benches. The girls get up, the girl I've been talking to turns to me and I put my hand on her back and say "I'll join you, if you don't mind" and she agrees.

The main mistake here is going with them when they move. At that point, you're following, and clearly chasing - the girls are in control, you are not. This NEVER works out except in the (rare) occasion where you kind of hang back and the girl really fights to have her come join them and she's really taking great care of you and totally focused on you the entire time.

What you'll normally want to do instead is propose an alternative: "Hey, how about we go grab some late-night chow?" and get them moving according to your plan. Or, if things are going very well, you can grab her wrist and whisper, "Do you think your friends would object if we stole off into the night to have some food and talk more privately?"

We sit on the bench and talk for a couple more minutes before the guy that's with them comes over and she introduces him to me as her "boyfriend". I really didn't get the vibe that they were together but I go with it and talk to both of them. Eventually I start talking to just the girl again and the guy says "hey, mind if I talk to my girlfriend for a bit?" and I see no option but to relent so I say my goodbye and she gets up and moves to the other side of the bench with him.

He sounds like a pretty socially-attuned guy. Could've been her boyfriend, coud've just been a very socially calibrated friend who was coming in to help her out. Either way, it sucks when you've gotten yourself planted into a situation like this where you're clearly chasing and then you get pushed out. I went through it plenty of times when I was starting out... you've just got to learn to always keep yourself leading and not fall into situations where you're the one in pursuit, because it's too easy to get left as the odd-man out, feeling awkward and pushed to the side when they're calling the shots and you're trying to hang.

Girl 3: So I start heading back to my car. I see a very pretty girl in front of me, she has trouble crossing the street so as I approach behind her I say "you gotta be careful crossing those streets!" and she turns her head back and says "haha thanks...". I ask her if she has a good night and she says "what?" and then I see her outfit and realize that she's probably a bartender and ask "oh, you work at one of those places don't you?" and she kinda ignores me so I say "which one of those places do you work at?" and she says "yeah....I work at [inaudible] and then she starts heading in another direction, towards a parking garage (I parked on the street) and I tell her to have a good night and she says likewise. I think this one was just a bit of the case that she was worried that I might be dangerous, she just worked a long shift and was tired, and she hadn't been drinking at all.

Concur. The initial conversation from you is a little soft, but if a girl is into you that won't matter and she'll hook regardless. It also sounds like you approached from behind, which you usually do not want to do, especially at night. Come around the side of her - run up to her side, if you need to - and open her that way, so you're a lot less startling and she doesn't spend a few milliseconds in adrenaline-juiced "danger mode" preparing herself to face this stranger she's turning around to see and assess whether he's a threat or not.

Female bartenders are also a lot more skeptical at the end of the night than most girls - the combination of not being drunk + having been hit on by aggressive drunk guys all night puts them on high alert. They'll assess you VERY quickly to decide if you seem like a smooth, charming, dashing man, or a clumsy drunk guy hitting on her / potential rapist. Much of the time, you really need to be on your A-game to overcome these girls' initial resistance at this time of night.

Anyways, I see the value in this, I wish it had gone a little better though.

You did fine. This was your first attempt at it, and you were doing it by yourself without having seen how anyone else does it. That's something not a lot of guys will do, so props to you for doing it.

As you do it more, you'll get your technique down, and start finding it a lot easier - just remember to be moving quickly and having girls do things on your terms rather than you doing things on theirs, and you'll get it working right.

Chase