What's new

FR  Best Day Yet at the Mall!

AsianPersuasion

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 7, 2012
Messages
234
After my job interview at Denny's, I went to the nearby mall to see how much experience I could accumulate through the day. I was in the area, and it was the best outlet I have found within this little suburb.

Girl: After letting 3 opportunities slip by because of the Approach Anxiety I had gotten from yesterday, I saw a girl sitting alone at a caribou table. I said, "Okay, you are far too cute for me not to come say hi! I'm AP. Are you here alone?" She was actually here with her boyfriend, who eyed me from an adjacent store, but after that, I was cured and got going all over again.

Group of Girls #1: I let another opportunity pass before I approached these girls. The girls I let go were also in a group of two, and I pondered how I would handle two girls at once for a good while as I walked. At last, I saw a group of girls checking out shoes and said "Okay, you two are way too cute for me not to come say hi! I'm AP."
This is the first time I cold approached and directly opened a girl in the mall that I was able to converse with, but the conversation never got anywhere.. I tried asking what school they went to and commented that I was trying to find an outfit for being matchmaker for a future high, but that didn't lead anywhere..
I'm still at a loss on how to make a direct cold approach turn into a good conversation, so if anybody has any tips, I'm open for advice! I should have at least tried asking for a number.. They seemed interested, but it didn't get anywhere.

Success #1: This was the energetic girl I previously tried to pick up a long time ago at the same Mall. She was sorting boxes, and we recognized each other instantly, and I commented that I liked the song that was playing. We had a small conversation about music after that because it turned out she liked the song too, and we both agreed that if Biggie and Tupac were alive right now, the current rappers would all be working at McDonalds.. I then asked her if she could show me to a red button-down shirt in hopes she would come with me and we could talk more.
She skipped and jumped over boxes as she went over there, and I said, "Has anyone ever told you how cute your energy is?" She smiled, but when I began looking at the shirts, she went back to sorting boxes. I didn't have enough money to buy their shirt, so after looking around at their button downs for a while, I went back to the girl, and said,
"I was wondering.. Are you single?"
She smiled, and said "Yes I am!"
"I was wondering if you wanted to go get some caribou with me sometime! We could grab a drink and go exploring somewhere."
"I could do that!"
"What's your favorite Caribou drink? You look to me like a Caramel Cooler person. Am I right or wrong?" (That was a blind guess.)
"Haha, oh my God, I just had a Caramel Cooler yesterday!"
When I asked for her number, she said that she wasn't allowed to give her number away on the job. She pondered when she would be off work, but she didn't know, so she had me friend her on facebook first, and then when she was off the job, she'd give me her number. I've friended her. Still no confirmation yet, but this looks like a success to me.

Group of Girls #2: I used the same opener as I did on the last two girls, only these ones didn't stick around and make as much of an effort to converse with me. These two ended the interaction far quicker than the other two.

Success #2: This one worked at Kohl's I think. She was working the register with a more attractive girl that looked more my age. She asked if I needed help finding anything, so I asked if one of them could help me find a red button-up shirt, hoping for the other girl. I didn't get exactly what I wished for, but I decided to work with what I got, so I started a conversation with her.. I first asked her how old she was, and she replied that she was 21. I then gave her a flirty glance and asked her to guess how old I was.
"Well, before we started talking, I would have figured you were 19 or 21 or something.. But now I'd guess somewhere around 24 or 28." (I'm 17.)
She commented that she one drunk guy at the bar guessed her age at 29, and how she felt insulted by the comment. I then commented at how sad it was that most guys couldn't pick their balls up to talk to a 100 pound girl unless they were under the influence, but said that the guy had good taste. I then led the conversation to what her career dreams were, and in the process, I asked if she was single.. She had a boyfriend in her home town in Wisconsin three hours away, but I decided not to give up. We continued talking about her career goals, and I noted that she was young and attractive and still had plenty of time for deciding a path. Her eyes lit up and she smiled as she thanked me, and then commented on how nice it was to talk to somebody after being in the store since 8 am.
As we got to the shirts, I commented that I was a bit too distracted by the cute salesgirl to look for clothing, and she smiled and blushed. I then asked,
"Would you get in trouble for giving your number away on the job?"
She said no, and I punched her number into my phone.
"We should go get some Caribou sometime," I said, "What's your favorite drink there?"
She told me that there was no Caribou where she was from, and I made an exaggerated shocked expression. She then told me she liked Mocha's from Starbucks though, and every time her friends took her to Caribou she liked it.
"Okay, awesome! Well I'll get you more acquainted with Caribou then, we can grab drinks and go for a walk in say... St. Paul?"
She then asked me if I could show her around because she didn't know the area well. I offered to be her tour guide, and before she left, tried to tell me when she'd be working, but I've forgotten.
This one might be interesting, because a girl in college would have tons more to talk about, and hopefully a place to herself ;) This would prevent me from needing to try to pull car sex, which has serious downsides that I discovered in my last date... She can't get in trouble if I lie about my age, right?

Girl #2: Same opener as the first girl, but she was with her mom at Rainbow and she had a boyfriend.

I noticed today how fruitless my direct cold approaches were when it came to conversation, but how well situational attempts went. Hopefully I find a way around my problems with conversation after a direct approach, but for now, it looks like I've just learned how to handle hired guns in the store :)
 
the right date makes getting her back home a piece of cake

Laowai

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Dec 7, 2012
Messages
80
"Okay, you two are way too cute for me not to come say hi! I'm AP."

You must single out one of them, unless of course, you're going for a threesome with both of them. No wonder you get stuck in conversation here, because they don't know which one of them it is you're hitting on, and you don't know which one of them it is you're hitting on.

I'm still at a loss on how to make a direct cold approach turn into a good conversation, so if anybody has any tips, I'm open for advice! I should have at least tried asking for a number.. They seemed interested, but it didn't get anywhere.

1) Direct approach. "Hey, I'm AP, what's your name?", shake hands.

2) "So, what are you out doing now?" - Transitioning, and checking for her logistics and the time frame of the interaction. Is she meeting somebody soon? Well, then better get her contacts fast before her friend shows up.

3) Tell her what you're out doing (fx buying a present for your grandmother) and shortly fluff around this.

4) What does she spend most of her time on? Is she a student / working? ... That's awesome, because blah-blah (you relate to what she is saying and tell her something about you). Qualify her for this.

5) Lock-in and compliance-testing. "Hey, we're blocking the street for people. Let's go over here" - you lead her away from the street and lean up against the wall while talking to her.

6) More connection-building. After sharing what each of you do for a living (studying / working / etc), you ask her about her personal hobbies. Qualify her for this.

7) Seed an activity you want to do and number-close.Time-bridge with specific activity on a specific date. This is essentially another compliance test to show you where you are in your sarge / how interested she really is. You can always change the date afterwards.

8) "If you're not busy now, maybe you can help me look for that present for my grandmother." Then you move her and start walking around with her. Again, this is another compliance test.

9) Instant date. "Hey, let's go get something to drink for 15 minutes. After that I gotta go", then deepen the connection on the instant date.

10) Eject, meet new girl, rinse and repeat.

So, conversation-wise, from direct approaches, it always goes like this 1) What are both of you out doing, 2) What does she do for a living, 3) personal hobbies. The conversation gets more and more intimate and personal.
 

AsianPersuasion

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 7, 2012
Messages
234
And there's exactly what I needed! Thanks brother. I'll try this on the next girl I directly open.. All of my successes have been girls that work in clothing stores, so it'll be great to get a cold approach success.

I'll let you know how things turn out!
 
Top