Bounce Back

[HoofHearted]

Hi team,

I've taken a lot of L's recently. I don't remember shit being this hard (but kinda expected it)

Now overall things are actually going really well

But i wanted some feedback on what YOU do when shit just isn't panning out, and how to keep positive momentum, and keep your head up?

One thing I do is improve something. This might mean cleaning/tidy home, or lifting heavier, or making someone else feel good vibes.

Any further tips?


Thanks

 

[Chase]

@HoofHearted,

Yeah, you'll have stretches like that, especially when getting into the swing of things or shaking off a lot of rust.

Anything that feels like a 'win' at something real world will help -- thus why tidying up, lifting heavier, giving good vibes, etc., works.

Other things along those lines that help:

• Doing creative work that gives a feeling of succeeding: making a small clay sculpture, writing a short story, painting a small painting
  
  
• Attending a class and really trying hard & learning in it: tennis, archery, martial arts, surfing, snowboarding, bartending school, etc.
  
  
• Taking on a new project at work and kicking its butt
  
  
• Find social circle activities where you can be around good-looking women socially and have positive social interactions with them. Could be a friend group dinner with good-looking female friends in attendance... could be a class with hot girls in it (acting and modeling classes are great for this; others that can be good: dance classes, tennis class... often Spanish class for whatever reason)
  
  
• Going out to socialize and talking to lots of people, NOT focused on picking up girls, just building tons of momentum (and maybe get the spill-over effect going for you). Also see Alek's series on fixing & using low momentum

Things to avoid: anything digital (movies, TV shows, video games, social media), as that gets you out of action-taking in the real world and sucks you farther away. Books are okay though for a recharge; they just won't build up the winner effect like the other things do.

Mainly you are looking for things to trigger that little confidence boost the winner effect produces. As you build up wins, your hormone levels adjust, confidence rises, and suddenly you start feeling excellent and ready to take on the world again.

It can seem a little slow when you want to be amped up right now, but after a week or two of building positive/victorious experiences you can frequently turn around momentum if you're deliberate about it.

Chase

 

[Skills]

Hi team,

I've taken a lot of L's recently. I don't remember shit being this hard (but kinda expected it)

Now overall things are actually going really well

But i wanted some feedback on what YOU do when shit just isn't panning out, and how to keep positive momentum, and keep your head up?

One thing I do is improve something. This might mean cleaning/tidy home, or lifting heavier, or making someone else feel good vibes.

Any further tips?


Thanks

this happened to me a while back, sometimes it happens, i call it a reality distortion....

Observations - The reality distortion

I always write with analogies, I think it make stuff more understandable.... So you have this guys that have accomplished everything in their field "Bill gates" "steve jobs" "jordan" etc.. etc... Some of them if they are frank they tell you, how depress they were after they accomplish their...

www.skilledseducer.com

^ with that being said, my friend if you are honest with yourself your fundamentals are not the same as when you were having success, i know you are working on them, but if your fundamentals not there is going to be harder...

 

[HoofHearted]

Yeah I had a period of sadness with a lot of weight gain.

But things are better now and i am grateful every day

Thanks for the responses lads, the suggestions are pure gold, will incorporate them and climb my way back to the ladykiller that i once was i guess

 

[Rakehell]

I like this thread.

Recently i’ve been journaling out stuff even though I was reluctant to in the past. It’s helpful to recall positive moments in periods of self doubt.

If you don’t journal though the concept still remains, and you can think back on positive things/qualities about yourself and what you’ve accomplished and take pride in.

The journaling helps because where your moods go your thoughts tend to follow and it can be harder to remember things in a positive light.

Your perception of events switches, which can be the cause of the funk in the first place.

 

[HoofHearted]

That is a truly wonderful suggestion. Thank you.

 

[HoofHearted]

I wanted to resurrect, its a great topic.

I find momentum is down at the moment. I know how to roll again, and ive had an incredible winter so far, frankly unreal.

I wanted to mention the flipside of the coin. While riding the wave, there happened to be a few things I did that were, uh, not great. I was pretty mean to a few girls, not overly intentionally, but the outcome was the same nonetheless. I left em in bad ways. Kind of due to growing pains, lack of awareness and anger. Thankfully I was able to mend these fences and apologize successfully.

Kind of the flipside of a bounceback or maintaining high, good energy seems to be avoiding or just NOT doing shitty things. I think these events are momentum killers.

 

[Beck Bass]

Kind of the flipside of a bounceback or maintaining high, good energy seems to be avoiding or just NOT doing shitty things. I think these events are momentum killers.

Oh yeah, but shit happens, you know, as long as you really wanna be a better person and do your best to apologize and not do it again, it's all good. You gotta accept that some bad stuff is just gonna happen, no matter what, and just try to minimize it, your part in causing those bad things, and how they affect you as well