FR Date Night

[myshkinrush]

Hey all!

I'm new here and I really hope I'm following the guidelines. Here's the story...I met this hottie on the plane and we started chatting it up. She gave me her number and I gave her mine. I didn't really bother calling her because to be honest, I thought she was out of my league. Now, I'm not bad looking at all, and I actually do get hit on quite a bit, but totally ignore women cuz I just wasn't ready. And here's the thing, I've been in a relationship for 10 years and I have been totally faithful! I feel very strangled by my relationship and I think I'm going to call it quits.

Back to the story..so she texts me first with some random questions and I reply back (again, no seduction or flirting). So then one day, I just call her up and ask her out over the phone and ask her for her availability and we set a date. She sends me a text telling me she's marked my calendar on this date and sends me a pic of her calendar date with my name on it and a 2 hour timeslot. I jokingly say.."I only get two hours" and she replies.."Well no, but how many do you want" and then i reply with some shakespearean quote about time and how lovers lose themselves or some bullshit, i forget. She loves it and says, I can have her for as long as I want.

So i pick her up near her work and give her a hug. I work in sales, so I'm usually dressed up in a suit (without a tie). She sees me and immediately says.."wow" and then says.."I'm wearing jeans" and I explain that a suit is pretty much my work uniform. Not sure if she was saying "wow" to me as in.."he's hot!" or 'wow, you're totally wearing a suit"

I ask her if she wants to start with drinks (alcohol) or coffee (it's 5PM), I didn't blatantly want to suggest drinks so she said Coffee and I moved her to this coffee place, opened the door. I'm generally a very confident guy, so I dont take a backseat... I was assertive in asking the barista, what kind of coffee they had, and wasn't impressed and said to my date:"Ok we're out here" and moved her out to a chocolate store where we both had espressos. We also ordered chocolate and we split each piece in half (I chew on a piece and then handed her the half, and vice-versa). We had some good convo about where she's from, etc. Because i'm in Sales, I can be good at framing the conversation to be all about the other person more than me. We ate, drank and she loved it and I knew that I totally broke the ice.

After this, I told her i'm taking to her a dinner place which was a surprise and she said.."i love surprises" I really wanted to hold her hand or have her put her hand in my arm as we walked to my car, but didnt have courage. Give me a break guys, I'm rusty! First date in 10 years! (been in a committed relationship, whaddaya gonna do!)

We drive to this place that's about 35 minutes away...She asked if i knew where I was going and I look at her, smile and say.."Of course!" and she giggled and said.."I love that i don't have to think about anything right now"

We get to the place and she's so damn impressed and is asking tons of question about it..I order for the both of us and don't ask her what she wants...i just order lol. as we sit down, i also get drinks (i'm spoiling this girl..yes, I paid for everything - I'm new remember!)

And as she gets ready to sit, she was planning on sitting opposite of me and I tell her.."no come sit here, next to me, she smiled and said.."even better". At one point during the dinner, I say she has to try this..and feed her, which i think she was surprised by, but i know she loved the fact that I fed her! and later in the dinner, she actually fed me! ha! We just chattted for hours..doesn't end there.

I take her to a dessert place, we get drinks and we start flirting. I could tell she didn't really want it to end but was complaining about work the next day and having to get up early. I was sitting on the outside and it was late like midnight and she had a 45 minute drive home from where we were, so I said..alright, it's late you should get home. and she says "So you're going to let me go, huh"

I drive her to her car, walk her to her door and give her a big hug and tell her it was fun and she tells me she had an great time! I make no mention of "we should do this another time" I just wanted her to keep guessing what I was thinking. and here it is..I DID NOT KISS THIS HER! Man! feeling sucks!

So anyways..next day like 9 or 930ishAM, she texts me
Her: what was the name of the place we went to last night?
Me: what do i get for telling you
Her: "umm I dont know"
Me: well then, you better keep thinking about it
Her: Geez!

I dont respond and a few hours later, she sends me a pic of a coupon that says.."this coupon entitles you to...." get the picture..
Her: Here, use this wisely!
Me: (after about 2 hours) So, do i get to wish for more coupons?
Her: Ha! funny! I didn't think of that.

Personally, I'm not a big fan of texting back and forth. So I called her two days later! We speak for about 15 minutes, mostly her talking about her work and she asked me about my work. Then I ask her if she had a good time and she excitedly said yes and I probed her and asked what she liked..and she mentioned a few of things. and She asked me if I had a good time and I said yes and "you know, I don't think I told you, but Yes, i had really good time" Then we were talking about something and I said "Hey, i gotta go i have to take this call and quickly said goodbye and hung up". There was no call, I just wanted to keep her on her toes.

I could tell she was shocked that I abruptly cut it off. And she texts me apologizing for the fact that she may not have been focused cuz she was driving..but she was definitely very focused. Then she texts me 15 minutes later asking me to call her back when i have a chance. I don't, instead we exchange some texts and she texted me two days in a row with "Good morning" and I reply back with the usual. It was raining badly this day and I said..

Me: Gosh the weather sucks
Her: I know..i just want to be home with cuddled up in a blanket watching a movie
Me: I can provide the Movie if you can provide the Blanket
Her: LOL - so clever you are
fifteen minutes later
Her: So, what movie do you suggest
Me: Well, since you like surprises so much, I'll tell you when I get there

Then I got really busy for work and I couldn't keep up with the text messages and the above pretty much deflated.

And then we picked up on the text message later in the day with her asking me what I'm up to. (I have to delete the texts from my phone (relationship not officially over yet))

- i called her a day later and it went to voicemail - left a voicemail. She calls back, I'm busy, I don't pick up. I call her back and she doesn't pick up, i leave a voicemail. I'm thinking..this girl is definitely playing me.. in other words, i think she has game also.

She texts me the next day
Her: So are we going to be playing phone tag or what! We should speak
I dont respond
Her: So how's your morning going..

So this is where it ended, I've been busy, I haven't responded to her text in two days nor have I called her. I need to move on this fast! I was thinking of calling her and just setting up the next date.

What do you awesome gentlemen think? How's it going? What should be my next steps?! Please help, I'm grateful in advance.


Some history: I've never ever read up on dating, but I've been pretty good with girls (I flirt here and there, but trust me guys, i'm faithful! I consider myself good looking and my friends always comment on how I'm the "suave guy in the group". People think I'm very outgoing, which I am. But I never actually learned game or anything like that. And I want to make sure I do this right without FUing it up! I totally want to sleep with this girl cuz she's HOT!! At the same time, Abundance is my best friend, so I'm not tied her (haven't returned her calls or texts - but I know i need to soon!). Soon I'll be doing the 10 day newbee assignment. I say this with full humility:I really want to master this because I don't think I'm bad, but I wanna be good!


Thank you!

 

[Vash]

Re: FR Date Night

You should have slept with her the first time you went out with her. Her saying "So you're going to let me go, huh?" means she wanted more, and was hoping you'd take her back to your place and fuck her.

Seriously dude, just sleep with her already. Don't worry about trying to fuck it up, because you'll fuck it up for sure if you DON'T sleep with her. Kiss her next date, and bring her back to your place afterwards. Also, that texting should be geared towards getting another date with her. Any cutesy convo through text can be done in person to greater effect.

 

[Tyme2k]

Re: FR Date Night

Great synopsis. I learned a lot about you in this FR. You seem to be old fashioned, this is a huge mistake. All the date crap, over the top gestures and plans are unessesary and will make her look at you as relationship material.

I also learned you are a natural leader and have great "natural" game. That said, if you want to get good at this it will be a short hop step skip(correct euphamism?) to fulfillment.

The main thing you have to remember is when you are with the girl you MUST lead her to sex. This is her biological goal as a human and she wants it more than both of you can even imagine. Use this to your advantage and give her what she wants.

Make the next date, bring her to your place. I would suggest make her COME to ur place as the date. Escalate asap and you don't let her leave until you've had sex. Of course if she is sternly saying "NO!" let her leave, but if she says, "no we shouldn't" or "I have to go home" agree but continue to take her clothes off. She will thank you later, they ALL do!

One thing that will autmatically boost attraction for you is the fact that you are busy. You have a life established and don't NEED a girl. That makes you miles ahead of most guys learning game who have to build themselves as a man. You, my friend, are already there.

 

[myshkinrush]

Re: FR Date Night

Awesome advice Tyme2K. You write so well and your kind words definitely have inspired me more. I truly appreciate it.

So update: I texted her last night at 1130PM:

Me: "Hey I was busy this weekend. When may I see you again?"
(Next morning at 925AM - I thought she would wait until at least the evening to respond considering I took 3 days to respond to her - i'm still trying to understand if this girl has game (In our first date, she told me she was going through a divorce and complained that the guy she is/was married to was not a man and immature - just a bit of info for you)
Her: I'm in another town (3 hours away)
Me: Pick you in 10 minutes?
Her: LOL
(Some other random texts - she is frustrated with her work and is complaining about some shit. She sends me a pic of some nice scenery and says "So pretty")

Me: You're pretty! Stop being frustrated and smile.
Her: I analyze everything and take failure in stride.
(few minutes later)
Her: "I'm kinda intense" "LOL" - (I dont respond to that but I'm still left thinking what this means)
(few hours later)
Me: You still haven't answered my question (I'm referring to the 2nd date)
Her: Good question. let me get back to you, Possibly Wednesday?
(she sends some other random texts and asks me what something means, i respond back to her question.)

Tyme2K: You have to understand, i don't like texting - gets old quickly for me and you're right, i AM old fashioned, i dont like FB, Twitter or any social media - I enjoy real human interaction and appreciate mine and other people's privacy.

So i don't text back, but I call her and we speak for about 6 minutes about random shit and then I tell her I have to go cuz I'm having lunch with someone - this is true

So i'll call her tomorrow and flirt some more and tell her I'm confirming for Wednesday. How do I flirt in a way where I dont come off pervy, but get her prepared that I'm going to be making a move on her?

Concern: She cannot come to my place. I'm in a relationship and she lives with a roommate and just moved in with her a few weeks ago. I'm concerned that if she has me over, she may be thinking that she'll seem like a slut to her roomie. Not sure what to do here, but i'll do my best to address her objections and get her to invite me over. I may even use the coupon But I need help thinking through this of how I get her to invite me over without me seeming desperate!

About her: she's probably like 27, but she's fine! Brunette, 5'5 beautiful bod, probably a 7.
About me: I'm 30, but still have a full head of hair and I got carded at a bar the other day! Ha!

I give you this information because I feel like you all think like me. More info provides more analysis which in turn generates better advice.

Thanks in advance guys!

 

[trashKENNUT]

Re: FR Date Night

Tyme2k is right. You are old fashioned. but then it's ten years already. Anyway meet her when her roommate is not around. it will be easier for her then.

Zac

 

[Vash]

Re: FR Date Night

Damn, reading back my comment, I sound like a complete douche. Sorry:

If she can't come to your place and vice versa, is there some other place you can stay, like a hotel nearby or something?

 

[Tyme2k]

Re: FR Date Night

Going to break down some things for you here. I didn't read the notes from your history until after I made my post. It's pretty clear in your most recent update that you lack some fundamentals.

Me: "Hey I was busy this weekend. When may I see you again?"

First part kind of OK, second part VERY BAD. Never ask and leave it up to her. To me this isn't congruent to the leader frame you set from previous interactions. Better way "Hey I was busy this weekend. Let's meet soon, what's your schedule like this week?"

Her: I'm in another town (3 hours away)
Me: Pick you in 10 minutes?
Her: LOL
(Some other random texts

I like your response since it's clearly joking and shows you aren't taking it too seriously. It opens her up for dialogue which means she's investing. You should remember that less investment on your part is good, but not so little she auto rejects.

Me: You're pretty! Stop being frustrated and smile.

I would refrain from this type of compliment until you have slept with her. The second part could have been perfect "Stop being frustrated and smile."

Her: I analyze everything and take failure in stride.
(few minutes later)
Her: "I'm kinda intense" "LOL"

She realized what she said was weird. You didn't respond right away which was great so she thought about it and justified it by saying she's intense. What you did next was PERFECT, ignore and redirect to moving things forward!

I wouldn't flirt unnaturally with her, anything you do in the phone call should flow as you normally would. Try not to give her investment over the phone she should know that she can only get it from you if she is in your presence.

She cannot come to my place. I'm in a relationship

This happened to me before. It's actually how I found this site and learned that game exists. Man am I grateful, this shit changed my life. That said I was unsuccessful. The girl was literally begging to come back to my place, we had sex when I was 17 so that wasn't an issue, but I hadn't seen her in 10 years so it was pretty much new. I couldn't bring her home nor could I go to her place cause of roommates. I found this site trying to find a way to communicate to her I was finishing a relationship and that's why..

Anyway, that night was my only chance with this girl. I needed to come up with something and failed. I think going back I would have led on that she could come to my place indirectly and meet her somewhere then explain the situation. Then I would try to fuck her in my car or at a park. I have read some amazing FR/LR from pros on sex locations. They will fuck in alley's, cars, ice rooms, bathrooms, where ever get creative. I personally have pulled to a parking garage and of course a car.

All that said why not spring for a hotel room? A natural friend of mine has pulled this off on a few occasions. In my opinion I would do this naturally just go to a hotel and get the room, or call it in on the way. This should be after you've got her buying temperature spiked and you are pretty sure she will follow your lead. Call in the room go grab the key and take her to the room. I know if there was a girl I really liked I'd drop the $50 - $100 to secure a sexual relationship.

The gist of what I'm saying here is remain cool, don't over invest, don't give her any control, and lead your ass off. Get to that closing location and close out.

 

[trashKENNUT]

Re: FR Date Night

I have read some amazing FR/LR from pros on sex locations. They will fuck in alley's, cars, ice rooms, bathrooms, where ever get creative.

Time for something fun. Anyway, JUSt examples here, from other PUAs in one of their articles and books.

Aaron Sleazy - Bathrooms
Vin Dicarlo - Van
Gambler - Hotel

i'm sure there's a lot of places. When there's a will, there's a way. lolx!

Zac

 

[myshkinrush]

Re: FR Date Night

Zac and Tyme2K - Great points - will do as you suggested.

Vash - Don't sweat it! you were trying to help!

How the hell do I not be old fashioned?!

 

[myshkinrush]

Re: FR Date Night - Update

OK. So this is how I setup the second date:

Tuesday morning, I sent girl text saying:
(10AM)
Me: Wow, been a crazy day! What's your schedule look like today?
Her: So busy..i have to run to all these sites, appointments end at 530PMish
(I don't respond)
Her: Then I'm heading to the mall on the way home to kill some time
Me: which mall?
Her: on the way to home..
Me: <name of mall>
Her: Yeah that one.

(1PM)
Me: I have a dinner appointment in the evening at 7, but I want to see you. Meet for coffee at 530? Cool?
(no response for 20 minutes)
Her: I cant. I'm so busy, i haven't spent time with this client and it's going to be open-ended so not sure when it'll end.
(I dont respond to this and 20 minutes later)

Her: Plus I'm running around all day and am in my scrubs and I don't exactly look so presentable (she works in the medical industry)
(10 minutes later)
Me: I'll wear my pjs
Her: lol
(3PM)
Me: When will you end?
Her: Not sure yet, let's play it by ear.
Her: I'll text you when I'm done.
(I don't respond to this at all and I get ready to go start my Day 1 of the newbie assignment.)
(430PM)
Her: I finished early, I have a few minutes for coffee if you want to meet. But it has to be quick!
Me: Where are you?
Her: <gives me location>
Her: So yes, no, i need to know asap.
(I was driving, so couldn't respond, but I respond 10 minutes later)
Me: Yes, on a call give me 5, i'll call you.
Her: Where are we meeting?
(I don't respond)
(5PM)
Me: i'll pick you up in 5.
Her: OK..but it has to be quick, I have to be somewhere at 6
Her: I'm at this store running a quick errand (down the street from where I was)
Me: be there in 5

Alright, here's the deal. I have a customer dinner/meeting at 8PM that in way in hell I can cancel. So I have to end this by 730 and go, but I wanted to use this opportunity to warm her up to me and get sensual. I listed out a few goals in my mind of what I wanted to achieve:
1. Kiss her in the first 10 minutes! right, wrong - i just say to myself i need to get back in the game. The worst thing she can do is slap my face, throw water at me and storm out. But i drove, so she isn't going anywhere
2. Get very touchy/feely, hug her, kiss her. Make her very comfortable and relaxed
3. Make out in my car

I park my car in front of the store she's at, walk in and she notices me and gears herself for a hug. I hug, i run my hand over her lower back and pull her in.

We leave after she's done, back to my car as I have my hand on her back the whole time. We go to a Thai place and I order 2 Thai Iced Teas. We sit down, chat, I give her ass a hard time about how she's so "busy" and can't make time. She starts telling me something and talking..8 minutes left, still talking 6 minutes left, I honestly have no clue what she's saying..but I just try to be smooth the whole time smiling softly and letting her do most of the talking. She's curious about my day and I keep it short and she complains about how she spent so much time talking about her day and how she only gets "30 seconds". I ask if she really wants details..and she says yes, I give her more, but keep it short and turn it back on her. 5 minutes left.

As she's talking, I quickly reach in, grab her chin, pull her face gently forward and BAM! Kiss! and immediately after that, I continue talking about the same subject and she's just frozen! She can't believe that I kissed her and says.."OMG you surprised me with that", but continue the conversation as though nothing happened but say..i couldn't resist. But flow with the conversation and then a minute later..BAM! Kiss. and she kisses back but I'm catching her off guard and im laying gentle quick kisses and didn't really give her much time to kiss back. So then I went into push/pull mode and did this for about 10 minutes. She complains about how she had to be somewhere at 6 and at this point realizes she's not going anywhere! She says she's not hungry, but now gets hungry!

We order some food, I start playing footsie and tell her to stop seducing me with her legs..I wrap my legs around hers and turn her to face me, she's sitting perpendicular to me. Stupid place didn't have any booths, but whatever. I turn her towards me and grab her hand. She's totally perturbed by me and is so nervous! I ask her to relax and kiss me, but she says "No!" but I can see her smilingI say, c'mon, just one and she says.."then you're going to want more". I say, "No i promise, just one....every minute". Here's the thing, I just can't get her to relax a little, she was totally tense!

Look, I remember when I was dating (10 years ago), girls would just jump all over me when I kissed like that! I'm deep diving here, it's possible I may have become less attractive (I'm 30)?

She's holding herself back and throws out the following complains throughout the evening:
"I have boundaries ( she draws an imaginary box around herself) - my response: I don't see a boundary or box that you just drew..
- "You can't just do that" - my response: why not?
- "You just don't kiss someone that many times, we only had 1 date and you're already kissing me" - But i wanted to kiss you
- "I knew I shouldn't be dating Sales guys" - "well would you rather want someone that doesn't go after what they want?"
-"Do you ever take No for an answer" - not really
- "Has anyone ever said "no" to you?!" - yes, but not for long
- "God at least a few more dates before we kiss"

I grab her hand and hold it on my lap with her hand on my palm and play with her fingers gently massaging and I can tell she's getting a little comfortable (just a tad), but she keeps pulling her hand away.

I feel like I was having to respond to a lot of her objections - which I wasn't happy with it and was internally frustrated.

So I stop, and ask her, "do you really want me to keep my hands off you!?" She thinks..and goes back to one of the above complaints.

After we finish, the server asks about dessert, I ask for the menu options and we both decided against it. She then says, "I'm really in the mood for frozen yogurt". So I tease her "I thought you had to go" she replies, "Oh shut up" - by the way she knows I have a meeting and is reminding me that I have to go to, and I tell her that I'll be fine. We barely touch the food and I tell her she's taking it to go and get it wrapped up for her.

We leave, I have my hands all over her back and hips as we leave and as I open the door, I kiss her again! No kiss back.

On the way there, I kiss her again as I'm driving to the frozen yogurt place and I joke about how she's totally closer to me now in the passenger seat. And she says.."well at least your hands are on the wheel". I say.."Kiss me" and she says.."No!" one of those girly "No!'s" She says.."oh my god, at this rate, you're going to want to come over" I look at her and say.."I didn't say that you did". She says.."I know...but geez, there's no stopping you - oh my god". Her famous complaints to me: "Do you ever take No for an answer?" "Do you ever get turned down?"

We get to the frozen yogurt place, she asks for sample cups, she wants to try the different flavors and as she hands me the sample cup, but I don't take it and tell her to feed me! She says.."NO!" I say.."my hands are in my pockets and I don't want to take them out, "so feed me". So she smiles and does. She's having a hard time pushing one of the yogurt handles down and asks me to help and I say..."first a kiss" and she resists, and says.."Fine on the cheek" and kisses my cheek.

I tell her we're going to get yogurt and go to a park and sit in the car and enjoy. She says.."oh my god, you're going to take me to some discrete place" But I gather that she's not completely against it. We find a close by park, I park my car, play some music and start with the push/pull. I just wasn't comfortable with the seating because every time I would go in for a kiss, she would move back! I didn't have the right leverage to give a manhandle kiss and didn't get a chance. But we chat and I ask her about her ex-husband and why she didn't like him and she explains that she doesn't even know why she married him, she wasn't attracted to him, but it happened and it was stupid. I move away from this topic and ask her "what kind of man interests you?" She starts to talk..and quickly catches herself and says: "NO! I'm not going to tell you, because it's only going to embolden you" and complains about how her ex was so boring! She also shares that her ex cheated on her, but I think to myself that they never clicked to begin with so, I didn't even think it mattered. I made a joke about it being an "arranged marriage".

She's still really tense and I can't even do the push/pull thing. It's about 745 ( have customer dinner/meeting and needed to be there at 8). So, by this point, I barely got in 10 kisses with her kissing me back like 3 or 4 times max the entire evening AND I have to take a crazy terrible piss from hell, so I'm definitely in a rush to get out of there. I'm sighing loudly at times because I have to take a piss but don't tell her that and she thinks i'm frustrated with her. I tell her no, it's not that, I'm just really sore from the gym. I notice after I say that, her face changes..as though she could see me naked or something - i felt it was in a good way. Yet, she still refuses to kiss me/initiate back anything and I start to joke about how she's seducing me. (Internally, I was getting frustrated but also knew that if I wasn't busy, she was not in a rush to go home. She never asked me to take her back to her car)

I start driving back to her car and get her to kiss me as I'm driving but nothing. But she's still in a great mood and joyful, etc. After I park next to her, I try to get her to give me a goodbye kiss. "one for the road" and she says.."You've had so many kisses tonight, no way, I broke so many of my rules". She says..cmon give me a hug and I just stay put, resisting and telling her to "get out of my car" jokingly. She says.."c'mon give me a goodbye hug" So i get out, give her a hug, grope her, slide my hands around her back and just a little over her amazing tight ass! And she says.."See, all you guys are the same..take a little more and then you want more and more. I ignore continue to kiss her all over her face, neck, ears,..and she gives me a hug and gets in her car.

She's one of those "career minded' types and totally Type A and she reminds me about how I have a meeting for work and I can't be late which came off tome as this "motherly" bullshit. I give her one tight hug and take off.

There's a nearby starbucks, I drive over, park my car, leave it on and as I'm running inside to unleash my piss from hell, I notice her noticing me running inside and then she parks next to my car and I'm thinking like what the fuck is she up to. I run in, take a piss and come back out and go directly to the driver side of her car and ask her what she's doing. She pulls her window down and says.."come here" I stupidly think she's going to show me something, but she grabs my face and head and starts kissing me and is giving me tongue - legit! I'm totally surprised at this point, because she didn't kiss me like that all night. It was quick, maybe max 8 seconds, not more. and she kisses me twice both times, tongue.

I'm definitely bewildered at this point. She's definitely got some game or some major insecurities and is conservative, i don't fucking know...It took me about 2 hours to just get some tongue!? I may be 30, but I look young - I got carded the other day at a bar!

This morning, I send her a text saying she left leftovers in my car and she replies with a pouty smiley face:
her: "I am not coming to get it"
(2 hours later)
Me: Howdy! Well..if you change your mind...its in the garbage can somewhere in < city name>
Her: Gross.
Me: Yesterday everning wasn't...very delicious (she thinks I meant spending time with her was not delicious - some text miscomunication)
Her: I am glad spending time harassing me isn't "delicious"
Her: It's more "stressful"
Me: I was talking about the frozen yogurt! Gee..do you ever stop seducing?
Her: "I'm peeved at you" attaches an image of the word "Incorrigible" meaning = Not able to be corrected, improved, or reformed.
(hour later)
Me: We'll have to sit down and talk about that..you can tell me how you're feeling
Her: "<sad smiley> Your something".
(few hours later, I notice I'm missing my shades and seriously need to find them - fucking expensive)
Me: Hey I can't find my shades
Me: Was I wearing them after we left the thai place
Her: I dont remember (I notice that her texts to me now are much shorter, and she's ending most of them with a period - not sure if she was doing that before)
(few hours later)
Me: did you steal them?!
Me: I don't know about you...
Me: Missy
(Have not heard back from her and I have not sent her any further texts.)

So guys, I'm a little confused (definitely not attached or gaga over this girl). I definitely think as Tyme2K pointed out, she sees me as relationship material, and that just ain't happening. I've been in a 10 year relationship which hasn't officially ended nor have serious conversations about it being over have occurred; I'm pretty much cheating at this point. I don't see myself getting into another relationship. Frankly speaking, I don't see myself being monogamous - just not in my blood stream. Plus, I have a lot of catching up to do ;-).

Questions:
- Why would she invite me to her car and kiss me like that? Tongue at that?
- Why was she so tense the whole time, couldn't get her to relax at all. I'm suspecting that as cute as she is, she hasn't been with many men and definitely not as direct as I was.
- Was she caught off-guard so much so that I as I started kissing her, her system was blatantly shocked?
- By the way, when we were in the restaurant, her feet were crossed the whole time! Not once opening them. Why do they do that? I think i definitely made her wet as she was sweating a little and her face turned red each time I kissed her.
- Is this just one of those really conservative girls?

Please help out brothers! Don't be shy, give me everything you got aside from just the questions I'm asking you, I don't think I've left many details out. I may have come off a little needy wanting her to kiss me (vs just me kissing her - i was looking for some physical initiation from her), but definitely not desperate! At one point she said to me.."you know you cant have everything you want all the time" and I replied.."I can try" with a very stoic face. And she just kinda was taken aback by my answer and didn't say shit!

And lastly, as far as my goals, I think I accomplished most of what I wanted to do: become comfortable in my skin, get back in the game, kiss in the first 10 minutes, no severe make-out, but she gave me tongue on her own cognizance - I mean it was over, but she pulled up next to me.

I have self respect, but no pride when it comes to making myself better at something - so please provide your awesome feedback! As always, thank you in advance for your time!

-Mysh!

 

[myshkinrush]

Re: FR Date Night

4 hours later:
She just sent me a text: "Good! You shouldn't be knowing so much about me just yet!"

 

[trashKENNUT]

Re: FR Date Night - Update

Too much kiss i would assume, and not building sexual tension. I have this assumption you are too friendly. This must be a problem. Reciprocate with her logically is another thing.

Gosh, you could have seal this, but nevermind.

Zac

 

[myshkinrush]

Re: FR Date Night

Thanks for taking the time to respond to this Zac. Should I ask her for another coffee date? and If so, how should I do it and what should be strategy?

 

[Tyme2k]

Re: FR Date Night

A few things for the future that you must avoid:

Don't make a 2nd date with a time constraint. She would have fucked you if you had the time. First date is OK as an informative date, but second you need to be able to fuck her.

DON'T kiss her, there is a magical thing called sexual tension. You build this up and up and up then BAM! So what you want to do is physically escalate touch but DON'T linger. Holding her hand doing things for too long is what bf/gf's do not what you do when seducing. Think of push pull as literal, you take her hand touch it then almost toss it away. All she can think is that touch was nice I want more, let that build then give her a little more. After doing touches like this she will start to have uncontrollable urges to get closer to you.

Don't ask for ANYTHING. Don't talk about what you want, go for it then back off.

While she's shit testing you stay calm and cool

She's holding herself back and throws out the following complains throughout the evening:
"I have boundaries ( she draws an imaginary box around herself) - my response: I don't see a boundary or box that you just drew..
- "You can't just do that" - my response: why not?
- "You just don't kiss someone that many times, we only had 1 date and you're already kissing me" - But i wanted to kiss you
- "I knew I shouldn't be dating Sales guys" - "well would you rather want someone that doesn't go after what they want?"
-"Do you ever take No for an answer" - not really
- "Has anyone ever said "no" to you?!" - yes, but not for long
- "God at least a few more dates before we kiss"

These are shit tests, but you are going for seduction not marriage. If you would have refrained from kissing her until you were in a seduction location this would be your LMR(last minute resistance) instead. Then all you have to do is relax, agree and escalate. Before you know it she would crave your dick. I will give you examples how I would have answered these objections:

- "I have boundaries ( she draws an imaginary box around herself) - my response: Me too..
- "You can't just do that" - my response: Do what?
- "You just don't kiss someone that many times, we only had 1 date and you're already kissing me" - Yeah stop making me do this
- "I knew I shouldn't be dating Sales guys" - "I knew I shouldn't talk to (whatever she does) girls, this could never work"
-"Do you ever take No for an answer" - *pause, sexy eye contact, continue*
- "Has anyone ever said "no" to you?!" - look what you're doing to me *put her hand on cock*
- "God at least a few more dates before we kiss" - You're right we should wait til we're married

I think you get the gist, keep her logical mind occupied, but continue what you want to be doing. Blame her whenever you get the chance and tell her SHE'S the instigator/chaser. "Stop giving me that look, You're not getting in my pants" "I'm on my period, so you're not taking me home"

Looks are not important, your LOOK is, but not your actual looks.

So I stop, and ask her, "do you really want me to keep my hands off you!?" this is asking her logical mind about emotions. NOT GOOD. She doesn't "know" what she wants, she only feels it. When her brain is asked what it feels it uses a rationalization to deny the feelings. Chase has an article

I'll pick this up soon

 

[Tyme2k]

Re: FR Date Night

This is the article I mentioned about distracting logical mind while escalating https://www.girlschase.com/content/take- ... escalation

let's address the questions if I have time

Questions:
- Why would she invite me to her car and kiss me like that? Tongue at that?

Maybe feeling a little remorseful and she might lose you if she didn't, or maybe she wanted to hook you so you don't run off. If it were me I'd take it from her, don't give her any physical intimacy until she deserves it or works for it.

- Why was she so tense the whole time, couldn't get her to relax at all. I'm suspecting that as cute as she is, she hasn't been with many men and definitely not as direct as I was.

She wouldn't relax because you put a lot of pressure on her by escalating without ability of closing in a seduction location. It broke all intrigue and she "knew" what you wanted. You want a girl wondering does he like me does he want me, what can I do to make him want me more, now she's chasing you. Don't kid yourself about her not being with direct guys, if she is hot as you say, this is most likely the ONLY type of guy she gets with. All the other weaklings cant break her LMR.

- Was she caught off-guard so much so that I as I started kissing her, her system was blatantly shocked?

Pretty much, this is OK when you can lead them to sex, but in this situation you couldn't she knew and you knew. Then she left you wanting more and you left her knowing what's going to happen next.

- By the way, when we were in the restaurant, her feet were crossed the whole time! Not once opening them. Why do they do that? I think i definitely made her wet as she was sweating a little and her face turned red each time I kissed her.

You have to get her to relax first, she should be comfortable with you like her best friend.

- Is this just one of those really conservative girls?

A constant reminder I have got while learning game is there is no such thing as "conservative." That word is created by society to help girls avoid being slutty. Some of the most conservative girls I know still have had one night stands. They all like to get fucked it's just a matter of you putting it all together right and hitting the right buttons not missing escalation windows. You'll know once you've done it and what makes it more awesome now is you can explain the steps you took after. I love talking to my girl about the night I picked her up, I can explain it on another level to her.

I say you try to get her in a closing location and push, probably you will get TONS of LMR cause she knows what will happen now. I've been here MANY times.

I'd say right now the best thing for you is to go out and start cold approaching. Get good at this cause this is where you shine later, that and LMR busting abilities.

 

[myshkinrush]

Re: FR Date Night

Tyler,
As always good stuff and good advice. Looking back at this experience, I failed to build enough sexual tension leading to her nervousness. She initiated the last kiss probably for the reasons you mentioned and she definitely may have been emotionally aroused. I sent her a flirty text yesterday, no response yet. This tells me that rationalization has kicked in and she may think I came on way too strong and is probably turned off.

Any chance this is salvageable at this point? Considering there isn't much intrigue left for her as to what I want?

You're right, I need to do the 10 day assignment and do a lot of approaches. At least 10 opens a day.

Here's a question: I don't visit clubs any more, never have really. So if/when I do want to open, most women would be at places where they may not be expecting to get hit on.

What do you think about this? By the way I've starts reading your diary - cool stuff man!

Thanks!