Below is the story, I put it here because I think it's both common teetering between customer and partner with these kind of girls and you can learn something and because I'm not 100% sure of what was happening here myslef and would love to hear your opinion.
Also I wasn't sure if this was material for “field reports”, yet having developed over several days, being the topic quite advanced, and being also quite general -dating a sex worker between a customer and a partner is a generalizable thing- I post it here.
SHE
She’s… Some sort of a go go girl / hooker.
Not sure how often she actually get paid for sex, from what I could see it seems like she makes an income by taking out for night parties rich tourists and well to do business retreat people.
She’s hot of course, extremely opinionated, extremely stubborn, rejects virtually any compliance request just for the sake of going against what's been asked her to do (sometimes you'll meet girls like this)… And the toughest woman in terms of leadership I’ve ever seen.
I lost the majority of “frame battles” with her, many times over the smallest things like where to sit, and that's one of the things that makes the dynamics of this story difficult to understand.
It’s all the more fun and impressive considering she’s very small.
We’ll call her “Little Neighbour” since…
FIRST DAY - ME AS THE ROMANCER
… We lived close by, and we met on the street, around 5pm maybe.
We walked a bit and went to lunch together.
She brought me to some local place I would have never been to without her, which was cool, and so it felt like a value exchange when I paid for both –though you could see from the beginning how accustomed she was at being paid for-.
I tried to move to hotel straight after lunch but didn’t work.
We went for a long sightseeing walk instead which turned out strikingly romantic actually.
We were holding hands and touching each other often on the way.
She noticed people were looking at us, I said it was because I was handsome and they were jealous of her. She loved it and got even closer to me after that.
Once we reached the river and were leaning against the rail, I went to kiss her.
First time she moved her head away, then she just repositioned her face towards me again, a sign to me she regretted deflecting and now wanted to be kissed.
I pondered for a second if I should do it now and not instead “punish her”, but the atmosphere was just too good, so I gave her a pecker.
We then got a beer on a bridge, which I paid for again, and the gay waitress said I was handsome.
She laughed hysterically and pretended she wanted to jump off the bridge and seemed to get a kick out of the fact this guy liked me.
FIRST NIGHT – FIRST PUZZLE
We went back to the hotel, laid on the bed to watch TV and kissed and hugged but she wasn't down for sex and was stern in not removing her pants.
Very stern
.
She snuggled on me but I didn’t wanna be too romantic if we were not doing it so didn’t reciprocate much and actually later got up.
Possibly this was a mistake, I should have tried the romantic thing for a few minutes, kissed and caressed more and more sensually and then started again.
She had to leave soon though to go to the club with her “friends” –I will later get to know she really got there much later because she had spent too much time with me-.
She really wanted me to go out with her, and this is the first thing I really don’t understand.
Why did she want me to go?
I wasn’t gonna pay for her, she had the other guy do that.
And how come she didn’t mind letting me see her actual job while at the beginning she said she was selling clothes?
I went anyway thinking I'd just get a beer and leave.
As we walked in a bouncer patted me on the back as if I was an habitue.
She was greeted by her friend and a big Russian Man secretively put a bunch of money on her hand.
And of course kept on throwing money around the club –for me included, drinking and eating fruit platters on his largess just for being friend of Little Neigbour-.
The Russian Man also had a blonde Russian prostitute with him and 3 other people who seemed just friends of him.
Somehow it seemed like he wasn’t sleeping with Little Neighbour, or at least not constantly, but mostly used her as a hot chaperone around the city.
Indeed it was unbelievable, this big Russian man would give this little girl the money and let her handle everything.
We later went to a restaurant, everyone following Little Neighbour whom organizes everything and moves everyone.
Rich Russian of course paid for everyone and, again, gave the money to Little Neighbour to settle everything.
Then Rich Russian left with the Russian hooker and all the rest went out own ways.
I went with Little Neighbour.
When we went back she said she wouldn’t sleep with me if we went to my hotel and that she really meant it.
As I knew already how stubborn she was and as I cherish sleeping on my own, I told her better we go our own way.
In hindsight, if fucking her was the final goal, this might have been another mistake: since we were still riding high on the good day together I should have probably told her to come anyway, make her horny, try again, and if not try again in the morning.
At this point, I hadn’t realized what a bad character she was though and couldn’t know it was going to quickly go downhill.
SECOND DAY
She wrote me the day after to meet.
We did meet around 7pm: she wanted to go somewhere, I wanted to go somewhere else and this time I wasn’t gonna follow her.
She's the kind of girl who'd rather feel bad than "lose" and follow someone, so she doesn't follow me either and I bid her farewell.
Well, she started chasing hard here and trying to get a raise out of me.
While I do think she liked me at this point, I’m still not sure how much and in which category she’d slot me: customer? Customer she liked?
And so bitter we weren't together: was it because she wasn’t used to guys not following her?
Anyway, I probably answered too often here to her silly messages of us not being friends anymore and me being selfish.
The last message was hers though and I thought that was probably the end between us as I wouldn't contact her and she'd be too proud to do it.
THIRD DAY
But the day after she sees me walking in the afternoon and calls me.
We sit officially “to talk”, but it’s mostly her complaining and berating me.
Outside of the romantic bubble from yesterday now it’s obvious she has a terrible terrible character: selfish, focused on the negatives of lives, blaming others for her feelings etc. etc.
I go to touch her, hold hands and invite her to the hotel but she’s too angry, doesn’t work at all.
She says we can go later for a drink, I say “maybe” and we part ways.
I go again for holding hands as we walk side by side: she resists a bit, then takes it and smiles, she really seems happy about getting some physical touch now and to get some reconciliation.
Then I push it more telling her to “give me a kiss” –was working well the first day-, it was a mistake here though as this kind of girl hates being told what to do: she gets moody again and accelerates towards her location.
Maybe she expected I'd follow her silly antics but I just go my marry way.
She writes me later to go for a drink, but I decline saying if she’s annoyed with my touch, it makes no sense.
Another 3 messages in a row from her, the first saying "the first day was ok, but today she was angry at me", a bit of an excuse for her behaviour, good, and the last one saying I’m just there for sex, probably trying to get me to say it’s not true and I like her beyond sex or something stupid like that.
I just reply to that last one saying we’re cool together.
FOURTH DAY
I go out with a friend, I have no other meet ups planned after so I text her first this time.
Language barriers bring a misunderstanding and another quarrel.
My last message is that she should apologize for her behavior.
She later writes me again around 3am if I want to meet. I say I’m at the hotel, she can come there.
She says “if you want to meet, you come here”. I don’t reply and little later she chases a bit more with a better tone “if you want to meet, can you come here?”.
The whole relationship has been going down the hill from the great start.
Too much arguing over texts and not as good vibes when in person.
Maybe I could have called it quits here, but didn’t.
I wanted to see where it was going and after all, she was still local with lots of knowledge of places, she was still hot and I still believed I could fuck her.
LAST DAY – ME AS THE CUSTOMER
She writes again first in the afternoon, I say I’m at the hotel and she can come there. She says to first meet her out, then we can go to the hotel.
But I don’t, I’m meeting another girl first early in the evening –and will bed her-, and only after meet Little Neighbour around 10pm.
Now the music changed though, she says she’d like to go to the hotel with me, BUT… She wants a gift.
I wonder what changed so much now: I believe that while she still thinks I’m somewhat attractive, I lost lover points, romancer points and, to top it all, she still has negative feelings towards me for making her feel bad on several occasions.
She has to meet a friend now and I go to prepare the luggage, but we agree to meet again around 12.
We meet and she tells me to go to some place she knows.
In hindsight this time letting her decide the plan might have been the biggest mistake of all: while following her at the beginning yielded positive results because we were on better terms –new cheap local restaurant, romantic walk, rich Russian paying for my partying-, this time the she brings me to the same club where we were with the Russian, except this time the Russian is not there.
It’s probably a place where she get a cut on the drinks?
My plan was simple: have a last shot at having a good time together, restore positive vibes and then go for it again.
It worked in the past, and I also remembered of a cool friend of mine telling me of a time he fucked a hooker after they just spent some time together, he paid her a drink and at the end of the night she went with him for free because “he had been nice to her” (of course he was also sexy, and I suppose some hookers might be tired of guys treating them like dirt).
At the club we get two drinks each and she also orders some snacks without asking me anything.
I was falling pray of typical hooker behavior and drew the line at “two drinks max, then pull her or go back by yourself”.
This was also the first time I felt a strong dislike to what seemed a paymaster/hooker dynamic (to be fair, all drinks among the cheapest, 23 EUR total which isn’t much not even here, but the dynamics was that).
Anyway, I had still in mind to give it my best shot, and helped by the “stop loss” I had in mind -2 drinks and that’s it- I actually manage pretty well to hide/change my discontent and, indeed, the evening wasn’t actually that bad.
Although not as good as the first day, her mood did significantly improve from the previous times we met.
So we go back and I pull some sexual innuendo with touching and talking about my big penis –it’s not big, but she had started saying that so I go along-.
But once off the cab… It’s again the same story: she “wants” to come… but with a gift. And what a stereotype, the gift would be a fucking a make up lol.
By now she even knows I don’t throw money around and she even acknowledges so and say she wouldn’t expect any big gift anyway, she even say she can “help” pay…. But she just wants something :S.
She says “it’s easy, just a small thing, then we can enjoy, and she can even come to the airport with me if I want” (I was flying the day after).
But I stay my opinion and she, of course, kept hers.
She complains it’s getting late and we’re wasting time talking about this stuff.
And she’s right.
Yes, she doesn’t move and keeps staying at the bench.
So I bid her farewell first and left.
And this is another part I don’t understand.
It was my last night, it should have been pretty clear I wasn’t making any gift and I wasn’t going back on my mind… Yet after I walk she sends another 3 messages and calls me twice.
To meet, talk or something stupid like that.
Of course I repeat to come over, without a gift, and she just rambles on and say it's only small, and complains, and we can go to eat and generally brings a bad mood.
Why.
Why the hell for, I wonder?
Why chasing me again on the last night?
Is it because she really wanted the gift? She really needed the gift, financially and materially? I don’t think it would make any major material difference in her life.
Or maybe it did?
Or was it pain for being turned down on the sex plus gift thing?
A mix of all of the above?
Or because she actually still liked me a bit?
YOUR OPINION
This was long, sorry, but I wanted to put all the major stuff.
I’d love to hear your opinion.
Also I wasn't sure if this was material for “field reports”, yet having developed over several days, being the topic quite advanced, and being also quite general -dating a sex worker between a customer and a partner is a generalizable thing- I post it here.
SHE
She’s… Some sort of a go go girl / hooker.
Not sure how often she actually get paid for sex, from what I could see it seems like she makes an income by taking out for night parties rich tourists and well to do business retreat people.
She’s hot of course, extremely opinionated, extremely stubborn, rejects virtually any compliance request just for the sake of going against what's been asked her to do (sometimes you'll meet girls like this)… And the toughest woman in terms of leadership I’ve ever seen.
I lost the majority of “frame battles” with her, many times over the smallest things like where to sit, and that's one of the things that makes the dynamics of this story difficult to understand.
It’s all the more fun and impressive considering she’s very small.
We’ll call her “Little Neighbour” since…
FIRST DAY - ME AS THE ROMANCER
… We lived close by, and we met on the street, around 5pm maybe.
We walked a bit and went to lunch together.
She brought me to some local place I would have never been to without her, which was cool, and so it felt like a value exchange when I paid for both –though you could see from the beginning how accustomed she was at being paid for-.
I tried to move to hotel straight after lunch but didn’t work.
We went for a long sightseeing walk instead which turned out strikingly romantic actually.
We were holding hands and touching each other often on the way.
She noticed people were looking at us, I said it was because I was handsome and they were jealous of her. She loved it and got even closer to me after that.
Once we reached the river and were leaning against the rail, I went to kiss her.
First time she moved her head away, then she just repositioned her face towards me again, a sign to me she regretted deflecting and now wanted to be kissed.
I pondered for a second if I should do it now and not instead “punish her”, but the atmosphere was just too good, so I gave her a pecker.
We then got a beer on a bridge, which I paid for again, and the gay waitress said I was handsome.
She laughed hysterically and pretended she wanted to jump off the bridge and seemed to get a kick out of the fact this guy liked me.
FIRST NIGHT – FIRST PUZZLE
We went back to the hotel, laid on the bed to watch TV and kissed and hugged but she wasn't down for sex and was stern in not removing her pants.
Very stern
.She snuggled on me but I didn’t wanna be too romantic if we were not doing it so didn’t reciprocate much and actually later got up.
Possibly this was a mistake, I should have tried the romantic thing for a few minutes, kissed and caressed more and more sensually and then started again.
She had to leave soon though to go to the club with her “friends” –I will later get to know she really got there much later because she had spent too much time with me-.
She really wanted me to go out with her, and this is the first thing I really don’t understand.
Why did she want me to go?
I wasn’t gonna pay for her, she had the other guy do that.
And how come she didn’t mind letting me see her actual job while at the beginning she said she was selling clothes?
I went anyway thinking I'd just get a beer and leave.
As we walked in a bouncer patted me on the back as if I was an habitue.
She was greeted by her friend and a big Russian Man secretively put a bunch of money on her hand.
And of course kept on throwing money around the club –for me included, drinking and eating fruit platters on his largess just for being friend of Little Neigbour-.
The Russian Man also had a blonde Russian prostitute with him and 3 other people who seemed just friends of him.
Somehow it seemed like he wasn’t sleeping with Little Neighbour, or at least not constantly, but mostly used her as a hot chaperone around the city.
Indeed it was unbelievable, this big Russian man would give this little girl the money and let her handle everything.
We later went to a restaurant, everyone following Little Neighbour whom organizes everything and moves everyone.
Rich Russian of course paid for everyone and, again, gave the money to Little Neighbour to settle everything.
Then Rich Russian left with the Russian hooker and all the rest went out own ways.
I went with Little Neighbour.
When we went back she said she wouldn’t sleep with me if we went to my hotel and that she really meant it.
As I knew already how stubborn she was and as I cherish sleeping on my own, I told her better we go our own way.
In hindsight, if fucking her was the final goal, this might have been another mistake: since we were still riding high on the good day together I should have probably told her to come anyway, make her horny, try again, and if not try again in the morning.
At this point, I hadn’t realized what a bad character she was though and couldn’t know it was going to quickly go downhill.
SECOND DAY
She wrote me the day after to meet.
We did meet around 7pm: she wanted to go somewhere, I wanted to go somewhere else and this time I wasn’t gonna follow her.
She's the kind of girl who'd rather feel bad than "lose" and follow someone, so she doesn't follow me either and I bid her farewell.
Well, she started chasing hard here and trying to get a raise out of me.
While I do think she liked me at this point, I’m still not sure how much and in which category she’d slot me: customer? Customer she liked?
And so bitter we weren't together: was it because she wasn’t used to guys not following her?
Anyway, I probably answered too often here to her silly messages of us not being friends anymore and me being selfish.
The last message was hers though and I thought that was probably the end between us as I wouldn't contact her and she'd be too proud to do it.
THIRD DAY
But the day after she sees me walking in the afternoon and calls me.
We sit officially “to talk”, but it’s mostly her complaining and berating me.
Outside of the romantic bubble from yesterday now it’s obvious she has a terrible terrible character: selfish, focused on the negatives of lives, blaming others for her feelings etc. etc.
I go to touch her, hold hands and invite her to the hotel but she’s too angry, doesn’t work at all.
She says we can go later for a drink, I say “maybe” and we part ways.
I go again for holding hands as we walk side by side: she resists a bit, then takes it and smiles, she really seems happy about getting some physical touch now and to get some reconciliation.
Then I push it more telling her to “give me a kiss” –was working well the first day-, it was a mistake here though as this kind of girl hates being told what to do: she gets moody again and accelerates towards her location.
Maybe she expected I'd follow her silly antics but I just go my marry way.
She writes me later to go for a drink, but I decline saying if she’s annoyed with my touch, it makes no sense.
Another 3 messages in a row from her, the first saying "the first day was ok, but today she was angry at me", a bit of an excuse for her behaviour, good, and the last one saying I’m just there for sex, probably trying to get me to say it’s not true and I like her beyond sex or something stupid like that.
I just reply to that last one saying we’re cool together.
FOURTH DAY
I go out with a friend, I have no other meet ups planned after so I text her first this time.
Language barriers bring a misunderstanding and another quarrel.
My last message is that she should apologize for her behavior.
She later writes me again around 3am if I want to meet. I say I’m at the hotel, she can come there.
She says “if you want to meet, you come here”. I don’t reply and little later she chases a bit more with a better tone “if you want to meet, can you come here?”.
The whole relationship has been going down the hill from the great start.
Too much arguing over texts and not as good vibes when in person.
Maybe I could have called it quits here, but didn’t.
I wanted to see where it was going and after all, she was still local with lots of knowledge of places, she was still hot and I still believed I could fuck her.
LAST DAY – ME AS THE CUSTOMER
She writes again first in the afternoon, I say I’m at the hotel and she can come there. She says to first meet her out, then we can go to the hotel.
But I don’t, I’m meeting another girl first early in the evening –and will bed her-, and only after meet Little Neighbour around 10pm.
Now the music changed though, she says she’d like to go to the hotel with me, BUT… She wants a gift.
I wonder what changed so much now: I believe that while she still thinks I’m somewhat attractive, I lost lover points, romancer points and, to top it all, she still has negative feelings towards me for making her feel bad on several occasions.
She has to meet a friend now and I go to prepare the luggage, but we agree to meet again around 12.
We meet and she tells me to go to some place she knows.
In hindsight this time letting her decide the plan might have been the biggest mistake of all: while following her at the beginning yielded positive results because we were on better terms –new cheap local restaurant, romantic walk, rich Russian paying for my partying-, this time the she brings me to the same club where we were with the Russian, except this time the Russian is not there
. It’s probably a place where she get a cut on the drinks?
My plan was simple: have a last shot at having a good time together, restore positive vibes and then go for it again.
It worked in the past, and I also remembered of a cool friend of mine telling me of a time he fucked a hooker after they just spent some time together, he paid her a drink and at the end of the night she went with him for free because “he had been nice to her” (of course he was also sexy, and I suppose some hookers might be tired of guys treating them like dirt).
At the club we get two drinks each and she also orders some snacks without asking me anything.
I was falling pray of typical hooker behavior and drew the line at “two drinks max, then pull her or go back by yourself”.
This was also the first time I felt a strong dislike to what seemed a paymaster/hooker dynamic (to be fair, all drinks among the cheapest, 23 EUR total which isn’t much not even here, but the dynamics was that).
Anyway, I had still in mind to give it my best shot, and helped by the “stop loss” I had in mind -2 drinks and that’s it- I actually manage pretty well to hide/change my discontent and, indeed, the evening wasn’t actually that bad.
Although not as good as the first day, her mood did significantly improve from the previous times we met.
So we go back and I pull some sexual innuendo with touching and talking about my big penis –it’s not big, but she had started saying that so I go along-.
But once off the cab… It’s again the same story: she “wants” to come… but with a gift. And what a stereotype, the gift would be a fucking a make up lol.
By now she even knows I don’t throw money around and she even acknowledges so and say she wouldn’t expect any big gift anyway, she even say she can “help” pay…. But she just wants something :S.
She says “it’s easy, just a small thing, then we can enjoy, and she can even come to the airport with me if I want” (I was flying the day after).
But I stay my opinion and she, of course, kept hers.
She complains it’s getting late and we’re wasting time talking about this stuff.
And she’s right.
Yes, she doesn’t move and keeps staying at the bench.
So I bid her farewell first and left.
And this is another part I don’t understand.
It was my last night, it should have been pretty clear I wasn’t making any gift and I wasn’t going back on my mind… Yet after I walk she sends another 3 messages and calls me twice.
To meet, talk or something stupid like that.
Of course I repeat to come over, without a gift, and she just rambles on and say it's only small, and complains, and we can go to eat and generally brings a bad mood.
Why.
Why the hell for, I wonder?
Why chasing me again on the last night?
Is it because she really wanted the gift? She really needed the gift, financially and materially? I don’t think it would make any major material difference in her life.
Or maybe it did?
Or was it pain for being turned down on the sex plus gift thing?
A mix of all of the above?
Or because she actually still liked me a bit?
YOUR OPINION
This was long, sorry, but I wanted to put all the major stuff
.I’d love to hear your opinion.
