- Joined
- Jan 9, 2013
- Messages
- 39
So if you read Part 1, you will understand the background to this situation and more about this girl. If not here's the link:
viewtopic.php?f=5&t=1433
So I left off on March 3rd where DSL was definitely more receptive to my texts and was reinitiating invites, which was a big deal for her as I have never dealt with a girl who plays this hard to get. After this conversation though, I knew I be would be out of my hometown for a couple weeks as I go to school elsewhere. For this reason I didn't attempt to reschedule a meetup.
On March 29th I was back in town and thought I may as well try to make moves as it had been a couple weeks. Saw she was online on fbook (never had spoken to eachother on fbook till now) so I messaged her. We spoke very briefly when she said she was heading out for dinner, but I should text her. GAME ON!
Later that night
Me 10:13 p.m: How was the happymeal (joke...)
Her 9:43 am: Not too bad. How was your night
Me 12:55 p.m: Interesting. Guessing youre at an AA meeting tn? (Was making fun of her as I knew she had a rough night out drinking previously)
Her 1:46 p.m: Ya how'd you know. Wanna come with
Me: 3:07 p.m: Lucky for you, I'm in town and a great sponsor. What time?
Her 4:13 p.m: You can meet me there at 9
Me 5:05 p.m: Thinking we skip the meeting and see a movie instead
Her 5:55 p.m: That could work too
Me 6:51 p.m: Be ready for 9:15. I'll pick you up
Her 7:23 p.m: I won't be coming from home I have dinner before. So I can meet you there.
M 8:05 p.m: Sounds good. See you there.
A couple things to note. Right off the bat I was planning on using Chase's advice to ask her out pretty quickly. I found a smart way of finding out her schedule in a funny way and changed up the plans to see a movie. As you can see, I never asked to make plans or asked to pick her up, I firmly suggested. As well, I wanted to pick her up in my car, as I hoped I could persuade her after the movie to come back to my place. Obviously this didn't work as she said she was going to be out beforehand. As well, the movie only started at 10 p.m but I told her to meet for 9:15. This was because we had only met once before and I wanted some time to get to know her and get her comfortable with me, so she'd be willing to come to my place after.
Arrived 10 minutes after 9:15. Was completely planned, to build up intrigue. She was waiting for me inside and was looking very fine! Very attracted to well dressed women who know how to put themselves together. She definitely does! Right off the bat, I went in for a hug to set the tone physically. We got in line and begin conversation. I also decided I would take Chase's advice of not paying for her. Didn't want it to be awkward at the register when asked how are you paying, so when they called us up, I just put my hand on her back and motioned that she could go ahead. Worked flawlessly. Paid for our tickets and suggested we walk to a close bookstore, as we had time before the movie. She agreed, walked over and had pretty light hearted, fun banter. Definitely was getting flirty vibes at this point.
Walked back to the movie theatre and found seats. In the past I have wondered how to physically touch a girl in a movie you are interested in sexually, without portraying to much intimacy. I feel like holding hands is very intimate and something couples exclusively do. As well, Putting your arm around the girl can be very uncomfortable. I find the best way to physically touch a woman in a movie, is by placing your hand on her thigh. It can be highly sexual and definitely turn the girl on. Movie ended 12:20ish and I knew this would be the most crucial part of the night. We came in separate cars, but I suggested that she come over to hang out as it wasn't so late. She gave me some excuses about having to pick up her sister but I insisted she come for a bit. She said she would but would have to leave real shortly to get her sister.
I live with my parents when I'm in town from school, so I took her straight to the basement when we arrived at my place. Even as we're going down she's saying she has to leave in like 10 mins. There is a bedroom down there, but I took her to a couch in the main room instead. Could have been my first mistake, but I thought I could make the transition eventually. In the first 5 minutes I make my move and we start hooking up. She receives it well and is a great kisser! Hence the DSL! She keeps telling me though she has to go and I only have a few minutes to kiss her, to which I just say it's not that late and attempt to continue kissing. After a couple minutes I try to get her legs on the couch, where again she insists its time she goes. I just had enough and was like okay, go ahead. Looking back, I feel like I should have just continued escalation and ignored her or exaggerated how late it was, but we learn from our mistakes. As she gets up, she makes a comment about how she knows what kind of guy I am and thinks I got what I want from her. As she leaves my door, I pull her back for a hug and she goes for a kiss and I turn away jokingly but then kiss her. After the night I was upset with myself for a couple reasons. A) Did not withstand LMR and escalate 2) Should have never complied with her time limits- Should have been unaffected and shown I didn't care if she left. I feel like I came off as a bit too needy.
Next day: Sunday
Me 7:00 p.m: Nightmares from the movie last night?
Her 8:39 p.m: Are you kidding. I can take those guys
Me: Ha sure brown belt (she used to do karate). You were basically on top of me the entire movie.
Her:Are you complaining?
Me: Just as much as you were complaining when we hooked up (she wasn't...)
Her: Oh really? Because I remember you being pretty into it
Me: Well you weren't an aweful kisser...
Her: GLad you think so. You weren't terrible either
I never responded. Here's where I'd love some advice:
I knew I wouldn't be back in town for another month so I was confused if and when to message her next. I've read Franco's posts on not having check in texts and only texts to set up dates, cause you will come off as too available. After a week of not texting her I heard through my friend who introduced us (DSL PART 1), that he heard from DSL's good friend she was upset I hadn't been messaging her and that she was asking her friends for advice on me. I took this opportunity to message her and we spoke for a bit. My question is, do I continue to message her periodically till I'm back or do I cut communication till I can ask her to chill? I've waited for her to initiate since then, but she continues to play hard to get and has still yet to initiate. I definitely want to see her again and use her DSL for what they were made for!
Sorry for the BOOK. Probably should cut down on details, but you guys really got it all...
SLY
viewtopic.php?f=5&t=1433
So I left off on March 3rd where DSL was definitely more receptive to my texts and was reinitiating invites, which was a big deal for her as I have never dealt with a girl who plays this hard to get. After this conversation though, I knew I be would be out of my hometown for a couple weeks as I go to school elsewhere. For this reason I didn't attempt to reschedule a meetup.
On March 29th I was back in town and thought I may as well try to make moves as it had been a couple weeks. Saw she was online on fbook (never had spoken to eachother on fbook till now) so I messaged her. We spoke very briefly when she said she was heading out for dinner, but I should text her. GAME ON!
Later that night
Me 10:13 p.m: How was the happymeal (joke...)
Her 9:43 am: Not too bad. How was your night
Me 12:55 p.m: Interesting. Guessing youre at an AA meeting tn? (Was making fun of her as I knew she had a rough night out drinking previously)
Her 1:46 p.m: Ya how'd you know. Wanna come with
Me: 3:07 p.m: Lucky for you, I'm in town and a great sponsor. What time?
Her 4:13 p.m: You can meet me there at 9
Me 5:05 p.m: Thinking we skip the meeting and see a movie instead
Her 5:55 p.m: That could work too
Me 6:51 p.m: Be ready for 9:15. I'll pick you up
Her 7:23 p.m: I won't be coming from home I have dinner before. So I can meet you there.
M 8:05 p.m: Sounds good. See you there.
A couple things to note. Right off the bat I was planning on using Chase's advice to ask her out pretty quickly. I found a smart way of finding out her schedule in a funny way and changed up the plans to see a movie. As you can see, I never asked to make plans or asked to pick her up, I firmly suggested. As well, I wanted to pick her up in my car, as I hoped I could persuade her after the movie to come back to my place. Obviously this didn't work as she said she was going to be out beforehand. As well, the movie only started at 10 p.m but I told her to meet for 9:15. This was because we had only met once before and I wanted some time to get to know her and get her comfortable with me, so she'd be willing to come to my place after.
Arrived 10 minutes after 9:15. Was completely planned, to build up intrigue. She was waiting for me inside and was looking very fine! Very attracted to well dressed women who know how to put themselves together. She definitely does! Right off the bat, I went in for a hug to set the tone physically. We got in line and begin conversation. I also decided I would take Chase's advice of not paying for her. Didn't want it to be awkward at the register when asked how are you paying, so when they called us up, I just put my hand on her back and motioned that she could go ahead. Worked flawlessly. Paid for our tickets and suggested we walk to a close bookstore, as we had time before the movie. She agreed, walked over and had pretty light hearted, fun banter. Definitely was getting flirty vibes at this point.
Walked back to the movie theatre and found seats. In the past I have wondered how to physically touch a girl in a movie you are interested in sexually, without portraying to much intimacy. I feel like holding hands is very intimate and something couples exclusively do. As well, Putting your arm around the girl can be very uncomfortable. I find the best way to physically touch a woman in a movie, is by placing your hand on her thigh. It can be highly sexual and definitely turn the girl on. Movie ended 12:20ish and I knew this would be the most crucial part of the night. We came in separate cars, but I suggested that she come over to hang out as it wasn't so late. She gave me some excuses about having to pick up her sister but I insisted she come for a bit. She said she would but would have to leave real shortly to get her sister.
I live with my parents when I'm in town from school, so I took her straight to the basement when we arrived at my place. Even as we're going down she's saying she has to leave in like 10 mins. There is a bedroom down there, but I took her to a couch in the main room instead. Could have been my first mistake, but I thought I could make the transition eventually. In the first 5 minutes I make my move and we start hooking up. She receives it well and is a great kisser! Hence the DSL! She keeps telling me though she has to go and I only have a few minutes to kiss her, to which I just say it's not that late and attempt to continue kissing. After a couple minutes I try to get her legs on the couch, where again she insists its time she goes. I just had enough and was like okay, go ahead. Looking back, I feel like I should have just continued escalation and ignored her or exaggerated how late it was, but we learn from our mistakes. As she gets up, she makes a comment about how she knows what kind of guy I am and thinks I got what I want from her. As she leaves my door, I pull her back for a hug and she goes for a kiss and I turn away jokingly but then kiss her. After the night I was upset with myself for a couple reasons. A) Did not withstand LMR and escalate 2) Should have never complied with her time limits- Should have been unaffected and shown I didn't care if she left. I feel like I came off as a bit too needy.
Next day: Sunday
Me 7:00 p.m: Nightmares from the movie last night?
Her 8:39 p.m: Are you kidding. I can take those guys
Me: Ha sure brown belt (she used to do karate). You were basically on top of me the entire movie.
Her:Are you complaining?
Me: Just as much as you were complaining when we hooked up (she wasn't...)
Her: Oh really? Because I remember you being pretty into it
Me: Well you weren't an aweful kisser...
Her: GLad you think so. You weren't terrible either
I never responded. Here's where I'd love some advice:
I knew I wouldn't be back in town for another month so I was confused if and when to message her next. I've read Franco's posts on not having check in texts and only texts to set up dates, cause you will come off as too available. After a week of not texting her I heard through my friend who introduced us (DSL PART 1), that he heard from DSL's good friend she was upset I hadn't been messaging her and that she was asking her friends for advice on me. I took this opportunity to message her and we spoke for a bit. My question is, do I continue to message her periodically till I'm back or do I cut communication till I can ask her to chill? I've waited for her to initiate since then, but she continues to play hard to get and has still yet to initiate. I definitely want to see her again and use her DSL for what they were made for!
Sorry for the BOOK. Probably should cut down on details, but you guys really got it all...
SLY
" This way she knows she's in your thoughts and it keeps you in hers. She will ask you questions and it's up to you how you deal with them. If you decide to answer make them open ended with tons of intrigue, try not to answer directly.