Discrete Approach??

[Zorex]

Oi guys,

I have been a vivid reader on the main site and the forums and I absolutely love what you guys are doing. It has drasticly changed my perspective on social situations. I now have a way better read on how to handle girls and it has given me a confidence-boost. But my skill level is still far away from where I want it to be. Probably because I dont have that much reference experience build up yet. I keep running into a problem when I want to get more reference experience at parties. Maybe you guys can help me out.

In my (I hope not to narrowminded) opinion there are two kinds of parties:
1. parties where you dont know anyone or maybe just a person or 2 (e.g. friends with whom you are there)
2. parties where your whole social circle goes, meaning that you know a lot of folks there (like fraternity parties)

Somehow it is a lot more easy for me to approach girls at the first kind of party. This is because I will never see those girls again anyway. So when I mess things up in my approach or conversation it doesnt matter.

Problems start to occur at the second kind of party, where I'm not that anonymous anymore. I then get a lot of AA and I hardly approach new girls.

So do you guys have tips with approaching girls in a way that you dont stand out? That the approach happens in a more discrete manner?

It would be much appriciated

-Zorex

 

[Fuck This]

I hear you on social situations where you know few people = easier to kinda let it all hang out.

When I am surrounded by acquaintances, I try to include the girls in group conversations that are going the direction I want. If you have mates who will reciprocate your complimentary stories about them, you can generally get a group of girls hooked into a conversation. Hell it could be about Hometowns or High school Mascots or the best place on campus to grab coffee.
My point being, meeting girls should be a group thing. That is unless your buddies try to make each other look bad...

I've got a group of running friends who have become "Eskimo brothers and sisters" from this approach over time. it all started with a Wednesday night run, and grabbing a beer after. We are all sweaty and stinky, so there is a group camaraderie at that point. Of course there is the mention of a group run somewhere cool this weekend, and "Hey I'll text you where we are meeting..."

But the important thing is within the group in a social situation there is no overt kino, makeouts, just a "low pressure -family-all for one" vibe.

 

[Zorex]

Thanks TwoRocky!

Youre right, when I am in social situations where I dont know tons of people its easier to loosen up. And in other social situations that group approach might work. I have some questions however: suppose you have included some girls in your group conversation, how do you go on from there? When do you make a move on the girl you like? And how do you do that in a way that is still under the radar?

 

[Fuck This]

Every situation is different of course. Usually I will find a way to make the conversation with my target girl a one on one conversation within the group. Then a Step or two outside the circle, puts you one on one.

Maybe you say "Let's go grab another drink from the bar and you can tell me about your skydiving experience".(or something she revealed about herself)
Alternately, you can say "I want to hear more about....but I need to grab some fresh air. Join me." or When you are an old fart like me..., "With this background noise is hard for me to hear you come out on the deck so I can hear you. better"

But for these to work she needs to be hooked in your one on one conversation. Eye contact, squared up stance with you, back and forth conversation.