I have never gone down on a girl. I have slept with probably half a hundred and gotten many a blowjob. I have no desire to perform cunnilingus. Will girls discredit my sexual capability or write me off completely for this? It's not that I can't, I just would never do it of my own accord. I've read some articles online and some women clearly feel strongly that it's a requirement because it feels so good. Others don't really like it. Should I bring it up with a girl I'm sleeping with, or only if she brings it up first?
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JimmyB,
Women are funny though. Asking is a bad thing, especially with women. Doesn't mean you shove yourself onto her in all aspects of her life, which is what all males do.
But i guess 'pre-launch' is the success of all things. 'Pre-launch' means you gauge and gradual small steps heading to the direction of where you want to go. Sounds cliche but life has been rehash for millions of years.
Zac
Women are funny though. Asking is a bad thing, especially with women. Doesn't mean you shove yourself onto her in all aspects of her life, which is what all males do.
But i guess 'pre-launch' is the success of all things. 'Pre-launch' means you gauge and gradual small steps heading to the direction of where you want to go. Sounds cliche but life has been rehash for millions of years.
Zac
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JimmyB said:
JimmyB said:
Don't knock it 'til you try it.
And I'd say it's a good idea to get your face all juicy from time to time. Some girls definitely want it.
A girl I had been seeing for awhile sat me down and complained that I hadn't been giving as much as I had been receiving. Or in other words, she willing and enthusiastically pleasured me regularly while I rarely ate her obento box. This was despite me making sure she had orgasmic good sex every time we had sex. And the sex often improved over time, because we experimented a bit and found some really fun stuff.
She was pretty upset.
I wasn't much a fan of doing it, until I had a couple really good experiences.
I now know that:
1. The same pussy may taste different on different days.
2.When it tastes good, it can taste incredible.
3. 69 is one of my favorite position for cunnilingus. Man underneath and woman on all fours on top. I can play with her tits while she sucks me off, which allows me to happily go to town for a long time, while also being much more aroused and enthusiastic about it.
Should you decide to try it out (you just might like it) I recommend you listen to her directions, don't be afraid to ask how she likes it and read the cunnilingus articles here on GC so you go in with some basics.
Side note: I'm inclined to think that healthy eating makes the pussy juicy better tasting.
J Wick you have some good points. It's just weird because I've been with a lot of women and this has never come up. I'm wondering if girls are thinking the same thing as your girl. Probably they are and don't want to come out with it directly. I'll read those articles.
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JimmyB,
We just don't realize how women do not feel comfortable, especially the slut shaming by society.
Zac
JimmyB said:
We just don't realize how women do not feel comfortable, especially the slut shaming by society.
Zac
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Do what YOU want to do.
How masculine is it for a woman making you submit to a sexual favor you have zero inclination to do?
If they don't like it they can walk... though its not something I think would be a deal breaker relationship wise (whether LTR or casual).
Best regards,
-Rob
How masculine is it for a woman making you submit to a sexual favor you have zero inclination to do?
If they don't like it they can walk... though its not something I think would be a deal breaker relationship wise (whether LTR or casual).
Best regards,
-Rob
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Jimmy,
It's probably not an issue if you're regularly giving these girls orgasms vaginally from intercourse, but it certainly could be an issue if it's preventing you from giving girls -- that you're regularly seeing -- orgasms on a regular basis.
For me, I see oral sex as the "easy orgasm" to please my girl if I'm not really feeling up to giving her amazing sex. I give girls orgasms very easily these days through oral, and it's pretty low-effort on my part. So when I know my girl is horny and she's needing some lovin', then I decide which way I want to please her. If I'm particularly not horny (or maybe so horny that I want to give her oral AND have intercourse with her), then I'll make sure she gets off orally before we do anything else. This usually satisfies her urge, and she'll love that you're a skilled enough man that you can deliver her orgasms any day, any way, and at any time.
- Franco
It's probably not an issue if you're regularly giving these girls orgasms vaginally from intercourse, but it certainly could be an issue if it's preventing you from giving girls -- that you're regularly seeing -- orgasms on a regular basis.
For me, I see oral sex as the "easy orgasm" to please my girl if I'm not really feeling up to giving her amazing sex. I give girls orgasms very easily these days through oral, and it's pretty low-effort on my part. So when I know my girl is horny and she's needing some lovin', then I decide which way I want to please her. If I'm particularly not horny (or maybe so horny that I want to give her oral AND have intercourse with her), then I'll make sure she gets off orally before we do anything else. This usually satisfies her urge, and she'll love that you're a skilled enough man that you can deliver her orgasms any day, any way, and at any time.
- Franco
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As someone who still has issues lasting in the bedroom (Round 1 is always super hard for me), giving a girl oral is one of the ways I can still get a girl off (and I've gotten pretty damn good at it, compliments every time). Especially since I've had the experience of losing girls I'm sleeping with because I"m not giving them enough orgasms.
I personally would do it, but only of your own volition. Like Mr. Rob said it doesn't sound masculine to submit because she's making you; but maybe make it a reward for something?
I personally would do it, but only of your own volition. Like Mr. Rob said it doesn't sound masculine to submit because she's making you; but maybe make it a reward for something?
Franco said:
Franco,
- Do you just use your tongue or do you also use your finger(s) inside her?
- Do you pull back the clitoral hood while licking?
- How fast do you use your tongue?
- Do you do an up and down motion or just lick in random directions?
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Kaelos,
Both. =)
I think this depends on the girl. Sometimes some girls have a more concealed clit, so pulling back the hood might be necessary if it seems like she's not getting enough direct stimulation.
I start out with relatively random motions/tempo just to get her anxious and excited, but once I consider it "go" time for her to orgasm, I lick deep and with a decent amount of force right on her clitoral area in a repeated motion with the exact same tempo all the way until climax. This can be fast or slow as long as you maintain then same tempo and put a decent amount of pressure with your tongue.
Once I'm going for orgasm, I just do the exact same lick (usually down to up) repeatedly until orgasm. I also shift my head and move my body with hers if she starts to move around (which she usually does as she gets closer to climax) so that I can continue to apply the exact same amount of pressure and tempo all the way until she climaxes. [NOTE: If you're not sure when she's actually there, just keep going until she aggressively pushes your head away. Once she's finished, her clitoris will be extremely sensitive to the point where even the smallest contact will drive her wild, so she'll have to push your head away so that she can recover. It's always fun to watch that part ]
- Franco
Both. =)
I think this depends on the girl. Sometimes some girls have a more concealed clit, so pulling back the hood might be necessary if it seems like she's not getting enough direct stimulation.
I start out with relatively random motions/tempo just to get her anxious and excited, but once I consider it "go" time for her to orgasm, I lick deep and with a decent amount of force right on her clitoral area in a repeated motion with the exact same tempo all the way until climax. This can be fast or slow as long as you maintain then same tempo and put a decent amount of pressure with your tongue.
Once I'm going for orgasm, I just do the exact same lick (usually down to up) repeatedly until orgasm. I also shift my head and move my body with hers if she starts to move around (which she usually does as she gets closer to climax) so that I can continue to apply the exact same amount of pressure and tempo all the way until she climaxes. [NOTE: If you're not sure when she's actually there, just keep going until she aggressively pushes your head away. Once she's finished, her clitoris will be extremely sensitive to the point where even the smallest contact will drive her wild, so she'll have to push your head away so that she can recover. It's always fun to watch that part
]- Franco
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Typically, you'll hear guys talk about going down on a girl as a means to make her orgasms from vaginal sex easier.
However, I'm a huge proponent of eating a girl just to do it; waking her up early in the morning with it, feeling her legs convulse, digging her nails into the back of my neck pulling me in deeper. It's very hard to find sexual experiences that top that for me.
However, I'm a huge proponent of eating a girl just to do it; waking her up early in the morning with it, feeling her legs convulse, digging her nails into the back of my neck pulling me in deeper. It's very hard to find sexual experiences that top that for me.
Franco said:
Thank you for the awesome response Franco.
- How many fingers do you use?
- What kind of motion do you do with your finger(s)? Straight in/out or come hither g-spot style motion?
- Do you match your finger(s) to the tempo that your tongue is moving?
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Kaelos,
One or two, usually. Going for more than two causes you to have less control over the motion, but it can feel good for her if you want to temporarily stick more in there... =)
The "come hither" motion is what I mostly use.
It doesn't necessarily need to match the tempo of your tongue, but your fingers should definitely have a constant tempo as well. It can be a different tempo (if you're capable of coordinating two different motions in two different tempos), but it should definitely be consistent -- just like your tongue.
- Franco
One or two, usually. Going for more than two causes you to have less control over the motion, but it can feel good for her if you want to temporarily stick more in there... =)
The "come hither" motion is what I mostly use.
It doesn't necessarily need to match the tempo of your tongue, but your fingers should definitely have a constant tempo as well. It can be a different tempo (if you're capable of coordinating two different motions in two different tempos), but it should definitely be consistent -- just like your tongue.
- Franco
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Jimmy-
Nah, doesn't discredit you any... with most girls. I spent a little time to learn good oral sex technique in the beginning, and since then I've rarely used it. Girlfriends will occasionally whine about it a bit ("I want my pussy licked!"), and I still give it to them on occasion, but only when I feel like it. Which isn't super often. So long as you are sexually satisfying them (and there aren't any major problems in the relationship) it's not remotely an issue.
The reason a lot of women online report oral sex being a big thing or a deal breaker, I firmly believe, is because most men aren't any good at providing non-oral orgasms to women. For many women, because they've never had an orgasm from anything other than clit-licking, cunnilingus is their sole path to non-masturbatory orgasm.
If you provide powerful vaginal orgasms to a girl, though, she won't care too much about oral sex. It's fun if you do it, adds some nice variety, but it's not terrible if she doesn't get it for a while.
And if you provide powerful anal orgasms to a girl, oral sex becomes even less of a thing for her, since she's used to powerful deep orgasms in her vagina from your cock, and powerful deep orgasms in her anus from your cock, and small fun orgasms in her clitoris just seem less exciting by comparison.
Still great for foreplay, or if you enjoy oral a lot (and I know many guys do), it can still be loads of fun for her.
However, it's optional if you're good at providing other paths to pleasure / satisfaction.
Chase
Nah, doesn't discredit you any... with most girls. I spent a little time to learn good oral sex technique in the beginning, and since then I've rarely used it. Girlfriends will occasionally whine about it a bit ("I want my pussy licked!"), and I still give it to them on occasion, but only when I feel like it. Which isn't super often. So long as you are sexually satisfying them (and there aren't any major problems in the relationship) it's not remotely an issue.
The reason a lot of women online report oral sex being a big thing or a deal breaker, I firmly believe, is because most men aren't any good at providing non-oral orgasms to women. For many women, because they've never had an orgasm from anything other than clit-licking, cunnilingus is their sole path to non-masturbatory orgasm.
If you provide powerful vaginal orgasms to a girl, though, she won't care too much about oral sex. It's fun if you do it, adds some nice variety, but it's not terrible if she doesn't get it for a while.
And if you provide powerful anal orgasms to a girl, oral sex becomes even less of a thing for her, since she's used to powerful deep orgasms in her vagina from your cock, and powerful deep orgasms in her anus from your cock, and small fun orgasms in her clitoris just seem less exciting by comparison.
Still great for foreplay, or if you enjoy oral a lot (and I know many guys do), it can still be loads of fun for her.
However, it's optional if you're good at providing other paths to pleasure / satisfaction.
Chase