Don’t Like Drinking/Smoking/Partying Much; Am I Some Kind Of Prude?

[Rage]

Hey what’s up guys? I’ve wondered about this topic and have wondered about it for a while.

And wanted to ask about it wondering what you guys think but also wondering if there are other people in the same camp as me (btw I fucking hate posting in general board all the time; I’ve been chilling at home these past three months, but am moving out soon, will have some reports coming !)

Something that girls comment on a lot about me, so I guess you could say is true is that I’m a health freak. I don’t think I’m THAT healthy or that I am THAT much in shape (as much as girls will fucking say) but I do enjoy being healthy and do enjoy being in shape.

From the time I’ve been little I always ate pretty healthy at home. Since I was born really. Lots of vegetables cooked with spices and many different recipes, grazing nearly all organic chicken and meat and fish (what I ate at home) and a lot of rice. My parents raised me well here I think because they forced nothing, I got to eat any fast food I wanted any soda or junk food or ice cream I wanted, but I would also happen to get healthy food habitually just for meals because that was what my whole family ate. So I just never ended up eating that much crap anyway.

Anyway that’s kind of a tangent but why I mention that is that I today now grown up and stuff stemming back from the healthy eating of my childhood development, like eating fairly clean whole food that tastes good. Ill eat junk food once ina while but I never really enjoy it as much as I do healthy food because of how it makes me feel (healthy food makes me feel better). So I don’t eat it that often.

And I feel this same way about drinking/smoking/and partying.

I’ve done all three and fucked around with some other stuff a little bit from around 15 or 16 years old but I never enjoyed it much and got much out of it. I don’t mind smoking a bit with a friend or going out for a drink. But I don’t like doing it any more than like a tiny bit… and I could extremely easily never do them again and not miss it.

Now especially as I work to further my powerlifting more and more and I have to get increasingly more dedicated as the months come and the weights keep getting heavier, I find myself cleaning up my diet more and avoiding smoking once in a while drinking once in a while staying up late etc. because it doesn’t help me towards my goals.

People like to do that stuff though right (I ask myself)? I’m drunk Im high Ill enjoy it but then walking away from it I never enjoy it that much on like a deeper happiness level. I’m not sure why that is; but I feel it within me so I listen to that and just mostly stay away from that stuff now (at least on a regular basis).

Is that crazy or odd? Are there others here who feel a bit the same way? I’ll read a report from hector or rdawg of drunken nights and think a bit (the breaking thought just barely enters my head) that “fuck that sounds like fun, what if I could enjoy it more when I do that stuff”. Ive had drunken nights drunken fun with friends and makeouts (no lays) but I always come away not enjoying it that much not liking it that much, just how I am, I’d rather be me fully present fully self and healthy at that… maybe I grew up at too young an age, or am turning into an old fart at too young an age.

I’m not guilty about how I feel and believe how you feel is never wrong and only denying what you feel within you is wrong. But I am curious to the root of this and what the results and other variables at play here are. I love daygame, love fucking girls, love lifting and the high I get it beats all else, and love all my other hobbies.

But still wonder about this shit…

Maybe this is one of the things that separates guys that do exclusively daygame/online from guys who mix in night game too (besides the type of girls you get)? Hmmm…

 

[Rage]

If other people want to party themselves into mediocre, average, drama-fueled lives...then that is no skin off my back or yours.

Funny you mention this, I have a couple average friends from high school who I never hit up but i will see a few times a year (if run into them coincidentally at the gym and have time to kick it), and they're the ones out of my own friends who are into this stuff more.

Ambitious friends of mine/goal oriented friends of mine arent into this stuff at all either like me! Fuck hey i didnt even think about that or realize that!! Lol thanks drexel ... Preferences change within people over time and are also different in some people than they are in others I suppose huh?

Gem

 

[Rage]

If other people want to party themselves into mediocre, average, drama-fueled lives...then that is no skin off my back or yours.

Funny you mention this, I have a couple average friends from high school who I never hit up but i will see a few times a year (if run into them coincidentally at the gym and have time to kick it), and they're the ones out of my own friends who are into this stuff more.

Ambitious friends of mine/goal oriented friends of mine arent into this stuff at all either like me! Fuck hey i didnt even think about that or realize that!! Lol thanks drexel ... Preferences change within people over time and are also different in some people than they are in others I suppose huh?

Gem

 

[Rusty]

The thing that nobody likes talking about is that...

most high level men and women don't party (all that often or at all) and they don't drink much, or smoke, or go to nightclubs and bars frequently.

Most of the really beautiful and sophisticated and talented and smart women that I've met have been very social but not very hedonistic creatures. They enjoy parties and gatherings and they do go to bars and clubs every once in a while, but it's not really their scene. Nor do they tend to be piss drunk or act crazy and dance or grind on men on the dance floor.

Usually this is because they tend to be social, but have a slight reserved quality about them, and they're a lot more conscious about social reputation, and they keep up the appearance of being "classy". They're a lot more socially adjusted, cool people to talk to as well.

At least this is the case with women that I've met.

That's why day game can be so much better for most guys; they'll meet women who are much more down to earth, "normal", chill types who have stable lives, have careers, are focused, more ambitious and more likely to enjoy a good conversation. Some of the women I've met in bars and clubs can't hold a conversation. Granted, the environment isn't conducive to deep conversations, but still. Nighttime venues attract certain types of women.

I think it's great that you live a healthy and active lifestyle. It's very attractive to women. It bodes well for your biochemistry and your health is a strong passive factor in attracting women; you'll be giving off a better scent, your physique is appealing and you just look better in your clothes when you're in shape.

You can meet plenty awesome women without ever stepping into a bar or club.

 

[mb1]

Hey Gem, I was pushing parties to you as a way to add some social value (which can absolutely be done sober), though you may find it funny that I basically don't drink at all either. College is going to put binging on display, but it hampers all kinds of goals (given the science regarding its effect on exercise recovery) and just plain getting shit done. Mark Cuban doesn't have time to get plastered and recover more nights than not in the week, right? He's probably up answering emails before breakfast. Seriously just look around at how less disciplined everyone else is and just smile knowing that's what makes the winner in the end.

Everybody here seems pretty similar in that we research how to do things better. I used to wake at 4:30 a.m. to eat, digest, and learn to squat. I've made spreadsheets tracking every micro nutrient, even.

Storz and Bickle make the best lung saving devices, but if you only take away one thing, remember - Carlson's Cod Liver Oil

Haha so yeah, you're not alone, and I agree with Drexel and Rusty completely.

 

[Richard]

I'd guess and say that you're more introverted than extroverted on the scale. Everybody is bi-verted in that they are capable of exhibiting both introverted and extroverted tendencies/personality traits but one is always stronger than the other.

There's a theory that introverts are constantly confronted with stimuli and their minds are always racing and absorbing stimuli so it takes a lot less environmental stimuli to excite us which is why introverts are able to enjoy time alone with a book because that's enough stimuli to finish filling our cup basically. The theory also states that extroverts require a lot more stimuli to become excited and thus seek out environments where the mood is very action-y, and high energy (like parties, drinking, etc.) because they require massive amounts of stimulus to become excited.

By guessing that you're an introvert I'm saying that you don't need all of that excess stimulus to be excited or feel pleasure/or feel alive so you stay away from them. Also, introverts in high energy environments tend to not fare so well because all of the stimuli causes an overload. If this sounds like you then you may just be more introverted than extroverted and there's nothing wrong with that at all.

-Richard

 

[Drck]

You are doing the right thing, exercising, eating healthy,... The problem is with society, if for example most of your peers smoke pot, don't exercise and eat all the junk out there, you are the one who appears rather "unusual", who doesn't fit in, who is isolated introvert... You may seem that you are trying to look better than your peers, that you are moving on with your life, thus many may actually dislike you because you make them feel bad about themselves... They should actually feel bad, there is no reason to live unhealthy and feel great about it... Weird stuff, everything is backwards...

I believe that if you find group of people of your age with similar life style, that you can actually quite easily move out of the "introvert shell".

----------
Richard: "There's a theory that introverts are constantly confronted with stimuli and their minds are always racing and absorbing stimuli so it takes a lot less environmental stimuli to excite us .... The theory also states that extroverts require a lot more stimuli to become excited and thus seek out environments where the mood is very action-y, and high energy (like parties...."
>>>> IMO it also might be because lots of extroverts are naturally in better and more lighter mood, they don't take things too seriously, thus it is easier for them to go out and have fun.

Thought process:
* Introvert (me): Go out and smoke pot? No, it has lots of carcinogens, even smoking from second hand causes problems and I want to be healthy. It costs extra money, I'm on the budget now because I'm saving for X. Pot is an entry door for another drugs anyway, and I would probably ended up drinking more than I intended, then I'll feel sick the whole second day, and then three days after I'll still feel like crap... Fuck that I'm not going...

* Extrovert: Fuck yea, let's go out, I got some extra money to spend, life is short so let's have fun, there is gonna be lots of girls! Life is great, let's smash something into pieces!

So because of the thought process, the introvert may not be that excited about going to the party, he simply doesn't find it that exciting.

 

[Rusty]

Keep in mind, introversion and extraversion are not so much two fixed traits with an either-or, but rather two ends on a spectrum. Most people tend to be towards the middle of the spectrum, and some are more "introverted" and others more "extraverted". This isn't so much a trait as it is a tendency and, like Richard said, our brain's ability to handle stimuli and the need for it.

If you are more introverted, you'll likely be more overwhelmed and become drained from extended periods of socializing/ stimuli overload, and you'll need time to "recharge" or rest in solitude or lower energy environments, whereas those who are wired towards being extraverted are energized and even seek further stimuli, generally in the form of socializing or other adrenaline-inducing activities.

I wouldn't go as far as to say that if you're introverted or extraverted that you are X, or you are Y. These tendencies speak to dispositions and temperaments that suggest one would be more inclined towards certain behaviors. It doesn't mean that "introverts" don't like to party or extraverts are adrenaline junkies and social butterflies. Some of the most social and well-adjusted men and women I've met are self-proclaimed introverts. It's very possible for introverts to have extraverted personalities and tendencies, it's more likely that on a biological level, they may be burned out quicker and more easily because their brains don't handle stimuli the same way that extraverted people do.

That's the biggest difference: the way we gain or spend our energy.

 

[Lotus]

It's interesting because I'm one of those that sits on the extrovert side of the spectrum and I literally start to go crazy if I go too long without getting the necessary stimuli.

On average 2 times a week is enough, but if I don't get 2 solid days of socialization throughout the week I feel like a loser. Not that I think being introverted is bad, I just can't live like that consistently.

It seems like partying is a way to get all of that stimuli really fast in one sitting.

I wonder if there is correlation between between being introverted and how much validation you receive as a kid. For example introverts being more likely to have not received the same levels of validation from family and friends when growing up.

Maybe not, just a thought.

 

[Drck]

"If you are more introverted, you'll likely be more overwhelmed and become drained from extended periods of socializing/ stimuli overload, and you'll need time to "recharge" or rest in solitude or lower energy environments"

Good topic & Interesting point. But say, that you have two extroverts, and one for example likes a lot Social studies (or communication class, whatever) and the other can't stand it. The first one will have naturally high participation, he would be contributing a lot, whereas the other would participate minimally, as he can't stand that class. So what he's going to do? He's going to shut down, introvert, he can't wait till he leaves... Does this classify him as introvert? IMO there is no stimulus overload, he simply doesn't care about that type of stimulation at first place, he will never come back to that group "recharged". In contrary, he might be seeking another group that will stimulate his interest...

The same is IMO in society, i.e. within different groups of people. You have different groups of people, these groups generally discuss different things or focus on different things. You may be natural extrovert, outgoing and friendly, but if the group you are in constantly discuss clothes, food or going to the mall which you don't really care about, most likely you will stop socializing with this group. Are you an introvert?

If another group will be discussing where to get drunk and what drugs to buy, you may not be exactly excited either about being a part of that group, if your interest is in health and exercise. Does that make that person bigger introvert?

Now say you are considered introvert for many years but you really like math. So you join some math club, and now you see that everybody freely talks about math, they have different ideas, projects to work on, solving different formulas and so on. You really like that, you are stimulated. So you will eventually start participating the same way, you will become extrovert in that group because that is what you naturally like. Maybe you do the same with two other groups, say seduction and investment. So what is the person now, introvert or extrovert...?

I could be wrong, but this happened to me several times, I'm simply more introverted or more extroverted based on how I fit that particular group...

Just a thought...

 

[Mr.Rob]

You always strike me as being pretty grounded in your own reality and not to swayed by groupthink/social pressure, which made me surprised that you asked this question.

As Drexel says "Do what YOU want to DO" and I would add "what is cool is whatever YOU deem cool".

I'm not surprised low consciousness activities that partying derives from (an easy escape from life to this false fleeting reality) don't interest you.

You come across as being more worried about achievement and prospering than chasing some dirty high across town.

Your frame. Your reality. Everyone else, though you empathize where their coming from, has it twisted. Your not a prude. Their just lazy and destined to mediocrity. Which is fine. Nothing wrong with mediocre. Not everyone can be the boss in life.

Don't doubt yourself

Keep it pimpin

-Rob

 

[Rage]

You always strike me as being pretty grounded in your own reality and not to swayed by groupthink/social pressure, which made me surprised that you asked this question.

As Drexel says "Do what YOU want to DO" and I would add "what is cool is whatever YOU deem cool".

I'm not surprised low consciousness activities that partying derives from (an easy escape from life to this false fleeting reality) don't interest you.

You come across as being more worried about achievement and prospering than chasing some dirty high across town.

Your frame. Your reality. Everyone else, though you empathize where their coming from, has it twisted. Your not a prude. Their just lazy and destined to mediocrity. Which is fine. Nothing wrong with mediocre. Not everyone can be the boss in life.

Don't doubt yourself

Keep it pimpin

-Rob

definitely was just curious about it bro,not worried about it! haha... can't help how i feel, and wouldnt throw my obessions/convictions for just about anything.

 

[Rage]

Hey good discussion guys.

I happen to be incredibly, extremely introverted and only started understanding that really deeply within the last couple of years. I can be outgoing get on great with others, as a little kid would like being the center of attention and the life of the party; but the flipside is I can only be around people very little without feeling the intense need to get away and get back to myself and my own mind.

I feel like everyone is fucking influencing me too much, and just like a 10 minute chat with some average person is affecting me and drives me a bit crazy. Despite being extremely introverted though I still feel that it is a spectrum definitely.

I’d argue that I’ve been introverted almost since I was born though. Last year I got to watch a bunch of baby videos of mine for the first time. I still watch them once in a while.

I was a “gifted child” (ugh fuck that term) and learned to speak and talk at a really young age. I have videos of me at 2 years old, having full conversations with my parents and being full of questions and ideas. I had a good memory as well, and my mom taught me to recite a lot of prayers and poetry that I memorized, as well as some books she would read me (that I memorized too from her reading me; astonishing my parents friends at this two year old who can read… but isn’t actually reading lol).

Anyway, from those videos the one thing I was fucking blown away by wasn’t that I was a fairly sharp kid at that age, but it was how incredibly similar I was then to how I still am now.

I would just want to play with my blocks or my toys or my pots and pans and would be intensely focused playing with them, and my mom would be telling me (at 2 years old) gem sing that one song say that one prayer, and I’d say them a bit impatiently line by line just appeasing her but not really giving a shit, more focused on my work.

I’m still that same way.

Parents want to mold me tell me what to do, society and parents and teachers and authority figures wanna tell me what to do and say what the think and feel and believe and all these people and influences and external stimuli constantly bombard with all this fucking noise. But I just wanna do my thing and be away from that ignore all that and work on my projects.

Create cool stuff, build cool stuff, make things and pour my energies and heart and drive into my convictions.

Nikola Tesla said “I do not think there is any thrill that can go through the human heart like that felt by the inventor as he sees some creation of the brain unfolding to success... such emotions make a man forget food, sleep, friends, love, everything.”

And I feel that way a fucking lot, more than a “normal” person probably ever would. Like fuck everything else fuck everyone else bombarding me talking and saying things too suggesting things or influencing me. I have work I need to do important things that have to be worked on by me and no one else.

I thrive in isolation. My myers brigg type (think myers brigg is a bit controversial perhaps but I like the descriptions enough to feel they have some slight credibility at least) is INTJ http://bit.ly/1dbQO2I and so are many of my mentors and past people I look up to. Nikola Tesla’s an intj, elon musk’s an intj, Arnie Schwarzenegger intj, and actually a sizeable list more of people who’s ideas seem to have especially resonate with me just coincidentally fit that same myers brigg type as me.

Forgive me, but I’d suspect Chase to be the INTJ type too. I had a talk with Chase about influences once and what he suggested and what he does for himself is what I want to one day fully commit to: most of time fully away from other people/things/ influences/ stimuli, occasional time with like minded friends who’s qualities you want the influence of, and other periods many of them perhaps where you are in deep isolation away from like everything and everyone (just your ideas your creativity your work, and the most purposeful things to you remain and nothing else is there). Other than that you can have infrequent time looking at pop culture or average folk just to see where the zeitgeist is currently.

So a bit of a long reply by me but yeah I am very excessively introverted, and I’ve had to set a lot of rules about it for myself as to who I spend time with and how often. Even if I like someone a ton or if I really like a girl I still couldn’t see them too often and would need days apart from them (a couple times a week would be ideal).

Yikes and I can’t imagine living with anyone too…. Haha it’s all fucked up and I have a lot of things regarding this I need to figure out for myself in the future, but well at least I’m sort of leaning in the right direction at the present moment…

Gem

 

[Richard]

Richard: "There's a theory that introverts are constantly confronted with stimuli and their minds are always racing and absorbing stimuli so it takes a lot less environmental stimuli to excite us .... The theory also states that extroverts require a lot more stimuli to become excited and thus seek out environments where the mood is very action-y, and high energy (like parties...."
>>>> IMO it also might be because lots of extroverts are naturally in better and more lighter mood, they don't take things too seriously, thus it is easier for them to go out and have fun.

Thought process:
* Introvert (me): Go out and smoke pot? No, it has lots of carcinogens, even smoking from second hand causes problems and I want to be healthy. It costs extra money, I'm on the budget now because I'm saving for X. Pot is an entry door for another drugs anyway, and I would probably ended up drinking more than I intended, then I'll feel sick the whole second day, and then three days after I'll still feel like crap... Fuck that I'm not going...

* Extrovert: Fuck yea, let's go out, I got some extra money to spend, life is short so let's have fun, there is gonna be lots of girls! Life is great, let's smash something into pieces!

So because of the thought process, the introvert may not be that excited about going to the party, he simply doesn't find it that exciting.

Here's the difference in our views; mine is backed by science, and yours is backed by opinion. There's no influence of having an introverted or extroverted temperament that determines a persons mood. Extroverts are not naturally in a better or lighter mood - these are two very different parts of the brain.

Furthermore, thought processes are byproducts of an action or inaction. Your decision to smoke or party occurs before you have any conscious thought patterns to explain that decision. So, an introvert will "decide" to not go out and party but then they have a thought process that occurs as a result of that "decision" so people feel like they are talking themselves into or out of something.

Good topic & Interesting point. But say, that you have two extroverts, and one for example likes a lot Social studies (or communication class, whatever) and the other can't stand it. The first one will have naturally high participation, he would be contributing a lot, whereas the other would participate minimally, as he can't stand that class. So what he's going to do? He's going to shut down, introvert, he can't wait till he leaves... Does this classify him as introvert? IMO there is no stimulus overload, he simply doesn't care about that type of stimulation at first place, he will never come back to that group "recharged". In contrary, he might be seeking another group that will stimulate his interest...

The same is IMO in society, i.e. within different groups of people. You have different groups of people, these groups generally discuss different things or focus on different things. You may be natural extrovert, outgoing and friendly, but if the group you are in constantly discuss clothes, food or going to the mall which you don't really care about, most likely you will stop socializing with this group. Are you an introvert?

If another group will be discussing where to get drunk and what drugs to buy, you may not be exactly excited either about being a part of that group, if your interest is in health and exercise. Does that make that person bigger introvert?

Now say you are considered introvert for many years but you really like math. So you join some math club, and now you see that everybody freely talks about math, they have different ideas, projects to work on, solving different formulas and so on. You really like that, you are stimulated. So you will eventually start participating the same way, you will become extrovert in that group because that is what you naturally like. Maybe you do the same with two other groups, say seduction and investment. So what is the person now, introvert or extrovert...?

I could be wrong, but this happened to me several times, I'm simply more introverted or more extroverted based on how I fit that particular group...

Just a thought...

I get the feeling that you misunderstood my point. Your examples have almost no relation to the point I made. Either that or you don't quite understand how introversion and extroversion relate to socializing.

-Richard

 

[Raqimus]

Very interesting thread, side note I score an infp but i would say i'm more isfp.

I am incredibly introverted and I enjoy socializing. I love parties and talking to people but I can only do it for so long because I've built up my tolerance through working in retail. Afterwards I need to recharge for a few hours, depending on my energy levels, it may even take 30 minutes so i can socialize for another four hours.

I've learned how to switch myself into that extroverted role and when to pull myself back into my introversion, I would say that is because I understand myself; not completely but I know myself to some extent and I'm still learning. You could try going to a party and just melding with the vibe; thats if you want to get into the party scene without getting drunk or high or shit.

I like drugs, and alcohol but i don't have the time, money, or connections(drugs) to do them, so i don't. These days I drink a whole lot less; used to be 7+ beers an outing now i might have 1 or 2. I don't need it to let loose.

All in all gem, do you; your not a prude hahaha.

*Edit: Richard would you say that extroverts have an easier time getting into a better mood since they are easily stimulated, and introverts are more drawn to darker moods which are caused by excessive thinking and rumination.

 

[Drck]

Not that it matters Richard, but claiming that my view is not backed by science is not quite correct. I simply see things differently because I chose not to follow any formal mainstream thinking as I feel more comfortable using free mind. I'm an introvert too, duh, and I consider myself as a good observer of human behavior.

Human mind is quite complex, there are underlying genetic predisposition, environmental factors, chemical or hormonal influence and so forth, thus dividing people into two groups based on external stimulus does not really capture what is truly going on in human mind. There could be for example lots of internal stimuli too, say sort of triggers based on past emotional traumas.

Said differently, based on past experience with emotionally unpleasant situation (such as unpleasant group experience where the person might have been humiliated or somehow hurt in the past), brain can use defense mechanisms to avoid further emotional pain, thus subconsciously avoid any similar situations in the future. The person can then be easily perceived as introvert because he doesn't participate or doesn't feel comfortable in group situations while he prefers to stay alone and reads books. The word introvert in this situation would correctly label that person, because he behaves in such way that it fits the definition, but it doesn't really give us any clue about what is really going on under the hood of his brain... That's only one factor, out of many...

Anyway, no harm, really good topic.

Similarly as described above, say a person is gifted, with high(er) IQ than his peers. While his peers are learning basic sentences and numbers he can already do advanced math and fluently talk to adults. How many common things can he have with his peers? Is he going to play with the same toys, using the same words like they do? Probably not that many, it is also possible that he will naturally start avoiding his peers as he doesn't find any satisfactory stimuli. This can easily become a habit, and by the time he is adult he simply doesn't fit into most groups, thus he might be easily labeled as introvert...

The same child though, placed to environment with other gifted children might have been influenced quite differently, he might have been feeling much more comfortable with his peers as he would get different feedback, thus could have easily focused on more group activities/social life. He would be labeled as an extrovert then, but again, there are many other factors to be considered as well...

As far as my personal observation is, I noticed that I tent to behave differently in different groups. In more stressful environment with more critical and high(er) motivated/goal oriented people, I rather feel more introverted. I just can't open up easily as there is a need to keep some boundaries, some distance, some barriers up. On the other hand, being in a group of rather average motivated people, I could easily become quite an extrovert, at the opposite site of the spectrum... Is it only me? I don't have any data to support my claim but I simply don't believe so; I believe that people can change in different environment, they can accept different believes, they can learn different mind set, they can adapt different behaviors....

After all, we are just people, just simple guys who are trying to get laid with pretty girls - regardless the labels we chose to accept in our minds as important...

 

[Big Daddy]

Being upfront so you guys have context when reading this post: I'm slightly more introverted than the average of the spectrum, though I definitively have some traits of extroverted people; I stay in a low energy mood the vast majority of the time and I love it. I'd prefer staying home alone watching movies 3 out of 4 weekends. Still, I feel the need to go out that remaining weekend and when I'm hyped up, I talk loud, laugh hard, create a scene and shit like that.

The thing is, I don't like partying/drinking/smoking for reasons other than "introverted/extroverted" and I think this may play a role for some here. I think I don't like because I was conditioned my entire life to be like that.

All the way up to middle school, I studied in a very "safe" school that basically conditioned me to be a loser. Then went to a different school in high school where people were hooking up and throwing parties and shit and I always felt like an outsider.

I'd attend a few of the parties (the ones I got invited to) and just stood there with my also loser group of friends and did nothing as people drank, smoked and fucked girls. I looked up to being cool and comfortable like all those popular guys there. I felt like I was missing all kinds of fun because I was a loser.

So nowadays I drink and party a little bit, but I don't like it. I feel like partying sometimes, I want to attend crazy EDM festivals because it sounds like it's going to be lots of fun (plus, I like EDM)... but I always feel like I'm not able to part of it when I get there. Getting wasted, playing drinking games like Stifler from American Pie, genuinely feeling like I'm having fun like those guys.

I love (some kinds of) stimuli; I love speed, so being in a car and going faster than the highway/avenue speed limit with drunk motherfuckers by my side gets me all pumped up. Knowing that I'm doing something illegal, the possibility of dying in a crash, the adrenaline... I love it. I'm hoping to have opportunities to skydive in the future. I don't even feel like there's fatal risk... I just have eyes for the fun that this shit must be.

I just don't like party stimuli because I feel like I can't fully donate my soul to the moment and have fun like a normal person. Maybe if I could, things would be different; for now, I'd pick that movie with a girlfriend as opposed to going to a crazy party with drunk naked chicks 3 nights out of 4.

 

[pks391]

I have never smoked or drank any alcohol my whole life. I am 23. My closest friends whom I have a very good time with drink regularly, smoke cigarettes and pot everyday and do drugs occasionally like MDMA. They never made me have any of that and i never felt like a stranger around them. Dont't worry too much, if people enjoy your company/character/personality, i.e. your uniqueness. It wont matter what you do and dont do. Atleast thats what I've experienced.

 

[Ree]

Hey what’s up guys? I’ve wondered about this topic and have wondered about it for a while.


Maybe this is one of the things that separates guys that do exclusively daygame/online from guys who mix in night game too (besides the type of girls you get)? Hmmm…

i feel u bruh...been wondering the same thing.....
i think nightgame is expensive,timewasting potentially dangerous and not to mention u are forced to interact with the dregs of society,cockblocking freinds,tools and drunk rowdy angry violent men

been seriously thinking of just doing daygame exclusively

i wonder wether the people who nighgame love partying,or they go to this venue despite their aversions to it

 

[Prehistoric]

If you grew up in a healthy environment with good food and good habits it's very difficult to transform yourself into somebody who smokes and drinks the whole time.

I have been partying like crazy in the last months (left my previous job and doing a distance learning master so I have a flexible schedule), drinking, smoking and improving a lot my night game (which is far better than my day game) but in the last weeks something inside of me is rejecting all those beers and cigarettes.

The last two times I went clubbing I couldn't drink more than 1 beer and was ordering water at the bar (which in club environments might make you look a bit like a "loser") and I was smoking only as an excuse to bring girls away from the dance floor into the smoking room where I could isolate them and build rapport.

I want to learn to let go myself entirely and being in party mood without having to drink, so I can do night game without damaging my health.

I am not that much into judging people (and women) who club a lot, like I often read on pick-up websites, books, forums etc. I don't agree with the idea that people doing this kind of stuff are somehow "lower" than those who are more reserved and prefer quieter social venues. There's nothing wrong with wanting to party hard. Moreover running your game in clubs gives you that "primitive feeling", as if you were a caveman striving for survival and dominance in the jungle. When you do succeed, you have a triumphal feeling of somebody who not only managed to bed the girl, but to do that when she's more defensive than in any other venue, to destroy immediate male competition and various other obstacles (cockblockers etc..)

Like somebody doing extreme sports, are they "lower" than people playing golf? No, just different people taking pleasure in different things.

By the way, I am working to improve my day game, but I don't see any reason why I should abandon night game.