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Don't have the impulse to be a boyfriend or lover

mella

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
May 7, 2022
Messages
32
Good news. I am starting to meet women now who actually enjoy my redneck voice and made it very clear that they do.

Plus, I am now Louie'd up. Yes, I am wearing a bunch of L.V. stuff now, so for the people who see me in the streets there will be no doubt that I am a badass, from now on.

The problem I have now is different.

The way I feel now: It's not that I don't know what a man is supposed to do with a woman, it's that I have no impulse to do anything sexual or lover-like with a woman. I don't possess the impulse to take her places, give her instructions, lead her, fuck her, etc.

The question is how do I generate this impulse?

The second question is - is that even necessary?

Perhaps I don't need this impulse in my life.

Right now I feel as though I don't even desire passionately to have a woman so what am I even doing on this site?
Objectively speaking, I believe it would be good to have a woman. But if I don't feel the impulse to lead her, which in turn means I can't move the interaction along normally. I'd have to force it, and it would obviously come out fucked up and make me feel very awkward inside.

The only thing I feel like doing with a woman is having platonic, intellectual conversations. I don't feel the impulse to be a boyfriend or a lover (living sex toy). I want to know, have any of you guys ever felt like this?
 

phuasjn2

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jun 5, 2022
Messages
86
I ever felt that way too. It was after a long period of not interacting with many women and focusing on my studies and working. My friend who was working also felt the same way. He is 35 and single and spends most of his time working, doesn't really have much going on in terms of getting girls. I suspect its because we don't talk to a lot of women in our daily lives so we don't feel the impulse to lead girls and be a good lover.

As I go out consistently everyday, I feel more and more of the impulse to get girls. I wouldn't say that I'm girl crazy but its as close as where you want to get. Now I sarge about every single off day I can if I'm not going on a date. I feel thats its highly beneficial to build a routine if you want to generate such a desire.
 

Beck Bass

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Mar 9, 2020
Messages
638
Yeah, it depends, technically there's nothing wrong with being a monk, living your life happily away from women, I think it's just that most guys will want women, because they see them around and they feel they want a man and they can have some fun together.

There's also nothing wrong with being platonic with a girl, if you really don't wanna bone her, that's how it should be, I guess (I still hit on girls that I don't quite wanna fuck because I think they like the ego boost, to feel desired, I also like flirting in general). Just be aware that some of this women might end up desiring something sexual with you, and maybe can become a bit disappointed when nothing happens.

As far as leading goes, it depends on the girl, some girls are easier to lead, and this also depends on you, how attracted to you they are, if you're their type and whatnot. Maybe you will find a girl you get along with just fine and adds something to your life. Until you do, if you really are not looking for it, then I guess it would be weird to try to force it, though I would say sometimes just getting a taste of a what a girl has to offer can make you hungry for more girls.
 
the right date makes getting her back home a piece of cake

Skills

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Nov 11, 2019
Messages
5,075
Good news. I am starting to meet women now who actually enjoy my redneck voice and made it very clear that they do.

Plus, I am now Louie'd up. Yes, I am wearing a bunch of L.V. stuff now, so for the people who see me in the streets there will be no doubt that I am a badass, from now on.

The problem I have now is different.

The way I feel now: It's not that I don't know what a man is supposed to do with a woman, it's that I have no impulse to do anything sexual or lover-like with a woman. I don't possess the impulse to take her places, give her instructions, lead her, fuck her, etc.

The question is how do I generate this impulse?

The second question is - is that even necessary?

Perhaps I don't need this impulse in my life.

Right now I feel as though I don't even desire passionately to have a woman so what am I even doing on this site?
Objectively speaking, I believe it would be good to have a woman. But if I don't feel the impulse to lead her, which in turn means I can't move the interaction along normally. I'd have to force it, and it would obviously come out fucked up and make me feel very awkward inside.

The only thing I feel like doing with a woman is having platonic, intellectual conversations. I don't feel the impulse to be a boyfriend or a lover (living sex toy). I want to know, have any of you guys ever felt like this?
Do what you want, if that is your goal do this.... i would also as insurance test your testosterone levels...
 

mella

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
May 7, 2022
Messages
32
Yeah, it depends, technically there's nothing wrong with being a monk, living your life happily away from women, I think it's just that most guys will want women, because they see them around and they feel they want a man and they can have some fun together.

There's also nothing wrong with being platonic with a girl, if you really don't wanna bone her, that's how it should be, I guess (I still hit on girls that I don't quite wanna fuck because I think they like the ego boost, to feel desired, I also like flirting in general). Just be aware that some of this women might end up desiring something sexual with you, and maybe can become a bit disappointed when nothing happens.

As far as leading goes, it depends on the girl, some girls are easier to lead, and this also depends on you, how attracted to you they are, if you're their type and whatnot. Maybe you will find a girl you get along with just fine and adds something to your life. Until you do, if you really are not looking for it, then I guess it would be weird to try to force it, though I would say sometimes just getting a taste of a what a girl has to offer can make you hungry for more girls.
Thanks, that makes sense. Especially the last sentence. Which is ironic because I have more good news.

I recently met a young lady who refreshed me so much that I really do feel like leading her. That's what I was born to do, at the end of the day. I feel much better and different now. I think it's just like phusajn said, I haven't been around women for a long time and that's why at the time of writing that post I felt so unmotivated. I just wasn't aware of what women have to offer me. It's amazing actually what they have to offer. They're beautiful and I learned that actually just yesterday. It's crazy to me because it's a whole new way of looking at things, but it's true. I walked away feeling like this woman breathed life into me. She was a real gem and angel, she's one of those super-friendly girls...just what I need. It was just one rather brief interaction but I am going to go talk to her again and this time ask her out. She already hit on me so I know it'll be a for sure thing.

Man, I just didn't know what life had in store for me, being away and living indeed like a monk for such a long time. I now know what kind of wonderful things await me. This week for the first time I wore some clothes that made me feel like a real VIP. This is all a good sign, I think it will be all uphill from here.

So it won't be a smooth transition though. I have no experience in leading women so I may be liable to make innocent mistakes here and there, but that's no big thing. I must remember that as a man I have to be as strong as a rock, that's what she needs out of me. I will continue on, keep climbing, keep walking in a straight line and I won't let anything knock me off. Great...
 

Beck Bass

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Mar 9, 2020
Messages
638
Thanks, that makes sense. Especially the last sentence. Which is ironic because I have more good news.

I recently met a young lady who refreshed me so much that I really do feel like leading her...

So it won't be a smooth transition though. I have no experience in leading women so I may be liable to make innocent mistakes here and there, but that's no big thing. I must remember that as a man I have to be as strong as a rock, that's what she needs out of me. I will continue on, keep climbing, keep walking in a straight line and I won't let anything knock me off. Great...
Great news, just keep on moving and having fun with her!
Just don't get too attached to the idea of being with her or having her, live in the moment and do your best, hopefully the best comes out of it. There's always more beautiful women out there as well ;D
 

Regal Tiger

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Mar 16, 2015
Messages
1,032
Got on here to say something similar to @phuasjn2 and it seems that was the case for you

I think that if you're not around women for a long time then you just naturally lose that desire

I've also noticed that and the inverse within myself. I'm never hornier than when I'm out and about and see women walking around or when I start interacting with them again after a break
 
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