First time going out for day game

[Darius]

Hello everyone,

I've recently gotten a bit disappointed with the number and quality of women that I am meeting through social circle and tinder. And, there are a number of things that I want to iron out when it comes to my vibe, which I think will require a lot of trial and error to get right. So, I have decided to give day game a try.

Today was the first time I went out specifically to interact with women. It's been a daunting experience.

I generally know how to talk with women once I meet them, and how to escalate the vibe, etc. But today it really felt like I was chasing, hard, so I couldn't do any proper approaches.

I did have a chat with a cute cashier in a supermarket, she had gorgeous eyes and I told her that. She smiled and asked me where I had gotten an item from, and she said she wanted to get one too. I told her, and we had a very pleasant and quite flirty conversation for a bit. However, that was just muscle memory kicking in, I was pretty much frozen internally. I didn't have it in me to ask her out, so I just left when another customer came in line.

Here's the problem: I got really anxious. The whole time I was out, it felt like I was just wandering aimlessly, without a real purpose, waiting to see some random woman that *maybe* would be kind enough to save me from being by myself. I kind of felt lost, and really lonely, just drifting.

I'm generally a really busy man, I have tons of things going on, and when I'm free I like to hang out with friends or do useful stuff. I really dislike not spending my time on a clearly defined purpose. Heck even when I go out on dates I always take my laptop or a book with me in case of flakes so I know that no matter what I won't be sitting around doing nothing. And, more importantly, so I'm not relying on the girl to have a good time.

Has anyone been through anything similar when they started? And how did you overcome that feeling? Any tips appreciated.

Darius

 

[ulrich]

Hi Darius. Yes, your first days day gaming are like that.
Don’t get discouraged, you’re doing something very natural that you have been heavily conditioned to think it’s not.
Keep going.

When I stop doing daygame and need to get back, I usually set a hard rule for myself: “Today, I will talk to at least 4 girls I am attracted to”.
If I haven’t fulfilled my quota, I can’t go home.
Sometimes I end up walking aimlessly like you said and so pissed off that I force myself to talk with girls just so I can call it a day.

It usually takes me a couple of days to break the limiting belief and gain some momentum.
By day 3 or 4, I am a machine.
And by day 5 or 6, I have three or four dates scheduled and inevitably stop day gaming for a while.


Have you tried the newbie assignment?

 

[Starboy]

Hello everyone,

I've recently gotten a bit disappointed with the number and quality of women that I am meeting through social circle and tinder. And, there are a number of things that I want to iron out when it comes to my vibe, which I think will require a lot of trial and error to get right. So, I have decided to give day game a try.

Today was the first time I went out specifically to interact with women. It's been a daunting experience.

I generally know how to talk with women once I meet them, and how to escalate the vibe, etc. But today it really felt like I was chasing, hard, so I couldn't do any proper approaches.

I did have a chat with a cute cashier in a supermarket, she had gorgeous eyes and I told her that. She smiled and asked me where I had gotten an item from, and she said she wanted to get one too. I told her, and we had a very pleasant and quite flirty conversation for a bit. However, that was just muscle memory kicking in, I was pretty much frozen internally. I didn't have it in me to ask her out, so I just left when another customer came in line.

Here's the problem: I got really anxious. The whole time I was out, it felt like I was just wandering aimlessly, without a real purpose, waiting to see some random woman that *maybe* would be kind enough to save me from being by myself. I kind of felt lost, and really lonely, just drifting.

I'm generally a really busy man, I have tons of things going on, and when I'm free I like to hang out with friends or do useful stuff. I really dislike not spending my time on a clearly defined purpose. Heck even when I go out on dates I always take my laptop or a book with me in case of flakes so I know that no matter what I won't be sitting around doing nothing. And, more importantly, so I'm not relying on the girl to have a good time.

Has anyone been through anything similar when they started? And how did you overcome that feeling? Any tips appreciated.

Darius

Yeah way long ago I felt this way too. A long time ago when I didn't really take this seriously. I thought what's the point/purpose of me walking around looking for women to talk to. This isn't a normal thing. Your brain finds it strange that you're walking around solely with the intention of talking to women who are strangers. That's why you're experiencing this sort of internal resistance.

The purpose in a nutshell is to keep meeting enough women, talk to them and find the friendly ones you find attractive who will engage with you and get their contact information down. Ideally you meet a girl and you instadate her and grab some food or a coffee from starbucks,dunkin donuts and then sit down somewhere where you just talk and connect. But since that might be nerve wracking for you atm just go for number closing for the time being until you feel like you can push your boundaries and try more.

I would go by these rules to start in daygame

Day Game Tour with Tony Depp, Pt.4: The Three Rules

To become a successful day-gamer, you need a good work ethic. Abiding by these three rules will focus your efforts and put you on the path to glory. In part three of this series, I covered verbal game, experiential learning, conquering fear, the two-minute rule, and exposure therapy. See the...

www.girlschase.com

If she doesn't tell you she has a bf or isn't just bombarding you with negative signals always close. If she's about to walk away or say she has to go just say wait in a relaxed casual manner and you'll have a few moments to close her. Just say "hey before you go let's grab food or a drink sometime".

These days if I walk around to talk to girls or if I approach a girl unexpectedly I know why i'm doing it and the purpose behind it. The next step for me is better execution and building strong impressions.

 

[DarkKnight]

Hey bro.. You need to have some auto- reactions which are practiced so you can shoot from the hip. Right now I can improvise and have become very very smooth, but long time ago I too froze up due to no auto- reactions. For instance when the cassiere and you were flirting.. If you had a default line to CLOSE her.. you would be closer to closing. It really helps. Also build new muscle memory. Visualization has really helped me. I use a visionboard with all kinds of seduction knowledge and pictures of hot babes. I look at that first for fast useful reminders and then I visualize being a super pua.

 

[Orgasmatron]

Hey dude,

I'm in the same boat at the moment.

I'm just wandering the streets aimlessly looking for girls to talk to.

I've found some places where people hang out and chill for a while, park areas near busy city spots, places with benches etc.

Could be an idea to set up camp for a short while somewhere like that for half an hour, get a coffee and see who pops by.

Time of day probably a factor too.

eg. chicks on lunchbreak at work, or on way home from work - where would they go for that near you? might have a bit of time to chat then too

 

[Darius]

thank you all for the advice, I'm glad to see that I'm not the only one that's been through the same thing. Man, you guys are right, sometimes the brain really is freaking out over meaningless stuff like talking to girls.

I went out again today and it felt a lot less weird than yesterday, I think I'm slowly starting to get used to it. Still no talking with any women on the street, but I started conversations with 3-4 girls that were around throughout my day - a pharmacist, a cashier and a girl at the gym. Small steps but hey, better than nothing.

Another thing I'm struggling with is this: I really feel like I have zero social momentum. Normally in NG situations I always have friends around that I can get my energy up with, and from there I can jump to different groups or girls in the same venue / other venues close by. When I'm out and about just by myself it feels really lonely. My brain still thinks I should be surrounded by friends when socializing, not by myself.

Is that something that goes away with time as well? Or are there any tips / tricks to make it go away faster?

Visualization has really helped me. I use a visionboard with all kinds of seduction knowledge and pictures of hot babes

I use this too! But I always visualised myself in a party grabbing the attention of all the women, or in a group setting where I'm banging 4-5 of the girls in secret and nobody knows lol (made some progress on that one, at one point I was hitting 2 girls in a big group at the same time, their subtle looks when we went out were golden). I got to the point where my group and night game was in good shape, and I could do both of those things kind of consistently.

I'll try to imagine a hot scenario in day game - I guess where I talk with some girl and bring her home the same day. It just sucks cuz I never saw this in action, I never came across any guy that did daygame before, ever.

 

[ulrich]

I'll try to imagine a hot scenario in day game - I guess where I talk with some girl and bring her home the same day. It just sucks cuz I never saw this in action, I never came across any guy that did daygame before, ever.

Check this guy’s channel.
He has great daygame in field footage.

 

[Darius]

Check this guy’s channel.
He has great daygame in field footage.

this is amazing, just what I needed. He even included failures with other girls too at the beginning, goes to show how little they matter. great stuff

 

[Orgasmatron]

I went out again today and it felt a lot less weird than yesterday, I think I'm slowly starting to get used to it. Still no talking with any women on the street, but I started conversations with 3-4 girls that were around throughout my day - a pharmacist, a cashier and a girl at the gym. Small steps but hey, better than nothing.

I found this helped too.

A while ago I decided that if I go to a shop, I'll find the hottest looking sales assistant and go ask her to help me find the thing I'm looking to buy, or wait in the queue to get served by the hottest girl at the cash register. I can find it myself obviously, but this is more fun. And I'd ask her if it was busy today, what's it like working here, have you got long left til you get finished, stuff like that. Those girls are so bored and people just ignore them all day, so if you actually ask them some stuff about themselves, they are usually pretty happy to chat and will tell you loads of stuff. It can lead to all kinds of conversations.

It's good for practicing talking to nice girls.

I do it without even thinking now.

Made some jokes this evening to cute girl in the shop, made her laugh. It was much better than using the self-serve checkout.

Also good for getting some momentum going if you are out shopping then daygaming. Speak to some shop girls, then you're in a good mood to speak to some non-shop girls.