Quick backstory:
Met this girl a couple of times at various friend's parties over a few years. Had a few laughs and flirts, I tease, she laughs. But she was with her boyfriend at the time, so nothing came of it. But there was something totally intriguing about this girl. That feeling of being in sync with someone. Anyway, forward nearly a year and a few other relationships, she suddenly drops me a message on facebook one night, out of the blue. I'm a bit hesitant to reply at first, I have no idea where this is coming from. Is this a joke? Did I piss off someone? But I soon let my guard down a bit and we chat for hours. She apparently also noted that we really clicked the few times we met before, and wanted to find out who this "mystery man" actually is. (Whey I'm a mystery man!)
So the next night, I figure why not go for a ride. We take out my brand new loaner Volvo V40 for a test drive (good car btw, if rather dull) and end up at my place for a movie. I'm trying to figure out if moving quickly will turn this into a one-night stand, which I wanted to avoid with this girl... but we ended up having sex anyway. Good, fun sex even. Haven't had good fun sex for ages! :dances:
I left for a week long trip the next day, which involved a lot of WhatsApp chatter with her and we pretty much kept in close contact. Got back to have a rather steamy night together. I feel we're having lots of fun together, but I do note a small bit of hesitation on her part. I figure she's a bit apprehensive about moving so fast as well, so I plan to see her the following night and just hang around and take it easy, get to know her a bit more.
But that never happens, she has some sort of relationship emergency and cancels that evening. And here's the kicker - after seeing her for a total of two times, she hopped on a plane to America for her 4 month student exchange.
Sooo my problem is as follows - now she's nowhere to be heard, flaky as fuck, doesn't initiate communication and doesn't want to Skype. Sure, they have a crap wifi and she hates Skype and blah-dy blah-dy blah. I'd let her be, but we had so much fun that I'm really having trouble just shutting everything down. I'm getting in that chasing mood again and I hate it. It's frustrating as hell when you have no real communication or know what's happening. I turn into this energy-sucking neurotic fool and I hate it.
I ended up asking her what's up and does she want to keep in touch. She said, to no surprise, that she was feeling a bit of stress about all of this. After all, her longtime relationship with her boyfriend had ended but 8 months ago, and now she was throwing herself into these new relationships on a whim. And yeah, I'm not exactly sure how many new relationships she's thrown herself into. =) She doesn't seem like the type to go on a sexual rampage, and yet she had no trouble sleeping with me on the first date.
But she honestly sounded like she's into me. So the interest is there. For now.
I'm completely baffled here though. I mean, I feel like I should stop chasing and give her some room to figure out her thoughts about stuff. But should I just force myself to shut up and totally shut her down? Send her a message every few weeks and try to contact her when she gets back from wherever?
Is there any sensible way for me to try and uphold an attraction here?
TLDR hilights:
-OP is smitten
-Girl escapes country after hookup
-Is long-distance always doomed to fail
Thanks for any replies, guys. =D
Met this girl a couple of times at various friend's parties over a few years. Had a few laughs and flirts, I tease, she laughs. But she was with her boyfriend at the time, so nothing came of it. But there was something totally intriguing about this girl. That feeling of being in sync with someone. Anyway, forward nearly a year and a few other relationships, she suddenly drops me a message on facebook one night, out of the blue. I'm a bit hesitant to reply at first, I have no idea where this is coming from. Is this a joke? Did I piss off someone? But I soon let my guard down a bit and we chat for hours. She apparently also noted that we really clicked the few times we met before, and wanted to find out who this "mystery man" actually is. (Whey I'm a mystery man!)
So the next night, I figure why not go for a ride. We take out my brand new loaner Volvo V40 for a test drive (good car btw, if rather dull) and end up at my place for a movie. I'm trying to figure out if moving quickly will turn this into a one-night stand, which I wanted to avoid with this girl... but we ended up having sex anyway. Good, fun sex even. Haven't had good fun sex for ages! :dances:
I left for a week long trip the next day, which involved a lot of WhatsApp chatter with her and we pretty much kept in close contact. Got back to have a rather steamy night together. I feel we're having lots of fun together, but I do note a small bit of hesitation on her part. I figure she's a bit apprehensive about moving so fast as well, so I plan to see her the following night and just hang around and take it easy, get to know her a bit more.
But that never happens, she has some sort of relationship emergency and cancels that evening. And here's the kicker - after seeing her for a total of two times, she hopped on a plane to America for her 4 month student exchange.
Sooo my problem is as follows - now she's nowhere to be heard, flaky as fuck, doesn't initiate communication and doesn't want to Skype. Sure, they have a crap wifi and she hates Skype and blah-dy blah-dy blah. I'd let her be, but we had so much fun that I'm really having trouble just shutting everything down. I'm getting in that chasing mood again and I hate it. It's frustrating as hell when you have no real communication or know what's happening. I turn into this energy-sucking neurotic fool and I hate it.
I ended up asking her what's up and does she want to keep in touch. She said, to no surprise, that she was feeling a bit of stress about all of this. After all, her longtime relationship with her boyfriend had ended but 8 months ago, and now she was throwing herself into these new relationships on a whim. And yeah, I'm not exactly sure how many new relationships she's thrown herself into. =) She doesn't seem like the type to go on a sexual rampage, and yet she had no trouble sleeping with me on the first date.
But she honestly sounded like she's into me. So the interest is there. For now.I'm completely baffled here though. I mean, I feel like I should stop chasing and give her some room to figure out her thoughts about stuff. But should I just force myself to shut up and totally shut her down? Send her a message every few weeks and try to contact her when she gets back from wherever?
Is there any sensible way for me to try and uphold an attraction here?
TLDR hilights:
-OP is smitten
-Girl escapes country after hookup
-Is long-distance always doomed to fail
Thanks for any replies, guys. =D
