Fox's Journal

[ray_zorse]

Nail that n00b assignment bro. Fuck yeah. Burn it down

I can help you with the voice issues. They were a huge sticking point for me. But in about 3-4mths work I learned a lot and so can you. A deep resonant voice is pretty easy if you know what to do, problem is not even my voice teacher was able to explain that to me satisfactorily. I'm willing to try though.

cheers, Ray

 

[ray_zorse]

OK dude well here is an exercise for you.

Take the biggest breath you can and say a sentence like "Four score and seven years ago...etc".

I bet you breathed in by puffing out your chest right?

This doesn't give you much air. And a deep resonant voice requires a lot of air. (Think of a guitar string, a tiny pluck is audible on the high strings but not the low strings, you have to hit the low strings hard to get the same apparent noise level).

So if you are breathing from your chest you will naturally speak in a higher voice to conserve air.

We can talk about voice tone later. For now, the breathing.

The way to take in a proper quantity of air is to make your stomach jut out while holding your chest still.

I just took a quick video for you and put it on youtube to demonstrate. Practice doing exactly what is in the video. And don't worry, it is harder than it looks so you won't be able to do it as smoothly as I do, at least not straightaway. Just stick at it.

Diaphragm breathing: http://youtu.be/bAo_0MkXoGk

cheers, Ray

 

[Oskar]

Welcome back Fox,

Hope to read about some more of your escapades soon!

 

[ray_zorse]

Cool bro. As to Ashley I wouldn't pull the "study buddy" move, be more direct, how about just "hey Ashley be great to grab a bite to eat together some time soon" or similar?

As to the "I know it's weird I wasn't just waiting for you" line she's chase framed herself you just have to cement it "that's okay I have that effect on women (smile, change the subject)".

-Ray

 

[ray_zorse]

Good report. My situation is somewhat similar to yours.

You mentioned a time conflict between cold approaching and managing your existing relationships. However, I would look at this as an advantage rather than a disadvantage. Here's why. When you're single and horny, you can't help but approach women from something of a value-taking perspective. It's hard to have a true abundance mentality in that situation (if you're getting laid several times a week through cold approach or online dating then that might be different, but let's assume that isn't the case). Whereas, if you're getting laid regularly with your gf, then you're approaching women from more of a value-giving mindset, or at the very least an outcome-independent mindset. This can be a little bit bad in some ways (you don't commit as fully to the interactions), but is a very useful exercise.

The other thing to look at if you're concerned about a time conflict is this:
http://www.sashapua.com/how-to-defeat-approach-anxiety-forever/
I recommend this article to someone every week (most recently Smith, due to a problem he described in his journal), because it is awesome. Once you master the suggestions in this article you'll basically just integrate approaching into your daily routine. The only reason you're not already doing that is because of AA.

Mind you, I'm not sure what would happen if you tried to put Sasha's recommendations into action without first being comfortable with cold approaching. I think it would probably work, but it wouldn't hurt to set aside some time specifically to cold approach in the beginning, because it will be easier to build momentum and to keep yourself accountable (you set a target that you'll do 10 approaches before going home... I rarely do anything like this anymore, but it was helpful)

Ray