Girlfriend broke up with me - auto-rejection

[Anonymous]

Hi
Well, don't really know where to start, but I'll just jump in to it.

Me and this girl had a good relationship, we were happy with eachother and everything. But the last 2 months in the relationship I kinda stopped seeing her that much, like we just met once a week +/-
So around christmas she was at my place and started crying "for no reason", and I asked why shy cried. She said it was since we was almost never with eachother and I didn't show any feelings for her.
Some days later she came to my place again, we had sex and slept together. Two days later she sendt a text to me "We need to talk", and everyone know what that means..

After that I started to text message her all the time and asking what was wrong and that I didn't want to lose her.
She replied that we could just wait and see what happend, my response was "Well, then I'm going to lose you for sure". She replied "No, don't say that".
So the short story: I started chasing her (I know, I'm an idiot..) So about a week after she said we needed to talk and , she broke up with me over facebook.
I kinda feel now that I pushed her to brake up with me now.. So I was thinking I should give her some time and wait.

After 2 weeks she messaged me on facebook and we started talking about how it was going and some more crap(nothing about the relationship or brakeup).
I asked her if we could meet and eat some food or something, and we scheduled a meeting some days later. And when the day came and I texted "I'm going out the door now, will be there soon"
And she replied "afff, I don't want to go, I'm to tired after work". Me: "Ahh.. okey"

So I'm clueless.. she seemed like she wanted me and would try to fix things until i started chasing her, after the brakeup she's just been cold.. Should I wait and try to schedule a meeting next week or is she lost?
Haven't seen her since we had sex and thats about 3-4 weeks ago, I'm thinking she's just scared of meeting me again..

 

[Garrett]

Hi
Well, don't really know where to start, but I'll just jump in to it.

Me and this girl had a good relationship, we were happy with eachother and everything. But the last 2 months in the relationship I kinda stopped seeing her that much, like we just met once a week +/-

When you set relationship expectations early on, like if you see her often and then stop seeing her, then yeah, she'll be upset. What you should do next time is get into the relationship and see the girl once every 8-10 days and if you like her and she tells you she needs you to commit more time to her and you want that, then you can gradually spend more time with her. Chase posted a good article about this, basically saying that if you're the type of guy to take the girl out to the beach, fancy restaurants, fun/expensive outings, then when the money dries up you stop doing that, then you're screwed because she won't be happy. On the contrary, if you don't give her those things in the beginning, and gradually start giving them to her more, she'll be happier .

So around christmas she was at my place and started crying "for no reason", and I asked why shy cried. She said it was since we was almost never with eachother and I didn't show any feelings for her.

^^ Legit concern on her part, had you have not rushed into the relationship and seen her frequently in the beginning, she wouldn't of done this.

Some days later she came to my place again, we had sex and slept together. Two days later she sendt a text to me "We need to talk", and everyone know what that means..

After that I started to text message her all the time and asking what was wrong and that I didn't want to lose her.

You probably know this now, but yeah that is wrong because your scarcity mentality shot through the roof, and she started losing interest because of you chasing her.

She replied that we could just wait and see what happend, my response was "Well, then I'm going to lose you for sure".

Chasing and going on her terms is a big Nono. This made you look super weak/undesirable to her. Don't worry though man I've done things like this before too , just learn from it and try your best not to do it again.

She replied "No, don't say that".
So the short story: I started chasing her (I know, I'm an idiot..) So about a week after she said we needed to talk and , she broke up with me over facebook.
I kinda feel now that I pushed her to brake up with me now.. So I was thinking I should give her some time and wait.

Hmm... you didn't screw up THAT bad but it was enough for her to lose some attraction for you. If I were you I'd cut her off for about a month, and when she texts you, respond warmly or don't even respond sometimes to add to your unpredictability. Spezzatura will help, just stop talking to her for a month and then what you can do is make a comeback. For the next month, you could try to spend some time everyday working on your walk, talk, posture, work out etc. and then be that sexy guy who will take her to bed next time you see her. You've had sex with her so if you want her back, the good news is that it shouldn't be too hard! Just keep in mind what I said or else it won't work. Also, try to see other girls asap in order to make the more optimal of comebacks .

After 2 weeks she messaged me on facebook and we started talking about how it was going and some more crap(nothing about the relationship or brakeup).
I asked her if we could meet and eat some food or something, and we scheduled a meeting some days later. And when the day came and I texted "I'm going out the door now, will be there soon"
And she replied "afff, I don't want to go, I'm to tired after work". Me: "Ahh.. okey"

^^ Flaked, there was too much pressure on her and she probably got nervous and backed out. She is still into you because if she wasn't, she wouldn't respond to you, nor would she agree to meeting up with you.

So I'm clueless.. she seemed like she wanted me and would try to fix things until i started chasing her, after the brakeup she's just been cold.. Should I wait and try to schedule a meeting next week or is she lost?
Haven't seen her since we had sex and thats about 3-4 weeks ago, I'm thinking she's just scared of meeting me again..

^ Ok so you've waited a while, you could probably get her out within the next week then. Just be very mindful of what I've mentioned above or else you risk losing her for good bro! Even if you lose her, its probably better for you anyway, because you can work on your game and get out there and pick up sexy 10's

Goodluck,
Garrett

 

[Anonymous]

Thanks man, I know all this stuff now tho, found chase's site two days after it was over..(3 weeks ago) so everything you've said about sexiness etc I already knew

"When you set relationship expectations early on, like if you see her often and then stop seeing her, then yeah, she'll be upset. What you should do next time is get into the relationship and see the girl once every 8-10 days and if you like her and she tells you she needs you to commit more time to her and you want that, then you can gradually spend more time with her. Chase posted a good article about this, basically saying that if you're the type of guy to take the girl out to the beach, fancy restaurants, fun/expensive outings, then when the money dries up you stop doing that, then you're screwed because she won't be happy. On the contrary, if you don't give her those things in the beginning, and gradually start giving them to her more, she'll be happier ."

I acctualy knew this in the start of the relationship, because I've screwd it up with another X I've had, so I was carefull to not be with her too much in the start of the relationship. I've never been the type of person to spoil girls with fancy restaurants and big gifts in the start of a relationship, so thats never been any problem. The thing is that even I think we spent too little time with eachother, so it was just bad handled by me.

So I've been working on my voice, walk, elite-eyecontact, how to be a sexy man, X-factor etc. the last couple of weeks and I've been working out for about half a year.
But it seems like I've got a lot of attention from girls now that I'm single again + found chase's site, so now I'm not really sure if I want to try and get her back or be single for a while and work on my game.. I'm actually meeting up with a good looking girl tomorrow, so I'll just see what happens

Thanks again,
IAJ