Great Example on Handling Objections and Persisting

[Mr.Rob]

One of the areas I think I struggle with (and probably a lot of us struggle with) is being persistent upon first meeting a girl and handling her objections to getting in conversation with you.

For example the busy girl, the girl with friends, the girl that makes a first impression of you out to be "under her league", girl just trying to brush you off, and more.

We've all been there and it can be a bit frustrating to deal with because you're thinking the whole time "damn if she'd just give me a second she would probably like me".

I have noticed that the times I plough through and blow past petty objections the girl will hook immediately from the shear dominance of frame control and her having to reevaluate you as a higher value hero rather than a low value shmuck as she did originally.

Of course a lot of times the girl is just genuinely busy and not in the mood to meet anyone new in which case nothing you do will really get you anywhere and that's okay too.

However we're probably missing a few opportunities that we could've had by giving up too soon or not handling objections/persisting in the right way.

Here is a conversation thread taken from the book "The Psychology of Sales" by Brian Tracy regarding and example on the exact subject:

Brian Tracy: Mr. Brown, my name is Brian Tracy. I'm with the institute for Executive Development. I was wondering if you would be interested in a proven method that could increase your sales by 20 to 30 percent over the next twelve months? (Strong opening line here to get prospects attention and break them out of autopilot)

Prospect: Of course. What is it?

BT: Mr. Brown we've developed a method to increase your sales by 20 percent, 30 percent, and even 50 percent over the next few months.

Prospect: Really? How do you do that?

BT: That is exactly why I am calling you. I just need ten minutes of your time to show you this system, and you can decide for yourself if it applies to your company and your salespeople.

Prospect: Thanks for calling but we're not really in the market right now

BT: (roll with the punches) That's alright. Most people in the financial services industry felt the same way when I first called on them. But now they've become our best customers, and they recommend us to their friends.

Prospect: Oh really? What is it then?

BT: That's exactly what I would like to talk to you about, and I just need about ten minutes of your time. You can decide for yourself if it's right for you.

Prospect: Well can you tell me a bit about it on the phone?

BT: (don't sell the product on the phone instead get the investment to meet up at a later time) Mr. Prospect, I'd love to tell you about it on the phone, but I have something I have to show you. You need to see it personally.

Prospect: hmmm

BT: (taking responsibility and leading) Would Tuesday morning be convenient for you? Or would sometime on Wednesday afternoon be better?

Prospect: Could you send me something in the mail? (putting up resistance)

BT: I would love to mail it to you, but you know how undependable the mail can be today. Why don't I drop it off to you personally on Tuesday afternoon when I'm in the area? Will you be available at that time?

Prospect: All right why don't you call me Monday and we can set up a specific time to get together next week? (trying to control the frame in his favor so he doesn't have to deal with a sales man)

BT: Mr. Prospect, I've got my calendar here in front of me. Do you have your schedule handy? (Completely derail the guys last frame and reframed things)

Prospect: Yeah give me a second

BT: Lets set up a specific time right now. If something comes up and this time doesn't work for you, you can give us a call and we can reschedule. Would Tuesday afternoon at around 3 oclock be convenient for you?"

Prospect: Yes that works I can do that. I'll have Sarah pencil you in

BT: Great my # is 999-9999. Thank you Mr. Prospect you are really going to like what I have to show you

Don't have time to further break this down and obviously some parts of this example are a little unrealistic but you get the gist of things.

Basically you dominante the frame and break past the key resistance points.

Obviously this is probably easier in seduction where you can make a witty comment and more light hearted in conversation while still dominating the frame.

Comment below any additional thoughts on this and any tips off the top of your head that you use to break past initial resistance to interact with you off the initial approach.

-Rob

 

[ray_zorse]

All I can really add to this is when she tells you to fuck off and you slink off with your tail between your legs it looks like compliance. So I generally just stay there doing or saying whatever I can think of other than that. Usually they can't actually make you go away, I have had them get up and move to a different table leaving me sitting there with my dick in my hand, but this is pretty rare and in any case counts as a victory of sorts, since you were obnoxious enough to affect their behaviour and get them to do something they wouldn't otherwise have done.

Ex

Me: hi there, I saw you when I came in and I wanted to meet you
Her: we're talking right now
Me: I'm Raymond (put my hand out to shake, she reluctantly does so)
Her: ...
Me: what's your name?
Her: blub blub blub (making some excuse I can't hear)
Me: that's a pretty long name
Her: ...
Me: so what made you move to this table, you were by the entrance before
Her: (doesn't give a reason... something like "we decided to move over")
Me: so what did you say your name was again?
Her: I didn't
Her: ...
Her: we're having a girls' night out, there are plenty of other people here to talk to
Me: (smiles) so go talk to them
Her: ... (nodding and smirking, throwing it back at me... fuckin bitch)
Me: haha, well (checks watch) I'm meeting my friend in 10 minutes, so you only have to entertain me until then
Her: we don't have to do anything (good call I thought, I just snuck that in to see if she would notice)
Her: ...
Her: blub blub blub (to the effect of fuck off)
Me: well I guess I'll just wait for my friend then
(I move one seat down and continue drinking my drink at their table, glancing at a tv screen from time to time) (eventually some dick arrives at the bar who I gather might be her bf and sits between us, I ignore them, and eventually get up and go, leaving my empty glass on their table)

Later in another part of the bar I'm sitting with my date when the two girls who were with her, come and sit at a neighbouring table. I greet them in a friendly manner that makes it clear I remember them. They reciprocate. I think they admired the fact I stuck to my frame and persisted, even though I wasn't successful in the end. IDGAF cos I know she was only being bitchy for sport and to impress her friends. Note I wrote this up as a rude blowout in my most recent journal entry, but didn't go into details.

Another pair a few months ago it started a bit like that and later I re approached and sat at their table and got this major freeze out, refusing eye contact and talking to each other as if I wasn't there and doing this exaggerated flirting with a bouncer in effort to further discomfort me, I just sat there wondering when they would crack and acknowledge me, but was saved by a moderately attractive woman who I'd picked up earlier and taken home for some partying and making out and brought back to the club, coming to tell me everyone's leaving, so I briefly discussed plans with her and we left without my acknowledging those bitches. Just as I was getting up, some other chick approached me to say hi, cos she noticed I was back since leaving earlier... and this did not go unnoticed by those bitches either. Saved by preselection!! Haha! Then I randomly ran into the bitchy girls a week later in a tram stop when I had my kids with me, they were much less bitchy and I had a nice convo with the shorter one, although she refused a number. IDGAF, just shows that girls can warm up given sufficient persistence.

Ray

 

[Mr.Rob]

Haha yeah sometimes you get the bitch that just doesn't want to open up. I empathize sometimes for these girls depending on my mood (they genuinely aren't open to meeting someone then) but if they get bitchy to look cool and feel superior I usually turn it into banter and a joke to show her I don't take her seriously.

I find if I do it right some of them will realize how ridiculous their behavior is and apologize and talk to you but a lot of times it just pisses them off that you aren't taking them seriously and complying to their demands like most guys.

Sounds like you pretty much did just that from reading your reply. Always more fun to deflect a punch than take it head on unguarded. I like you earned their respect in the long run. Who knows maybe you'll run into them again when they're more open to meeting people.

Yeah it's crazy how subjective womens emotions can be. There have been girls I've approached at the club that were initially cold but I reopened a bit later to find them glad that I came back over.

You never know why a girls emotional state is the way it is and a lot of times it isn't personal but her pet goldfish died or she just found out she wasn't pregnant or ridden with STD's and is happy.

 

[Grand Pooba]

Basically you dominante the frame and break past the key resistance points.

Obviously this is probably easier in seduction where you can make a witty comment and more light hearted in conversation while still dominating the frame.

Comment below any additional thoughts on this and any tips off the top of your head that you use to break past initial resistance to interact with you off the initial approach.

-Rob

Always be leading. Always. Anticipate the resistance ahead of time and lead them through it, comfortably, but not super aggressively (different from dominance).