FR gym pickup walkthrough/FAQ?

[stratvm]

ok so i realized the best is to forget about the "average jane"-storage places for finding quality girls therefore i turned to my favourite gym to get quality women.

there have been a few girls who fancied me so far and i liked them too but i wasnt bothered to do anything in the gym. so i started a new project using the legendary https://www.girlschase.com/content/gym-pickup-dos-donts-and-how-meet-girls-gym

GIRL 1

my favourite girl was so happy i said `bye` to her when she was leaving last week i was REALLY surprised. i mean for 9 months i did nothing and... whoaa. pinging makes me comfortable too, so i think this strategy works for me.

today she was about to leave again, passed next to me - i just looked left and noticed her so i touched her briefly. she noticed me earlier probably because she instantly knew it was me.

- i asked her something like `going home after a hard workout, huh?`
- she said yes, and asked my name and gave her hand for a handshake
- told her `stratvm` taking her hand and not shaking just holding while looking as sexy as i could in her eyes. the hand was very cold which i think by experience was rather nervousness than having them washed in ice cold water
- she didnt reply with her name so asked `and whats yours?` - replied smiled like somebody who won the lottery and left

*** now this was when i was comfortable with just this and think was a good second ping, however should i have asked her out? i mean there were tons of people around as i was waiting for sg in a line and didnt feel it would have been the right thing to do

as a next step i plan when we meet next weekend ( our working ours are different during the week) to tell something like:
- you know what i was thinking about >>>
- then lean in a sexy way in and whisper: i think we fancy each other >>>
- then slowly lean back and say in normal way: A LOT. (slow smile) so how about getting down for a few drinks to get to know each other better?

*** im pretty sure she digs me big time so i think it makes no sense to wait more with this. what do you think?

GIRL 2

she is an older gal (with fake tits & smoking hot body) and seems to be quite upset (or worse) that i didnt make a move ever - though now working out in my tron like suit (x-bionic FTW) she looked at me so i decided to do a sexy smile & `hello` combo. the reaction was way less enthusiastic than GIRL 1 but still smiled slowly and said something. then we continued working out.

i`ll be curious about her next time i ping `harder` but i think she was rather surprised than ignorant (i was surprised about myself to be honest but it seems the initial `success` with GIRL 1 gave some confidence in this gym pickup stuff

GIRL 3

she is new regular but i noticed her looking at me (quite obviously i might add) so i looked into her eyes and smiled slowly last time. now i said `hi` and she had a reaction which is the mixture of the previous 2 girls.

*** im thinking are girls surprised if somebody they saw before breaks the ice but NOT going in with an armoured battalion? (like most of the guys i see in the gym, they are launching full scale assaults all the time - without any results of course)

there is girl 4 who seems to be some nordic amazon (swedish-norwegian-icelandic-finnish i suppose) and girl 5 who is totally model like but half black which is not really popular in this side of the world but i dont care. havent done anything with them yet.

 

[stratvm]

GIRL 1 (G1)

a textbook fail - met her today, told her what i saw fit but it seems this train has long left as the conversation looked like this:

- hello G1 (walking next to her)
* notices me, friendly smile (omfg friendly smile............... i knew this was going to end bad)
- you know what i was thinking about?
- ???
- i think we fancy each other... (couldnt finish it)
- excuse me?!?!?
* i repeated it but i knew it was useless
- what does that mean?
- you know exactly what it means
- not really... (not really sure whether she didnt understand it as she wasnt native english or she pointed out i was wrong - but this whole `i dont understand, i didnt hear correctly etc. usually just a trick to brush men off - brush me off)
- well in this case see you around!
- see you...


either i long missed the escalation window which is completely understandable after 9 months or probably if i see myself on video back then i would bury my face into my hands or it wasnt a good idea to say this >>> or rather all 3 at once.

not really sure if anyone on these boards work with worse quality-girl hit ratio as me but whatever, you get used to failure after a while and crave it

 

[stratvm]

GIRL 2 was not convincing enough so i didnt push anything forward, the rest of them disappeared.

i started to frequent another fitness venue which is a hardcore spinning club (great for burning 1200kcal in 45mins and die twice in a row while doing that btw). the second time i went there i noticed the instructor girl (who i met 1st time) was more immersed in my eyes than usually necessary (i had exactly ZERO intention to hit on a superfit spinning instructor so i was completely unprepared).

i do think though that i missed the escalation window last time as his time she was friendly friendly not `i want you` friendly as 1st time. escalation windows suck. big time. i hate them. they should be banned.

anyway we had a chat this time too.

stratvm: did you just come from a workout?
instructor: yes i came from work...
s: no i mean from a workout - or you are THIS toned normally? by default?
i (suprised): well yes...
s: - slow smile - because it seems you`ve got quite a lot of exercise behind you - very attractive. you said you came from work, what do you do?
i: graphic design, - she went into details here (didnt really reacted on the compliment)
s: and these are your passion too? this is what you want to do in the future too?
i: yes, fitness and graphic design
s: i did it back in the days but now my brother took over
i: what platform? autocad or...
s: 3dsmax
i: well this is what i want to get in myself too...

* and then we got interrupted by her collague and i decided it was time to change shoes and call off the convo without letting it die or risk untimely interruption or stuff + i got scared. OK, i GOT scared and i reasoned with what i said.

after the session i wished a happy new year, took her hand, smiled, she didnt really hear what i said probably as she asked whether i would be here later this week or so i just told her louder that we see each other next week.

all in all i wasnt really sure if i missed an escalation window but she was fundamentally different than last time so probably i got into the entrance of the friendzone. doesnt matter, worst case scenario i have a hot girl to speak to before & after session.

thinking now it was kind of a mistake to call off the convo but i got scared. im not really sure what could i have done better 1st time, when i caught her staring at me at the end i looked back slowly and smiled slooooowly but she then turned away to chat and when i went there to check out she didnt get into the conversation.

meeting girls from online sources is so much easier as you can be 100% sure they are interested. too bad the quality from online is really crappy so you are FORCED to do daylight approaches. this is what i had to realize and there is no way around. and it sucks because its stressful & takes a lot of willpower to put yourself on the frontline and unless you have the skill and the looks it is one hell of a task to get to anywhere. but its too late to turn back.

 

[stratvm]

GIRL 2 realized that if she was working out without personal trainer she can gather fans. she has at the moment 5(!!!!) including a really big guy who thinks can get her by showing them exercises. at least i know joining the cloud of clowns is not a good idea.

instructor girl (IG):

of course i neither had the guts to ask her out nor felt any chance for a deeper/longer conversation. she was friendly friendly again though greeted me very warmly - as a friend does to a friend i would rather say. i find it nearly impossible to isolate her and as she needs to help the other guests and is about to hold a very energetic spinning session she is always extremely high energy.

conversation today:

IG greets me with a smile and goes into the room at once & disappears, i follow her in 2mins - inside:

IG: hi how are you?
* slowly walking in, smiling as sexy i can, taking her hand
stratvm: how was your NYE?
IG: good good and yours?
s: well i slept it over
IG: intentionally?
s: nay, went to bed at 5pm, you know to rest 1-2h and then woke up next morning
IG: awwww ahahaha
s: smile, keeping low energy, holding some pause and look into her eyes i said as a bye as there were 5 people waiting for her: `stylish and attractive as always`, like in a clint eastwood movie
IG: awww thanks

she ignored me afterwards, after the session she was very fast to get into conversation with a friend of hers so i didnt bother looking at her or something and waiting for 15mins for her to come out would have meant effort. i caught a few glimpses from other girls but was too scared to approach any of them and used tiredness as an excuse.

this whole story reminds me of my older stories of chasing 3 different south american colleagues back in london in 2010-2012 (2 argentinians and a brazilian).

she is acting really weird tbh, cant really decide if she is just being polite or nervous. anyway i keep a `social circle` strategy as i feel comfortable with it and im fairly convinced im friendzoned at best.

 

[Chase]

Strat-

Nice work mustering up the courage to talk to a few girls in the gym after a long period of silence. A few notes on Girl 1:

- hello G1 (walking next to her)
* notices me, friendly smile (omfg friendly smile............... i knew this was going to end bad)

Aye... it's weird when you don't approach for a long time, then suddenly get aggressive. You need to have a reason for the transition, or be VERY smooth and set it up so that it looks / feels like she's chasing - you can't just start walking next to her and hitting on her.

- you know what i was thinking about?
- ???
- i think we fancy each other... (couldnt finish it)

Particularly in environments where you're going to see the same people again and again (gym, work, school, etc.), you almost never want to go totally direct. And when you do, you just want it to be a compliment - you NEVER want to assume that she likes you; it's presumptuous, and makes you come across as socially unaware. The socially adroit man gives a woman an out until / unless things he can tell her she likes him in ways that feel completely "safe" to her (i.e., she doesn't feel the slightest bit of risk to her social status if she blushes and says "yes...").

- excuse me?!?!?
* i repeated it but i knew it was useless
- what does that mean?
- you know exactly what it means
- not really... (not really sure whether she didnt understand it as she wasnt native english or she pointed out i was wrong - but this whole `i dont understand, i didnt hear correctly etc. usually just a trick to brush men off - brush me off)
- well in this case see you around!
- see you...

Haha... sucks, but it's clear you knew you'd fumbled it the moment you walked next to her and she flashed that friendly smile, and it just unleashed a torrent of fumbling. That happens occasionally. Gives you the funniest ones to look back on - "Boy, THAT was awkward!"

On the plus side, you come out of it with clear notes on what NOT to do: don't

• Suddenly start hitting girls after not hitting on them for a year
• Walk next to girls to ask them out when you've had lower investment level opportunities to do so in the past and will likely have again
• Tell women it's obvious that they like you (unless you're already well into the interaction and can do so 'safely')

either i long missed the escalation window which is completely understandable after 9 months or probably if i see myself on video back then i would bury my face into my hands or it wasnt a good idea to say this >>> or rather all 3 at once.

Looks like all three to me.

There was probably still some shot there from the reception she gave you before... but in one fell swoop, it went down the drain.

not really sure if anyone on these boards work with worse quality-girl hit ratio as me but whatever, you get used to failure after a while and crave it

Don't worry about how your hit rate compares to other guys - worry about how your hit rate now compares to your hit rate 6 months ago or a year ago. If it's improving, you're doing things right. If it isn't... you either aren't getting enough practice, or you're not changing things around enough and trying new things that can see you pointed in the right direction.

Keep cracking at it, and just change things up and try some fresh ideas to see what you can pull off. It's a new year filled with lots of opportunity, and tons of women you have yet to meet!

Chase

 

[stratvm]

Thanks chase for the insights, appreciate them as always, and i was happy to present a textbook fail to learn from by the next generations to come!


GIRL 4

a regular, good looking indian, very fit, looks very experienced - im at the bench press she comes to the machine right next to me where i was looking during pause between sets. headphones in ear, buried into her mobile pushing buttons like a madman, doesnt give a single look or any indications she lives in this world. no makeup, no contact with the outside world.

wondered if she wanted anything, if this was an approach invitation which could have been easily it would have taken a real man to crack that shell she created around her.

 

[stratvm]

after a series of fails with tinder i decided to get out of my comfort zone and force myself to meet girls in the gym/streets/financial district/anywhere.

today in the gym i wanted to say hi 3 superfit girls but i didnt find a chance for 2 (good excuse) - the 3rd though was just about at hand. i noticed her checking me out while doing her workout with her personal trainer - natural tan, superfit body, probably highly paid finance girl. im not exaggerating, i almost shitted myself so the interaction was like:

me - turning around as i knew she was coming behind me - hi... you have a sec? lets stand over there
... i think i came across as intimidating and i felt was facing her too direct and she was probably a bit scared but nevertheless
me: youre so exotic i just HAD to say hi... im stratvm
her: hi... im (i forgot of course)
me: you work out here a lot? havent seen you before?
her: havent seen you before, you work out a lot (at the same time)
me: im a regular but usually come at 8, so your are around all the time huh? (i was totally nervouse so looked to the right and breathed in once heavily smiling and pointing this out)
her: pretty much yes
me: (not seeing any point in continuing as she was feeling awkward or something like this) well then see you around!
her: bye

i would describe her as
- felt intimidated as i came across too hard
- feeling awkward because i was nervous but open for a chat and know more about me. also here its not customary to do this. she wasnt friendly or reassuring or nice which i think is good
- nervous but certainly much less than me
- interested
- and liked i called her exotic and opened direct

me as:
- nervous as fuck, didnt even think just went into the convo

*** i saw her looking after me long i left back to the machines so either she was looking like: "wtf?" or was disappointed i ejected from the conversation. i just couldnt bear the pressure. next week i continue. i know its not a good idea to push for a meeting the 1st time with regulars in gym so this might even be a good start but it was so awkward i just have to laugh at myself. im imagining successful interactions with them and pushing myself to at least say hi/bye to see their faces.

i think just getting out of the comfort zone is not enough, we need success to get more confident.

GIRL 2

she had a bf for a while but here its about 1- 2months so single again. she really wants to say hi to me i feel but she just blocks and i feel myself a complete idiot so i just wont say anything

 

[stratvm]

after my FU with last weeks really cute girl (not hot, extremely good looking but cute not hot) i noticed another girl suddenly teleporting near me. she wanted to use the machine i was using, i said why not when finished she said something very nervously in a russian-like language half to me half to herself - or the void of the universe who knows

me: sorry i didnt speak russian
xxx: me neither <leaves>

.
.
.
she comes back

me: what language was that?
xxx: i dont know
me: but seriously, croatian?
xxx: its my language, half spanish half english
xxx: i was just about to ask if should clean the handle
me: ahh its ok, everything is dirty here like hell

and she leaves. she was nervous like hell. maybe i should have continued the conversation, warming her up, but i was just blown to pieces by the previous girl. wondered wtf she wanted maybe she was crazy. the good point is i entered into small talk with 0 effort and was enjoying her nervousness. next time i take advanage of the situation.