- Joined
- Sep 21, 2016
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I just got back to dinner with this great girl. Smart, cute, funny, a real catch. Problem is, she's friends -- close friends, with almost everyone I hang out with. I just transferred schools, she was on the outside of my friend group, and I was, and still am, very interested in her.
I landed a coffee date with her this Sunday. Things went pretty good, and her best friend told me she said "things went good". So, I landed another date with her Thursday night, (this just happened). This time, it was dinner at the place I work at. Things started great. Jokes were being made, I was teasing about her trying to get with me, I was deep diving, and using fractionation. As I went from a sad topic about her friend who tried to kill himself, and understanding why people commit suicide (too deep, I now believe - but I'm a Psych major, she's Neuro) and attempting to bring about happy emotions again, we hit a rut.
I don't know if it was the margaritas now in my system and me not seeing things clearly, but I didn't get the good juices flowing like they were before. Instead, I continued to talk about her and why she felt certain ways about her life, with less flirting then there could have been. Then, I noticed that she was looking away in the distance. At first I thought, this is a busy restaurant, something is worthy of being looked at. Nope, she was doing as Chase talks about "the bored look". At this point I knew I had fucked something up and had to change it up. She was asking me questions about myself that were actually quite interesting topics about me, but I met most of them with a vague answer and pregnant pauses to try and get her to chase, when really I just should have opened up about my: reason for transferring schools, what I write about, what I'm actually interested in, what a great weekend is for me, etc. All things, I asked her about extensively. At one point she said "I don't know you". And I looked at her with a surprised confusion, to meet another, "No, I don't know you". I replied, "You know me better than the average girl". This is when I believe "the bored look" was timezoned, either before or after.
After a bit more talking, I brought up how there's a secret relationship that's going on in the restaurant. Sloppily, I made an excuse to move my chair closer to her, in an attempt (that went nowhere) to get more physical. I used this as an entrance to get the sexual vibe going more so than it had before. I told her how I brought up to my coworker that he totally should bone his girl in the bathroom. She said no way that's a terrible place to do it. I teased her about how there's a broom closet where she works, you just gotta move the mop aside, and spice up the normally boring job with a little fun. It was working, well. I could feel the energy, and eye contact was far better than before.
Then - I missed my window.
Me - "Oh, so then where is somewhere more appropriate for that sort of thing?".
Her - "Home! (looks at me, but not necessarily in a sexual way)".
And then... I half blanked. Didn't know what to say, but I started emptying my food into the box. What I should have said was, "Wanna get out of here?" or something of the sort.
After this, she literally called me out that I used the secret relationship thing in order to move conversation towards sexual stuff, I just gave her the "Oh yea?" face. This is what I'm talking about though. Girl's smart as hell, and either over-your head sarcastic or candid. Turns me the fuck on! I may just not have the experience she's used to I suppose. Anyways..
I did my best to keep it up, mentioning how at her new job she can figure out a way.
Her - "Maybe if it's a doctor". (She will soon be working at a hospital).
Me - "You're a gold digger, huh?"
Her - *giggles* "Yea! (sarcastically) No I... (I cut her off)".
Me - "So what do you prefer more, looks or smarts, then?"
Her - "Well if I had to make a scale, I'd say Money, Looks, Intelligence.. wait no intelligence way below that, I don't care about that (she does, she's quite smart), Family, and Personality at the bottom, who needs personality?"
Me - "You don't care about personality? (Her - "Nope!") Interesting.. most girls aren't like that".
Shortly after, the sexual mood dying, but still there, I suggest we leave, and we do. I make good conversation with her on the way back, but none of which is sexual. We get in the car, drive a bit, and I ask her to come home at an important stop light.
Me: "So, you wanna head back with me?" (super obvious, poorly executed IMO)
Her: "No I can't I'm going out tonight with K**** and them".
Me: *referring to earlier conversation* "Well, *touch her leg*, I remember someone saying they don't need to go out when her friends are
".
Her: "Well its different when I actually want to go out tonight."
Me: "That's cool, just come over for like 5 minutes".
Her: "5 minutes? What's the point?". (At this part I just think she's playing hard to get, nope).
Me: "Yeah just come check out the house and you can go out after".
Her: "No I'm good". (No one has ever denied me at this point)
Me: "..............."
Then the car in front of me didn't move up enough for me to turn, so I say "Aw this guy's fucking me", to fill the silence. (To make things worse, yesterday I was talking with her friend, K**** about how I had talked in class on a day she missed, I normally don't, in order to end my anxiety from the two minutes of silence the professor put us through after and open ended question, refusing to answer it himself, the friend left to hang out with immediately after I let her out the car. Her and I have flirted but she's fucking my very good friend, so we both understand the friend zone at hand. No real objection since I was more concerned with her friend I'm crushing on).
I don't remember exactly what I said at this point, but it was probably as ugly as a pink-socked donkey's ass. We drive to where I would turn for her street.
Her: "You can turn right here..."
Me: *smiling* "Naah, that's fine". (keep driving to my street, we live very close)
Her: *smiling, in a way that's laughing at the situation* "Ookay, and you just missed the turn".
Me: "Like I said, just come in for 5 minutes". (Back of my head, don't give up, you're this close).
Her: "What's the point, hop in hop out? That's all 5 minutes is good for."
Me: "I think you just described 2 seconds, you gotta check the place out".
I can't remember exactly what she said, but this was the last good moment I had before utter defeat.
Me: "Oh, so you just wanna jump straight to it? *mischievous grin*
Her: *excited and smiling* says something, but it was that she understood the message, but still wasn't going to (important note, the sexual tension was there. It made me think, I could have been throwing her shit like this the whole time, what the fuck is wrong with me?)
Her: "You can just turn right on the next one" (taking full control)
Me: "Okay, but you're gonna be sorry you didn't".
Her: *sarcastically* "Yea, I'm gonna be so sad I didn't get to see the place"
Me: "I know, we got a comfortable, colorful couch in there, and... (she cuts me off)"
Utter Defeat - Elapsed in under two minutes
Her: *quickly* "What color is it?"
Me: "That's a mystery, you'll have to see for yourself". (This might work on average and below average intelligence girls. Considering the fact I was avoiding questions about myself, she had to have seen my card. Maybe I'm being dramatic and paranoid, but it very much seems that she knew I was trying to be mysterious after this).
Her: "Oh, okay".
Driving to her house, conversation diminishing to a silent roll up to her house, deciding where to let her out.
I remember saying I had fun, I don't remember if she said anything - she might of, but I was all in my feelings at this point and my memories fading.
Me: "Cya."
Her: "Bye. Are you coming out?"
Me: "Nah I can't (test tomorrow)".
Her: "Oh, okay... bye".
Me: "Cya" *coldly with a dash of sadness* , while, mind you I pathetically put my arm up after she turned to somehow figure a way to kiss her. I was a floundering fish at this point. No contact, no nothing. (Again, I was pretty up in my feelings at this point, trying to hide it). (She must be thinking, in her reserved, sexy, sarcastic ways, "poor G.A. !! not getting laid after a real date for once in his life!") Or perhaps I'm just beating myself up too much, but that's how it felt.
The fact that she's leaving to her other intelligent, beautiful sorority friends is a very bad thing. She'll likely tell them all about how I missed her screens, in an attempt to remain mysterious, and was ultimately being superficial. Not to say that the rest of our date didn't go decent to well, but my god did I botch that ending. The fact she's so well known by all my friends, and that they know I've been going the extra mile (with many successes) to get girls is well, concerning. I feel as though I'll be carded a man-whore, or a wanna-be player in no time. But, again, I'm pretty down about the whole thing considering it's been a while that I've actually been interested this much in a girl.
Keep it real folks.
G.A.
I landed a coffee date with her this Sunday. Things went pretty good, and her best friend told me she said "things went good". So, I landed another date with her Thursday night, (this just happened). This time, it was dinner at the place I work at. Things started great. Jokes were being made, I was teasing about her trying to get with me, I was deep diving, and using fractionation. As I went from a sad topic about her friend who tried to kill himself, and understanding why people commit suicide (too deep, I now believe - but I'm a Psych major, she's Neuro) and attempting to bring about happy emotions again, we hit a rut.
I don't know if it was the margaritas now in my system and me not seeing things clearly, but I didn't get the good juices flowing like they were before. Instead, I continued to talk about her and why she felt certain ways about her life, with less flirting then there could have been. Then, I noticed that she was looking away in the distance. At first I thought, this is a busy restaurant, something is worthy of being looked at. Nope, she was doing as Chase talks about "the bored look". At this point I knew I had fucked something up and had to change it up. She was asking me questions about myself that were actually quite interesting topics about me, but I met most of them with a vague answer and pregnant pauses to try and get her to chase, when really I just should have opened up about my: reason for transferring schools, what I write about, what I'm actually interested in, what a great weekend is for me, etc. All things, I asked her about extensively. At one point she said "I don't know you". And I looked at her with a surprised confusion, to meet another, "No, I don't know you". I replied, "You know me better than the average girl". This is when I believe "the bored look" was timezoned, either before or after.
After a bit more talking, I brought up how there's a secret relationship that's going on in the restaurant. Sloppily, I made an excuse to move my chair closer to her, in an attempt (that went nowhere) to get more physical. I used this as an entrance to get the sexual vibe going more so than it had before. I told her how I brought up to my coworker that he totally should bone his girl in the bathroom. She said no way that's a terrible place to do it. I teased her about how there's a broom closet where she works, you just gotta move the mop aside, and spice up the normally boring job with a little fun. It was working, well. I could feel the energy, and eye contact was far better than before.
Then - I missed my window.
Me - "Oh, so then where is somewhere more appropriate for that sort of thing?".
Her - "Home! (looks at me, but not necessarily in a sexual way)".
And then... I half blanked. Didn't know what to say, but I started emptying my food into the box. What I should have said was, "Wanna get out of here?" or something of the sort.
After this, she literally called me out that I used the secret relationship thing in order to move conversation towards sexual stuff, I just gave her the "Oh yea?" face. This is what I'm talking about though. Girl's smart as hell, and either over-your head sarcastic or candid. Turns me the fuck on! I may just not have the experience she's used to I suppose. Anyways..
I did my best to keep it up, mentioning how at her new job she can figure out a way.
Her - "Maybe if it's a doctor". (She will soon be working at a hospital).
Me - "You're a gold digger, huh?"
Her - *giggles* "Yea! (sarcastically) No I... (I cut her off)".
Me - "So what do you prefer more, looks or smarts, then?"
Her - "Well if I had to make a scale, I'd say Money, Looks, Intelligence.. wait no intelligence way below that, I don't care about that (she does, she's quite smart), Family, and Personality at the bottom, who needs personality?"
Me - "You don't care about personality? (Her - "Nope!") Interesting.. most girls aren't like that".
Shortly after, the sexual mood dying, but still there, I suggest we leave, and we do. I make good conversation with her on the way back, but none of which is sexual. We get in the car, drive a bit, and I ask her to come home at an important stop light.
Me: "So, you wanna head back with me?" (super obvious, poorly executed IMO)
Her: "No I can't I'm going out tonight with K**** and them".
Me: *referring to earlier conversation* "Well, *touch her leg*, I remember someone saying they don't need to go out when her friends are
".Her: "Well its different when I actually want to go out tonight."
Me: "That's cool, just come over for like 5 minutes".
Her: "5 minutes? What's the point?". (At this part I just think she's playing hard to get, nope).
Me: "Yeah just come check out the house and you can go out after".
Her: "No I'm good". (No one has ever denied me at this point)
Me: "..............."
Then the car in front of me didn't move up enough for me to turn, so I say "Aw this guy's fucking me", to fill the silence. (To make things worse, yesterday I was talking with her friend, K**** about how I had talked in class on a day she missed, I normally don't, in order to end my anxiety from the two minutes of silence the professor put us through after and open ended question, refusing to answer it himself, the friend left to hang out with immediately after I let her out the car. Her and I have flirted but she's fucking my very good friend, so we both understand the friend zone at hand. No real objection since I was more concerned with her friend I'm crushing on).
I don't remember exactly what I said at this point, but it was probably as ugly as a pink-socked donkey's ass. We drive to where I would turn for her street.
Her: "You can turn right here..."
Me: *smiling* "Naah, that's fine". (keep driving to my street, we live very close)
Her: *smiling, in a way that's laughing at the situation* "Ookay, and you just missed the turn".
Me: "Like I said, just come in for 5 minutes
". (Back of my head, don't give up, you're this close).Her: "What's the point, hop in hop out? That's all 5 minutes is good for."
Me: "I think you just described 2 seconds, you gotta check the place out".
I can't remember exactly what she said, but this was the last good moment I had before utter defeat.
Me: "Oh, so you just wanna jump straight to it? *mischievous grin*
Her: *excited and smiling* says something, but it was that she understood the message, but still wasn't going to (important note, the sexual tension was there. It made me think, I could have been throwing her shit like this the whole time, what the fuck is wrong with me?)
Her: "You can just turn right on the next one" (taking full control)
Me: "Okay, but you're gonna be sorry you didn't".
Her: *sarcastically* "Yea, I'm gonna be so sad I didn't get to see the place"
Me: "I know, we got a comfortable, colorful couch in there, and... (she cuts me off)"
Utter Defeat - Elapsed in under two minutes
Her: *quickly* "What color is it?"
Me: "That's a mystery, you'll have to see for yourself". (This might work on average and below average intelligence girls. Considering the fact I was avoiding questions about myself, she had to have seen my card. Maybe I'm being dramatic and paranoid, but it very much seems that she knew I was trying to be mysterious after this).
Her: "Oh, okay".
Driving to her house, conversation diminishing to a silent roll up to her house, deciding where to let her out.
I remember saying I had fun, I don't remember if she said anything - she might of, but I was all in my feelings at this point and my memories fading.
Me: "Cya."
Her: "Bye. Are you coming out?"
Me: "Nah I can't (test tomorrow)".
Her: "Oh, okay... bye".
Me: "Cya" *coldly with a dash of sadness* , while, mind you I pathetically put my arm up after she turned to somehow figure a way to kiss her. I was a floundering fish at this point. No contact, no nothing. (Again, I was pretty up in my feelings at this point, trying to hide it). (She must be thinking, in her reserved, sexy, sarcastic ways, "poor G.A. !! not getting laid after a real date for once in his life!") Or perhaps I'm just beating myself up too much, but that's how it felt.
The fact that she's leaving to her other intelligent, beautiful sorority friends is a very bad thing. She'll likely tell them all about how I missed her screens, in an attempt to remain mysterious, and was ultimately being superficial. Not to say that the rest of our date didn't go decent to well, but my god did I botch that ending. The fact she's so well known by all my friends, and that they know I've been going the extra mile (with many successes) to get girls is well, concerning. I feel as though I'll be carded a man-whore, or a wanna-be player in no time. But, again, I'm pretty down about the whole thing considering it's been a while that I've actually been interested this much in a girl.
Keep it real folks.
G.A.
