How can I frame a girl as a chaser when I was the one who literally approached her?

[Calibration]

This may be a basic question but I fail to understand. I mostly do cold approach and sometimes it's street approach where I literally run to approach her. Most of the guys on this forum seems to frame the girl as the one who is chasing. I get that it's a lot easier to game with that frame but how do you frame that to begin with. I tease, qualify, build attraction and all that. However, when it comes to asking her out on a date or taking her home, I will have to lead and specially over texting, it's hard to not come across as either the chaser or rude( if I'm sounding cocky).

I posted another thread yesterday and it's in reference to that but it also applies to other scenarios:

Thread 'Is LJBF end of game?'
https://www.skilledseducer.com/threads/is-ljbf-end-of-game.26005/

Guys here rightly pointed that I came across rude but all I wanted was not to come across as chasing and sound assertive.

 

[Fluxcapacitor]

@Shawn dude! Your texting in the LJBF thread wasn't assertive and ironically borderline chasing. You got some really good advice from the dudes about not mentioning the word date and giving away to much power. They basically covered everything.

If you're following @Skills text guide of rapport > soft close > hard close - you're not chasing, you're socially calibrated. You have to lead and set things up, it's how you do this that makes the difference.

"Trying to look good for our date" works if it's a high buying temperature. You then failed her shit test and shot yourself in the foot with your horrible reply qualifying her immediately telling her she's attractive rather than being unreactive and persisting in a cool way.

This is more in response to your LJBF thread but your texting put you in her frame and made you the chaser. Framing her as the chaser is impossible in this situation and you need a better building block. You can only work with what you've got, so you've now got to show you're cool and flip the script.

To sound more assertive, get to a high point in conversation > "you seem cool, we should grab some drinks sometime" - this is a soft close and I can gauge her interest. I've also not asked her anything, I've implied she's said yes. WE should grab drinks sets this as mutual. It's also low pressure. The framing comes either before or after this, this is designed to get her out where I've got more control and influence over the interaction.

 

[ulrich]

Think of it as your frame being: “Of course I’m hitting on you, you are throwing me a lot of signals.”

Secrets to Getting Girls: Chase Framing

Alright gentlemen, if you feel like fishing with dynamite, I’m going to show you how in this post on Chase Framing. This is how to get girls to chase you. If your goal is women pursuing you, women chasing after you, women trying to sleep with you… chase framing is the closest thing to a magic...

www.girlschase.com

 

[Calibration]

I don't always approach only when a girl gives IOIs

 

[Vision]

I don't always approach only when a girl gives IOIs

You don't need to... she doesn't know if she's giving you signals or not.

 

[ulrich]

You don't need to... she doesn't know if she's giving you signals or not.

I’ll add that, unless they are very experienced, girls tend to get curious to the suggestion that they were signaling to you.

“Did I signal to him?, OMG”
“What did I do?”
“Was I too obvious???”

 

[ElderPrice]

Leading isn't chasing.

 

[moom]

Meta Frame:
Approach - Of course I approached you, you gave me the most obvious signals.

Pre-hook-
I talk alot during this part and try to get her to hook on something asap if she hasn’t already by showing some value. Usually my sequence is
make her laugh > start asking some surface level questions and relate back with more laughter while also throwing some value in and baiting her at the same time (ie “hows your day been?” “good, how about yours” “phenomenal, the funniest thing just happened to my friend melinda” then go into story that paints you as a lover. Then when she starts responding, stop her mid sentence and throw a genuine compliment). I find the pre-hook is hard for me to flip the frame and instead try to talk them into hooking.

Post-hook -
a) Chase frames
b) not giving them complete answers (ie “whats your name?” “see-more butts”)
c) grabbing her hand and putting it on your body somewhere then saying “cant keep your hands off huh “
d) More baiting
e) sex talk or talking about anything that paints you as a great lover of any kind usually gets them intrigued
f) push / pull (youre looking for dissapointment when you push)
g) body rocking
h) bored look

End game-
a) “we are not having sex tonight” lol
b) “quit tempting me so much”

These are just some of the MANY tactics on this site lol. Everything on this site is geared to make her chase. Focus on increasing her investment while not investing more than the bare minimum yourself + these tactics + a meta frame of “of course you’re chasing me and want me, im a rare breed of man that could change your life romantically or sexually” will get you there in no time.

Of course, keep trying to internalise any mindsets that would help her chase. I know im better in bed than about 90% of men, can make really hot girls fall in love with me, and I have a dominant, romantic, and adventurous personality. These mindsets help me.

When you believe it, they believe it too post-hook.


A most recent story i wanted to share:

Girlfriend was out of town last saturday so my best friend and I hit a dance club to socialize and dance. I had been dancing at the front of the stage for like 30 minutes and I saw this beautiful asian girl eyeing me. Eventually she grabbed a drink and decided to carry this drink right through the busiest part of the crowd (lol?). She purposely crashes into me and a little bit of her drink spills. She loudly exclaims “OH MY GOD” while looking at me and giving me the stink eye. I just look at her, strong eye contact, and slowly smile. Small smile to a wide smile with a mischievous look and she starts smiling right back. Right then I knew she had just made a scene for the sake of getting my attention and testing me at the same time. All I do is pull her into me and say “thats one way to say hello, you’re cute, im moom.” Instantly hooked lol, let her go after a few minutes because im not single but was a funny thing to see, i love mischievous women lol

 

[TomInHo]

There are lots of ways to introduce chase frames into your interactions. It really helps to internalize the fact that girls really dig you and you're giving them an opportunity to enter into your reality.

But for practicality her are some things you can do/say

Approach hover and get her to look at you then say "You can't check me out all night and not introduce yourself to me"

Hook "So tell me... what do you like to do for fun other than eating, sleeping and picking up sexy guys?"

When she asks what you do for work "I'm an exotic dancer" usually they get excited and ask where you work.. "I'll only tell you if you promise not to stalk me"

When she asks for your social media "I must warn you. I have a lot of shirtless/sexy photos on there. Are you sure you can handle it before I give it to you?"

Sex Stories Tell stories in a manner where girls are seducing you, not the other way around...

False Vulnerability "Can I ask you a relationship question? What makes a woman only want to use a man for sex but not date him. I've been going through a period of girls viewing me as a piece of meat and wondering what I may be doing wrong"

Pull "I'm going to grab some drinks at my place, you're welcome to join as long as you promise not to grope me too much"

Paint yourself as a man that is desired but isn't won over so easily. Chicks dig it so much it's ridiculous

 

[Calibration]

There are lots of ways to introduce chase frames into your interactions. It really helps to internalize the fact that girls really dig you and you're giving them an opportunity to enter into your reality.

But for practicality her are some things you can do/say

Approach hover and get her to look at you then say "You can't check me out all night and not introduce yourself to me"

All of the below are excellent, especially the false vulnerability... except that when I approach her she wouldn't even have noticed me until I approach her. That's where the dynamic changes right from the beginning and it's a frame war if I have to use the below

Hook "So tell me... what do you like to do for fun other than eating, sleeping and picking up sexy guys?"

When she asks what you do for work "I'm an exotic dancer" usually they get excited and ask where you work.. "I'll only tell you if you promise not to stalk me"

When she asks for your social media "I must warn you. I have a lot of shirtless/sexy photos on there. Are you sure you can handle it before I give it to you?"

Sex Stories Tell stories in a manner where girls are seducing you, not the other way around...

False Vulnerability "Can I ask you a relationship question? What makes a woman only want to use a man for sex but not date him. I've been going through a period of girls viewing me as a piece of meat and wondering what I may be doing wrong"

Pull "I'm going to grab some drinks at my place, you're welcome to join as long as you promise not to grope me too much"

Paint yourself as a man that is desired but isn't won over so easily. Chicks dig it so much it's ridiculous

 

[TomInHo]

All of the below are excellent, especially the false vulnerability... except that when I approach her she wouldn't even have noticed me until I approach her. That's where the dynamic changes right from the beginning and it's a frame war if I have to use the below

It all starts with your Fundamentals and Pre-Approach.

For example if you look like a sexy hunk of man, and then approach girls that gave you approach invitations, chase frames will be easier to maintain throughout the interaction.

But if your fundamentals are horrible and you approach girls that showed no initial interest with direct/compliment openers, the frame will be set as you being the chaser.

Believe it or not, a lot of game is done before you open your mouth at the approach. Because a lot of the time, you may think that you smashed a new girl because you ran super tight game and manipulated the situation, when in reality she actually picked you first and just made herself available to your advances.

Seduction is a lot more mutual than must of us give credit