How do regular people do it?

[TomGray]

This whole dating thing, how do people who don't study pick-up do it? It seems to me that a lot of people are just getting new girlfriends after a couple of months after leaving the old ones. From what I can remember of the ONE girl who liked me before I started this and the ONE date we went on (where she tried to have sex with me but I didn't realize) it involved a lot of shooting in the dark and expecting things to happen.

So how do they do it?

 

[Ross]

There's a lot of factors. Here's a few scenarios:

1. My freshman roommate is a high value personality guy. He has a large entourage of women chasing after him, but these are mostly low value women who don't get a whole lot of action anyways. He met a girl exactly like him; high value personality, large entourage of low value men chasing her. We were in their friend group and both did their normal routines of buffing up their values to each other implicitly and making the other one jealous, and did it until 6 months later when we basically forced my roommate to ask her out.

2. My younger brother had a lower value girl befriend him and chase after him for a relationship for a while. Eventually she told him she liked him, and he decided to ask her out because he didn't have any other options.

For me, it boils down to a few things:

- Natural game; they were taught from a young age to follow certain things such as being high value, yet within reach or have an intense sexual vibe.
- Pure blind luck and being the right person at the right time.

It's a rare skill for a man to be able to go up to a random woman and turn that into a lay very consistently. How rare is it for a normal-looking guy to approach 1000 women with the idea of logistically sleeping with them or asking them out and get at least one lay or girlfriend? Probably not very rare.

 

[Nuncle]

Yes as far as I can see the "PUA" ethos differs from regular people who are good with women in two ways:

1) The quality of women pulled - PUAs are generally only interested in 8s,9s and 10s and this is what they devote themselves to learning. I had a couple of room mates at college who were very good with women and generally came home with a woman every time we had a night out much to my envy. But, looking back, these were actually very average value women (or low value in a lot of cases). PUAs would actually turn down such women and consider chasing them a waste of time.

2) Consistency of results - In my late twenties I had a room mate who was a very handsome, charismatic, dominant guy and yes had a way above average success rate with the ladies, and generally they were pretty high value ladies as well (some times less so). But nevertheless I watched him take lots and lots of embarassing/hilarious crash-and-burns too. It was just that his natural qualities increased his hit rate to the point he generally got something eventually. PUAs as I understand it are literally beating women off them. They have to decide which one to take. They can go to the mall, pick out a woman and take her home etc. etc. Also the sex is apparently pretty spectacular as opposed to the comedic drunken fumblings that regular people enjoy.

As to how the regular people do it it's a combination of dominance, self-assurance, not supplicating and coming across as competent. Women like competent men. Self assurance I would say it's the main thing. It prevents them supplicating.

Nevertheless confront them with a woman who is significantly higher value than them and they will soon start supplicating and generally going to pieces. PUAs don't. Also regular people pay less attention to things like logisitics, boyfriend destroyers, advanced psychology, investment, etc. And they get the subtleties wrong. So for example their teasing will be too harsh and personal and their commands will be too obvious and graceless.