How do you get quick investment to equalize the frame?

[archimedes]

What are the three phases, value, compliance/investment and attainability?

Fuktt up the last one numerous times I'm sure. Women am I right. They objectify themselves. They force objectification because they are.. over responsive and over dependent on our words, actions, vibes, making themselves basically objects in a way. Yet others of them complain.

Anyway my Q is on compliance. Well investment generally. Can you get investment without compliance per se? Anyway this is so important for me.

People say I speak in extreme languagee. I don't know but a man like me typically starts as the invested one, the losing one or the invested one based on her looks and personality and youth and everything. If she doesn't have a boyfriend or husband and she's not damaged inside they almost always have ZERO INVESTMENT IN YOU, ZERO TRUST. and you have hope in them, investment in them. This is what is the FUKT UP BEGINNING, THE HELL PHASE.

I actually didn't use to care. I'm not a pussy. I could brush off rejection but that which doesn't kill you makes you sorer. I'm not afraid of it. I despise it. And yes I'm afraid of it that I want to avoid it.

The answer must them be twofold- invest less oneself and get more investment from them, to equalize or tip in ones favor. But how? I don't think I can not invest or care. It would be a LIE. If I see my type I like. Do I have an ego? You're God damn right. Does it get hurt? All the time. Abused and suffers.

But it's not vanity. I don't need every woman to like me for my vanity but you have to get them invested. In the beginning you're losing. It's like a football/soccer game (funny i call it football even though I'm American). You start 7 points behind.

Why do I always fail? I don't know but a part of me wants to always be a little dominant. What effects does this have on things? Does it make me combative? Does it make them cast me out? This could explain my experiences but I can't just be a pussy. What do they want in a man? I know what they need. They need to feel something and they need to be invested. I can't do anything if they're not invested. I'll get hurt. I'll be deluded. How? How practically? Seems like they know all the games. Every single time I start behind. Some say be light, be funny. What if that's not your personality?

Attainability too and I think value is a non issue at this point. They act all flirty and friendly but it's fake until they're invested. I need to know how. I had no desire to be a pimp or a pimp personality but this is what that personality does. Whatever I need is what I need, whatever it is, if it's that or something else even if it's distasteful. I'm the type of guy that's afraid of stigma or maybe is too rigid, in self identity but they WILL fly away, flake and always disappoint and hurt until I get them invested.

I love being natural. I hate being an engineer pilot. I'm probably doing the right thing to so many women but not the ones I care about, while I chase the ones I care about. How do you get sex from someone you don't care that much about, casual sex? How do you to that morally? And have it not interfere with the one's you do care about? Seems like it's just easier to skip that.

How, like if I meet someone dancing and have an hour tops but really only a few dances, how to I get investment, get them hooked? I have a preference for non verbal assumed attraction. Let the body speak for itself, hold strong physical frame and touch her.. and get her opening and sharing, but women these days seem really closed and intimidated and the weirdest wokest stuff often comes out of their mouths. It's so hard.. but we can work with that. There needs to be investment AND there not much time OR she'll shit on your heart, every time and NEVER feel like she did anything wrong AND I want all this to be natural and smooth. I want to build love and trust with a person. It is soooooo hard and aggravating

Maybe strong touch can do it. Even squeeze punishingly. There needs to be a greater equality, or I will get hurt and be mad at life. There is absolutely zero accountability and equality in the beginning and that's usually how it ends. There is a need to emotionally hook them. When I say emotionally, I don't mean intrigue them but strongly emotionally commit them. Otherwise I'll die single and sexless and hate them. The other people in the world are gonna judge and misunderstand this and hate. When I was a kid I always wondered why people like Notorious B I G always sang about haters. Like get over it you're successful who hates you. Weak that you're a victim. And Trump calling others out. Now I get it. You have to call it out or they'll crocodile chomp you. To all the haters this is about equality. Achieving it because attractive women or women in general start out way ahead in terms of no investment. I don't like using the word power. Investment serves the same role. It seems VERY hard especially in our modern culture to create strong investment on her part but it seems like the ONLY way and the main way, and a way I overlooked focusing on passively bringing value hard won from life. In getting it I don't want to always have you be on guard. In fixing this issue I want to be able to go back in my mind to so many failures and ease my anxiety about the future, having gained sure knowledge, but I need to get that knowledge and skill. I want a gf and a wife, but I never wanted to be some schmuck. They've only ever hurt me by lying to my face and being closed and secretive. Investment down the road is them opening up to me. I'm a man that needs disclosures. Don't they want to be seen and known? Isn't that what's feminine? I need them, or a good one of them, to be invested in ME, and then I can invest in her, give her a life, take her out, give her children etc etc.. but it has to start in one hour quicky sessions where they are to be met so it has to be fast

 

[Bill]

Qualification can create investment

 

[archimedes]

Qualification can create investment

thanks. The thing is man, she's got to get hooked, and drawn in. Whatever girl. Thing is life is lame. It's not a lame forum here, it's a great forum but it's lame I'm doing this on a saturday afternoon because I have nothing else.

It's hard because the frame is always in her favor at the beginning. A man could be a good man with a lot to offer but she sees the world through her feelings and a man has to provide for them in a steady stream. The easiest way to do this is get her hooked and invested, and then not break that gain off by bad autistic failure to convey empathy or echo.

I think a lot of the fast seduction/speed seduction concepts were about turning the tables, from frustrated men, and rightfully frustrated. They have zero investment at first and they'll use you. They'll use you to be "friends". I didn't know women, some women, were active in seeking friends and using sexuality to get that. They are friend hunters as much as we are girl hunters. Now I know. They play dumb. They play dumb, they play indifferent. They are maskers. People say women are more emotionally expressive. In my experience they are great maskers. They say autists mask. They mask.

This has to be flipped, not even from a male emotional point of view, from frustration, but of actual legitimate necessity.

Flake flake flake flake flake. This is so disheartening. This is so enervating and demoralizing. It doesn't sharpen a man's balls. It dulls them. I guess that one guy, the Models guy, talks about polarizing. She's in or out. You find out soon. the problem with his model, and it's good otherwise, is that it's hard to meet enough, and I basically tried that approach by being more blunt and direct only to trigger auto-rejection when a girl seemed to vibe with me. You don't want to waste your time with girls, or I don't, and when I say time, it really means time plus emotion, plus headspace, plus confidence plus so much else. You don't want to have anyone remorselessly waste that but often you don't have a choice.

I would like to solve my empathy problem from my asperger like worldview, or my 'extreme male brain' of cold hard rationalism. That will likely prevent more breaks. Then, I need a woman, a good woman, connected, hooked, flooded with attachment hormones, attached. I need this from a keeper. I am tired of being the loser. It is too much. I am nobody's slave. The world treats you like dirt. The world constantly makes you prove yourself. I want to judge the world, but only when i'm in a position of strength where I can punish the world. I guess making them invested is the first step. This is important.

I guess attainability matters too. That is certainly a true concept but I have no idea how to assess whether that has every been a factor and by how much. I'm sure it has, but women are so concealed. I don't know to what degree their flaking and breaking off is due to lack of investment or feeling I'm unattainable but that has to be considered too.

I don't want to be hardcore, an extremist. I never want to be submissive and passive but I never want to be so intense, but the world always screwed me over. Maybe it meant to give to me but my Aspergers got in the way. I don't know. But for that, would I be married with children? But I also know it dicked me, so I come off kind of intense. Maybe i'm in the wrong civilization, but I'm sunk here, in real estate. Maybe Canada is better. Maybe Europe. I don't know. I don't want to have to run away and move away. I don't want to be so hardcore.

They need investment. This is about equality. This is about them meeting me halfway. I'm not talking about role reversal. I'm talking about effort and commitment. Securing both ends- value and attainability, all that's left is investment, so I have to be sure to appear attainable. how sensitive they are. How much of a mind reader I must be. How neurotic I must be AND pursue my career and all that. Whatever happened to a woman being a man's helper? Why is this a war? I heard that - maybe it was chase- you shouldn't bring too much of a combative energy to women, because you'll get that back, and I probably get that. I want to be partners but everything always gets twisted.

As a probably Aspie, I struggle a lot with providing their type of expected "empathy" and it probably breaks things, that are going great, and Chase has talked about that, but I think... sorry I lost my train of thought. Oh yes, the idea is that I "maybe" saw these things as failed tests, after the fact. Maybe. Everyone's always talking about how women test men. Too much, I think they talk about this. What if they are not 'tests'? What is a test anyways? if a test is unconscious, is it really a test? What if a man disappoints them but they weren't trying to test? So I decided tests are a subset of a greater set called challenges, and I fail those challenges as an aspie. I some hear my tenant neighbor making love to his girlfriend, and he's very good. She's loving it, but the other day I heard him consoling her on the phone. The guy is good, but man it sounded like he was talking to a baby, like baby needed comfort. I should probably try for a week to treat women like babies and see what the results are. If people, male or female, are run primarily by their feelings and if they are fragile then they should be far from power, but there are many women I respect, but this is how I heard my neighbor successfully comfort his girl. Women are not men. But then they want to act tough. It's all an act, and an act you have to pretend you're impressed by, just like a kid. "Look at how strong you are. I'm so proud of you". If you do that, I think they might love you. If you don't, I think they might hate you. I have to not be stupid. I have to do stuff like that.