How to act with this chick?

[weekendwarrior]

Hi Guys,

I know I'm going to be ridiculed for this but here it goes. I met this chick about 4 months ago, I've never been able to isolate her (except once when I got her to my car to go home and she quickly back peddled and "couldn't leave her friends". I think she wanted to position me to a boyfriend role at this time), I've never been able to get her out on a date and after asking 3 times and getting nowhere I stopped even trying. I've been meeting other chicks, I'm not stuck on this one, I just don't know how to act towards her now.

On and off throughout the months, even after I stopped trying with her, she'd bump into me on a night out and we'd end up making out and hanging out together, I think she was using me for attention and an ego boost. I've overheard her friends tell her she can't do better than me and she should hook up with me. If it was at the end of a quiet night and no options left, I didn't mind the attention.

The last time we were out in the same club together she reacted badly that someone thought we had slept together. I joked about it with self-depreciation humour, used it as a chance to frame it that I don't kiss and tell which put her mind at ease that I hadn't been telling everyone we had.

Later in the night I seen her with a guy, that’s cool, she doesn't owe me anything, I don't own her, she can do what she wants, I'll meet other chicks. I didn't get anywhere with other chicks this night which sucked, she came up to me at the end of the night and asks if she can talk to me. She's done this on and off throughout the months and it's like she's trying to have the relationship talk but she backs out of it because it doesn't live up to her Disney where the guy should do this. I'm not getting into a relationship with a chick I haven't slept with yet. (More reason to think she's framing me as a boyfriend candidate).

She starts of apologising for earlier and saying she didn't mean it like that and trying to act how she typically does, wanting to hold my hand and play happy couples. My ego is in the way, I don't do second place and although she doesn't owe me anything I find this insulting. I know some guys here don't care if a chick kisses another guy as long as the chicks coming home and shagging them (you), I've tried to adopt this attitude, but it hasn't got me anywhere and the track record with this chick would suggest I wouldn't have got her home with me anyway.

I pied her off with a cold shoulder and told her that she looked busier earlier in the night. I know this might have looked like I was butt hurt about it, but I am not going to reward bad behaviour and let her think it's acceptable to come crawling back like this. She should be grateful I'm talking to her; her friends have even told her she can't do better.

She texts me the next day, we exchanged a couple messaged before she's went ghost for a week (and more, still silence). I can't help but think she should be trying to make it up to me not ignoring me. If she feels awkward by what she's done I fail to see why she even messaged the day after in the first place.

How do I act towards this chick if she tries to talk to me? I won't be approaching her; I'm going to be too busy with other chicks! I just think blanking her completely seems to emotional a response

Warrior

 

[StrayDog]

what is the point in investing all this time and energy into some drama filled back and forth with some girl who is clearly just keeping you around as an option. She pulls away when you advance and then rehooks you when she senses she might lose your attention. Or maybe she really likes you but you are coming across as super player or something. But either way, you have failed to seal the deal and there is a bad precedent going on here of this back and forth go know where game y'all are playing

Giving the cold shoulder tends to convey that you are so effected by her that you have to draw this hard line. You said it yourself. Your ego is all caught up in it and you find her behavior insulting. Naw man, just be cool and focus your attention somewhere else. If you cross paths just just aknowledge her prssence in passing like (in a warm tone) " hey (girls name), good to see ya" and keep walking. If she approaches you. Be like "Hey (girls name) how have you been? Blah blah blah very brief small talk. Well, glad you're doing well imma go catch my friend over there" and bounce. Don't ignore her, be warm, brief, and ultimately univested.