I've been doing a lot of cold approach or social circle number pickups recently. I've read the article on texting, and how you should send an icebreaker text like "Hey $girl_name, wonderful to have met ~ $my_name" about an hour or so after exchanging numbers.
I've been wondering how to actually exchange the number though, i.e. should I just add her as a contact, and then give her my number, should I call her so she gets my number, should I send a text so she gets my number, etc.?
Previously, my typical number exchange would be as follows:
- propose we exchange numbers, she agrees
- I whip out my phone, ask for her number, type it into a text message that simply has my first name in it, then send that message, and tell her I'm texting you with my name
- ask if she got the message
This has a few advantages:
a) quick/fast, no need for me to give her my number afterwards. I always find the number exchange to be slightly awkward, and I'd like to get it done as quickly and efficiently as possible and get back to chatting
b) By sending and asking if she received the text, we confirm that we typed the number correctly
c) By sending my name, she knows exactly who the text is from, and if she happened to have forgotten my name, it provides a social "get out of jail free" card to remind her of my name.
d) If I happened to forget her name, I'll ask her how to spell her name while typing in the contact, which gives me a social "get out of jail free" card to remind me of her name
The only disadvantage to this system, is that following up a text of "$my_name" with "Hey $girl_name, wonderful to have met, ~ $my_name" feels slightly repetitive.
I've tried making my first text the icebreaker text itself, but it feels a bit awkward typing out a longer message while the girl is waiting for me to start talking to her again.
I've tried just storing her number as a contact, but that loses advantages B/C. Sometimes the girl straight up asks me to text her with my name so she knows who the number is from.
I've tried getting her number, and then giving her my number, so I can "save" the icebreaker text for later. But it feels redundant to read out my number into her phone after she already did it for me.
I realize this is a really small minutiae, but I was curious about what you guys have found best for the smoothest "number exchange".
I've been wondering how to actually exchange the number though, i.e. should I just add her as a contact, and then give her my number, should I call her so she gets my number, should I send a text so she gets my number, etc.?
Previously, my typical number exchange would be as follows:
- propose we exchange numbers, she agrees
- I whip out my phone, ask for her number, type it into a text message that simply has my first name in it, then send that message, and tell her I'm texting you with my name
- ask if she got the message
This has a few advantages:
a) quick/fast, no need for me to give her my number afterwards. I always find the number exchange to be slightly awkward, and I'd like to get it done as quickly and efficiently as possible and get back to chatting
b) By sending and asking if she received the text, we confirm that we typed the number correctly
c) By sending my name, she knows exactly who the text is from, and if she happened to have forgotten my name, it provides a social "get out of jail free" card to remind her of my name.
d) If I happened to forget her name, I'll ask her how to spell her name while typing in the contact, which gives me a social "get out of jail free" card to remind me of her name
The only disadvantage to this system, is that following up a text of "$my_name" with "Hey $girl_name, wonderful to have met, ~ $my_name" feels slightly repetitive.
I've tried making my first text the icebreaker text itself, but it feels a bit awkward typing out a longer message while the girl is waiting for me to start talking to her again.
I've tried just storing her number as a contact, but that loses advantages B/C. Sometimes the girl straight up asks me to text her with my name so she knows who the number is from.
I've tried getting her number, and then giving her my number, so I can "save" the icebreaker text for later. But it feels redundant to read out my number into her phone after she already did it for me.
I realize this is a really small minutiae, but I was curious about what you guys have found best for the smoothest "number exchange".
