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How to attract her again?

crajveer

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Dec 18, 2012
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Alright , so this girl named Jessica used to like me , she even approached me first as i didnt notice her at school. She had put in so much effort into talking to me , but i never gave any back. After the summer i realized she had gotten so hot and know i was interested in her. However know that i talk to her she dosent seem that interest anymore, how do i get her interested into me again ?
 

Novacane

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I remember coming by a post by Chase I don't know the exact words but it had something to do with look for progress not reactions. Something along the lines of sometimes no signs from a woman is the best sign, now I'm only starting out too but I have realized that the girls who were all flirty and out there within the first time of interacting never really stuck around, while girls who reacted neutral or seemed to act cold towards me indeed had interest but was only shown while we were on our own and alone. So my advice would be to ask her her schedule see when she's free and set up a date from there! Good luck.
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
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Hi Crajveer,

crajveer said:
Alright , so this girl named Jessica used to like me , she even approached me first as i didnt notice her at school. She had put in so much effort into talking to me , but i never gave any back. After the summer i realized she had gotten so hot and know i was interested in her. However know that i talk to her she dosent seem that interest anymore, how do i get her interested into me again ?

Seems like she went into auto-rejection. She had put so much effort into talking to you. You didn't give anything back. Always remember to be warm to girls you also NOT INTERESTED WITH Now she feels that she is hotter, (dress well and make up) she decides to pick up someone who would respond to her. Eventually you want to find other girls you interested in.

Check out "Think in numbers" by Chase.

Zac
 

Flames

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I think Chase mentioned something about being honest and humble.

In your case probably something along the lines of "Hey I know you used to put a lot of effort into getting to know me but I was unsure if I liked you and didn't want to waste you time, how about we go out for a drink/movie etc and see how we get along?"

You basically have to be fairly persistent because you've demonstrated a lack of social skills in not recognising the effort she was making, but you can't directly apologise, because that will show an even weaker frame.

The problem with this is your setting yourself up to chase her so you have to be careful not to overdo it, which is where the difficulty lies when your new at this.

Hope that helps, and keep your options open. ;)
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
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Flames,

Flames said:
I think Chase mentioned something about being honest and humble.

In your case probably something along the lines of "Hey I know you used to put a lot of effort into getting to know me but I was unsure if I liked you and didn't want to waste you time, how about we go out for a drink/movie etc and see how we get along?"

You basically have to be fairly persistent because you've demonstrated a lack of social skills in not recognising the effort she was making, but you can't directly apologise, because that will show an even weaker frame.

The problem with this is your setting yourself up to chase her so you have to be careful not to overdo it, which is where the difficulty lies when your new at this.

Hope that helps, and keep your options open. ;)

By being honest and humble, it does help. By breaking the ice and give the statement "Hey i know you used......". you actually do reinstate back her wanting to be with you. The bigger picture is that if she comes to accept the date, you will come from a place of needing to working harder and evoke more feelings from her than before. You can't show weaknesses, a weak frame, and yea you can't apologize.

In my opinion, it is better for you to find other options for well, It's too much work, and what if she is not what you want?

p.s: Guys really do fall in love with girls for their attractiveness and all, but it sums up nothing when she's not into you anymore.

Zac
 

Franco

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However know that i talk to her she dosent seem that interest anymore, how do i get her interested into me again ?

Hi crajveer,

I'm going to be a bit more brutally honest here. The above posts are correct in that you should start improving yourself and begin talking to other women. You need to develop an abundance mentality so that you aren't focused on just trying to obtain one girl.

There is a great place to start learning how achieve this mentality in this post here.

Now, with that being said, your first mistake was probably approaching Jessica after you noticed her change in appearance. By approaching and talking to her immediately after the change, you are validating her increase in attraction and placing her on a pedestal above you. Women are socially intelligent; she will pick up on this and probably assume that she is now too attractive for you and already has you chasing her. You do not want to be caught in this situation.

You can choose to approach her directly likes Flames had mentioned:

I think Chase mentioned something about being honest and humble.

In your case probably something along the lines of "Hey I know you used to put a lot of effort into getting to know me but I was unsure if I liked you and didn't want to waste you time, how about we go out for a drink/movie etc and see how we get along?"

...but this direct approach will probably come across as a bit try-hard, and you might just be validating that she is now "too hot" for the likes of you.

Your best bet would be to only talk to her if she approaches you first. You need her to believe that her change in appearance has only drawn the "weaker" men toward her, but the "stronger" men will need more than a makeover to win over. In the meantime, you should actively be approaching and meeting new women. This might get her to chase again, but you might even find that you are no longer interested in her at that point! ;)

- Franco
 

Flames

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Franco: but you and I both know she won't approach him now :)

This is a 'one girl' post and so it's pretty much a lost cause anyway, hence me giving that advice above. IMHO the direct approach is never a bad thing as it sets the record straight one way or the other.
 
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

Franco

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Franco: but you and I both know she won't approach him now :)

=)

Most likely. Learning to meet new, higher quality women is what this website is about. ;)

- Franco
 

Rasta

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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Flames said:
Franco: but you and I both know she won't approach him now :)

You'd be surprised! I messed up BIG TIME with this girl from high school once, stopped answering my txts etc, and a year later she txted me asking to meet up. I think she was pissed at her boyfriend or something, but either way I was a happy camper and I didn't mess up that time ;)

I'm with Franco on this one. Let her be for now, meet other people!
 

crajveer

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Dec 18, 2012
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thanks for the feedback guys, ive started to chase her a little bit and know i see some compassion towards me, know im trying to get to to chase me again to improve my results, but donyworry, she aint the only one im hitting on ;)
 
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