- Joined
- Jun 28, 2021
- Messages
- 348
I have been approaching plenty of 2-sets in bars, and I have a small problem.
In about 50% of these sets, I have an initial good reaction from my target girl, but then at later stage of the interaction, she usually withdraws and is starting to push me towards her friend.
In one interaction, my target girl was initially very involved, talking a lot, smiling, telling me that she is having a blast conversation, sharing a lot of details, etc. And then at some point, she would go pretty quiet, distanced, withdrawing from the conversation and going to her mobile phone. Looks like auto-rejection kind of.
In another iteration, the girl was still somehow active in the conversation, but he started suggesting that I should take her friends phone, because she needs some decoration help at her house. She even pushed us both to exchange numbers. Then about 5 minutes later when we went outdoors, some dude came over, talking for like 5 seconds for music she likes, and she gave him her number, so they can go out to a live music venue another time. I don't think she was really going to do this, or was attracted to him, because when he reapproached, they essentially left the venue pretty much immediately.
It frustrates me because my consious intent is never really to go for the other chick. I try to stay social and respectful to the other girl, but I'm not interested to pursue her in a romantic way.
I'm suspecting that I miscommunicate my intentions. Usually the friend girl digs it and also shows interest, but I don't really care.
Any advice on how to avoid this situation?
I guess it could be as simple as to change proportion of interaction, just get more involved with the target girl, ask her more questions, look at her longer, decrease proximity.
I feel like it can be inner game issue too. The target girl is more attractive in my mind so I'm more cautious towards her, while the other one is more 'whatever'. The paradoxical result seems to be that I'm creating more attraction in the wrong girl.
In about 50% of these sets, I have an initial good reaction from my target girl, but then at later stage of the interaction, she usually withdraws and is starting to push me towards her friend.
In one interaction, my target girl was initially very involved, talking a lot, smiling, telling me that she is having a blast conversation, sharing a lot of details, etc. And then at some point, she would go pretty quiet, distanced, withdrawing from the conversation and going to her mobile phone. Looks like auto-rejection kind of.
In another iteration, the girl was still somehow active in the conversation, but he started suggesting that I should take her friends phone, because she needs some decoration help at her house. She even pushed us both to exchange numbers. Then about 5 minutes later when we went outdoors, some dude came over, talking for like 5 seconds for music she likes, and she gave him her number, so they can go out to a live music venue another time. I don't think she was really going to do this, or was attracted to him, because when he reapproached, they essentially left the venue pretty much immediately.
It frustrates me because my consious intent is never really to go for the other chick. I try to stay social and respectful to the other girl, but I'm not interested to pursue her in a romantic way.
I'm suspecting that I miscommunicate my intentions. Usually the friend girl digs it and also shows interest, but I don't really care.
Any advice on how to avoid this situation?
I guess it could be as simple as to change proportion of interaction, just get more involved with the target girl, ask her more questions, look at her longer, decrease proximity.
I feel like it can be inner game issue too. The target girl is more attractive in my mind so I'm more cautious towards her, while the other one is more 'whatever'. The paradoxical result seems to be that I'm creating more attraction in the wrong girl.
