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How to reduce neuroticsm and increase conscientious - Big5

empath

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Feb 16, 2024
Messages
495
Strange, I have changed employers 10 times since I began working in 1998. I’ve never stayed 5 years with the same company.
Maybe you crave it now, while earlier you didn't used to care or maybe you won't take any job where risk of losing it was high compared another seeming more secure with slightly lower pay or some inconvenience.

Or changing company could be driven by monetary growth but you looked at security in the job as well.
 

empath

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Feb 16, 2024
Messages
495
Glad you found something in it.


Those are the traits I have and leverage. You need to find what traits YOU have and leverage those. Start with all of your traits in the big five. Figure out the strengths and weaknesses inherent to your score and go from there. I found running them through chatGpt particularly helpful and interrogating it on my particular traits. Might work for you too.


I’ve been this way since my early teens, and probably before that too..

It was never a choice - I actually do wish i could care a little more..It would make life easier in some areas.

Believe it or not neuroticism and the internal alarm system that comes with it have their benefits..


Birth. Both my parents are pretty low in neuroticism, I’ve just inherited this trait to the extreme fsr..

Internally when things happen that alarm others, my brain just observes it without much of an emotional response. I have very little sense of urgency even when there is a clear threat to things i should value..

I observed pretty early on that what the average person feels at a 10 emotionally, i’ll feel at most a 4. I just have low arousal in general unless attached to a goal I’ve decided is important and even then it isn’t much..

Future wise. I have goals sure, and I achieve the ones I actually care about. But the future isn’t something I worry about (the future is barely real to me tbh, hard for me to conceptualize) i just know that whatever happens I’ll have to face it good or bad, sometimes it’ll go well sometimes it won’t. It is what it is. If i live I’ll be fine, If i don’t even less need to worry. Things always work out. I’m kind of a nutcase lol.

Edit: Now that I think of it I only conceptualize the future in context of my goals. Outside of that it is fuzzy and basically fictional.

Self employed out of necessity. I’m inherently unemployable. Usually jump from job to job when i was employed. Massive gaps on the resumé.. Work, stack money as quickly as possible, leave, live off stack, run out of stack, find new source of income, stack and repeat. I leverage my high openness to learn high value in demand skills and profit from that till the pay falls with demand..
Currently in the process of finding a source of income that is both sustainable & leverages my inherent quirks/abilities.

Employees??! I can’t think of anything worse than having employees. I’d probably do what I can on principle, if i decided it was morally interesting, but if the ship must burn it burns. I’ll find another ship or stick to dry land in future.

One weakness of my personality, wrt leadership is that i don’t care to take responsibility for others. It’s every man for themself in my world. Limits the depth of my relationships and cuts me off from the types of relationships most women inherently seek at some level.

In short..

Be careful of the traits you wish for empath..

Empathy and neuroticism have their value. Low conscientiousness too. Make it a priority to know yourself deeply and manipulate your personal reward system to achieve what you want and avoid/manage what you don’t..

Check out this quiz - it can help you find out what inherently motivates you.
I got adventure. Someting else to leverage on your path to success..
I think you are a software engineer.

Can you get a bit into details of how you have staked this money into the past.

Also, about life style, do you indulge in luxaries or try to live on bare minimum.

Lastly, any thoughts on how someone with accounting and finance background can do this?

( I don't think finance has technical skills outside of a job, we are working on excel and ppt and BS clients, unlike software development which leans into creating a product somewhat)

(
 
the right date makes getting her back home a piece of cake

topcat

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Dec 20, 2012
Messages
898
I think you are a software engineer.

Can you get a bit into details of how you have staked this money into the past.

Also, about life style, do you indulge in luxaries or try to live on bare minimum.

Lastly, any thoughts on how someone with accounting and finance background can do this?

( I don't think finance has technical skills outside of a job, we are working on excel and ppt and BS clients, unlike software development which leans into creating a product somewhat)

(
lol in this economy, I don’t know what to tell you. But avoid tech like the plague 😂

I used to lead a life of feast and famine, so both, times of luxury, times of frugality.

Currently it’s just famine 🤣

Not too familiar with finance/accounting but my bias is always to suggest contracting/self employment. Not sure if that’s right for you but i can’t give much advice other than that…
 
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