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How to relate without making it obvious? (Building connection)

DaVinciMatrixStyle

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Oct 26, 2020
Messages
194
So I was reading another book by Juggler (PUA from long time ago). Basically in his book he says, 'be the one that girls relate to, instead of trying to relate to the girl' because youre the rock to the girl.

That's the general philosophy.

I also feel like it's a try hard when I'm in a conversation and I'm TRYING to build a commonality with her.

Ex: I'm talking to a classmate about her experiences working at a hospital. She's actually talking bout her intern experience as a hospital worker where she saw dead bodies for the first time. (medical student).

It will be weird for me to be like 'omg my friend works at a hospital too and he also saw dead bodies'.

It's just an obvious example.

Can someone talk about the art of connecting without trying to relate so try hard?
 
a good date brings a smile to your lips... and hers

Glow

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Nov 11, 2019
Messages
500
DaVinciMatrixStyle: Juggler was one of my favs back in the days

you can relate to any subcomponent of it

eg the feeling of seeing dead bodies maybe from a funeral or alike

death is another lead.. that brings a broad repertoire of topics - eg how realising and confronting death brings aliveness..

also you dont need to relate to every single thing - pick the ones where you have a good reference OR those that provide more seductive smart emotions

So you can strategically ask into it and get other "topic leads" to relate on which might be smart to create better feelings steering the convo (riker)

Or pace and lead..
 

DaVinciMatrixStyle

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Oct 26, 2020
Messages
194
DaVinciMatrixStyle: Juggler was one of my favs back in the days

you can relate to any subcomponent of it

eg the feeling of seeing dead bodies maybe from a funeral or alike

death is another lead.. that brings a broad repertoire of topics - eg how realising and confronting death brings aliveness..

also you dont need to relate to every single thing - pick the ones where you have a good reference OR those that provide more seductive smart emotions

So you can strategically ask into it and get other "topic leads" to relate on which might be smart to create better feelings steering the convo (riker)

Or pace and lead..
Damn! Good points Glow, thanks!
 
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