How to seduce your friends?

[ulrich]

Does anyone have a good advanced technique to seduce girls that are in your social clircle who are long time friends (but not necessarily close ones)?

I'm thinking specifically of a couple of female friends who I know from college (over 10 years).
I see them often at gatherings with our common friends... we are somewhat close but definitely not "really close friends"... also one of them has a boyfriend from 8 years and the other one has an on and off boyfriend but she rarely talks about the details.

I guess my real question is... is there a way to probe if an "attached" woman in your social circle would be open for lay? (without having it backfire)

Also, I know this is morally gray so I will understand if this thread gets closed but just to say, I'm not trying to hurt anyone or destroy a relationship... just want to have some fun.

 

[Rakehell]

It is definitely possible but

The thing with knowing a girl for so long and having not fucked her is alot of the initial attraction is gone. The emotional woes she feels from a new guy who might very well end up fucking her aren’t there because she’s used to your presence if you’ve been too much of a “friend”.

It totally depends on how fixated you are in her life and the framing of your interactions.

Do you think in her mind she views you as someone shes buddy buddy with? Or does she view you as a guy she kind of knows but not really?

Have you been very friendly with these girls or are you sexy and distant?

edit: I’ll be honest here after re reading I see you have known these girls for upwards of 10 years. Which is entirely too long for me to try and help you reframe so i’m going to bow out; although i’m very interested in seeing what someone with experience has to say about the situation. Im sure it is possible but it’d take some seductive surgery to pull off.

 

[Skills]

Does anyone have a good advanced technique to seduce girls that are in your social clircle who are long time friends (but not necessarily close ones)?

I'm thinking specifically of a couple of female friends who I know from college (over 10 years).
I see them often at gatherings with our common friends... we are somewhat close but definitely not "really close friends"... also one of them has a boyfriend from 8 years and the other one has an on and off boyfriend but she rarely talks about the details.

I guess my real question is... is there a way to probe if an "attached" woman in your social circle would be open for lay? (without having it backfire)

Also, I know this is morally gray so I will understand if this thread gets closed but just to say, I'm not trying to hurt anyone or destroy a relationship... just want to have some fun.

i made one a while back https://www.theskillsmethod.com/friend-zone-method-learned-failure-8-different-pivots-tales-club/ don't really know if what you are looking for...

 

[ulrich]

Do you think in her mind she views you as someone shes buddy buddy with? Or does she view you as a guy she kind of knows but not really?

Have you been very friendly with these girls or are you sexy and distant?

I’ll say it this way:
One of these girls’ father passed away last year after a long battle with cancer. I was there in the funeral. I had no idea her father had cancer.

I’m pretty sure they think of me as a guy they used to know but not really anymore.


@Skills, I read your article but in this case the girl is the one looking to get you and you shut her down.
I’m looking to get the lay

 

[Skills]

I’ll say it this way:
One of these girls’ father passed away last year after a long battle with cancer. I was there in the funeral. I had no idea his father had cancer.

I’m pretty sure they think of me as a guy they used to know but not really anymore.


@Skills, I read your article but in this case the girl is the one looking to get you and you shut her down.
I’m looking to get the lay

no originally! it looks like that due to the steps, the texts that was after to show it works..

 

[Skjöldr]

i think if it's a girl in your friend group, you wanna get you and her together alone


ask her out, you and her.

 

[Rakehell]

I’ll say it this way:
One of these girls’ father passed away last year after a long battle with cancer. I was there in the funeral. I had no idea her father had cancer.

I’m pretty sure they think of me as a guy they used to know but not really anymore.

Honestly it’ll be tricky to gauge you guy’s frame from an outsider perspective since i’m viewing from 2d vs 5d.

I feel like in your gut you’ll know if it’s possible because you’ll know how she responds to you.

Are you comfortable acting in a seductive manner around any if not all of these girls? (Speaking in low tones, prolonged sexual eye contact, touching, flirtatious banter, etc etc.)

Unless these are just your mannerisms with every girl (which I recommend).

If you feel like in your gut acting this way around them may be weird they probably think the same.

If not then you’ll have to reverse whatever frame they may have of you (in your case you think their frame is one of “I kind of know him but not really”).

You have to put yourself on the market essentially. On their hookup radar after being ambiguous for so long if that makes sense. All of this while maintaining plausible deniability.

Hence the seductive surgery.

Think of it like when a hot girl in a social circle gives mixed signals to every guy. They all feel like they have a shot but they aren’t sure. It’s essentially the reverse.

It isn’t pickup its more like changing how they perceive you without raising any boyfriend or anymore friend flags.

 

[ulrich]

i think if it's a girl in your friend group, you wanna get you and her together alone


ask her out, you and her.

@Phoenix, you are right.
How dumb of me, didn’t even think of that.

Any suggestion for an excuse to isolate in this scenario?

Honestly it’ll be tricky to gauge you guy’s frame from an outsider perspective since i’m viewing from 2d vs 5d.

I feel like in your gut you’ll know if it’s possible because you’ll know how she responds to you.

Are you comfortable acting in a seductive manner around any if not all of these girls? (Speaking in low tones, prolonged sexual eye contact, touching, flirtatious banter, etc etc.)

Unless these are just your mannerisms with every girl (which I recommend).

If you feel like in your gut acting this way around them may be weird they probably think the same.

If not then you’ll have to reverse whatever frame they may have of you (in your case you think their frame is one of “I kind of know him but not really”).

You have to put yourself on the market essentially. On their hookup radar after being ambiguous for so long if that makes sense. All of this while maintaining plausible deniability.

Hence the seductive surgery.

Think of it like when a hot girl in a social circle gives mixed signals to every guy. They all feel like they have a shot but they aren’t sure. It’s essentially the reverse.

It isn’t pickup its more like changing how they perceive you without raising any boyfriend or anymore friend flags.

I think I get you.

So far I have tried to send non-verbal signals with voice tone and looks but they don’t react and I really can’t tell if it’s because they reject the invitation or ignore it.
I haven’t been able to think of anything more direct without killing the plausible deniability.

As I write this I’m thinking of asking something like “don’t you ever feel bored of being with the same person?” and maybe sharing something like “I miss the rush of being single and being with new people”.

What do you think?

 

[ocean_eyes]

I've done this. Happened like this:

First I opened up to her about my recent relationships, held nothing back since we're just friends. I spoke matter of factly, but also way more descriptively than I would to a guy friend. Highlighted all the romantic moments.

She in turn opened up to me about the problems in her relationship.
I generally kept it positive and tried to frame her BF as a good guy tho.

I eventually started saying things like:
-If she did something cool/nice: "OMG i could kiss you! but i would never..we're such good friends"
-If she shared something about herself: "hahah man we're so alike, we could never date"

Basically always disqualifying. This was over the course of a few weeks and several times hanging out.

I kept getting more sexual with my gaze and voice, and one time stopped mid-conversation and kissed her neck.
(Not out of the blue - I think she was showing me a cut on her leg, and I was tracing it with my finger - something like that)

I was the first one to pull back and say "we shouldn't do this," then went right back to it.
Game over.

----

Not advanced enough to theorize what to do in your position, but I hope any of that helps!

 

[Skills]

I've done this. Happened like this:

First I opened up to her about my recent relationships, held nothing back since we're just friends. I spoke matter of factly, but also way more descriptively than I would to a guy friend. Highlighted all the romantic moments.

She in turn opened up to me about the problems in her relationship.
I generally kept it positive and tried to frame her BF as a good guy tho.

I eventually started saying things like:
-If she did something cool/nice: "OMG i could kiss you! but i would never..we're such good friends"
-If she shared something about herself: "hahah man we're so alike, we could never date"

Basically always disqualifying. This was over the course of a few weeks and several times hanging out.

I kept getting more sexual with my gaze and voice, and one time stopped mid-conversation and kissed her neck.
(Not out of the blue - I think she was showing me a cut on her leg, and I was tracing it with my finger - something like that)

I was the first one to pull back and say "we shouldn't do this," then went right back to it.
Game over.

----

Not advanced enough to theorize what to do in your position, but I hope any of that helps!

^ this is part to seduce women with bf or hubby, i do this...

 

[Rakehell]

I’d find an excuse to incidentally spark up a conversation away from the group. Escalate your nonverbals and keep them tight.

Since you don’t really “know” them you have a lot of leeway to brush up on the right topics and get her emotionally invested in you in the right ways.

Steer clear of any previous rapport that reminds her of things you did as friends, such as the girl who’s funeral you went to.

Get to the root of them so you can be moved from that ambiguous category; keeping your nonverbals tight, while also setting new frames of you two doing stuff together. Test if they’re compliant by getting them to do things you ask them.

Build a sexual tension, their body language should give it away.

Try and move them when possible, see if they’ll go for a walk with you, or a smoke, whatever your fancy. I personally don’t think a “date” is necessary because you’ve known them for so long. Get them worked up enough and try to isolate if they’re reciprocating your energy.

If they seem resistant or aloof i’d back off and try again later. The plausible deniability comes from not making any overt moves it has to just happen.

This is what i’d do in your shoes atleast let me know if this helps.

 

[ulrich]

Thanks guys, I think now I have a somewhat clearer course of action.
Isolate, make suggestive sexual talk, keep plausible deniability all times and escalate physically + vibe…

That should help break the ice.

Thanks!

 

[Rakehell]

yup, and most girls are all about keeping their reputation clean so don’t worry too much if things dont work out

as long as u arent offensive or say anything extremely uncalibrated they usually take it as a compliment

ive flirted with girls with boyfriends in my social circles & even though nothing came of it they didn’t blow it out of proportion

just dont make it obvious in front of anybody but else