How to take skills to next level?

[barneystin]

I’ve been studying seduction for about 6 months now and I think I’m at a good intermediate level. I can approach most girls I want to during day game, start conversations, get number and set up a date. During night game, I’ve gotten a couple same night lays under my belt (my consistency is terrible though) and I can almost always get a girl invested and get the number (which I know doesn’t mean shit for the most part in night game).

Currently living in New York city so I think I have a good playing ground to work with. I’m just curious about how the advanced guys on here got to be advanced (advanced for me is getting high retention with girls you want and having consistency with night game).

Here’s my action plan for the year:
- Getting better at sex talk: I’m convinced this is almost a prerequisite to being advanced since it opens up so many opportunities
- Reinforcing a pulling mindset: sometimes I literally forget to go for the pull and I think this has cost me a bunch of lays. This goes hand in hand with learning to read subtle escalation windows
- Frame control
- Dealing with guys interrupting my sets (historically I’ve been too lazy to deal with this but I want to change that)

Are there any things that I might be missing from the list? I’m aware that this list might look different for everyone but I’m really curious about what took your game to the next level

Also open to wingmanning in nyc if any advanced guys on here are down

 

[West_Indian_Archie]

1) You can do more specific tech

• Qualification - How much are you doing? You can always do more, especially as you "want to keep your number low", and not just put your pepperoni in every calzone in the city.
• Investment - how much is she doing? She can always do more.
• Compliance Loops/Cooperation Loops
• counseling/psychotherapy classes - to get better deep dives, and reach more gestalts and insights.

2) You can build a stronger base

• Counseling
• Meditation
• Vocal Projection/Diction/Enunciation
• Improvisation Classes - both acting and comedy
• Acting Classes - to learn how to emote/use your nonverbals better than your verbals
• Dancing - adds a skillset, but also increases non-thirsty physical contact
• MMA - *pause* - You want to break out some of the physical manipulation skills that you learn on the mat, but onto women. There was a time in PUA history, where learning how to make a girl do a dance-like spin boosted her endorphins
• Social Circle Building using Pick Up Skills - Expansion of social circle - i.e. making new strong friends and "weak" friends is a key to getting more exposure to more people, different people - which in turn builds your database of stories and experiences. NYC especially, the more different sub-cultures you can connect with, the more types of women you have access to - some of which you'd have a tough time cold approaching "in the wild". (Like Chinese Cuties in Flushing or in EE girls in Gravesend/Coney Island.)

 

[barneystin]

1) You can do more specific tech

• Qualification - How much are you doing? You can always do more, especially as you "want to keep your number low", and not just put your pepperoni in every calzone in the city.
• Investment - how much is she doing? She can always do more.
• Compliance Loops/Cooperation Loops
• counseling/psychotherapy classes - to get better deep dives, and reach more gestalts and insights.

2) You can build a stronger base

• Counseling
• Meditation
• Vocal Projection/Diction/Enunciation
• Improvisation Classes - both acting and comedy
• Acting Classes - to learn how to emote/use your nonverbals better than your verbals
• Dancing - adds a skillset, but also increases non-thirsty physical contact
• MMA - *pause* - You want to break out some of the physical manipulation skills that you learn on the mat, but onto women. There was a time in PUA history, where learning how to make a girl do a dance-like spin boosted her endorphins
• Social Circle Building using Pick Up Skills - Expansion of social circle - i.e. making new strong friends and "weak" friends is a key to getting more exposure to more people, different people - which in turn builds your database of stories and experiences. NYC especially, the more different sub-cultures you can connect with, the more types of women you have access to - some of which you'd have a tough time cold approaching "in the wild". (Like Chinese Cuties in Flushing or in EE girls in Gravesend/Coney Island.)

Appreciate the response, man! Will look into incorporating these as well

I’ve considered taking MMA to help with general life confidence. Dancing classes too since I have terrible rhythm but I haven’t thought about acting/improv classes yet - will give that a shot.


I also realized I’m way too modest about the investment I ask for. A girl I hadn’t laid at the time drove about an hour to come see me even though I was a bit nervous to ask so perhaps I need to feel a bit more entitled in that sense. Will be working on that as well!

 

[StrayDog]

If you haven't already, develop a solid date structure.

something like

CONVO

Stage 1, meet and greet: playful banter. put her at ease. Casual convo. start date easy going.

Stage 2, deep dive: once convo has momentum get into a little more personal topics.

Progression goes something like: fun social topics (travel, adventure, friends, hobbies)- more candid topics, hopes fears, secrets-

relationships/dating (majority of deep dive about this), past present future. what worked what didn't, desires, etc...

this is when you can start setting solid frames

Stage 3: Sensationalize convo. this is when sex talk and sensual pleasure come in. A little goes a long way. Don't over do it.

Pull


If any of the later stages have objections address them before moving forward.

Also, you will want to fractionate your conversations. Just be sure to stick to the general tone, and topics of the stage you are in. Don't take too many steps back to a stage that has passed, or rush to a stage that hasn't arrived yet

TOUCH

Stage 1: greet with warm hug and slightly lingering touch, to break touch barrier right away.

Stage 2: minimal touch. Maybe just once or twice to set a precedent. Make it intentional and brief. "let me see that ring" (touch hand).

"You can sit closer you know".(she scoots closer) "good to see you" (place hand on upper back)

Stage 3: still minimal touch. but more erotic quality/ areas.

-touch knee
-brush hair back over her ear
-run finger up the length of her arm

Again, no need to over do it. Sometimes a little goes a long way, others you can lean into it more, but always leave room for wanting.

Pull: hand on the swell of her back as you leave the venue


Oh also, consider having a couple nearby bounce spots in case energy needs to move before pull. Usually somewhere between stage 2 and 3.

Obviously all of this isn't rigid. Just basic waymarkers to move things forward nicely.

This is the template I use and my dates have improved ten fold ever since I started doing it with consistency.

 

[barneystin]

If you haven't already, develop a solid date structure.

something like

CONVO

Stage 1, meet and greet: playful banter. put her at ease. Casual convo. start date easy going.

Stage 2, deep dive: once convo has momentum get into a little more personal topics.

Progression goes something like: fun social topics (travel, adventure, friends, hobbies)- more candid topics, hopes fears, secrets-

relationships/dating (majority of deep dive about this), past present future. what worked what didn't, desires, etc...

this is when you can start setting solid frames

Stage 3: Sensationalize convo. this is when sex talk and sensual pleasure come in. A little goes a long way. Don't over do it.

Pull


If any of the later stages have objections address them before moving forward.

Also, you will want to fractionate your conversations. Just be sure to stick to the general tone, and topics of the stage you are in. Don't take too many steps back to a stage that has passed, or rush to a stage that hasn't arrived yet

TOUCH

Stage 1: greet with warm hug and slightly lingering touch, to break touch barrier right away.

Stage 2: minimal touch. Maybe just once or twice to set a precedent. Make it intentional and brief. "let me see that ring" (touch hand).

"You can sit closer you know".(she scoots closer) "good to see you" (place hand on upper back)

Stage 3: still minimal touch. but more erotic quality/ areas.

-touch knee
-brush hair back over her ear
-run finger up the length of her arm

Again, no need to over do it. Sometimes a little goes a long way, others you can lean into it more, but always leave room for wanting.

Pull: hand on the swell of her back as you leave the venue


Oh also, consider having a couple nearby bounce spots in case energy needs to move before pull. Usually somewhere between stage 2 and 3.

Obviously all of this isn't rigid. Just basic waymarkers to move things forward nicely.

This is the template I use and my dates have improved ten fold ever since I started doing it with consistency.

Appreciate the response!
I have a similar process that I use for my dates. I will say that I haven’t gone on a cold approach date in a while since I’ve been more focused on night game. I guess I’m just trying to get my night game skills as sharp as possible so I can pull whenever I want