How to use social media (Instagram, Telegram, Snapchat) effectively for social circle and seduction (college)

[Conquistador]

I have no real experience with social media due to being relatively low-tech up to now. Bur it seems that everyone at college has a major social media presence, except for me; people keep asking me for my Insta, which I don't have.
Before I change that, though, I'd like to spend some time figuring out how to do it like a pro, i.e. how to utilize the platform(s) in a highly effective manner. This means:
-Connecting and communicating effectively with people at college, as well as new people I don't know IRL
-Cultivating a following (the larger and higher-quality the better, obv)
-Clearly conveying the best possible version of my real-life personality, with its intelligence, coolness, hotness, gravitas/dominance, etc.
-Spending time on social media efficiently and intentionally instead of wasting hours a week endlessly scrolling in boredom like many of my female peers

Currently, I have less idea of how IG, Telegram, and SC works than some of your (grand)parents do. Up to now, my experience has been solely with text, Google Chat, and Discord.

To the uninitiated, like myself, social media platforms are alien planets, with their own culture. Apart from a new set of etiquette, norms, etc. the rules of the game (in the broad sense, not only game) are completely different. It's only common sense to research an alien planet before traveling there.

Any and all advice is welcome.

 

[HoofHearted]

I have never, ever gotten laid because of social media. And not from lack of trying.

Truth is, I think it has actually hurt my prospects.

Allow me to give you a metaphor, young man.

Getting pussy is like turning a playing card face up. The window of opportunity is the duration of the card turning. Once it is face up, it is all identified and revealed and the game is over.

Social media seems to turn the card over, i.e. expose your mystery/mystique or whatever. No flipping the card, no becoming known until you've been balls deep.

A huge mistake I make is being insecure. I would tell/present every aspect of myself girls to try to get them to value me. This is not the way, let me tell you from experience. This is not how women value.

I would recommend no. I imagine super savvy guys could pull it off. Is that you? Nah probably not.

All this is most likely a distraction, because you're afraid of something. Maybe you know what you should be doing (approaching women IRL) but are too scared?

You strike me as kind of a sensitive guy. This is a blessing and will serve you greatly in life, but it's also kind of like starting life in hard mode. If you're like me, you're going to have to actively work to embrace your masculinity. Hard knocks comin', baby.

But if you're again like me, and you survive the process, you will be at your core something special wrapped in all that a developed man should be.

Fuck Instagram. Go take your knocks, get hurt, make mistakes. Be the biggest loser in the room (or as everyone might think), be rejected and undesired (by some women). This is your destiny. You can take it, I promise you. Because you are a man.

 

[HumanWhoLearns]

The people I've seen who have social-media pages that draw you in also have excellent communication skills in real life. These are people who've mastered the game of socializing which has allowed them to form the social circles they want. Their social media pages are simply an online representation of what works for them in real life with people.

In my opinion, your social media can never be 'good' without handling your real life first (not insinuating that this is a problem for you IDK, this is just general advice).

My question would be do you even want to go to all the trouble of trying to make your online presence look good. Because I imagine that it is a lot of work only to try to impress people (which may or may not work). That is just bad for mindset imo. Online only seems to work for guys with abundance and a lot of experience. It's a lot harder for a girl to ignore you and easier for you to stand out when you show her you have the balls to go up to an attractive stranger when nobody else is doing that.

 

[Conquistador]

I have never, ever gotten laid because of social media. And not from lack of trying.

Truth is, I think it has actually hurt my prospects.

Allow me to give you a metaphor, young man.

Getting pussy is like turning a playing card face up. The window of opportunity is the duration of the card turning. Once it is face up, it is all identified and revealed and the game is over.

Social media seems to turn the card over, i.e. expose your mystery/mystique or whatever. No flipping the card, no becoming known until you've been balls deep.

A huge mistake I make is being insecure. I would tell/present every aspect of myself girls to try to get them to value me. This is not the way, let me tell you from experience. This is not how women value.

I would recommend no. I imagine super savvy guys could pull it off. Is that you? Nah probably not.

I wasn't really thinking of pulling via social media. But I'm concerned it might impair social circle if I don't have it at all.

All this is most likely a distraction, because you're afraid of something. Maybe you know what you should be doing (approaching women IRL) but are too scared?

So, the truth is that up to now I haven't been going for numbers (from anyone) or otherwise actively trying to form friendships (with some exceptions). Partly because of a messy logistical situation involving getting a new phone, which I'm going to deal with once I'm not choking on deadlines. Partly because I haven't been feeling up to doing as much socializing in the past week and a half due to exhaustion, sleep deprivation, etc. (see my journal). And partly because I grew up in a bit of an ivory tower, and I'm still figuring out how the college social scene works.

You strike me as kind of a sensitive guy. This is a blessing and will serve you greatly in life, but it's also kind of like starting life in hard mode. If you're like me, you're going to have to actively work to embrace your masculinity. Hard knocks comin', baby.

But if you're again like me, and you survive the process, you will be at your core something special wrapped in all that a developed man should be.

Fuck Instagram. Go take your knocks, get hurt, make mistakes. Be the biggest loser in the room (or as everyone might think), be rejected and undesired (by some women). This is your destiny. You can take it, I promise you. Because you are a man.

You're mostly right. At the same time, I've already gone through all that during teenagehood... you really have no idea (altho I didn't get much rejection from girls due to not being exposed to them much).
I'm ready for something different. And honestly, part of the process of the past year or so has been realizing that the role I was cast in isn't necessarily who I am, or who I want to become. So...it's complicated.


Honestly, I'll probably stick to good ol' fashioned text to get girls...but I'm legitimately concerned that not having social media is going to push me out to the periphery of the social scene. Not that I'm super extroverted most of the time, but at this point I'm already no longer "that guy who does his own thing out in the wilderness".

 

[Conquistador]

The people I've seen who have social-media pages that draw you in also have excellent communication skills in real life. These are people who've mastered the game of socializing which has allowed them to form the social circles they want. Their social media pages are simply an online representation of what works for them in real life with people.

In my opinion, your social media can never be 'good' without handling your real life first (not insinuating that this is a problem for you IDK, this is just general advice).

My question would be do you even want to go to all the trouble of trying to make your online presence look good. Because I imagine that it is a lot of work only to try to impress people (which may or may not work). That is just bad for mindset imo. Online only seems to work for guys with abundance and a lot of experience. It's a lot harder for a girl to ignore you and easier for you to stand out when you show her you have the balls to go up to an attractive stranger when nobody else is doing that.

Honestly, I'm not interested in sinking a lot of effort into making an attractive profile. I'm more interested in not ****ing up everything.

 

[ulrich]

For “regular dude” with some extra points, post a couple pictures of you doing something cool, a couple of pictures with your friends having fun, one with a dog and one exercising if you got a good physique.
Add a fun or snappy bio.

And after that, just abandon the account.

You’re basically communicating you’re a regular guy, perhaps slightly above average and beacause you’re not active, you can’t be judged on anything else.

That’s all you need, most girls use social networks to make quick judgements about you or put you into the ‘acquaintance’ box.
Neither is in your best interest beyond passing the litmus test that you are not some kind of weirdo.

So just do the bare minimum and you should do OK.