Long-Term I have no idea what to talk.. ?

[PeaceInHeart]

Hey,

I need your help regarding something about long term relationship.

Talking, talking.. so much for last couple of years..
Now, I feel, I don't have any interesting thing to talk with her..
We have a very healthy, good relationship so far, I don't want to make it bored.
She calls me whenever she gets a free time..
To be honest, We talk lot..
Sometimes we have nothing to talk, but we still wait there in silence.
I feel it bad when it happens.

Sometimes I wonder, what do couples talk after they get married ?

When we first met, whatever we talk, it feels quite interesting..
But how we can get that feeling again when relationship goes on.. ?
How to get that same feeling again and again without expiring.. ?

Looking forward your replies.
Thank you.

 

[Chase]

Peace-

Best thing to do here is be always learning new and interesting things you can talk about with her. e.g., "I read this crazy study today where they found that..." "In my scuba diving class today, they had us go do..." "My violin instructor taught me a new song today - here, let me play it for you..."

Once you more or less know everything there is to know about each other, there's not much new to explore about each other all that often (occasionally; you might start reading about zodiac signs and decide to read up on hers and tell her what the predictions were for her astrologically this year and whether you think they're accurate or way off the mark, something like that; or she might tell you a story from her childhood she'd never told you before because it's relevant to something you're discussing, and she just thought of it), which means most of your discussion will be about new things you're discovering and learning.

You can also do couple-y things, like watch movies together in genres you both like (action, comedy, etc.), or take day trips to places you haven't been to before, or check out new restaurants, or go to your favorite restaurant.

Don't feel like you always have to be generating new and stimulating conversation at all times, though. In part, it depends on the girl... there are SOME girls who are always in need of stimulation, but you'll be able to recognize these girls because they'll always have new and exciting and stimulating and dramatic things to tell YOU, too (about friends, coworkers, etc.). Most women are fine with a little comfortable silence now and then, especially in longer term relationships. The transition from the excitement of "new" to the contentedness of "familiar" happens in every relationship that goes on longer than a year or two.

Chase

 

[PeaceInHeart]

Thank you Chase.. !

Sometimes I wonder, how you studied such things after reading your articles.
I think that you are a big fan of learning, exploring new and interesting things.
I know now...... why ?
Because it really helps you to maintain your relationships without boring in same time..

But, I quite don't understand one thing chase.
How do you manage your time ?
(Don't you have any idea to do an article about that too..)

Thank you once again.
You show me the way to do it.

Fingers Crossed...!

 

[daviddreamer]

I get this problem in my current relationship because the woman I have is very reserved, quite, inexperienced, and just shy in general so I am the one always initiating the conversations. I did a lot of deep diving for a long time but now even that is getting stale she isn't getting engaged anymore so its starting to turn into long sessions of small talk...and then she says its getting boring when she is the one who makes no effort to initiate any kind of conversation or say something. Half the time I wonder if she is even listening which is pretty bad considering the "standard" to me feels like usually its the guy who fails to listen.

Oh and I swear to god our relationship runs so smoothly sometimes she stirs up drama and shit to have interesting conversations...