If you're not in the field, it's all hypothetical

[Chase]

Just a general note, because we have had an influx of guys lately who are doing various things besides being out in-field, then trying to argue against the merits of being in-field.

If you are not in the field, everything you are thinking about game is mental masturbation. You cannot learn to seduce women inside your head. It is impossible. I don't care how clever you are, your head is not an accurate representation of the physical universe. You are also not going to be able to accurately simulate the complex thoughts, behaviors, and reactions of even a single flesh and blood woman inside your head, let alone the whole of womankind. Your brain is doing a hard enough job just managing your own thoughts, feelings, and mental processes... it doesn't have the carrying capacity to imagine in any kind of realistic detail what it would be like to be a woman who is engaged in a conversation with you, nor do you actually have any genuine idea how various other people actually see you ("we never know just how we look through other people's eyes"), especially if you are not in field.

You also cannot learn to seduce women in your apartment. I mean, if you are studying useful game material that is designed for in-field use, okay, that is helpful... but only IF you use it IN-FIELD and turn that book learning into experiential learning.

All these theories you see from guys who are not in-field:

• Looksmaxxing
• Statusmaxxing
• Gymcelling
• Women are too picky now because of online attention
• Etc. etc.

... are a product of NOT BEING IN THE FIELD.

Nobody who is in the field, interacting with women in real life, in any kind of reasonable volume, is able to support any kind of rigid belief in this stuff. If you are in the field, you will figure out that looks have an effect, status has an effect, the gym has an effect, women have less ASD now because judging women is taboo and everybody's egos are a bit bigger/more sheltered/entitled and people can't imagine being criticized for talking about sex, and so on.

You also discover a whole bunch of other stuff that the guys who are not in field have no idea about, like that girls weigh all these various qualities very differently, and that you can have ugly girls with sky high standards who play super hard to get, and stunning girls with appallingly low standards (or maybe you were just exactly their type) who are super easy pulls, and all kinds of weird stuff the guys who are mentally masturbating could never imagine.

If you are not in-field, get in-field.

Real Empiricists Test

In the comments of Saturday’s article about signs you’re in the friend zone, uForia makes the following comment: “Ive been a long time reader of your articles, and I can’t help but be skeptical at times. Your posts often have a tone of disliking competition from other men, and what makes you...

www.girlschase.com

Otherwise, trust me, you are wasting epic amounts of time filling your head with rubbish, all of which is going to get pushed out after your first month in the field, and then you are going to wonder what the heck you were doing with your life during all that time you were going around out of the field cramming the rubbish into that space between your ears, mentally masturbating yourself.

edit: thanks to @bgwh pointing out below -- if you are feeling overwhelmed and don't know WHERE to start in the field, then FIRST... complete the Newbie Assignment:

Newbie Assignment

Introduction If you're brand new to the idea of approaching getting better with women and dating as a skill set, not to worry - most people in most parts of the world don't think of it that way yet, either. The great news is, anything can be learned as a skill - be that thing painting, writing...

www.skilledseducer.com

After that, if you need more pointers on what to do next, ask the other members here. You can also take the Girls Chase "Girl Q" Diagnostic and complete the homeworks in whichever book you receive, or go through my book How to Make Girls Chase or my One Date System and complete the homeworks in each of those. Whichever you pick, I suggest you stick to just one set of homeworks / one series of assignments at a time -- once again, that way you are avoiding overwhelm.

Chase

 

[bgwh]

As someone who in the past spent many years being a mental masturbator and not going into the field, I can say that a lot of the blame lies in overwhelm. The problem with go into the field is that there's mountains and mountains and mountains of information on things you must know and do in the field.

There should be something minimal for guys who are like this, just to start challenging their beliefs. Something like "feel free to keep believing what you believe, but only if you first complete these newbie missions", and something simple.

"Go out into the field" is too vague, too broad, too overwhelming. The internet offers literally tens-of-thousands of pages of conflicting information what you need to do "in the field".

 

[Chase]

Thanks @bgwh, that's an excellent point.

That's something it's easy to forget when you get too familiar with all the material.

There is a lot of potential material to go through, and for new guys starting out, it is hard to know what it is most important to focus on first -- it is also hard to even find sometimes the right place to look for beginner stuff.

Come to think of it, while we do have a "New? Start Here" sub-board here in Beginners, we probably need a prominent page in the navbar that walks total newbies through it step-by-step.

Chase

 

[orkie123]

I would add one more thing, because this is something I sometimes forget and definitely didn't realise the power of when I was a complete beginner -

Always attempt to escalate/close.

and preferably, do it in the most 'efficient way' - don't ask for her insta, ask for her number. Don't ask for her number, get her on an instant date/different night time location. And depending on circumstances (particularly in night game or date situation), ask her directly back to your place/location where the fun can happen.

If you do that, it won't matter if you miss indicators of interest, or escalation points. Sometimes you are just lucky, other times she wanted you to do that.

There's been a few pulls where I did it mostly for the sake of it, thinking given the interaction, there is no chance... and then she agrees and it's smooth sailing.