I'm Overwhelmed By Game

[authenticSelf]

I am feeling overwhelmed by how difficult online game is turning out to be. I am on four dating apps and getting rejected right and left. I do think I am being evaluated more by women than nothing- essentially getting rejected mostly. I have been unable to make anything work in the last 3 months.

Sometimes, I wonder how I even got with women before- it seems so difficult!

 

[Skills]

I am feeling overwhelmed by how difficult online game is turning out to be. I am on four dating apps and getting rejected right and left. I do think I am being evaluated more by women than nothing- essentially getting rejected mostly. I have been unable to make anything work in the last 3 months.

Sometimes, I wonder how I even got with women before- it seems so difficult!

do you know historically online dating is horrible in winter due to boyfriend season.... Why instead of multiple apps, you combine with actual live day or night game?

 

[M_Ronin]

do you know historically online dating is horrible in winter due to boyfriend season.... Why instead of multiple apps, you combine with actual live day or night game?

Wait... What is boyfriend season?

 

[authenticSelf]

Hey @Skills, my luck has been much better in coffee shops. Atleast I have gotten phone numbers but nothing has flipped yet. I have gone to bars but I am terrible in bars- I approach and mostly get rejected. I need to go to bars farther from my house because I am too self conscious to escalate on women in bars where everyone knows me haha. I need to do something different. I am just in the dumps. There is just too much effort to get myself in bars. My available gaming time is between 7pm-11pm on workdays and all day on Saturday & Sunday. My go-to right now are coffee shops and starting conversations with women

 

[Sub-Zero]

@authenticSelf Yeah I agree with @Skills, online dating has slowed down a lot for me recently.

I just started this year and had too many matches to really count. Took a break and then got back on and I barely get matches.

That said, online dating is a supplement, focus on other parts of game.

 

[Sub-Zero]

Wait... What is boyfriend season?

Basically late fall and winter. That’s when girls try to have a boyfriend for the holidays.

 

[Tony D]

I quit online dating (in Canada) completely because it just depressed me. Damn near impossible to get the quality of girls I get from cold approach. At least if I fuck up cold approach I know that it's because I fucked it up, not because my profile height was too short, or my age wasn't in their preferred range. I always ended up coming out of Tinder feeling like I just spent days on a cellphone game or something. Just a total waste of my time. It's easier to just go to a mall, or a bar. Attraction is a not a choice, but on Tinder, it is.

 

[Sub-Zero]

I quit online dating (in Canada) completely because it just depressed me. Damn near impossible to get the quality of girls I get from cold approach. At least if I fuck up cold approach I know that it's because I fucked it up, not because my profile height was too short, or my age wasn't in their preferred range. I always ended up coming out of Tinder feeling like I just spent days on a cellphone game or something. Just a total waste of my time. It's easier to just go to a mall, or a bar. Attraction is a not a choice, but on Tinder, it is.

Damn for real? Why do you put your height on tinder and how old are you putting your age? I remember you saying you would say you’re 34 to some girls, and to me that doesn’t seem that old at all. What’s the age range that girls prefer on there?

 

[authenticSelf]

@Tony D , thanks for your input man. I am so in the dumps right now because of this. I swipe right on most women with even a remote possibility. I have gotten into some back and forth but thats about it. I am a really high quality guy: I have a great job, my own place, I have good character, I volunteer haha... Getting ignored on dating apps because I made a remark at the wrong time is really fucking with my psyche and self worth. I have to remind myself that I have a lot to offer! Moreover, I am trying to find a quality woman and the general advice here is to bang a lot of mediocre women to hone my skills and I'd then be able to pickup the hot ones. This is not sitting well well with me because I feel horrible after my last lay

 

[ElderPrice]

Tony is completely right and my own experience matches his.

You also don't seem to realize that online dating is like 99% photo quality. If you think women are taking 10 minutes to comb through your profiles and assessing all the details, you are wrong. They see a photo and that photo is either top tier compared to everyone else, or it isn't and that's basically all their assessment right there. Notice I'm saying PHOTO, not necessarily your looks. A great looking man taking bathroom selfies isn't going to get many results because those photos are quite lame looking. A not-great looking man who has photo(s) of him in sexy poses with perfect lighting, great wardrobe choices, perfect depth of field, perfect background, etc. will get many results because those photos make him look like a superstar.

My advice: Don't waste your time on these apps. That includes wasting your time chasing these pro-level photos that probably won't be perfect enough anyway when you get them back and try them. Learn how to do real, in-person day and night game, and you'll get more results with significantly more attractive women. If you've wasted enough time on these apps already, you WILL find yourself every now and then saying to yourself: "Wow. This girl gave me her number/went out with me/slept with me/whatever. Not even one girl of her attractiveness level even matched with me online!" Happens to me all the time.

 

[naturalmikey]

cuffing season. summer's over girls find a boyfriend. summer comes they dump him and fuck everybody else.

there might be something you're doing wrong. i hate to say this because no one wants to hear it, but alternatively you may not be good looking enough for online. if you want to post your profile i'll give you my honest opinion on which it is. but i have a deep understanding of aesthetics and it could hurt your feelings. having said that, i'll say that i'd rate myself a six in facial aesthetics. but in height i'm a 9 and body i'm an 8. so i'm likely a 6.5. the good news is that's actually good enough to slay online. flattering pics help tremendously.

 

[Sub-Zero]

cuffing season. summer's over girls find a boyfriend. summer comes they dump him and fuck everybody else.

there might be something you're doing wrong. i hate to say this because no one wants to hear it, but alternatively you may not be good looking enough for online. if you want to post your profile i'll give you my honest opinion on which it is. but i have a deep understanding of aesthetics and it could hurt your feelings. having said that, i'll say that i'd rate myself a six in facial aesthetics. but in height i'm a 9 and body i'm an 8. so i'm likely a 6.5. the good news is that's actually good enough to slay online. flattering pics help tremendously.

Do you think portrait mode is good enough until I get better pics?

 

[naturalmikey]

Do you think portrait mode is good enough until I get better pics?

portrait mode is great. i have a dslr but most of my pics are still portrait mode. just make sure you're not looking directly at the camera in most pics. it's okay here and there. the more it looks like a pic that could be in a magazine the better. you can also turn up saturation and contrast slightly with vsco cam.

 

[Sub-Zero]

portrait mode is great. i have a dslr but most of my pics are still portrait mode. just make sure you're not looking directly at the camera in most pics. it's okay here and there. the more it looks like a pic that could be in a magazine the better. you can also turn up saturation and contrast slightly with vsco cam.

Yeah I have a few nice guy pics with me looking in the camera and smiling that aren’t in portrait mode. They happened to be pics I took that I have in my phone that I liked.

Girls liked the pics too, but I know I can do better, right now I need to lose some serious weight to take these new pics, hopefully it doesn’t take too long because I’m tryna speed this shit up.

 

[authenticSelf]

alternatively you may not be good looking enough for online. if you want to post your profile i'll give you my honest opinion on which it is.

@naturalmikey this might be true. I also don't have pro quality pics. Most of my pics came from my cellphone and Facebook when I'm out and about. Will send you pics I have on apps

 

[Mr.Rob]

@authenticSelf
Find your niche (sounds like daygame) and just focus on getting progressively better until youre getting good results.

Do you live in a decently big town with a mall or a busy downtown or other places than coffee shops.

Itd be nice to take your weekend off and just focus totally on daygame. Do instant dates on girls that are free and improve your "date" skills while your still waiting to tighten your game to the point you're able to turn #'s into dates.

Once you get some momentum, some instant dates, collecting phone numbers, and dump the online stuff your confidence anf self esteem is going to skyrocket.

 

[BlandMan0]

Trust me I am as well.

Most of these girls lie anyway. I'm sure they been with older men and been wrapped around their game and expertise. It's just the validation that they get and even I'm trying to shake out of that. It's just too many guys who give them attention. Some got the nerve who have kids. It's best a girl tells you she rejects you then to be just plain ignored and rejected(they use you on this one when they're all used up).