Improving with these two sets

[weekendwarrior]

Hi guys, I went out a lot to night clubs over the weekend. There were a few notable two sets I'd like feedback and advice on what I could have done better.

Set 1 | Got approached and struck out very quickly
I was on the dancefloor waiting for my wing while he was at the bar, there were two chicks that walked over and placed themselves next to me. I glanced at them and made eye contact with the hotter one of the two, she approached me and said I love your hair, I complimented her hair back while touching it, she smiled and said thanks while looking at me expectantly with big doe eyes.

I went to take her hand to which she quickly pulled it away saying it’s a vape. I say confidently I don't want your vape. She still pulled her hand away clutching her vape saying no, takes her friends hand to start dancing and says I'm dancing with my friend closing their circle and excluding me. Very confusing, if she didn't want anything to do with me why bother opening?

Set 2 | Strong SOI, curve ball to change targets, excluded
There was a two set, a red head and a blonde chick. The blonde looked at me a couple of times and we exchanged warm smiles, it seemed like an obvious SOI/AI. I recognised a guy near them and went to talk to him, mid conversation my eyes met the blonde chicks' eyes again, it seemed like a strong connection, I took her hand, she gave me it and I gave her a twirl. We danced a bit, the red head was standing like a spare part, I took her hand and danced with both chicks moving them around.

Surprisingly the blonde chick pulled her hand away where the red head didn't, I opted to change target. The guy I was talking to tried making a move with the blonde but got nowhere, I was still in set with the red head. I put my hands on her waist which she seemed excited about at first, after 10 seconds or so she pulled my left hand of her waist but was happy to keep my right hand on her. Not long after this she went back to the blonde chick where I was excluded while they danced with each other. I tried hanging in set but ejected to not look needy.

Set 3 | Halloween | Got approached and failed again
Another two set, a fat chick and a hot chick. They both open me telling me my costume is amazing, I thank them and tell them that their costumes are awesome and touch them both on their arms. The hot one asks me what she's dressed as, I know what she's dressed as to which she has a big smile. I end up taking both of their hands to dance with both chicks which seems to be going well until one of their chick friends comes over and starts dancing with the hot chick leaving me with the fat one I wasn't interested in anyway.

I kept in set dancing with her to not be so blatantly rude of immediately walking away now the hot chick wasn't dancing with me. We danced for maybe a minute and the fat chick tells me she's just got to check on her friends, jumped to the far side of their group, and looked like she had no intention of coming back, the first bit of good luck I had! Later I got dancing with another hot chick which went nowhere but shortly after this fat chick popped back up again. I'm assuming preselection but I still wasn’t interested in the fat chick.

@ulrich these are some examples of reactions I've got with being approached but i can't convert to results. I've got better examples where I'm unable to interact which I'll write up

Warrior

 

[ulrich]

hey @weekendwarrior, I am certainly not the most experienced nightgamer but perhaps @Teevster can help.

My impression is that, in these three sets, you didn’t reach the hook point.

The openings were good and you started dancing/conversations with these girls.
Now, girls in nightclubs are somewhat in a defensive mode so you have to quickly set yourself apart with either some kind of comfort or sexuality (whatever they actually need), all while escalating compliance… this has to happen fast… once you reach the hook point, things get a little easier.

What I usually do is mixing exciting dance/fun moves with “boring” chit chat… “how do you know each other?”… “you look like my little sister”… more on the comfort side.

Try balancing looking like a cool fun normal guy (care about them) instead of a prowler and they may stay for a little longer.

 

[Skills]

1.- you got too exired and grab hand, probably a sloopy escalation and timing off... i try to delay escalations till girl lower guard and think i am safe then i gradually microescalate looking for compliance, you triggar asd, your timing was off and escalation off, grabbing on dance floor, nono unless latin beats or latin music...

2.- again similar to 1 sloopy escalations, and they were not hooked..

3.- again no hooked and the fatty can tell u didnt like here and going nowhere she left...

 

[Zoro]

Bumping your thread @weekendwarrior because in the chat you mentioned that you are feeling pretty stuck.

This is in response to not just this post, but a few others that I skimmed through.

I noticed you go for the hand grab a lot.

I'm curious to know what your overall demeanor and vibe is when you approach. Seems like girls are interested in you and give you IOIs, but then you approach and they go cold quick.

That combined with you going for hand holding all the time, makes me think you're carrying yourself in some off putting way that we could try and pin point for you to work on.

Can you give us some more details? What are you fundamentals like? Are you watching and noticing the girls' energy levels, where her attention is, what she is doing, considering her friends, etc?

 

[Beck Bass]

I went to take her hand to which she quickly pulled it away saying it’s a vape.

She was thinking you were trying to rob her? Somehow? lmao

We danced a bit, the red head was standing like a spare part, I took her hand and danced with both chicks moving them around.

Keep your eye on the ball. I would just talk to the girl and let her address her lonely friend, but before that I would try to get some solid compliance going... Like leave the friend alone for a while. I happens a lot in club, and to be real, those types of groups are the biggest problem in night (club) game, you gotta choose one girl and just stick with it, for the most part. Jealousy from girls on her own group (that many times are friends, if not family sometimes lol) is the easiest way to fuck up a set. I wouldn't adress the other women unless specifically needed, I'm mostly just social with the other girls (I might have to address better if it's like a mother hen, but those days I just say fuck it, ignore the mother hen and work behind her back lol)

 

[weekendwarrior]

Thanks @Wick I'm definitely feeling stuck.

I'm not sure what my demeanor and vibe is when I approach, I try to approach quickly from the AI or IOI, I've tried waiting a bit and pre approaching as a way to warm the chicks up, this usually forces more AIs and we exchange looks and smiles, I'll walk over or I'll body rock and get a set up to talk to them if I was already next to them and most the time they'll still ignore me.

I don't think my vibe or demeanor changes, I just walk over confidently or open them and if they don't ignore me, smile at me and ignore me/run away they'll usually look at me like I've kicked their gran. I've had wings (men/chicks) point out chicks that are interested (I noticed the AI) to get this look which confuses my wings as much as it does me.

I've had wings, chicks and random gay guys say that I'm very manly and dominant, I seem very chilled, relaxed and confident, it's an intimidating vibe but in a good way. I've tried to soften this edge but the results are the same.

The hand grabbing isn't mostly grabbing, it's more signalling for their hand which they comply but then eject quickly after. I'll transition from safe places like forearms to hands testing the waters, it goes well until it doesn't.

My fundamentals are better than my game I'm lean, good muscle mass in an athletic shape, dress in well fitting clothes, worked on my posture and walk and get complimented on my voice. My fundamentals get reactions, my game doesn't get results. Chicks have opened me saying I look like a marvel super hero and still run away when I talk to them... (Honestly I'm not even good looking, I'd say I'm a 7 on a good day)

I consider her energy levels and try to match it, I'll consider what she's doing, where her attention is and consider her friends. I'm usually a little put off approaching when her friends are with her, ironically I can win the friends over and still strike out with the chick.

Warrior

 

[weekendwarrior]

@Beck Bass she must have thought I was trying to rob her , ironically most other chicks and some dudes offer me their vape like it's the peace pipe. I do find phones and vapes are used as emotional support for anxious people. I was seeing a chick last year that vaped, I noticed at times she'd vape more and she's tell me that she was nervous.

As for keeping my eyes on the prize, in my experience if I don't engage the friend in this situation they interrupt and block, the chick I'm with will talk about her friend and say they can't leave her, (it was early in the night and it would be low odds to extract) or they don't approve because I've not been social with them.

I try to preemptively stop her from breaking the circle/bursting the bubble and seem cool and social. Usually this has worked out better for me than letting her address her lonely friend, though this changes later in the night. I try to think about the timing of the night and assess where the chicks focus is.

Warrior