Interesting Situiation

[Kenchin]

A little backstory: Basically I was at a bar, where I took a friend out to get some beers (she just lost her job/ dog). Wasn't “dating” my ex at the time, but ending up sitting not too far from each other, I saw her with a bunch of her girl friends and some guy friends (Might have been a little bit jealous). She waved at me and I waved back and continued talking to my friend who i came out with. So I get a text from her to come and say hi. Me being drunk and slightly buzzed say “I’ll talk to her tomorrow”, the next thing I know I get a text saying “No thanks”

I never really apologized or anything because I never thought I was in the wrong

This was in Jan, now were in May

Up to Date: So this ex who I’m still kinda into. And I see her all the time at the college bar that we both go to. Usually when I see her she’ll wave and i’ll wave back, nothing crazy. I might have drunk texted her one time on the previous Tuesday about how we should get back together, but the next day told her it was a drunk text (She didn't reply).

Now this past Sunday (Cinco de Mayo) I was outside on the patio for this bar with some friends, and all of a sudden she walked in and just gave my brother a huge bear hug (And I was drunk but I swear she was looking at me when she did it)! He just slowly pushed her off ( I know my brother’s not interested in her) but I dont know whats her problem I thought was on good terms with apme actually

Now it’s been three days and I wanted to text her “Hey ******* I know this is random....but what was up with bear hug u gave ****** last Sunday??”

Any Feedback positive or negative is appreciated

 

[Chase]

Kenchin-

It sounds like she was trying to move you into an orbiter role - women sometimes do this with exes to make themselves feel more secure / validated. That way they know that if they need you, you're there. (i.e., the cool thing of her to do would be to come and say hi herself, not to command you to come to where she is to say hi to her - that's neither cool nor respectful)

But you didn't go for that, and it made her upset.

The bear hug was an attempt to make you intrigued and jealous so you'd start chasing and move into that orbiter position.

And it sounds like it worked - you're about to text her asking about it, letting her know she's pulling your strings just like she intended to.

I don't see anything coming of this aside from you wasting a lot of time and getting upset and her getting a little emotional validation from having her ex chase after her again... I'd cut this girl off and go find someone new.

Chase

 

[Kenchin]

I know this took a while to reply. But yea it was a waste of time, already meet a bunch of other women not worried or care about her, thanks for the advice chase!